Tuesday, April 10, 2018 Edition: #6194

A Bull in Hand Is A Sheetload of Fun!

BS SHOW BIZ BUZZ:
★ Jimmy Kimmel is apologizing. The comedian posted a lengthy mea culpa on Twitter after he received backlash for some of the comments he made while engaged in a Twitter feud with Fox News host Sean Hannity. The feud began when Hannity took offense to a joke Kimmel made on his show about First Lady Melania Trump. On Friday, during a heated exchange with Hannity, Kimmel at one point tweeted, “Don’t worry – just keep tweeting – you’ll get back on top! (or does Trump prefer you on bottom?) Kimmel’s apology read in part: “By lampooning Sean Hannity’s deference to the President, I most certainly did not intend to belittle or upset members of the gay community and to those who took offense, I apologize.”
-TheBlast
★ Russell Crowe’s ‘Art of Divorce’ auction has made over $3.7 million, with a jockstrap worn in one of his movies among the more popular lots. A number of unusual items went to high bidders, with a jockstrap that he wore while filming “Cinderella Man” selling for $7,000, despite an estimated price tag of $500-$600. A dinosaur skull that Crowe bought from Leonardo DiCaprio fetched $65,000, while a pair of 18th century duelling pistols went for $26,000 and a bronze warship cannon sold for $20,000.
(How does one estimate the value of a historical jockstrap?)
-ContactMusic
★ Ivana Trump is scrambling to get back ownership of her good name during a time when being affiliated with the Trumps can mean big money. After the U.S. Patent and Trademark Office pulled the ripcord on the commercial rights to Ivana’s name and deemed it abandoned, she filed documents claiming she didn’t mean to ignore the requests, but that she received the paperwork too late and couldn’t make the USPTO’s deadline. She wants the name revived ASAP, for the purposes of “merchandising and entertaining”.
-TheBlast
★ Justin Bieber hasn’t written-off Conor McGregor, who made headlines recently following a violent attack. When asked about the former champ, Bieber said that, “we all make mistakes.” And when asked if he thinks that the UFC should fire McGregor, Justin replied, “I mean, honestly…I don’t know. I don’t know.”
(We thank you for your insightful commentary…)
★ Tracy Morgan will be honored with the 2,633rd star on the Hollywood Walk of Fame today. He is best known for starring for seven seasons on “30 Rock” and for seven seasons on “Saturday Night Live”.
-WalkofFame

TODAY’S SHOW BIZ SKED:
• “Jimmy Kimmel Live” (ABC/Global): Eva Longoria, Sebastian Maniscalco, Daniel Caesar featuring H.E.R.
• “The Tonight Show starring Jimmy Fallon” (NBC/CTV): Jon Hamm, Emily Ratajkowski, Khalid & Normani
• “The Late Show with Stephen Colbert” (CBS/Global): James Spader, Katie Couric, Louie Anderson
• “Late Night with Seth Meyers” (NBC/CTV): Timothy Olyphant, Wyatt Cenac, Gil Sharone
• “The Late Late Show with James Corden” (CBS/CTV): Reba McEntire, Lucy Hale, Glenn Howerton, Kelsea Ballerini
• “Conan” (TBS/Comedy): Hilary Swank, Zach Woods, the Lone Bellow
• “Watch What Happens Live” (Bravo): The cast of “The Real Housewives of Beverly Hills”
• “The View” (ABC/CTV): Madeleine Albright
• “The Talk” (CBS): Zooey Deschanel, Lorena Garcia, Mo Rocca
• “Live with Kelly and Ryan” (ABC/CTV): Jon Hamm, Louie Anderson, the winner of the 2018 Masters Golf Tournament
• “The Ellen DeGeneres Show” (NBC/CTV): Eva Longoria, Colin Hanks, Pauly D
• “Elton John: I’m Still Standing – A Grammy Salute” (CBS): A celebration of his illustrious career and songs, featuring performances by Alessia Cara, Miley Cyrus, Lady Gaga, Miranda Lambert, John Legend, Kesha, Little Big Town, Chris Martin, Shawn Mendes and more.
• “Andre the Giant” (HBO): A look at the life and career of professional wrestler André Roussimoff, who gained notoriety in the 1980s as Andre the Giant.

BS MUSIC NOTES:
• Beyoncé – has reportedly hired close to 100 dancers for her performances at Coachella this weekend and next. She was scheduled to headline last year’s edition of the festival, but passed the slot to Lady Gaga after announcing her second pregnancy.
• Cardi B – revealed on Saturday Night Live this past weekend that she is pregnant. During her performance of ‘Be Careful’, the camera pulled back, revealing that her elegant white evening gown was indeed showcasing her pregnant belly.
• Rick Astley – still has ”no idea” why he was invited to perform with Foo Fighters. He was invited by Dave Grohl to join them onstage at Japan’s Summer Sonic Festival last August. Quote: ”I never met them [before]…I didn’t know what it was all about. And then he just kind of whispered and said, ‘We’re doing your tune, but we’re gonna do it like ‘Teen Spirit’’, and that was it. And off we went.”
• David Bowie – his longtime producer Tony Visconti says that once Mick Jagger crashed a Bowie recording session and light-heartedly attempted to sabotage the work in progress. When asked to keep his thoughts to himself, Jagger replied: “I guess I’ll do down the road and sabotage Joni Mitchell’s album.”
• Doobie Brothers – have re-recorded their classic ‘Listen to the Music’ for an album of the same name to benefit ‘Playing for Change’, an organization aimed at building music and art schools for children all over the world. It comes out April 20.
• Elvis Presley – his former wife Priscilla claims that he committed suicide when he died of a drug-related heart attack. On the new HBO documentary, ‘Elvis Presley: The Searcher, that the King’, she says that loved ones and members of his entourage tried to get him off drugs, but “You did not tell Elvis Presley what to do. You did not.”
• Yoko Ono – A rock valued at $17,500 because it was part of a Yoko Ono art installation has been stolen from display at a Toronto museum. The weather-worn stone carries the words “Love yourself,” inscribed by Ono, and was an element in her work entitled “Yoko Ono: The Riverbed”.
• Dustin Lynch – wanted to give Brad Paisley a thank-you for having him on tour, so during their Friday show in Nashville, while the two were performing Paisley’s ‘I’m Still a Guy’, Lynch brought out a goat on a leash, and handed it to Paisley during the line, “I might walk your sissy dog”.
• Miranda Lambert – she and her beau of two years, Anderson East, have split, according to a report from US Weekly, citing “multiple sources”. Neither Lambert nor East have addressed the rumors publicly.
• Garth Brooks – surprised Country Music Hall of Famer Bobby Bare during his 83rd birthday Grand Old Opry concert Saturday night, when Brooks joined Bare onstage to invite Bare to officially rejoin the Opry family.

THIS WEEK’S VIDEO RELEASES:
• “Molly’s Game” (R-Rated, Drama): The true story of Molly Bloom, an Olympic-class skier who ran the world’s most exclusive high-stakes poker game and became an FBI target. (Jessica Chastain, Idris Elba, Kevin Costner)
• “The Greatest Showman” (PG, Drama/Musical): Celebrates the birth of show business, and tells of a visionary who rose from nothing to create a spectacle that became a worldwide sensation. (Hugh Jackman, Michelle Williams, Zac Efron)
• “All the Money in the World” (R-Rated, Drama/Mystery): The story of the kidnapping of 16-year-old John Paul Getty III and the desperate attempt by his devoted mother to convince his billionaire grandfather Jean Paul Getty to pay the ransom. (Michelle Williams, Christopher Plummer, Mark Wahlberg)
• “Phantom Thread” (R-Rated, Drama): Set in 1950’s London, Reynolds Woodcock is a renowned dressmaker whose fastidious life is disrupted by a young, strong-willed woman, Alma, who becomes his muse and lover. (Vicky Krieps, Daniel Day-Lewis, Lesley Manville)
• “Proud Mary” (R-Rated, Action/Adventure): Mary is a hit woman working for an organized crime family in Boston, whose life is completely turned around when she meets a young boy whose path she crosses when a professional hit goes bad. (Taraji P. Henson, Billy Brown)

RIVETING QUESTION:
So, what’s with that leather patch on the back of your jeans? Most brands of jeans have them, but why? It turns out that the waistband patch on the back of many jean brands is a way of telling you that they are a legit brand name, rather than a knockoff. Or at least that’s how they started. The patches, which are actually called ‘jacrons’, were introduced by Levi’s in 1873. It contained the now-famous ‘Two horse’ trademark so even the illiterate or those who couldn’t read English could tell that the jeans they were purchasing were high-quality denim. At one point they were made from genuine leather, but more recently brands have been using faux leather made of paper. And of course, newer denim brands have since added their own branded jacrons to their pants.
(I thought it was just so everyone could read my pants size!)
(So if I understand correctly, they put a brand label on it so everyone would know it was their brand? Makes sense.)
(Now they have entire factories making counterfeit jeans and other factories making the fake labels for them!)
(That’s great. Now tell me whose great idea it was to put a zipper down THERE!)
-YahooStyle

MAKIN’ BACON:
There is no greater tradition for kids than to take off to summer camp for a week or two. But this camp might be something that is more of a ‘Dad’ thing: Camp Bacon. And it’s real! A place for the bacon-inclined to go to celebrate everything beautiful about…yes, bacon. This year’s Camp Bacon will be held in Ann Arbor, Michigan from May 31 through June 4. It’s actually more like a food festival than a traditional summer camp, but you’ll be able to take part in things like this…in a fun, camp-like atmosphere:
• A bacon film festival, featuring caramel bacon popcorn and cuban pork zingers,
• A baking with bacon class
• A ‘Bacon Ball’, featuring a pig roast, live music and dancing
• 13 speakers, food demonstrations, and more.
WEB: https://www.zingermanscampbacon.com/schedule/#lineup
(I think I just found something at camp that’s a whole lot better than archery!)
(They finally found a way to make the campfire smell even better!)
(Take my money, please!)
-SimpleMost

COMMON ACRONYMS THAT YOU WEREN’T AWARE OF:
➢ Smart Car: Swatch + Mercedes + Art
➢ GIF: Graphics Interchange Format
➢ GEICO: Government Employees Insurance Company
➢ Arby’s: a play on RB, for the chain’s founders, the Raffel brothers
➢ NERF: Non Expandable Recreational Foam
➢ Laser: Light Amplification by Stimulated Emission of Radiation
➢ Time (magazine): The International Magazine of Events
➢Canola Oil: Canada Oil, Low Acid
➢SPAM: Shoulder of Pork and Ham
➢TCBY: The Country’s Best Yogurt. (It originally stood for “This Can’t Be Yogurt”—until the company was sued by “I Can’t Believe It’s Yogurt!”)
➢ SOS: doesn’t stand for anything! It was chosen as a sign of distress for its unmistakable Morse code representation—three dots, three dashes, three dots
-ReadersDigest

BS CHRONOMETER 04.10.18

TODAY’S CELEBIRTHDAYS . . .
1929 [89] Max von Sydow, Lund, Sweden, movie actor (“Star Wars: The Force Awakens”, “Strange Brew”), TV actor (Emmy nom for his role as Three-eyed Raven in “Game of Thrones”)

1936 [82] John Madden, Austin, MN, Legendary NFL coach and commentator (Monday Night Football) Retired in 2009

1952 [66] Steven Seagal, Lansing, MI, actor (“Above the Law”, “Under Seige”), martial artist

1974 [44] David Harbour, New York, actor (‘Jim Hopper’ on “Stranger Things” since 2016)

1980 [38] Bryce Soderberg, Victoria BC, rock bassist (Lifehouse-‘Hanging By a Moment’, ‘Halfway Gone’)

1983 [35] Andrew Dost, Cass City MI, pop bassist-keyboardist (fun.-‘Some Nights’, ‘We Are Young’)

1984 [34] Mandy Moore, Nashua NH, movie actress (“A Walk to Remember”)/pop singer (‘Candy’)

1987 [31] Shay Mitchell, Mississauga ON, TV actress (‘Emily Fields’ on “Pretty Little Liars” 2010-2017)

1988 [30] Haley Joel Osment, Los Angeles, CA, child actor (“The Sixth Sense”, “A.I. Artificial Intelligence”)

1990 [28] Alex Pettyfer, Stevenage UK, movie actor (“The Butler”, “Magic Mike”)

1992 [26] Daisy Ridley, London England, movie actress (“Rey” in the “Star Wars” franchise) COMING UP… “Chaos Walking” 2019

TODAY’S BS REASONS TO PARTY . . .
• “Encourage a Young Writer Day”, because it’s an investment in our future. Some of the most famous authors began writing as children (on the walls, in crayon…)

• “Golfers Day”, honoring everyone who walks a mile chasing the little white ball, on the 102nd anniversary of the 1916 founding of the Professional Golfers’ Association (PGA).
BS GREAT GOLF QUOTES:
-“To Golf or Not to Golf?? What a Stupid Question.”
-“Golf is good for the soul. You get so mad at yourself, you forget to hate your enemies.”
-“Golf is a game in which you yell ‘fore,’ shoot six, and write down five.”
-“The worst day of Golf beats the best day of work.”
-“Golf’s Three Ugliest Words…‘Still Your Shot’.”
-“Golf is a good walk spoiled.”

• “Siblings Day”, celebrating brothers and sisters who are living, those who aren’t … and perhaps those who shouldn’t be.

• “SPCA Day”, honoring the Society for the Prevention of Cruelty to Animals, the organization that looks out for our furry little friends. It was chartered on this day in 1866. Also ‘Farm Animals Day’. Hug a cow.

• “Safety Pin Day”, legend has it that, in 1849, Walter Hunt, the inventor of the safety pin, owed a friend $15 and decided to invent something new in order to earn the money to repay him. He invented the safety pin.

AND REMEMBER . . .
[Wed] Barbershop Quartet Day
[Wed] Cheese Fondue Day
[Thurs] Only Child Day
[Thurs] Drop Everything and Read Day

THIS DAY IN SHOW BIZ . . .
1992 [26] Brash stand-up comedian Sam Kinison dies at age 38 when his car is hit by a teenage drunk driver

2009 [08] “Hannah Montana: The Movie” opens in theaters, starring Miley Cyrus (the last G-Rated thing she ever does)

TODAY’S MUSIC EVENTS . . .
1970 [48] Paul McCartney announces the breakup of The Beatles

2007 [11] Johnny Cash’s last residence, a 14,000-sq-ft house in Hendersonville TN, burns to the ground after being purchased after his death by Barry Gibb of the Bee Gees

2007 [11] Pink Floyd’s 90s-era lineup (Rick Wright, David Gilmour and Nick Mason) reunite onstage to take part in a tribute to recently deceased ex-frontman Syd Barrett. It would be Pink Floyd’s final concert appearance

TODAY’S FIRST . . .
1953 [65] 1st color 3-D movie premieres, the horror film “The House of Wax”, starring Vincent Price

TODAY’S RECORD . . .
2001 [17] Michigan engineer Kevin Olmstead wins $2.18 million on ABC-TV’s “Who Wants to Be a Millionaire”, then largest quiz show prize of all-time

2005 [13] Golfer Tiger Woods becomes the 1st to win 4 Masters titles under age 30, by sinking a 15-foot birdie putt on the 1st hole of a sudden-death playoff vs Chris DiMarco

BULL’S BITS

BS WACK FACTS:
✓ Romantic love is biochemically indistinguishable from having a severe obsessive-compulsive disorder.
✓ Living in sight of water can make you calmer, happier and more creative, a study found.
✓ Just thinking about ‘Plan B’ can make it less likely that you’ll achieve ‘Plan A’.
✓ Most drivers think they are a better-than-average driver.
✓ According to a study, spending money on others yields more happiness than spending it on yourself.
✓ Phobophobia is the fear of having a phobia.
-Factslides

BS STRANGE REASONS TO DIVORCE:
• He doesn’t take the used Keurig pods out of the machine.
• She won’t stand up and prove that she doesn’t have the TV remote.
• I want to eat cupcakes without him judging me.
• The all-too-common Coke vs. Pepsi argument.
• I’m really not from Mars, and she really isn’t from Venus.
• She introduced me as her “first husband”.
• He can’t seem to comprehend the difference between there, their, and they’re.
• She’s always at my place! And now she gets her mail delivered there. It’s smothering!
• She eats her pizza with a knife and fork, for God’s sake!
• Well, Melania, see…um, there’s this porn star , and ..ummmm…
-Twitter

BS PHONE STARTER:
What is something that you’ve done…that you will never do again?

BS U-PICK TRIVIA:
What is the most ticklish part of the body?
a. underarms [CORRECT]
b. feet
c. waist
d. roof of mouth

The world record for this affliction is 102 days. What?
a. headache
b. sneezing
c. hiccups
d. constipation [CORRECT]
-VitalStatistics

BS RANDOM JOKE:
Wherever my dad is, I’m sure he’s looking down on us. He’s not dead, he’s just very condescending.

BS WATER COOLER QUESTION:
Question: The average time for this negative experience to occur is between 5:00 & 6:00 PM on Fridays. What is it?
Answer: Road Rage

BS DEEP THOUGHT:
One day, you’ll be just a memory to some people. Do your best to be a good one.