Friday, April 17, 2015          Edition: #5432

Ah, the Sweet Smell of BS!

★ After director Michelle MacLaren left the “Wonder Woman” movie earlier this week due to creative differences with Warner Bros, it seems Patty Jenkins has been tapped to take over the job. Jenkins has been in a similar position, having dumped 2013’s “Thor: The Dark World” for the same reason. The studio claims the change is a minor speed bump and production will begin this Fall as originally planned. Actress Gal Gadot is still attached to star as the Amazon princess-turned-superhero. The pic is set to bow sometime in 2017.
★ Ellen Degeneres has lost the top spot on “Out” magazine’s annual ‘Power 50’ list of the most influential LGBTI voices in pop culture to Apple CEO Tim Cook, but she’s still in a prominent position at #2. Others getting a mention: CNN anchor Anderson Cooper; Jane Lynch (“Glee”); Laverne Cox (“Orange Is the New Black”); Neil Patrick Harris (“How I Met Your Mother”); MSNBC’s Rachel Maddow; directors Lee Daniels & Bryan Singer, musicians Frank Ocean & Sia, movie actress Ellen Page; and fashion designers Alexander Wang, Michael Kors, and Tom Ford.
★ And Ryan Gosling says he “thinks like a girl”. The 34-year-old Hollywood star was raised by his mother Donna and his older sister Mandi after his parents divorced when he was 13, and he says that experience has helped him to empathize with women. Gosling says this ability to relate to woman has been beneficial because ”girls are better”. Ryan, whose long-term girlfriend Eva Mendes gave birth last September to – what else? – a baby girl named Esmeralda, clearly makes an understatement when he says: ”I have strong female characters in my life.”
– “ShortList Magazine”

• “ACM Awards” (CBS) – Sunday the 50th annual Academy of Country Music Awards, hosted by Blake Shelton & Luke Bryan (for the 3rd time) from AT&T Stadium in Arlington TX. A few highlights …
– Miranda Lambert leads nominations with 8, followed by Dierks Bentley with 7. She’s won a record 5 consecutive ACM and CMA ‘Female Vocalist Of the Year’ awards.
– Cole Swindell, Sam Hunt, Thomas Rhett are up fo ‘New Artist Of the Year’.
– Performers include Blake Shelton, Brad Paisley, Brooks & Dunn, Eric Church, Florida Georgia Line, Garth Brooks, George Strait, Jason Aldean, Keith Urban, Kenny Chesney, Lady Antebellum, Little Big Town, Rascal Flatts, and Reba McIntire.
• “Ellen DeGeneres Show” (syndicated/CTV2) – Florida Georgia Line (“Anything Goes”). Rerun.
• “Jimmy Kimmel Live” (ABC/CityTV) – Tonight Death Cab for Cutie (“Kintsugi”); Rihanna (“Bitch Better Have My Money”). Rerun.
• “Last Call With Carson Daly” (NBC) – Tonight Tijuana Panthers (“NOBO”). Rerun.
• “Late Night With Seth Meyers” (NBC/CTV) – Tonight Years & Years (“Communion”, out June 22nd). Rerun.
• “Late Show With David Letterman” (CBS/Omni1) – Tonight John Mayer (“Paradise Valley”).
• “Reba & Friends Outnumber Hunger” (CMT) – Reba’s the spokesperson for the 4th annual Outnumber Hunger campaign, which has provided over 35 million meals for people facing hunger. Tonight’s kick-off concert, also featuring Eli Young Band, Florida Georgia Line, Rascal Flatts, and Tim McGraw, airs Saturday on CMT.
• Rock & Roll Hall of Fame Induction (Cleveland OH) – Saturday at the 30th annual ceremony, the honorees include …
– Soul singer Bill Withers, inducted by Stevie Wonder.
– Green Day, ushered in by Fall Out Boy.
– Joan Jett & The Blackhearts, welcomed by Miley Cyrus.
– The late Lou Reed, honored by Patti Smith.
– The Paul Butterfield Blues Band, inducted by Peter Wolf (J Geils Band).
– Ringo Starr, welcomed as a solo artist by Paul McCartney.
– Blues singer-guitarist Stevie Ray Vaughan, inducted posthumously by John Mayer.
HBO premieres it’s compilation of the 2015 Rock & Roll Hall of Fame gala on May 30th.
• “Tonight Show Starring Jimmy Fallon” (NBC/CTV2) – Tonight Andy Summers (“Charming Snakes”); Ariana Grande (“My Everything”). Rerun.

• “Furious 7” – The movie soundtrack has moved into the #1 position on the new ‘Billboard 200’ chart, making it the 4th soundtrack in the past 12 months to top the album list.
• Garth Brooks – He’s announced he’ll be heading to Knoxville TN. His World Tour will play the Thompson Boling Arena May 29-30, and likely more dates if tickets sell out as usual.
• Iggy Azalea – She’s ended her social media hiatus … sort of. Quote: “I’m still off social media but I have decided that I’m going to do a monthly chat with you guys so we can stay connected.”
• Nicki Minaj – She has confirmed her engagement to fellow rapper Meek Mill after posting a photo of her stunning diamond engagement ring on Instagram earlier this week.
• Wiz Khalifa – His hit single “See You Again” (a tribute to late “Furious 7” star Paul Walker) is the #1 song on the new ‘Billboard Hot 100’ chart, ending the 14-week run of “Uptown Funk” by Mark Ronson w/Bruno Mars.

• “Child 44” ( R-Rated Drama ): “The Dark Knight Rises” co-stars Tom Hardy & Gary Oldman reunite in this dark tale about a disgraced member of the Russian military police who is investigating a series of nasty child murders during the Stalin-era Soviet Union. Co-stars Noomi Rapace, Joel Kinnaman. Shot in the Czech Republic.
• “Paul Blart: Mall Cop 2” ( PG Action Comedy ): In this sequel to the 2009 comedy hit, security guard ‘Blart’ visits Las Vegas for a vacation with his teenage daughter before she heads off to college. But safety never takes a holiday and when duty calls, ‘Blart’ answers! Stars Kevin James, Raini Rodriguez, Eduardo Verástegui, Daniella Alonso.
• “True Story” ( R-Rated Mystery Thriller ): For once James Franco & Jonah Hill play serious. The story follows the cat-and-mouse interplay between a disgraced “New York Times” reporter and an accused killer who has taken on his identity. Co-stars  Felicity Jones, Ethan Suplee, Gretchen Mol.
• “Unfriended” ( R-Rated Horror Thriller ): Originally titled “Cybernatural”, this teen-targeted fright-flick centers on a group of online chat room participants who find themselves haunted by a mysterious, supernatural force using the account of their dead friend. Stars Heather Sossaman, Matthew Bohrer, Courtney Halverson, Shelley Hennig.
• Opening in limited release: “Alex of Venice” (Drama); ” Beyond the Reach” (Thriller); “Monkey Kingdom” (Documentary); and “Monsters: Dark Continent” (Sci-Fi Thriller).

Want a better life? Become a gospel singer! Just as the Obamas have been celebrating gospel music at the White House this week, new research shows that gospel singers have a better quality of life than average, with lower rates of accidental, suicidal, homicidal, and cancer-related deaths. Among the many factors discovered by Dianna Theadora Kenny, Professor of Psychology & Music at Australia’s University of Sydney, is that gospel singers are 7.5 times less likely to take their own lives than the rest of the population, and 21 times less likely than punk musicians. (Yeah, those guys in Johnny Razor & The Salted Wound just don’t seem too happy.)

At a UK auction by Henry Aldridge & Son in Wiltshire today, one of a handful of deck chairs recovered from the infamous ‘Titanic’ disaster could fetch up to $120,000. The Nantucket wooden chair was on the 1st class promenade deck of the luxury liner when it sank in 1912. The lounger, which is too delicate to sit on but which has been carefully preserved, is one of just 6 or 7 taken back to port in Halifax, Nova Scotia by rescue boats, making it one of the rarest types of ‘Titanic’ collectable. The in-depth provenance documentation confirms the chain of custody of the deck chair from one Captain Lemarteleur in 1912 through to the present day. The current owner, an English collector, has hung onto it for the past 15 years. (His wife eventually said, “You can’t sit on the damn thing … get rid of it!”)
– BBC News

A roundup of recent reasons stars have rejected tweeting …
✗ “The reason I don’t tweet as much as I use to, is because I’m sick of all the useless opinions.” (Zayn Malik, ex-One Direction.)
✗ “I deleted Twitter because I’m trying to create a safer space for myself emotionally.” (“Girls” creator Lena Dunham.)
✗ “I’ve stopped Twitter now because, although it was fun for a while, I had to stop because I was getting too much abuse.” (Irish singer Sinead O’Connor.)
✗ “I feel the hatred and pettiness I see online at all times is making me become an angry person and I cannot be that.” (Iggy Azalea)
✗ “A voice in my head told me to delete my Twitter and that’s what I did.” (Nicki Minaj)
✗ “The Internet is completely over.” (Prince)
– Adapted from

Honey bees communicate by dancing. (“Hey Bumble, why you grinding up on me like that?”)


1961 [54] Boomer (Norman) Esiason, West Islip NY, sports commentator (“The NFL Today on CBS” since 2002, “ABC Monday Night Football” 1998-99)/former NFL QB (Cincinnati Bengals)

1972 [43] Jennifer Garner, Houston TX, movie actress (“Dallas Buyers Club”)/former TV actress (“Alias” 2001-06)/Mrs Ben Affleck since 2005

1974 [41] Victoria Beckham (Adams), Harlow UK, fashion maven (dVb)/former pop singer (Spice Girls-“Wannabe”)/wed to English soccer star David Beckham since 1999

1985 [30] Rooney Mara, Bedford NY, movie actress (“The Girl With the Dragon Tattoo”, “The Social Network”)

Talk-show host Conan O’Brien (“Conan”) is 52; Rock guitarist Mark Tremonti (Creed/Alter Bridge) is 41; Reality TV’s Kourtney Kardashian (“Keeping Up With the Kardashians”) is 36; Model/actress Rosie Huntington-Whiteley (“Transformers: Dark Of the Moon”) is 28; TV actress Chloe Bennet (“Marvel’s Agents of SHIELD”) is 23; Pop singer Nathan Sykes (The Wanted) is 22.

Movie actress Ashley Judd (“Kiss the Girls”) is 47; Movie actor James Franco (“The Interview”) is 37; Movie actress Kate Hudson (“Wish I Was Here”) is 36; Movie actor Hayden Christensen (“Jumper”) is 34; Blues-rock drummer Steve Johnson (Alabama Shakes) is 30; Tennis player Maria Sharapova is 28.

• “Bat Appreciation Day”, a day to generate positive awareness about bats ahead of possible negative interactions with people after their Winter-long hibernation.
• “Blah Blah Blah Day”, a day to do all the things that people have been nagging you to do. This might include quitting a habit, losing weight, working on home projects, blah blah blah …
• “Cheese Ball Day”, saluting the hors d’oeuvre made with cream cheese, seasonings, and chopped nuts.
• “Day of Silence”, the Gay, Lesbian, and Straight Education Network’s (GLSEN) annual day of action to protest bullying and harassment of lesbian, gay, bisexual, and transgender (LGBT) students. Supporters take a day-long vow of silence in protest.
• “Haiku Poetry Day”, a celebration of the genre of poetry whose origins date back a millennium in Japan; and of English-language haiku, which has now been written for more than a century. To create one of these short poems, stick to a syllable pattern of 5-7-5.
• “Nosy Neighbor Appreciation Day”, a day to salute with a laugh the prying nature of those who continually insist on peeking-a-boo to find out what’s cooking in the neighborhood.
• “World Hemophilia Day”, a day of awareness of the genetic disorder that impairs the body’s ability to control bleeding through clotting or coagulation.

• “Auctioneers Day”, observed annually on the 3rd Saturday of April (do we hear 4?) to honor the traditional profession of auctioneering. Charity auctions are held to celebrate the observance.
• “Columnists Day”, sponsored by the National Society of Newspaper Columnists to increase awareness of the importance and contribution made by columnists and journalists worldwide.
• “Husband Appreciation Day”, observed annually on the 3rd Saturday of April as a day to appreciate your mate for all that he is. “Wife Appreciation Day” is coming up in September.
• “Record Store Day”, an annual celebration of the old-fashioned indie disc shops where people used to hang out and listen to the latest music. Foo Fighters’ Dave Grohl is this year’s official ambassador. The ‘World’s Smallest Ever Record Shop’ is popping up for the day in London UK. Many artists are offering exclusive releases for the occasion. A roundup of the goodies here …
• “World Amateur Radio Day”, honoring the worldwide hobby of ‘ham radio’. It’s observed on the anniversary of the 1925 founding of the International Amateur Radio Union.

• “Garlic Day”, saluting the ‘stinking rose’ that’s been cultivated as long as history has been recorded.
• “Hanging Out Day”, an initiative of Project Laundry List promoting energy conservation by using a clothesline instead of an electric dryer.

2014 [01] Nobel Prize-winning author Gabriel Garcia Marquez, whose novels include “100 Years of Solitude” and “Love In the Time of Cholera”, dies at his Mexico City home at age 87

2008 [07] Danny Federici, long-time musician with Bruce Springsteen’s E-Street Band, dies of melanoma at age 58 (Springsteen’s “Working on a Dream” album is dedicated to him)

1964 [51] Now collectible car, Ford Mustang, debuts at the World’s Fair in NYC (base price: $2,368)

1979 [36] ‘Smallest Crowd’ in Major League Baseball history as just 653 fans show up for an Oakland A’s baseball game (that’s not a crowd, it’s an intimate gathering)

[Mon] Pot Smokers Day
[Mon] Boston Marathon
[Tues] Bulldogs are Beautiful Day
[Tues] Kindergarten Day
[Wed] Administrative Professionals Day
[Wed] Earth Day
This Week Is … Library Forgiveness Week
This Month Is … Welding Month


1. Subject’s face begins to stretch, as if struggling to keep eyes open, while neck and goiter of subject seems to visually expand and quiver unattractively.
2. Subject insists on making a tortilla with beans and lots of mustard.
3. Subject begins to threaten loved ones with shoes, staple guns, other unconventional weapons.
4. Falling violently to the floor, subject begins to bleed from knees, already scabbed over from previous drunk.
5. Ignoring the concept of time, subject begins calling old friends who live 3 time zones ahead of them. While trying to form reasonable sentences, subject passes out on couch with head tilted back, mouth open.
– Thanks to Kevin Sampsell

☎ What’s one classic movie or book you’ve lied about seeing or reading?

I was born to be a pessimist. My blood type is B-Negative.

Question: Rubber bands are the #1 item we keep in our ‘junk drawer’, followed by THIS.
Answer: Birthday candles.

Therapy is expensive, bubble wrap is cheap … you choose.

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