Wednesday, April 19, 2017        Edition: #5956

There’s a Difference Between Sheet and Crapola!

★A scene that supposedly teases a ‘Fate of the Furious’ spin-off starring Dwayne Johnson and Jason Statham was reportedly removed from the end of the new movie at the insistence of Vin Diesel.  If the story is true, the scene was filmed because producer Neal Moritz was so impressed by Johnson’s and Statham’s chemistry throughout the making of The Fate of the Furious. Moritz, due to Diesel’s and Johnson’s real-life feud, is said to have had the scene filmed without Diesel’s permission.  (Watch for it on the DVD!)
-The Wrap
★Kim Kardashian says she ‘takes responsibility’ for Kanye West’s Hospitalization.  On Sunday’s  episode of ‘Keeping Up With the Kardashians’, Kim reacted to the devastating phone call regarding what we can only assume was husband Kanye West’s very public November 2016 meltdown and resulting hospitalization. While neither Kim nor any family member ever refers to the incident in any specific way, Kim does regard it initially by saying, “I get a call from one of Kane’s friends, and my heart drops. … I am so scared, and I don’t know what to do.”
(Umm…is that ‘taking responsibility?)
★Tom Holland’s onscreen chemistry with his Spider-Man: Homecoming co-star Zendaya Coleman has reportedly become a real-life love affair. The two young stars play teen rivals in the forthcoming Marvel movie, but it appears their fictional high school antagonism couldn’t be further from the truth.  The British actor is reportedly so enamoured with Zendaya, he is willing to walk her dog and pick up poop whenever necessary.  “It says a lot when a guy will pick up poop for his girlfriend,” an insider says.
(And some things are better left unsaid)
★Prince Harry says he recently sought therapy after suffering a near breakdown.  In an interview, the royal revealed just how difficult it was for him to admit that he had been hurting for nearly two decades after his mother, Princess Diana’s death in 1997. Harry says that he didn’t really get a chance to deal with his grief, resulting in him feeling “very close to a complete breakdown on numerous occasions.”  Eventually, he decided to open up and seek help with the encouragement of his family and is now in a much better place. He also took up boxing to help cope. Now, he’s using his position to let others know that they shouldn’t feel ashamed of doing the same.
★Ben Affleck is reportedly ‘dating someone’ and ‘ready to move on’ following his failed marriage to Jennifer Garner.  The Hollywood couple announced its split in June 2015, but had not filed court papers to legally put an end to the marriage, prompting speculation the actors were headed for a reconciliation. No word yet on who the lucky lady is.

•“Jimmy Kimmel” (ABC/Global): Julia Louis-Dreyfus, Kevin Nealon
“Jimmy Fallon” (NBC/CTV): Sienna Miller, Anthony Bourdain, Chris Cornell
“Stephen Colbert” (CBS/Global): Rose Byrne, Lewis Black, PJ Harvey
“Seth Meyers” (NBS/CTV): Kristen Bell, Bill Nighy, Aquilo (R)
“James Corden” (CBS/CTV): Adam Sandler, Kevin James
“Conan” (TBS/Comedy): Deon Cole, X Ambassadors
“The View” (ABC/CTV): Sen. Elizabeth Warren, Julian Lennon
“Live with Kelly” (ABC/CTV): Rose Byrne, Bella Thorne, guest co-host Jussie Smollett
“Ellen DeGeneres” (NBC/CTV): Magic Johnson, Nicole Richie, Travis Scott
“Survivor” [CBS/Global] “There’s a New Sheriff in Town”  The merge brings another twist, leaving two castaways out of the celebratory feast.

• Prince – his death scene was riddled with pills strewn around his home, according to search warrants just released by Minnesota authorities.  Law enforcement found Ziploc bags and envelopes containing pills. Some, including the painkiller oxycodone, had been prescribed to Prince in the days before he died under the name of his friend to protect  Prince’s privacy. His bodyguard was the person who went to a Walgreens pharmacy the day preceding the singer’s death to fill prescriptions, including Percocet.
•Drake accused The Madison Club near Coachella of racial profiling, prompting his fans to trash the establishment.  Drake took to Instagram to slam club staff in their treatment of guests. According to the post, the club is “The most offensive place I have ever stayed at in my life with staff who pick and choose who they are going to accommodate based on racial profiling.
•Melissa Etheridge – says that she smokes weed with her kids.  In a new interview, she opened up about smoking marijuana recreationally, medicinally and with her eldest children.  While she admits it was strange the first time she sparked a joint with Bailey, 20, and Beckett, 18, she says she’d rather have a smoke with her kids than a drink.
•Willie Nelson – has pulled together an all-star lineup for the second annual Outlaw Music Festival, but the event won’t simply be a one-off thing in 2017. This year, the festival is going on tour, and joining the Red Headed Stranger for six shows over two weeks is a genre-defying roster of artists, including Jason Isbell, Bob Dylan and a host of other well-known acts.
•Lady Gaga – will star with Bradley Cooper in ‘A Star is Born’ Remake.  Gaga, who will go by her legal name Stefani Germanotta in the film’s credits, stars in the story of an up-and-coming starlet who struggles to break into the entertainment world with guidance from an industry veteran on the way down.  Sam Elliot and Andrew Dice Clay are also set to star in the remake, which will be Cooper’s directorial debut.
•Billy Joel – was joined onstage by Kevin Spacey to sing ‘New York State of Mind’ at Madison Square Garden.  The two have a history.  They sang ‘Piano Man’ together when Joel was awarded the Gershwin Prize of Popular Song in 2014.
•Journey – Guitarist Neil Schon says he hopes to record with former singer Steve Perry in the future.  He says they had a great time hanging out backstage at this month’s Rock and Roll Hall of Fame induction ceremony and if they do record something, it won’t necessarily be Journey music.  Quote: “Something more bluesy more R&B-ish, soul”.
•Night Ranger – drummer/singer Kelly Keagy has announced that he has undergone a successful heart procedure and will now be taking a six week leave of absence from the group to recover.The drummer and vocalist will be sitting out the band’s upcoming spring dates for their 35th Anniversary World Tour and the band have recruited Cinderella’s Fred Coury to play the dates this month, with former Journey drummer Deen Castronovo taking over drum duties next month.
(But who is gonna sing??)

With the news last week that a newly discovered species of shrimp has been named after Pink Floyd (Synalpheus pinkfloydi), here are some other pop and rock stars who have had the honor:
•Beyonce – Scaptia beyonceae (big-butted horsefly)
•David Bowie – Heteropoda davidbowie (spider)
•Bob Marley – Gnathia marleyi (blood-sucking parasite) (!!)
•Shakira – Aleiodes shakirae (wasp)
•Mick Jagger – Jaggermeryx naida (extinct  hippo)
•Ozzy Osbourne – Dendropsophus ozzyi (bat-voiced frog)
(Does this prove that scientists are really a bunch of hippies?)
-The Guardian

If you have ever wondered how it is that soap makes things clean, here is the answer, straight from a scientist who was kind enough to dumb it down so I could understand it:
-Most of the things we try to clean are infused with oil. Water alone cannot wash this off.
-Thousands of years ago, people figured out how to make a substance that overcame the deep antagonism between oil and water: a fatty acid from a cow or sheep and mixed  with water and  ashes to get dirt and oil to wash away.
-Now, of course, we make this substance out of purified oils and things to look and smell much nicer, but it is still the same product: soap.  And its basic purpose is still the same as well: to remove oils by working with water to lift particles up and suspend them in the water while additional water washes it away.
(Except thousands of years ago, the soap smelled so bad that you could never give it as a shower gift).
(They managed to stay clean 10,000 years ago, and I can’t  keep my kid clean beyond early recess!)
(Could the fact that I am washing with a ‘fatty acid’ explain my waistline problem?)


There’s a moment in every job when you realize you’ve reached your limit. Whether it’s due to burnout, boredom, or a generally bad fit, you’ll eventually get to a point where you’ve simply been doing the same thing for too long and wake up one day and know that it is time to pack it in.
According to career coaches Kate Bagoy and Rebecca Thompson, here are the Signs You’ve Been in Your Job for Too Long:
1. You’re counting your sick days.  You always know how many you have left, and consider using some of them just to take a ‘me’ day.  (Sick of working?)
2. You feel like all your creativity has been drained.   (Note: this does not apply to accountants.  Creative accounting is frowned upon.)
3. You’ve stopped participating in other aspects of your life.  (Sorry, honey, I can’t make it to the family reunion.  I’ve got a date with the couch…)
4. You’re dreaming of leaving your high-paying job for one at minimum-wage.  (Hey, at least they supply my work uniform!)
5. You’ve exhausted your opportunities for growth.  (About 13 years ago…)
6. You aren’t getting promoted.  (Take the hint…)
7. You can tell your performance is slipping.  (Well, they didn’t promote me, so…)
8.  You’re on autopilot.  (Esp. If you are a pilot)
9. You want to get fired.  (Yup.  Pretty strong sign…)
(#10: You can’t be bothered to come up with a Number 10)

•The spray WD-40 got its name because there were forty attempts needed before the creation of the “water displacing” substance.
•Contrary to popular belief, chocolate does not cause acne.
•Rabbits can live up to ten years.
•The last thing Elvis Presley ate before he died was four scoops of ice cream and 6 chocolate chip cookies.
•Over 250 million Slinky toys have been sold since its debut in 1946.
•Some Chinese chopsticks contain gold as on of their materials.
•The chances of making two holes-in-one in a round of golf are one in 67 million.
•For every hour that you run, you live an average of 7 extra hours.
(Unless you run and smoke…)
–, Shape


1946 [71] Tim Curry, Grappenhall England, movie actor (“Rocky Horror Picture Show”, Pennywise the clown in the movie “It”)
1968 [49] Ashley Judd, Granada Hills CA, TV actress (“Missing” 2012)/movie actress (“Divine Secrets Of the Ya-Ya Sisterhood”)/daughter of country singer Naomi Judd, sister of Wynonna
1978 [39] James Franco, Palo Alto CA, movie actor (“127 Hours”, “Pineapple Express”)
1979 [38] Kate Hudson, LA CA, movie actress (“Kung Foo Panda 3″, “Almost Famous”)/actress Goldie Hawn’s daughter/former partner of Muse frontman Matthew Bellamy
1981 [36] Hayden Christensen, Vancouver BC, movie actor (“Jumper”, “Star Wars: Episode II-III”)
1987 [30] Maria Sharapova, Nyagan, Russia, admitted doper/former top-ranked women’s tennis player/one-time highest-paid female athlete thanks to endorsement deals

•“Amaretto Day”,  Amaretto in Italian means “a little bitter” and is made from bitter almonds or apricot kernels or both. The nuts are infused in pure alcohol or brandy resulting in a strong almond flavor.
•“Garlic Day”, saluting the ‘stinking rose’ that has been cultivated as long as history has been recorded. It’s been said that if you rub a clove of garlic on your partner’s feet at night, you’ll taste it on their breath the next morning. Why you’d actually want to do this, no one knows.
•“Hanging Out Day”,  an initiative of Project Laundry List promoting energy conservation by using a clothesline instead of an electric dryer.  NET:
[Thurs] Cheddar Fries Day
[Thurs] High Five Day
[Fri] Day Of Silence
This Week…Boys and Girls Club Week
This Month…Inventor’s Month

2001 [16] The smash hit musical “The Producers”, based on the Mel Brooks film of the same name, opens on Broadway in NYC

2012 [05] Musician Levon Helm (The Band) dies of cancer in NYC at age 71; musician-songwriter Greg Ham (Men at Work) dies of unknown cases at age 58 in Carlton North, Australia

2014 [03] The White House in Washington DC refuses to comment on a campaign to deport Justin Bieber back to Canada after some 275,000 people sign a petition lambasting his behaviour

2005 [12] Cardinal Joseph Ratzinger is elected Pope Benedict XVI (quits February 28, 2013)

2014 [03] Chinese auto manufacturer FAW Group begins taking orders for its luxury Red Flag L5 custom-made auto, priced similarly to a Ferrari at approximately $800,000


• If you lose your hearing, is it ear replaceable?
• Why is it as soon as you’re doing what you want to be doing, you want to be doing something else?
• If you keep you eye on the ball, your shoulder to the wheel, your nose to the grindstone, your feet on the ground and your head on your shoulders, how the hell are you supposed too get anything DONE?
• How come the severity of an itch is inversely proportional to your ability to reach it?
• Do bald people ever have ‘bad head days’?
• How come when you see a married couple walking down the street, the one that’s a few steps ahead is the one that’s angry?
• How do you throw away a garbage can?

☎What do you miss most about being a kid?

Have someone take their pick from each pairing:
•Would you rather always be 10 minutes late or always be 20 minutes early?
•Would you rather your shirts be always two sizes too big or one size too small?
•Would you rather be alone for the rest of your life or always be surrounded by annoying people?
•Would you rather never use social media again or never watch another movie or TV show?
•Would you rather have an easy job working for someone else or be self-employed but work incredibly hard?
•Would you rather have horrible short term memory or horrible long term memory?
•Would you rather be completely invisible for one day or be able to fly for one day?

They told me I was gullible…and I believed them!

Question: According to a survey, the average person replaces THIS every 10 years. What is it?
A: Their vacuum!

Opportunity does not knock.  It presents itself when you beat down the door.

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