Wednesday, April 5, 2017        Edition: #5947

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BS SHOW BIZ BUZZ:
★Rupert Sanders has called his affair with Kristen Stewart a ”momentary lapse”.  The married ‘Snow White and the Huntsman’ director had an affair with the 26-year-old actress – who was dating Robert Pattinson at the time – on the set of the 2012 movie but he has now branded their dalliance as a ”mistake”. (You expected him to say it WASN’T a mistake?)
-Contact Music
★John Stamos helped a California director propose to his girlfriend after learning the woman was a huge fan of the TV hunk.  The Full House star was contacted by Doug Cox as he planned to pop the question to his lady Katrina Firenze, and in a humorous email, the filmmaker explained how her undying love for Stamos had made him feel like a second-rate choice for years.  Stamos responded with a video message including the kind words: ‘“Katrina, I would say yes to this. If I was a woman, and I’m not saying I’m not, I would say yes to Doug. So I guess this is me asking you to marry him.” She said yes.
-People.com
★ Some are saying that Kim Kardashian’s plan to for a new addition to the family was a shameless ratings plot cooked up at the last minute.  In Sunday’s episode, the 36-year-old wife of rapper Kanye West and mother of North, 3, and Saint West, 1, claimed that she is considering surrogacy to have another child. But an insider says it was all for show.  (Shameless? Kim?  Couldn’t be…)
-Radar Online
★ Olivia Wilde is making the leap from screen to stage. The 33-year-old actress is set to make her Broadway debut in the stage adaptation of George Orwell’s dystopian novel 1984 in May. The New York City native will star alongside Tony nominee Tom Sturridge and Tony winner Reed Barry.
-HelloMagazine.com

TODAY’S SHOW BIZ SKED:
“Jimmy Kimmel Live” (ABC/City):  Eric Stonestreet
“Tonight Show With Jimmy Fallon” (NBC, CTV):  Dwayne Johnson, Nicole Richie, Flo Rida featuring 99 Percent
“The Late Show With Stephen Colbert” (CBS/Global): Sigourney Weaver, Jon Favreau, Jon Lovett, a special appearance by Steve Martin
“Late Late Show With James Corden (CBS, CTV): Demi Lovato, Charlie Hunnam
“The View” (ABC, CTV): Helen Hunt
“Ellen DeGeneres” (NBC, CTV): Justin Theroux, Demi Lovato, Ed Sheeran
•“Survivor” (CBS, Global):  A castaway is left on Exile Island after a tribe switch; the exiled castaway receives a visit.
•”Major League Baseball” Go ahead, you’ll find it…everywhere!

BS MUSIC NOTES:
•Jon Bon Jovi – has announced a contest that will end with the rocker and his band crashing a college graduation.  With two kids of his own graduating college this year, he and his band have invited college seniors to try for a chance to have Bon Jovi perform and speak at their graduation by sharing their best college moments on Twitter using the hashtag #JBJReunionContest.
•Lady Antebellum – have revealed some more details for their forthcoming studio album, which will be entitled “Heart Break” and is set to hit stores on June 9th. Hillary Scott says that they wrote the title song while on their first band trip to Florida.  That felt so good that they decided to live together in rented houses in Florida and California for the entire creative process of the new album.
•RaeLynn – She had a very special date for the 2017 ACM Awards on Sunday night: The “Love Triangle” singer brought her father.  Normally, RaeLynn’s awards show date would be her husband, Josh Davis, but Davis couldn’t  attend this year because he recently joined the military.
•Harry Styles – The former One Direction star has revealed details about his forthcoming debut solo single along with the artwork for the track via an Instagram post.  The boybander uploaded the cover art and revealed that the track will be entitled “Sign Of The Times” and will be released on Friday.
•Beatles – June 1 marks the 50th anniversary of the classic “Sgt. Pepper” album.  The planned remastered anniversary edition includes two songs, ‘Strawberry Fields Forever’ and ‘Penny Lane,’  which were intended for the album, but released as a double-sided single instead.  Late producer George Martin once said that not including the 2 songs on the album was a ‘terrible mistake’.
•Journey – Former singer Steve Perry is a question mark for Journey’s Friday’s Rock and Roll Hall of Fame induction, but he loves to show up for ballgames.  He is such an ardent fan of his hometown San Francisco Giants that some are calling him the west coast version of the Cubs’ Bill Murray.  (Maybe offer him ball tickets if he will come to the RRHOF party?)

CARTOON  LAWS:
* Everything falls faster than an anvil.
* When poked (usually in the buttocks) with a sharp object (usually a pin), a character will defy gravity by shooting straight up.
* Any body passing through solid matter will leave a cookie-cutout hole conforming to its exact shape.
* The time required for an object to fall 20 stories is equal to the time it takes for a character to spiral down 20 flights to catch it.
* Certain bodies can pass through solid walls painted to resemble tunnel entrances; others cannot.
* Explosive weapons cannot cause fatal injuries. They merely turn characters temporarily black and smoky.
* Any body suspended in air will remain there until made aware of its situation.
*  A cat will assume the shape of its container.

ZIT NEEDLE:
Medical scientists say that incidence of adult acne is increasing every year. And no one really knows why. The fact that scientists don’t know the exact cause of acne explains why there’s no real cure for a skin condition that so many have.  But things are starting to look up. An acne vaccine that would change the way we approach skin care forever is in the works. Imagine an entire generation that doesn’t know what it’s like to touch up concealer before meetings, pray that a new medication will finally clear up their skin, or wake up to scars from past breakouts?
So far, the test vaccine has worked on skin biopsies and the next step is to try it on test subjects.
(Caution: side effects include skin blemishes and acne breakouts)
-Allure

SHARKNADO:
An Australian journalist was shocked to find a dead bull shark in a puddle while covering flooding from Cyclone Debbie.  Because the puddle was located inland in the town of Ayr, the only logical conclusion is that it was swept to the area by the cyclone, similar what happened to thousands of sharks in the delightfully cheesy C-movie ‘Sharknado’.  The reporter claims that the shark is the talk of the town and many locals are coming out to ‘touch’ it. (Watch out for sequels!)
-AP

NOT SO FAST:
Amazon.com is delaying the opening of its futuristic cashierless grocery store because of technical difficulties.  The store, called Amazon Go, uses computers and cameras to detect what’s in your cart and automatically charge your Amazon account so you can leave the store without ever taking out your wallet.  But Amazon Go isn’t quite ready for primetime. The technology is having trouble keeping track of more than 20 people at a time. Right now, things only run smoothly when there are just a few customers in the store.   Amazon has been testing the store at its campus in Seattle.  Plans were to open this year.  (No checkout?  But who will break my eggs for me?)
– Business Insider

BS CHRONOMETER 04.05.17

TODAY’S CELEBIRTHDAYS . . .

1950 [67] Agnetha Fältskog, Jönköping, Sweden, singer (ABBA-“Waterloo”, “Dancing Queen”)

1966 [51] Mike McCready, Pensacola FL, rock guitarist (Pearl Jam-“Jeremy”, “Last Kiss”)

1967 [50] Troy Gentry, Lexington KY, country singer (Montgomery Gentry-”Roll With Me”, “Back When I Knew It All”)

1973 [44] Pharrell Williams, Virginia Beach VA, pop artist (“Happy”, w/Robin Thicke-”Blurred Lines”)/music producer (Gwen Stefani, Jay-Z, Nelly, Usher, etc)/TV personality (“The Voice” since 2014-16)

1981 [36] Mike Eli, Denton TX, country singer-guitarist (Eli Young Band-”Drunk Last Night”, “Crazy Girl”)

1982 [35] Hayley Atwell, London UK, TV actress (‘Peggy Carter’ in “Marvel’s Agent Carter” since 2015)

1989 [28] Lily James, Esher UK, TV actress (‘Lady Rose Aldridge’ on “Downton Abbey” 2012-2015)/movie actress (“Cinderella”)

TODAY’S BS REASONS TO PARTY . . .
• “Dandelion Day”, No one is really sure why, no one is really sure who came up with it, but it is Dandelion Day.  So rub one under someone’s chin and mourn the fact that Crayola has retired the ‘dandelion’ crayon!

• “Deep Dish Pizza Day”, celebrating the creation of Chicago’s Uno Chicago Grill, which opened in 1943. Why deep dish? Because you can’t possibly get enough fat-laden cheese and sausage onto a regular pie in order to cause immediate cardiac arrest.

• “Go For Broke Day”, a day to throw caution to the wind and go all out, give it all you’ve got, don’t hold back, give it all or nothing, start giving 110%, let ‘er rip, balls to the wall!

• “Road Map Day”, the highlight of “Reading a Road Map Week”, which promotes map reading as an ‘enjoyable pastime’ and survival skill. Who reads the map or GPS during your family trips?

•“Bell Bottoms Day”, you’ll notice this is NOT held in conjunction with “Ride Your Bike Day”.

THIS DAY IN SHOW BIZ . . .
1987 [30] FOX TV network debuts, originally offering just 2 Sunday night programs: “Married … With Children” (runs 10 years); “Tracey Ullman Show” (original platform for “The Simpsons”)

2008 [09] Movie icon Charlton Heston (“Ben-Hur”) dies at age 84 in Beverly Hills CA

TODAY’S MUSIC EVENTS . . .
2002 [15] Grunge rocker Layne Staley of Alice in Chains dies at age 34 of a suspected drug overdose

2011 [06] A statue in tribute to Nirvana singer Kurt Cobain is unveiled in his hometown of Aberdeen WA on the 17th anniversary of his 1994 death via suicide

TODAY’S FIRSTS . . .
1993 [24] 1st female PA announcer at a Major League Baseball park (Sherry Davis wins the San Francisco Giants job over 499 others who audition)

2008 [09] Apple’s iTunes overtakes Walmart to become the largest music retailer

TODAY’S RECORD . . .
2000 [17] ‘Loudest Burp’ on record, according to “Guinness Book of Records” (Paul Hunn lets one fly that registers 118.1 decibels, the equivalent of sitting in the front row at a rock concert)

AND REMEMBER . . .
[Thurs] Drowsy Driver Awareness Day / Twinkie Day / Alcohol Screening Day / Tartan Day
[Fri] Metric System Day / Beer Day / Walk to Work Day / No Housework Day

BULL’S BITS

NATIONAL GEOGRAPHIC ARTICLES IN THE YEAR 2030:

✓Hey, Remember Forests? I Miss Forests

✓These Striking Photographs Show the Best On-Fire Lakes from Around the World

✓Did Lemurs Have Personalities? If So, Were They Bummed Out When They Became Extinct?

✓95 Degrees Fahrenheit in December — Is This the Coldest Winter in Years?

✓Five Ways the U.S. Environmental Protection Agency Should Use Its $400 Budget

✓This Photojournalist Spent a Week Following the Band of Violent Bikers Who Now Rule Us, But He Was Killed So We Didn’t Receive Any Photos from Him

✓Recycling: Get Caught and This Illegal Activity Will Get You Thrown in Jail

✓Seven Stunning Natural Wonders That Are Now Trump Hotels

✓Help Us Caption This Photo of Underwater New York City

✓Photo of the Day: The Last Ice Cube on Earth

BS RANDOM JOKE:

I don’t believe in astrology. But then I’m an Aquarius, and Aquarians don’t believe in astrology.

BS PHONE STARTER:

☎If you were a professional baseball player, what would be your walk-up song?

BS WATER COOLER QUESTION:

Question:  52% of college students have done THIS in the past week. What is it?
Answer: Drank an energy drink!

BS DEEP THOUGHT:

When all men think alike, no one thinks very much.


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