Tuesday, August 10, 2004        Edition: #2841
Get Your BS Here, Hot ‘n Fresh!

BS SHOW BIZ BUZZ:
Barbra Streisand claimed she missed the Democratic National Convention because she was working on the set of “Meet the Fockers” (long in the can), but now word has leaked that organizers told her take a hike after she made outlandish demands for makeup artists, hairdressers, extra bodyguards, a fleet of limos & hotel suites for her entire entourage – all at the party’s expense . . . A judge in Aspen CO has ordered former “Miami Vice” star Don Johnson to pay an overdue grocery store tab close to $6,000, but good luck collecting – he’s already filed for bankruptcy . . . Rosie O’Donnell will co-produce an HBO documentary about R Family Vacations, her gay-family cruise company which hosted 500 same-sex families on its maiden voyage . . . Tom Cruise is renting not 1, not 2, but 3 luxury villas in Berlin, Germany for the shooting of “Mission Impossible 3” at a cost of over $350,000 . . . Despite risque trysts in stores, cars, bathrooms & beaches, “Spider-Man” actress Kirsten Dunst says her relationship with actor Jake Gyllenhaal just couldn’t last because he’s a ‘stay-at-home boy’ and she’s an ‘out-on-the-town girl’ . . . Meantime, “Lost In Translation” hottie Scarlett Johansson has reportedly asked to be set up for a date with Jake Gyllenhaal because friends tell her they’re perfectly matched . . . Carmen Harra, a NYC psychic who has worked with newlywed Jennifer Lopez, tells “Us Weekly” she thinks J-Lo will meet another guy in about a year . . . And never-rich-enough Donald Trump is launching his own line of high-end men’s wear, the ‘Trump Signature Collection‘, that will include suits, coats, slacks, and possibly golf gear (but hopefully not hairpieces).

BS MUSIC NOTES:
• Faith Hill – THIS WEEK she’s performing 4 shows at the Colosseum at Caesars Palace in Las Vegas: TONIGHT, tomorrow, Friday & Saturday.
• Beastie Boys – TONIGHT they’re on “Late Show With David Letterman”.
• Whitney Houston – She’s one of the producers of the movie sequel “ Princess Diaries 2: Royal Engagement” (opening TOMORROW) and took her 11-year-old daughter Bobbi to the world premiere at Disneyland on the weekend.
• Nelly Furtado – TODAY she does daytime TV talk show “On Air With Ryan Seacrest”.
• U2 – Bono tells “LA Times” if he wasn’t a rock star he probably would have made a living as a speechwriter for causes he believes in. He also admits, however, that he doesn’t think some of his song lyrics are very good.

TODAY’S VIDEO RELEASES:
• “Kill Bill – Volume 2″ (Action – DVD/VHS): In part 2 of writer-director Quentin Tarantino’s “Kill Bill” saga, ‘The Bride’ (Uma Thurman) confronts the remaining foes on her death list – ‘Budd’ (Michael Madsen), ‘Elle Driver’ (Daryl Hannah) and ‘Bill’ himself (David Carradine), whom she tracks to his lair in Mexico.
• “The Prince & Me” (Romantic Comedy – DVD): Julia Stiles plays a girl from Wisconsin whose dream is to become a doctor. While studying medicine she meets the Crown Prince of Denmark  (Luke Malby) who is posing as a typical college student to escape his royal obligations. Predictably, they fall in love and she must choose between two possibilities for her future.
• “Johnson Family Vacation” (Comedy – DVD/VHS): Cedric the Entertainer sets out with his dissatisfied wife (Vanessa L Williams), 3 unruly kids (Bow Wow, Solange Knowles, Gabby Soleil) and 1 imaginary dog on a cross-country trek from California to Missouri for the ‘Johnson’ family’s annual reunion/grudge match. Hijinks ensue.
• “National Lampoon’s Dorm Daze” (Teen Comedy – DVD): Chris Owens & Tatyana Ali star in this risque comedy set in a co-ed dormitory where one student hires a hooker named ‘Dominique’ so his brother can lose his virginity while another awaits the arrival of a French foreign exchange student also named ‘Dominique’. Hmm, wonder what happens?
• Also out on DVD TODAY – “The Conan O’Brien 10th Anniversary Special” and “The Best of Triumph the Insult Comic Dog” (voiced by Robert Smigel).

TOP VIDEO RENTALS:
1. “Starsky & Hutch”
2. “The Butterfly Effect”
3. “Confessions of a Teenage Drama Queen”
– “Billboard”

GOOFY GIZMOS & GADGETS:
• Mexican restaurant Diego in Las Vegas’ MGM Grand Hotel is serving up ‘margarita pops’. Yep, it’s a drink on a stick, in the form of a popsicle, served in a salt-rimmed margarita glass. (I’ve been making ‘beer pops’ for years – every time I forget I stuck a bottle in the freezer to chill.)
• Australian scientists have developed a wallpaper that blocks cellphone signals. Constructed from a metallic grid, it’s being touted as a hi-tech security device. (They could also use some over at the cineplex!)
• The new ‘Laser Comb’ from Hair Max purportedly uses ‘phototherapy’ to make men’s hair thicker and fuller. The inventor claims it’s a ‘progressive, non-invasive restorative solution’. (Translation: a new way to take advantage of insecure balding guys.)

BARITONE’S BETTER AT BEDTIME:
According to a survey of families, when it comes to hearing bedtime stories, deep male tones are preferred by both children and adults. Women’s voices are often perceived as less likely to aid restful sleep. (When it comes to singing lullabies, however, “I want Mommy!”)
– “London Observer”

DOG DAYS OF SUMMER:
Thousands of dogs die every year from heatstroke. The most common causes are leaving a pooch chained in the yard without adequate shade and water, and leaving an animal in a closed vehicle. Animals with short or pug noses are more susceptible than long-nosed pets, and larger animals have a harder time cooling themselves than small ones. Even a small amount of exercise during the middle of a hot summer day can be too much for your pet. (Not to mention you.)
– “Palm Beach Post”

THE NAIL-ON STAMP:
Swiss Post, which in the past has released scratch-and-sniff chocolate-scented stamps and stamps made of lace, has launched another unusual commemorative stamp, this one made of wood. The new stamp celebrates Switzerland’s lumber industry and is made from small squares of 120-year-old pines that are cut roughly the thickness of a credit card. The wooden stamps go on sale at Swiss Post offices SEPTEMBER 7th, but collectors can already buy them online.
– CNEWS
NET: http://www.post.ch (Click ‘English’ in top right corner)

DO A SIT-UP:
According to researchers from Southwest Missouri State University, numerous short exercise sessions are more beneficial than rigorous workouts. Researchers claim that several short, moderate- to high-intensity exercise sessions are more effective at lowering triglyceride blood levels than one long workout. After a high-fat meal, prolonged elevations in triglycerides, a type of blood fat, can increase the risk of heart disease. (Let’s see, this morning I went down the stairs. That’s 1 …)
– ANI

LOOSEN YOUR LEVIS:
Warning, warning! Now tight jeans are dangerous! It might be stylish to squeeze into skin-tight jeans, but doctors say you could pay a painful price later. Wearing snug jeans puts pressure on the cutaneous nerve which runs from the lower spinal cord to the thigh. That can cause inflammation and extreme pain. (I once got ‘inflammation’ from skin-tight jeans … on Angelina Jolie.)
– HealthNet

HOLLYWOOD’S BIGGEST HEARTBREAKERS:
1. Lenny Kravitz
2. Paris Hilton
3. Matthew Perry
4. Jennifer Love Hewitt
5. George Clooney
– “In Touch” magazine poll.

BEST ALL-TIME MOVIE SOUNDTRACKS:
1. “The Blues Brothers”
2. “Pulp Fiction”
3. “Trainspotting”
4. “Saturday Night Fever “
5. “Dirty Dancing”
– BBC Radio poll.

BS AMAZING FACT:
Pound for pound, an eagle’s wing is stronger than the wing of an airplane.

THE BULL SHEET 08.10.2K4

TODAY’S CELEBIRTHDAYS . . .
1949 [55] Gene Johnson, Jamestown NY, country singer (Diamond Rio-“Can’t You Tell”, “One More Day”)

1959 [45] Rosanna Arquette, NYC, movie actress (“Whole Nine Yards”, “Pulp Fiction”)/lived in Europe with Peter Gabriel from 1992-98/sister of actors David Arquette & Patricia Arquette

1960 [44] Antonio Banderas, Malaga, Spain, movie actor (“Shrek 2″, “Spy Kids 1-3D”, “The Mask of Zorro”)/Mr Melanie Griffith since 1996  COMING UP: The sequel “Legend of Zorro”, due in 2005.

1973 [31] Jennifer Hanson, La Habra CA, country singer (“Beautiful Goodbye”)

BS REASONS TO PARTY . . .
TODAY is “International S’Mores Day” celebrating one of our favorite campfire treats. Here’s the complicated directions – toast marshmallows over campfire, then place them on graham cracker with piece of chocolate. Take second graham cracker and smush it on top. Inhale.

TODAY is “Spoil Your Dog Day” … like is there some other option?

TODAY’S MUSIC EVENT . . .
1985 [19] 1st solo album by female artist to sell 5 million copies (Madonna’s “Like a Virgin”)

TODAY’S FIRSTS . . .
1889 [115] 1st ‘screw cap’ (and first skin is ripped from a frustrated consumer’s hand)

1876 [128] 1st ‘long distance call’ (Alexander Graham Bell calls Paris … Paris, Ontario that is, from nearby Brantford)

COMING UP . . .
[Wed] Dog Days of Summer end
[Wed] 2004 Teen Choice Awards on FOX-TV
[Thurs] Middle Children’s Day
[Fri] Friday the 13th
[Fri] International Left-Handers Day
[Fri-Aug 29] Games of the XXVIII Olympiad
This Week Is . . . Scrabble Week
This Month Is . . . Admit You’re Happy Month

BULL’S BITS . . .
MORE BS QUESTIONS PLAGUING HUMANITY:     
  
• Why couldn’t Willie Nelson have waited to die before he began decomposing?
• Is it better to sleep ‘like a log’ or ‘like a baby’?
• How come peanut butter always gets top billing over jelly?
• What’s the shelf life of a shelf?
• Do mealworms ever just snack?
• If you’re halfway from here to there, which is which?
• What do atheists say when someone sneezes?
• When cowboys and Indians smoked the peace pipe, what did they do for munchies?

BS BALDERDASH:
What do the following words mean?
• ‘Baggit’ (BAG-it)
a. A full grown female salmon that has already spawned. [CORRECT]
b. A partially grown palm tree.
c. A small purse used by a fully grown woman.

• ‘Leefang’ (LEE-fang)
a. The scientific term for mulched leaves.
b. A Chinese delicacy made from pigeons.
c. A rope used in the rigging of a ship. [CORRECT]

• ‘Omphalos’ (AHM-fah-luss)
a. A process used to remove tattoos.
b. A fancy word for ‘belly button’. [CORRECT]
c. The ancient Greek city that first hosted the Olympic Games.

BS BLATANT JOKES:
• I found a way to keep that new car smell. Every week I buy a new car.
• Necessity is the mother of strange bedfellows.

BS WATER COOLER QUESTION:
Today’s Question: Women do THIS 5.2 times per day more than men.
Answer to Give Out Next Show: Apologize.

BS DEEP THOUGHT:
The early worm gets devoured by the early bird.

We’re always interested in your feedback. E-mail us at Bullmail@TheBullSheet.com


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