Tuesday, August 15, 2017 – Edition: #6034
Sheeters Always Prosper!
BS SHOW BIZ BUZZ:
★ Tom Cruise was injured during a building-jumping stunt on the set of “Mission Impossible 6.” The 55-year-old actor, who is known for doing many of his own stunts, was shooting in London when he attempted to leap from a rigging onto a building but fell short of the mark and hit the building. According to witnesses, Cruise tried to limp away and then collapsed. He was then pulled away by the safety team. No official word yet on the extent of his injuries.
-TMZ
★ Tim Roth says Quentin Tarantino should be the guy to direct the next James Bond film. Roth thinks his ‘Hateful Eight’ director – who is for known plenty of violence in his films – would make the ”goriest” installment ever in the spy series but he believes it would also have the sharpest script. According to Roth: ”So often Quentin is not given credit for how important he is visually as a filmmaker. He invented his own language. No one writes like he does. It is always magic.”
(And speaking of language, it would also probably be the most profane Bond yet!)
-ContactMusic
★ Robert Pattinson went behind bars for his new movie, ‘Good Time’. To prepare for his role as Connie Nikas, a Queens hood who robs banks and watches over his mentally challenged brother, Pattinson spent time in several New York jails, including Manhattan’s Metropolitan Correctional Center, in character.
(Or he could have just asked Robert Downey Jr. about it!)
-PageSix
★ Broadway star Okieriete “Oak” Onaodowan has dedicated his final performance in ‘Natasha, Pierre & the Great Comet of 1812′ to Heather Heyer, the 32-year-old woman who was killed Saturday when a driver plowed his car into a crowd of counter-protestors after a white nationalist rally in Charlottesville, Virginia. On Sunday, Onaodowan tweeted, “#HeatherHeyer My last show is in honor of u. I sing 4 u today, I weep 4 u today, on behalf of this nation, I ask to wake up for u today.”
-EW
★ Shonda Rhimes — the creator of “Grey’s Anatomy,” “Scandal” and “How to Get Away with Murder” — will take her ‘ShondaLand’ production team to Netflix in a multi-year deal. It’s unclear how much Netflix paid to swoop her away from ABC, but she’ll certainly be getting more than she was getting at the Disney-owned company. Rhimes is the latest producer to bail from broadcast TV to Netflix. Chuck Lorre, the brainchild behind “Two and a Half Men” and “Big Bang Theory,” and Jenji Kohan, the creator of “Orange is the New Black” and “Weeds” did the same.
-TMZ
★ John Heard has been buried next to his tragic son Max. The ‘Home Alone’ star passed away last month in his hotel room in Palo Alto, California. And now he has been laid to rest in a plot at the Lady Of Hope Church in Massachusetts, beside his son Max who died at 22 following an overdose in December 2016. John Heard’s cause is death is still unclear but police aren’t treating it as suspicious.
-ContactMusic
TODAY’S SHOW BIZ SKED:
• “Jimmy Kimmel Live” (ABC/Global): Floyd Mayweather, Chrissy Metz, Charles Gould
• “The Tonight Show starring Jimmy Fallon” (NBC/CTV): Keegan-Michael Key, Leslie Jones, A$AP Mob
• “The Late Show with Stephen Colbert” (CBS/Global): Daniel Craig, Tiffany Haddish, Blackberry Smoke
• “Late Night with Seth Meyers” (NBC/CTV): Adam Driver, Marlon Wayans, Anthony Atamanuik, Roy Mayorga
• “The Late Late Show with James Corden” (CBS/CTV): Lin-Manuel Miranda, Nikolaj Coster-Waldau, Samuel L. Jackson
• “Last Call with Carson Daly” (NBC/CTV): Briga Heelan, Ethan Gruska, Moshe Kasher ( R )
• “The Daily Show with Trevor Noah” (Comedy): Pre-empted
• “Conan” (TBS/Comedy): Chris Gethard
• “Watch What Happens Live” (Bravo): “Below Deck Mediterranean” Reunion
• “The View” (ABC/CTV): Ariel Winter, Sherri Shepherd ( R )
• “The Talk” (CBS): Carl Reiner, Rob Reiner, Dr. Travis Stork ( R )
• “Live with Kelly and Ryan” (ABC/CTV): Jamie Foxx, Chrissy Metz, Derek Hough
• “The Ellen DeGeneres Show” (NBC/CTV): Nicki Minaj, Robin Wright ( R )
• “Wendy Williams” (FOX): Dave Mizejewski ( R )
• “Harry” (NBC/CTV): John Lithgow, Condola Rashad, Jacob Collier ( R )
• “The Real” (FOX): Tamera gives valuable advice to viewers ( R )
• “Bachelor in Paradise” (ABC): Season 3 alumni Carly and Evan get married; a production lapse hurts the momentum for some.
• “America’s Got Talent” (NBC): “Live Show 1” Twelve of the remaining 36 acts perform.
BS MUSIC NOTES:
• Fifth Harmony – their new self-titled album will be their most ‘raw’ yet. They are set to release their first LP since the departure of Camila Cabello in December, and say the lyrics are all based on their own experiences. ‘Fifth Harmony’ comes out August 25.
• Tupac Shakur – his 1996 Hummer is back up for sale after the winning bidder failed to come up with the cash. It was sold to an anonymous Ohio bidder in May 2016 for US$337,000.
• Sinead O’Connor – is heading back to hospital. In Facebook posts, she seemed upbeat on Saturday – then said that she was ‘totally destroyed’ and returning to hospital. She also wrote that “it’s so awful to be so crazy. A painful thing.”
• Louis Tomlinson – Simon Cowell once flew him to Los Angeles to scold him for being drunk on stage with One Direction. Tomlinson, who is signed to Simon’s record label for his solo career, admits that the incident made him and Simon closer and he believes it is one of the reasons they have such a good relationship now.
• Alice Cooper – kicked off his month-long co-headlining North American tour with Deep Purple at the Chelsea, the concert venue located inside the Cosmopolitan of Las Vegas.
• Tanya Tucker – has released a new song “Forever Loving You” in honor of Glen Campbell. A portion of the proceeds will benefit the Alzheimer’s Foundation of America. Tucker and Campbell had a turbulent relationship in the 1980s.
• Thomas Rhett – Just three months after bringing home his adopted daughter Willa Gray, he and his wife Lauren have officially welcomed their second child, also a girl. Ada James Akins was born on Saturday.
• Trace Adkins – says that he has nothing left on his bucket list. With a successful country career, regular acting gigs and after winning Celebrity Apprentice in 2013, he says, “If this thing ended today, I’d be content. I’ve had a great run.”
THIS WEEK’S VIDEO RELEASES:
• “Alien: Covenant” (R-Rated, Action/Adventure): The crew of a colony ship, bound for a remote planet, discover an uncharted paradise with a threat beyond their imagination, and must attempt a harrowing escape. (Michael Fassbender, Katherine Waterston, Billy Crudup)
• “The Case for Christ” (PG, Drama): An investigative journalist and self-proclaimed atheist sets out to disprove the existence of God after his wife becomes a Christian. (L. Scott Caldwell, Erika Christensen, Faye Dunaway)
• “How To Be a Latin Lover” (PG-13, Comedy): Finding himself dumped after 25 years of marriage, a man who made a career of seducing rich older women must move in with his estranged sister, where he begins to learn the value of family. (Eugenio Derbez, Salma Hayek, Raphael Alejandro)
• “Betting on Zero” (Not Rated, Documentary): Writer/director Ted Braun follows controversial hedge fund titan Bill Ackman as he puts a billion dollars on the line in his crusade to expose Herbalife as the largest pyramid scheme in history. (William Ackman)
• “Once Upon a Time in Venice” (Not Rated, Action/Adventure): A Los Angeles detective seeks out the ruthless gang that stole his dog. (Bruce Willis, John Goodman, Jason Momoa)
• “Blind” (R-Rated, Drama): A novelist blinded in a car crash which killed his wife rediscovers his passion for both life and writing when he embarks on an affair with the neglected wife of an indicted businessman. (Alec Baldwin, Demi Moore, Dylan McDermott)
THINGS YOU SHOULD NEVER DO IN FRONT OF THE QUEEN:
Should you ever get the chance to meet Her Majesty, there are certain things you shouldn’t do in order to observe protocol (and to not look like a peasant):
○ Don’t Touch – wait for her to extend her hand first. And even afterwards, contact should be kept to a minimum. That means hugs and kisses are a major no no. (Just ask Charles!)
○ You shouldn’t be sitting – As soon as the Queen enters the room, you must stand to greet her and should not sit down until she does. Only then is it polite to take a rest. (She’s 91. How long is she going to stand anyway?)
○ Don’t just stand there – Citizens of the Commonwealth must bow or curtsy. Residents of other countries can simply shake hands. (When Angelina Jolie met the Queen, she did a little of all three, because it’s better to be safe than sorry.)
○ Don’t show up casual – If there’s a dress code, follow it. And never, under any circumstances, show up in flip-flops, torn jeans or a revealing outfit. (Except in the rare occasion that Her Majesty has invited you to a frat party…)
○ Don’t show up without a gift – Bringing a gift is a must, but it should always be appropriate for the occasion. For instance, if the Queen visits your hometown, it’s common to give her something that is from there and indicative of your culture. (Now I know why Buckingham Palace is so big, she needs the storage space!)
○ Don’t use nicknames – Even though you might feel like you’ve known the Queen your whole life, remember: she doesn’t know you. When you first meet her, address her as “Your Majesty.” Use “Ma’am” the rest of the time, except when you say farewell, which should be “Your Majesty” again. (She does not appreciate either ‘Queenie’ or ‘Lizzie’.)
○ Don’t speak unless spoken to – When around the Queen, you should follow the same rule some people use for kids, which is “be seen and not heard.” This allows for the Queen to carry the conversation – or put it to a stop, if she so desires. (The benefits of power!)
○ Don’t lag behind – When walking with the Queen, keep the same pace as her. This ensures you’re alongside her and can introduce her as needed when moving from room to room. (Somehow I can’t imagine needing to know this…)
○ Don’t eat first – It’s customary that the Queen should take the first bite at the table and when she’s done eating, you should be too. (I’d do this anyway, because I’d have no idea which silver to use until she grabbed one!)
○ Don’t slurp your tea – Since tea is huge part of the British culture, you should drink it as the Queen does. Hold the tea cup, not the cup and saucer, when at the table, and never, ever slurp as you drink. (Gagging is probably not an option either?)
(There are actually a few other things I can think of that you probably shouldn’t do in front of the Queen. But I’ll leave that to your imagination!)
-Harper’s Bazaar
THE SOUND OF SILENCE…LITERALLY:
If you play music from your iPhone in the car, and you do it by plugging the phone into the USB port, you know the drill. The music starts up automatically, and it always THE SAME SONG! Playback starts in alphabetical order at the top of the your iTunes library. So you hear the same song over and over again every time you plug your iPhone into your car. (And it’s usually an embarrassing ‘guilty pleasure’ song that starts blaring just as you open the window…) But now, a potential solution has been soaring up the iTunes charts in the form of a ten-minute silent song called “A a a a a Very Good Song”. Created by Samir Mezrahi, the song allows users a full nine minutes and fifty-eight seconds to find the song they actually want to hear after connecting their iPhone to their car through USB. Mezrahi is charging $0.99 for each download of the silent song. And with a title like that, it is almost sure to be first in alphabetical order on your phone.
(I’ve heard worse!)
(The problem is going to be when he tries to play it live!)
(The problem is going to be when he gets sued for plagiarism!)
(It sounds like your phone’s dead!)
-Macrumors
BS CHRONOMETER 08.15.17
TODAY’S CELEBIRTHDAYS . . .
1964 [53] Melinda French Gates, Dallas TX, wife of Microsoft founder Bill Gates/philanthropist (co-founder & co-chair of the Bill & Melinda Gates Foundation)
1968 [49] Debra Messing, Brooklyn NY, TV actress (“The Mysteries of Laura” 2014-2016, “Will & Grace” 1998-2006 and starting again in September)/movie actress (“Lucky You”, “The Wedding Date”)
1972 [45] Ben Affleck, Berkeley CA, movie director (“Argo”, “The Town”)/movie actor (“Batman v Superman: Dawn of Justice”, “Gone Girl”)/screenwriter (Oscar-“Good Will Hunting”)/wed to actress Jennifer Garner (2005, separated 2015) COMING UP…Justice League, November 2017
1989 [28] Joe Jonas, Casa Grande AZ, pop singer (DNCE-“Cake By the Ocean”, Jonas Brothers-“Burnin’ Up”)
1990 [27] Jennifer Lawrence, Louisville KY, movie actress (“Silver Linings Playbook”, “The Hunger Games” movies) COMING UP…Mother! September 2017
TODAY’S BS REASONS TO PARTY . . .
• “Acadian Day”, celebrating the French who settled areas of Canada now called Nova Scotia, New Brunswick, and Prince Edward Island in the early 17th century. Many Acadians were later banished by the British to Louisiana, where the name became contracted to ‘Cajun’.
• “Lemon Meringue Pie Day”, OK, we’re in! Just a small piece this time. NET: http://tinyurl.com/3osh9j9
• “Relaxation Day”, a day to think about and encourage new forms of relaxation. Meditation? Yoga? Beer?
• “I Love Cowboys and Cowgirls Day”, saluting all cowpokes everywhere whether they roam the range or ride the rodeo, pardner.
• “Failures Day”, to encourage the celebration of mistakes. But if you fail on purpose, it is a failure or a success?
• “Check the Chip Day”, a reminder to pet owners to check and update their pets’ microchip registration information
AND REMEMBER…
[Wed] Airborne Day
[Wed] Roller Coaster Day
[Wed] Tell a Joke Day
[Thurs] Baby Boomers Recognition Day
[Thurs] #2 Pencil Day
[Thurs] Thrift Shop Day
TODAY’S MUSIC EVENTS . . .
1969 [48] Woodstock Music & Art Fair opens in New York State on Max Yasgur’s Dairy Farm
(Performers included The Who, Santana, Grateful Dead, CCR, Janis Joplin, Joe Cocker, Jimi Hendrix and …Sha Na Na?)
2005 [12] Leonard Cohen files a lawsuit in Los Angeles Superior Court alleging that his former manager, Kelley Lynch, mismanaged his retirement funds to the tune of at least $5 million
TODAY’S FIRST . . .
2013 [04] The olinguito, native to Andes forests in South America, is the 1st new mammal to be discovered in 35 years (described as a mini-raccoon with a teddy bear face)
TODAY’S RECORDS . . .
2002 [15] ‘Slowest Police Chase on Record’ as cops in Bethlehem, Pennsylvania charge a 30-year-old man for public drunkenness after he’s spotted cruising down a street on a child’s Fisher Price Power Wheels car … at 3 mph
2009 [08] U2 s first UK gig of the “U2 360° Tour” breaks the attendance record for a concert at London’s Wembley Stadium with over 88,000 attending (Broken in June 2017 by Adele, 90,000).
BULL’S BITS
BS WACK FACTS:
✓ Ferrets can sleep so soundly that they cannot be woken up even when picked up and jostled.
✓ The human body becomes partially paralyzed during sleep to prevent harming itself when dreaming.
✓ Wet hay bales can spontaneously combust when stored improperly.
✓ Under extreme high pressure, diamonds can be made from peanut butter.
✓ A typical bird’s feathers weigh more than twice as much as its bones.
✓ The term ‘bug’ for a software malfunction dates back to 1947, when a fault was traced back to a moth stuck in the system.
-WTF Facts
BEING MARRIED MEANS (From the guy’s perspective)…
• Never again having to apologize for double dipping.
• Knowing her ‘getting ready’ timeline.
• Sharing the blankets from time to time.
• Always having to say “I’m sorry.”
• Being okay with going to bed before midnight on the weekend.
• Spending quality time at Walmart.
• Watching the Tyra Banks Show. And liking it.
• Going to events and seeing people you don’t like and saying “it’s good to see you” all night long.
• Being able to pass gas in front of her.
• Doing what she wants to do and pretending you had the same idea.
• Not being able to stay over at your girlfriend’s place.
BS PHONE STARTER:
☎ What law or social rule completely baffles you? Why?
BS RANDOM JOKE:
If you want to know what God thinks of money, just look at the people he gave it to.
BS WATER COOLER QUESTION:
Question: 85% of us love the smell of this, but the rest think it stinks. What?
Answer: The ocean
BS DEEP THOUGHT:
Judging a person does not define who they are. It defines who you are.
