Tuesday, August 20, 2013              Edition: #5050

Sheeters Always Prosper!

BS SHOW BIZ BUZZ:
✶ “Glee” creator Ryan Murphy has revealed the show’s producers have decided against a controversial storyline that would mirror Cory Monteith’s real-life death last month from an overdose of heroin and alcohol. ‘Finn Hudson’ will definitely have to be written out of the show, but it’s been decided that drug abuse would not match the context of the character. It’s also now thought the storyline needn’t be a vehicle for social change when the actor’s passing has been covered so extensively in the media. The memorial episode begins shooting this week; the FOX series returns for its 5th season September 26th. (How do you think he should go?)
– “Us Magazine”
✶ NBC Entertainment president Robert Greenblatt says all the kerfuffle (mostly from Republicans) over the TV network’s proposed Hillary Clinton bio-movie is overearly as it has not yet been ordered into production, only a script is being written. Many TV series and movies, he notes, never move beyond the ‘in development’ stage. Greenblatt quote: “Speculation, demands, and declarations pertaining to something that isn’t created or produced yet seem premature.” (Is somebody looking for an exit strategy here?)
– Deadline.com
✶ Director Spike Lee has raised the $1.25 million from crowd-funding website Kickstarter that he required to make his new movie. With the working title “The Newest Hottest Spike Lee Joint”, the movie is apparently about human beings who are addicted to blood but are not vampires. Lee promises it will be sexy, humorous, and – oh yes – bloody. Some 28 of his Kickstarter backers anted up the $10,000 required to sit next to Lee courtside at a NY Knicks basketball game. (For $20,000 you get to sit somewhere else.)
– ContactMusic.com
✶ And this may make many women feel better about themselves. 32-year-old actress Jessica Alba insists her reputation for keeping a lean figure despite having 2 children is overblown as she has many imperfections including cellulite, stretch marks, and even a ‘muffin top’. She admits her short attention span leads to boredom which leads to very brief workouts. So she’s tried to compensate by eating healthy foods, as evidenced in her book “The Honest Life: Living Naturally & True to You”. (Any muffin recipes?)
– Bang Showbiz

TODAY’S SHOW BIZ SKED:
• “America’s Got Talent” (NBC/CityTV) – 12 acts perform; each judge gets the opportunity to bring back a wildcard act.
• “Conan” (TBS/CTV) – Beware Of the Darkness (“Orthodox”). Rerun.
• “Ellen DeGeneres Show” (syndicated/CTV2) – Foo Fighters (“Wasting Light”). Rerun.
• “Jimmy Kimmel Live” (ABC/CityTV) – The National (“Trouble Will Find Me”). Rerun.
• “Last Call With Carson Daly” (NBC) – Superhumanoids (“Parasite Paradise”). Rerun.
• “Late Night With Jimmy Fallon” (NBC/CTV2) – New Order (“Live at Bestival”). Rerun.
• “Late Show With David Letterman” (CBS/NTV/Omni1) – John Legend (“Love In the Future”, out September 3rd).
• “So You Think You Can Dance” (FOX/CTV2) – The remaining dancers perform; 2 contestants face elimination; guest judge Jenna Elfman.
• “Tavis Smiley” (PBS) – Soul music legend Booker T Jones. Rerun.
• “Tonight Show With Jay Leno” (NBC/CTV2) – Kopecky Family Band (“Kids Raising Kids”). Rerun.
• “The View” (ABC/CTV) – Curtis Fields (“Cherish the Day”).

BS MUSIC NOTES:
• The Calling – Frontman Alex Band was reportedly abducted, beaten, and dumped on train tracks by thugs in Lapeer, Michigan over the weekend. His bandmates started a search when he was found missing on Sunday. His current condition is not known, but police have launched an investigation. The band had the #1 hit “Wherever You Will Go” in 2001.
• Ellie Goulding – The 26-year-old Brit singer-songwriter has landed her 1st UK #1 single with her new song “Burn”.
• Fergie – Her husband Josh Duhamel says he can’t wait for their expected son who is due next month. The 40-year-old tells E! News: “They just pee on you. I’m actually excited about that. I want to see it. I think it’s gonna be funny.”
• John Mayer – Today his 6th studio album, “Paradise Valley”, is released. It includes collaborations with Frank Ocean (whom he performed with on “Saturday Night Live”) and with sometime girlfriend Katy Perry.
• Justin Bieber – His mom Pattie Mallette tells “People” she has no control over his bad-boy antics as he won’t want her around if she tries to crack down. She says she texts and calls him every day but no longer travels with him on tour in order to give him some space.
• Katy Perry – Her new single “Roar”, from the upcoming album “Prism”, is expected to outsell Lady Gaga’s new single “Applause” by 2-to1. According to “Billboard”, Perry will likely shift up to 550,000 copies, while Gaga will peak at 225,000. They were both released the same day last week.
• The Lumineers – Today they release a ‘Deluxe Edition’ of their self-titled debut album with 5 bonus tracks, including studio recordings of songs that the band plays live but hadn’t yet recorded at the time of the original release. Also included is a new performance DVD.
• One Direction – At yesterday’s London press conference for their 3-D film, “One Direction: This Is Us” (out August 30th), they admitted they almost fired 20-year-old Zayn Malik from the group at the start of their career because he was always late for rehearsals. It’s still a struggle to get the guy out of bed to this day, they claim.
• The Wanted – Tom Parker’s girlfriend of 3 years, Kelsey Hardwick, says marriage is in the cards but she won’t let him propose until he agrees to wear a wedding ring. He claims he can’t do that because he hates anything around his fingers or neck. (If you can’t compromise over the ring, good luck with a marriage!)

TODAY’S VIDEO RELEASES:
• “Epic” ( PG Animated Adventure ): A teenager finds herself transported to a deep forest where a battle between the forces of good and evil is taking place. She bands together with a rag-tag group in order to save their world. Voice cast includes Amanda Seyfried, Beyoncé, Colin Farrell, Josh Hutcherson.
• “Scary Movie 5” ( PG-13 Comedy ): It’s been 6 years since the last installment. This time a couple (Ashley Tisdale & Simon Rex) learns they’re being stalked by a nefarious demon with the help of home-surveillance cameras. The horror spoof is highlighted by Charlie Sheen & Lindsay Lohan in bed together; Mike Tyson in fetish gear; and Snoop Lion smoking joints.
• Also released today: “Being Human: Season 5” (TV); “Boardwalk Empire: The Complete 3rd Season” (TV); “Mike & Molly: The Complete 3rd Season” (TV); “Parenthood: Season 4” (TV); and “Revenge: The Complete 2nd Season” (TV).

DANCING IN THE DARK:
New Yorkers are getting down in the dark at a new nightclub where there’s no alcohol, no velvet rope, and no attitude. You don’t have to worry about how you look, what you’re wearing, if you put on makeup or did your hair, and, most importantly, how weird you might look dancing. The idea at the weekly ‘No Lights, No Lycra’ dance party at a hall in Brooklyn is just to dance your ass off … solo. With just enough dim green laser illumination to prevent collisions on the dance floor, dancers feel free to express themselves with ecstatic and uninhibited moves. The 31-year-old organizer says she came up with the idea because, quote: “It’s hard to get that feeling of pure elation in regular life, especially as an adult.” (Think solo dancing in the dark will take off?)
– Sourced from NYDailyNews.com

LONG DISTANCE LOVE:
UK design company Little Riot has developed the ‘Pillow Talk’ app, which allows partners separated by miles to hear one another’s … heartbeats. Here’s how it works: Both people wear wristbands that sync up with their smartphones. The app connects the 2 people, and each plugs in his or her headphones or a very small pillow speaker to listen to the other’s heartbeat in real time. The product is not yet available, but the company is organizing a Kickstarter fundraising drive. (For the price this is likely to cost, we’d want more than beats.)
NET: http://tinyurl.com/mvj3vff
– SakshiPost.com

FIND YOUR OWN FINISH:
“Choose Your Own Adventure”, the multiple-ending books you loved as a child, are moving into the digital age. The creator of the popular series, RA Montgomery, and publisher Shannon Gilligan are currently raising funds on KickStarter to begin a new series designed for tablets called “Choose Toons”. The first will be about robots being built in readers’ parents’ garage. As with the books, there are various endings (11, in fact) with different paths to lead you there (20 story branches) with the goal being a positive ending. (This would be great at the movies.)
– “Globe & Mail”

EX HEX:
Imagine this scenario … you break up with your (seemingly) normal boyfriend, girlfriend, or spouse. Everything seems cool, but then their inner crazy comes out: They hack into your Facebook account, steal personal photos, and generally make your life a living hell. And yes, it can happen to you! A new study has found that 1-in-10 of us have been cyber-threatened by an ex. And we make it easy to become a victim: A staggering 50% of us share our passwords with our significant others. (Apparently because we’re attracted to people who can also only remember ‘1-2-3-4’.)
– McAfee.com

BS AMAZING INTERNATIONAL FACTS:
• A relative of the piranha can be found swimming off the coast of Sweden.
– “The Local”
• 2 million North Koreans now have mobile phones.
– BBC News
• There’s a Kenyan tradition of running naked at night.
– Magazine Monitor

BS CHRONOMETER 08.20.13


TODAY’S CELEBIRTHDAYS . . .
1948 [65] Robert Plant, West Bromwich UK, classic rock singer (Sensational Space Shifters since 2012, w/Allison Krauss-“Raising Sand”, The Honeydrippers-“Sea of Love”, Led Zeppelin-“Stairway to Heaven”)/Rock & Roll Hall of Fame (1995)

1954 [59] Al Roker, Queens NY, TV weather forecaster (NBC-TV’s “Today” since 1996)

1956 [57] Joan Allen, Rochelle IL, movie actress (‘Jason Bourne’ films, “The Upside of Anger”)

1969 [44] Billy Gardell, Pittsburgh PA, TV actor (‘Mike Biggs’ on “Mike & Molly” since 2010)

1970 [43] Fred Durst, Gastonia NC, rock singer (Limp Bizkit-“My Way”, “Re-Arranged”)

1974 [39] Amy Adams, Vicenza, Italy, 4-time Oscar-nominated movie actress (“Man of Steel”, “Trouble With the Curve”)  COMING UP: The Tim Burton film “Big Eyes” (2014).

1983 [30] Andrew Garfield, Los Angeles CA [raised Surrey UK], movie actor (“The Amazing Spider-Man”, “The Social Network”)  UP NEXT: “The Amazing Spider-Man 2” (2014).

1992 [21] Demi Lovato, Albuquerque NM, TV personality (“The X Factor” since 2012)/movie actress (“Camp Rock”)/TV actress (“Sonny With a Chance” 2009-11)/pop singer (“Heart Attack”)

BS REASONS TO PARTY . . .
• “Lemonade Day”, set aside to honor the old-fashioned Summer refreshment favorite. Many sources indicate that lemonade was invented on this day in 1630 in Paris, France.

• “Radio Day”, for no apparent reason other than someone penciled it in on a calendar years ago. To celebrate, all on-air personalities get a hefty raise, free lunch, and a magnum of Champagne. (In your dreams.)

• “Sturgeon Moon”, the Full Moon of August variously known as ‘Full Red Moon’, ‘ Green Corn Moon’ or ‘Grain Moon’.

• “World Mosquito Day”, observed annually to commemorate the 1897 date when British doctor Sir Ronald Ross discovered the link between malaria transmission and mosquitoes.

TODAY’S MUSIC EVENT . . .
1968 [45] University of Tennessee’s Dr David Lipscomb reports that guinea pigs suffer damage to their inner ears when exposed to 120 decibels of rock music over a 3-month period (guinea pigs are immediately banned from rock concerts)

TODAY’S FIRST . . .
1985 [28] Hanspeter Beck of South Australia finishes a 3,875-mile (6,236-km), 51 day trip from Western Australia to Melbourne … on a unicycle

TODAY’S RECORD . . .
1938 [75] Cleveland Indians catchers Frankie Pytlak and Hank Hel catch baseballs dropped 708 ft (216 m) from the 52nd floor of Cleveland’s Union Terminal Tower (average speed: 140 mph or 225 km/hr)

COMING UP . . .
[Wed] Medical Dosimetrist Day
[Wed] Poets Day
[Wed] Senior Citizens Day
[Fri] “The World’s End”; “You’re Next” open in movie theaters
[Fri] Reading & Leeds Festivals begin (UK)
This Week Is … Don’t Wait, Celebrate! Week
This Month Is … Cataract Awareness Month

BULL’S BITS


BS SORT THE SLOGANS:
Are the following phrases being used to market ‘Bic for Her Pens’ or ‘Tampax Pearl Tampons’?
• “Elegant silhouette” [Bic for Her]
• “Anti-slip grip” [Tampax Pearl]
• “Thin barrel” [Bic for Her]
• “Fun comfort grip” [Bic for Her]
• “Modern design” [Bic for Her]
• “Smooth, rounded tip” [Tampax Pearl]
• “Jeweled accents add style and fashion” [Bic for Her]
• “Soft, pearlescent grip for all-day comfort” [Bic for Her]
– Thanks to Elizabeth Preston

BS RANDOM JOKE:
If you have a lot of tension and you get a headache, do what it says on the aspirin bottle: ‘Take Two’ and ‘Keep Away from Children’.

TRUTH OR BS?
Some of the following statements are true, some total BS. Which are which?
• In addition to maple, you can also make syrup from birch trees. [TRUE. Although much less common, syrup from white birch trees is also commercially available.]
• A newly-discovered disease nicknamed ‘Physical Dyslexia’ causes sufferers to do virtually everything backwards. [BS. That’s called ‘left-handedness’.]
• For its erectile dysfunction medication Viagra, pharma giant Pfizer originally wanted to use the name ‘PermaBoner’ but that name was already trademarked. [C’mon, seriously? BS.]
• At one time ‘whooping cough’ was treated by putting a live frog in the patient’s mouth. [TRUE. The practice stopped when several patients ... croaked.]
• From its original Japanese title, the Nintendo classic ‘Super Mario Bros’ translates to ‘Italian Plumbers Take LSD Purple Monkey Dishwasher’. [Um, BS.]
• Fridge magnets are dangerous to people with pacemakers. [TRUE. Neodymium magnets can actually temporarily destabilize heart devices.]
• The average raindrop falls at about 7 mph or 11 km/hr. [TRUE. Unless you’re camping in a flimsy tent.]

BS WEB GOODIE:
With Robin Thicke continuing to deny he ripped off Marvin Gaye with “Blurred Lines”, it’s a good time to review a few other songs that sound an awful lot like predecessors …
NET: http://tinyurl.com/mscghfq

BS PHONE STARTER:
☎ What were the greatest ‘make-out’ locations in town when you were a teenager?

BS WATER COOLER QUESTION:
Question: Tuesday is said to be the best day to go HERE because it’s less crowded.
Answer: The bank.

BS DEEP THOUGHT:
Pick battles big enough to matter, small enough to win.


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