BS SHOW BIZ BUZZ:
The LA County DA’s office has opted not to press charges in that odd burglary case where jewelry disappeared and then magically reappeared during a party at millionaire Sam Magrid’s pad (so why did Lindsay Lohan tweet a picture of some jewels and a text saying, “I’m sorry, please pray for me”?) . . . Eddie Murphy is shopping around the idea of a “Beverly Hills Cop” TV series, which he would star in (this will never happen, if we’re lucky) . . . Starting in January, 44-year-old Jimmy Kimmel will be competing head-to-head against both Jay Leno (62) and David Letterman (65), when ABC-TV’s “Jimmy Kimmel Live” moves its start time to 11:35 pm (somebody’s gonna announce their retirement soon) . . . Actor Robert Pattinson is now selling his LA home, the one he shared with his ex, Kristen Stewart (no word on whether the buyer will get a ‘tainted love nest’ discount) . . . Word has it new “X Factor” judge Britney Spears was ordered by show-runner Simon Cowell to ‘put on a bra and take out her hair extensions’ (3 more reasons not to watch) . . . Actor Shia LaBeouf tells “USA Today” he took acid on the set of “The Necessary Death of Charlie Countryman” (coming in 2013), in an effort to understand his drug-addled character (the guy’s going to extremes lately in order to appear ‘edgy’) . . . The late Whitney Houston’s ex, Bobby Brown, has checked out of rehab after ‘graduating’ in just 3 weeks (it’s emerged that his stay was part of a plea deal after a DUI arrest in March) . . . And today’s edition of the “National Enquirer” features an interview with 62-year-old former pilot  Doug Gotterba, who claims he had a 6-year relationship with now 58-year-old actor John Travolta, whom he says had an ‘insatiable’ sexual appetite and enjoyed cavorting with multiple male partners at the time (the measure of whether there’s any truth in the sensational story may be whether Travolta sues or just let’s it slide).

TODAY’S SHOW BIZ SKED:
• “Jimmy Kimmel Live” (ABC/CHCH) – Good Old War (“Come Back as Rain”). Rerun.
• “Last Call With Carson Daly” (NBC) – Band of Skulls (“Sweet Sour”). Rerun.
• “Late Night With Jimmy Fallon” (NBC/CTV2) – No Doubt (“Push & Shove”, out September 25th). Rerun.
• “Late Show With David Letterman” (CBS/NTV/Omni1) – The Heavy (“The Glorious Dead”).
• “Today Show” (NBC) – Brit pop singer Cher Lloyd (“The X Factor”).

BS MUSIC NOTES:
• Neil Young – Columnist Liz Braun notes that when astronaut Neil Armstrong died Saturday, NBC News announced, “Astronaut Neil Young, first man to walk on moon, dies at age 82.” Well, he WAS on “Harvest Moon” 20 years ago, but honestly … the guy’s only 66.
• Justin Bieber – He’ll reportedly work with LA Reid to help mentor his group on the upcoming season of “The X Factor”, while Nick Jonas will team up with his longtime pal Demi Lovato.
• Rolling Stones – With a combined age of 273 and 50 years in the biz, they know every trick in the book about dropping hints to fans. That’s likely why pics have been released of them emerging from a  recording studio. Mick Jagger tweets: “Had fun in the Paris studio this week!”
• Taylor Swift – Tonight the video for “We Are Never Ever Getting Back Together” premieres as part of the special “MTV First: Taylor Swift”. The segment will air on MTV, CMT, and TeenNick. Swift will introduce the clip, then stay for an additional 15-minute interview on MTV.com.

COMING ATTRACTIONS:
A BS selection of movies in the making …
• “The Butler” – Former US First Lady Nancy Reagan has given her seal of approval for 74-year-old actress Jane Fonda to portray her in this upcoming film about a long-time White House staffer. She was due to begin shooting her role this week in New Orleans, but filming has been postponed due to Hurricane Isaac battering the Gulf Coast.
• “Jane Got a Gun” – Here’s a Hollywood rarity … a Western directed by and starring a woman. Lynne Ramsay will direct Natalie Portman in this story about a woman who must ask an ex-lover for help in order to save her outlaw husband from a gang that is out to kill him. Shooting starts in early 2013.
• “The Kennedy Detail” – Maggie & Jake Gyllenhaal’s filmmaker father Stephen Gyllenhaal is planning to mark the 50th anniversary of John F Kennedy’s 1963 assassination with a new movie focused on the Secret Service personnel assigned to protect the US president. He’s currently adapting the script from former agent Gerald Blaine’s book of the same name.
• “Motor City” – Actor Adrien Brody is in negotiations to replace Gary Oldman as the lead bad guy opposite Gerard Butler in this story of a recently released prisoner who goes on the hunt for the man who framed him. Shooting is due to begin in Atlanta in September, with an eye to an April 2013 release.
• “Week 14″ – Looking to parlay the popularity of football into a feature film, the NFL is teaming with Flame Ventures to produce this drama that will chronicle the last 3 weeks of the NFL’s regular season as seen through the eyes of fictional players, coaches, and their significant others. The plan is to head into production after the February 3rd Super Bowl.

SPUD CLEANER:
To pick glass shards out of your dishwasher, experts advise you use the ‘potato method’. Start by grabbing a flashlight and turning off the lights in your kitchen. Shine the flashlight in the bottom of the dishwasher. Any pieces of glass will catch the light, so you can see where they are. Then take half a raw potato and, while wearing thick gloves, run the potato over the glass shards. The glass will become embedded in the potato and be easy to remove. Then simply run the washer on an empty cycle to rinse down any smaller pieces. (Do not eat the potato!)
– RealSimple.com

THINGS YOUR KID’S SCHOOL PRINCIPAL WON’T TELL YOU:
✓ The child you see at home? That’s almost never the one we see at school.
✓ If you want to talk to me about a problem, schedule a morning appointment when I’m fresh. By the afternoon, I can get pretty frazzled.
✓ You may be right, that teacher DOES stink. I may actually be in the process of firing her. Legally, I can’t tell you that, though, so that’s why I’m sitting here quietly while you complain.
✓ If you and your child simply don’t like his teacher, tough luck. Think of it as a lesson: In school, as in life, sometimes you have to learn to deal with things you don’t like.
✓ Please don’t do your child’s work for him. Kids need to make mistakes and struggle through things; it’s how they learn.
✓ You think that what happens at home stays at home? We hear about your financial problems, your nasty fights, your drinking problem. We end up knowing way too much about everybody.
✓ Don’t tell me your child would never lie to you. All kids make mistakes, and great students are often the ones most afraid to tell their parents when they screw up.
✓ My biggest pet peeve? Parents who complain to me before talking to the teacher.
✓ Kids are easy. It’s the parents who are tough. They’re constantly trying to solve their kids’ problems for them.
– Condensed from RD.com

CHARGE YOUR PHONE WITH YOUR BUTT:
‘Power Felt’ is a new thermoelectric device developed by researchers at Wake Forest University’s Center for Nanotechnology & Molecular Materials. It converts wasted body heat into electric current. Just by holding – or even sitting on – a piece of Power Felt will keep your phone charged 10-to-20% longer per day by retrieving energy from your body heat. That’s just one of many potential applications for the device. (A swatch of cloth plus your hot bod’ … it’s electric!)
– “News & Observer”

CELEBRITY ANIMALS – WHERE ARE THEY NOW?
• The Dog from “Frasier” – ‘Eddie’ was played by a Jack Russell terrier named ‘Moose’ for over a decade, appearing in 192 episodes of the series from 1993-2004. Sadly, he died in 2006.
• The Orca from “Free Willy” – ‘Keiko’ was a captured whale living in a tank at a Mexico City theme park. 3 years after the movie, he was moved to the Oregon Coast Aquarium, then to Iceland in 1998. In 2003, during preliminary efforts to release him, he beached himself and died.
• The Taco Bell Dog – You probably remember the ‘Yo Quiero Taco Bell’ Chihuahua from all those fast-food commercials in the late ‘90s? She had a stroke in 2009 and her handler had to euthanize her.
• The Dog from “Full House” – ‘Comet the Dog’ is also dead, from lung cancer. But hey, that series was a long time ago now, from 1987-95.
• ‘The Cat & Dog’ from “The Adventures of Milo & Otis” – The 1986 film was actually a re-cut of the original Japanese movie “The Adventures of Chatran”. During filming, over 27 kittens were used to play the same role, and as many as 20 didn’t even survive until the final shot. Alas!
• ‘Baloo’ from “The Jungle Book” – The big bear was Mowgli’s best friend throughout Disney’s 1967 classic. Ha! Suck it, death! Good luck killing off an animated character. Although, his voice was supplied by actor/comedian  Phil Harris … who died in 1995.
– Cracked.com

FOR THE RECORD:
The city of Dresden, Germany will soon be getting a monstrous addition to its public transportation system that can only be described as a train on wheels. The 3-section Autotram Extra Grand bus, coming in October, is 98-feet-long and can carry 256 passengers, but doesn’t require any special training for its driver. Said to be as easily maneuverable as a commonly sized bus, the Autotram Extra Grand makes use of a computer system to aid its driver with turning. (People at the back of the bus arrive a half-hour later.)
– Dvice.com

DID YOU KNOW?
• University of Western Australia research shows that pedestrians all over the world tend to keep to the right when other people are walking toward them.
– PA News
• Africa is the fastest-growing mobile phone market in the world, with 620 million subscribers. And in some countries (Botswana, Gabon, and Namibia), there are more subscriptions than people.
– CBC.ca
• Some male Pectoral Sandpipers go more than 2 weeks with hardly any sleep, the most extreme case of uninduced sleep deprivation known in any animal. Why? They stay awake when females are most fertile.
– NewScientist.com

BS CHRONOMETER 08.30.12

TODAY’S CELEBIRTHDAYS . . .
1930 [82] Warren Buffett, Omaha NE, investor (Berkshire Hathaway)/world’s 3rd-wealthiest with $44 billion/philanthropist who’s announced he’ll will 85% of his fortune to the Bill & Melinda Gates Foundation

1948 [64] Lewis Black, Silver Spring MD, incensed & sarcastic political commentator often featured on Jon Stewart’s “The Daily Show”

1963 [49] Michael Chiklis, Lowell MA, movie actor (“Rise Of the Silver Surfer”, “Fantastic Four”)/TV actor (“No Ordinary Family” 2010-11, “The Shield” 2002-08)

1972 [40] Cameron Diaz, San Diego CA, movie actress (“What To Expect When You’re Expecting”, “Shrek” movies)

1986 [26] Ryan Ross, Summerlin NV, rock guitarist-vocalist (Panic! At the Disco-“Nine In the Afternoon”, “I Write Sins Not Tragedies”)

BS REASONS TO PARTY . . .
• “Day of Disagreement”, considered by some relationship experts to be the day of the year on which couples are most likely to bicker and have needless arguments. Why? Triggers might include post-vacation depression, domestic chaos getting ready for back-to-school, and financial strain after blowing the bank account over the Summer.

• “Holistic Pet Day”, initiated by the Animal Miracle Foundation to encourage pet owners to develop a healthy lifestyle for their pets through diet, exercise, and environment. The observance also celebrates a growing interest in natural medicine and treating animals by looking at the whole body. You can celebrate by …
✓Feeding your pet natural foods, treats, and supplements.
✓Exercising with your pet … and don’t forget the massage!
✓Minimizing the chemicals used in the home to reduce your pet’s exposure.

• “International Day Of the Disappeared”, an annual commemoration to draw attention to the fate of individuals imprisoned in places unknown to their relatives and/or legal representatives.

• “Talk Intelligently Day”. And for those who normally talk intelligently, it’s “Talk Brilliantly Day”.

• “Toasted Marshmallow Day”, celebrating that great Summer treat on a stick. So how do you like yours done?
NET: http://tinyurl.com/96vycjb

THIS DAY IN SHOW BIZ . . .
1993 [19] Debut of “Late Show With David Lettermen” on CBS-TV attracts 23 million viewers (first guest is Bill Murray; musical guest is Billy Joel)

2001 [11] Final episode of kids’ TV show “Mister Roger’s Neighborhood” (debuted in 1966)

TODAY’S MUSIC EVENT . . .
2001 [11] NYC funeral for singer-actress Aaliyah, killed in a plane crash

TODAY’S FIRSTS . . .
1988 [24] Vicki Keith of Kingston, Ontario becomes 1st swimmer to conquer all 5 Great Lakes

1999 [13] Oklahoma State University introduces ‘Super Fan-nies’, disposable diapers adorned with the football team logo

TODAY’S RECORD . . .
1987 [25] Yves Pol of France runs a complete marathon backwards in 3:57:57

COMING UP . . .
[Fri] “For a Good Time, Call…”; “The Possession” open in movie theaters
[Fri] Love Litigating Lawyers Day
[Fri] Full ‘Blue’ Moon
[Fri] Invent a New Sandwich Day
[Fri] Trail Mix Day
This Week Is … Minority Enterprise Development Week
This Month Is … Children’s Vision & Learning Month

BULL’S BITS

TRUE LIES:
New stats say the average person tells 26 lies a day. Most are ‘little white lies’, such as …
• “No Kanye, nobody thinks you’re an ass.”
• “Bud Light Lime? Mmm, this is good.”
• “No, I didn’t get your friend request.”
• “Hey Gaga, nice outfit!”
• “Boy, that Jay Leno’s hilarious, isn’t he?”
– Thanks to BennyDesk.com

BS RANDOM JOKE:
It’s always darkest before dawn. So if you’re going to steal the neighbor’s newspaper, that’s the time to do it.

BS U-PICK TRIVIA:
Which is the only fish that can blink with both eyes simultaneously?
a. Goldfish
b. Shark [CORRECT]
c. Winkfish

BS PHONE STARTER:
☎ What would be the worst way to die? Being killed in a plane crash tops a recent poll (16%), followed by being bitten by a snake (13%).

BS WATER COOLER QUESTION:
Question: Women are more likely to make THIS mistake while driving than men.
Answer: Hitting the gas instead of the brake pedal.

BS DEEP THOUGHT:
You can’t tell how deep a puddle is until you step in it.