Monday, December 13, 2004        Edition: #2929
Thanks For Being On Our Sheet List!

• After just completing a Canadian tour, the 71-year-old ‘Godfather Of Soul’ James Brown has revealed he has prostate cancer for which he’ll undergo surgery WEDNESDAY. It’s expected he’ll take 3 weeks to recover. He plans to release his autobiography “I Feel Good: A Memoir of a Life of Soul” in JANUARY as scheduled.
– World Entertainment News Network
• First Bob Geldof re-recorded the 1984 charity single “Do They Know It’s Christmas” in Britain (where it’s now #1), now American producer Jermaine Dupri says he’ll redo “We Are the World” at a post-Grammy Awards session on FEBRUARY 13th. The original 1985 ‘USA For Africa’ single raised some $64 million for famine relief. The new version will be called “We Are the Future” and may feature Usher, Kanye West, Jay-Z and anyone else who can be roped in. There’s a push to get radio stations around-the-world to simultaneously play the original record on JANUARY 28th, the 20th anniversary of its recording.
– E! Online News
• Ashlee Simpson has reportedly become Wilmer Valderrama’s latest romantic pursuit since his split from Lindsay Lohan. An onlooker in a Hollywood club says the pair spent much of one night talking, dancing and flirting.
– “US Weekly”
• Lindsay Lohan’s parents Michael & Dina are about to dissolve their dysfunctional marriage. Following Michael’s sentence to seek treatment at an alcohol & substance abuse facility, Dina says she’s ready to pack it in. A master of understatement, she says, “Michael has problems that he needs to deal with. He needs to take care of himself.”
– “People” magazine.
• Nicole Kidman has sparked rumors she’ll soon tie the knot with her new boyfriend, producer Steve Bing. The pair have been dating for 3 months and friends are convinced they’re about ready to formalize their relationship.
– UK’s “Sun” tabloid.
• 27-year-old former “Survivor” contestant Jenna Lewis was whining a few months back when a wedding-night sex tape of her & 21-year-old husband Travis Wolfe began selling on the Internet for $40 a pop. At the time she insisted the video had been stolen, but now word has leaked it was actually she and her manager who created the Website where it’s being hawked, taking in more than $100,000 since JUNE. Seems she’s banking 70% of the sales, but her now ex-husband gets … zilch.
– “NY Daily News”
• This may be what cops were looking for during the most recent raid on Neverland Ranch. It seems several porn mags have been seized, yielding a smoking gun piece of evidence – Michael Jackson’s fingerprints and his accuser’s on the same page. Experts say the evidence will confirm his accuser’s testimony and could nail down a conviction.
– “National Enquirer”
• A number of Hollywood artifacts from TV and film hit the auction block in Beverly Hills FRIDAY. Among the items sold: a Don Knotts deputy uniform shirt from “The Andy Griffith Show” which sold for $9,000; an original vintage RCA Type-77 microphone used by Elvis Presley went for $37,500; Sonny & Cher stage outfits from “The Sonny & Cher Comedy Hour” fetched $6,500; and Marilyn Monroe’s famous white dress that billowed over a subway vent in the “Seven Year Itch” went for $60,000 – 10 times more than it was expected to fetch.
• The ‘Celebrity Nativity Scene’ at London’s Madame Tussauds, with David & Victoria Beckham as Joseph & Mary, George W Bush & Tony Blair as Wise Men, and Samuel L Jackson & Hugh Grant as shepherds, has generated so much controversy and furor – the wax museum is considering making it an annual event with a changing cast of characters.
– “USA Today”

• Ashanti – TONIGHT she’s on “Late Show With David Letterman”.
• Busted – 21-year-old singer James Bourne narrowly escaped serious injury in an accident on the way to the band’s concert in Glasgow, Scotland when the mini-van he was traveling in was sideswiped by another car. He apparently decided not to travel in the front of the vehicle, which may have saved his bacon.
• Evanescence – A Maryland man is suing Wal-Mart for selling his daughter their CD “Anywhere But Home” which allegedly contains the F-word. The basis of the suit is Wal-Mart’s policy of not carrying ‘explicit music’.
• Hives – TONIGHT they’re on the “Late Late Show” on CBS-TV.
• Keith Urban – His FRIDAY night concert in Tucson AZ was canceled after fire broke out at the Tucson Convention Center. Meantime, his fan club has designed & produced a 2005 calendar featuring 12 pictures of him at various concerts. It’s the 3rd year for the charity calendar, available online for $15.
• Ludacris – His appearance at a Montgomery AL mall was cut short after 2 fights broke out within 20 minutes and police asked him to leave. He’ll no doubt be talking about it TONIGHT when he appears on the “Tonight Show With Jay Leno”.
• Missy Elliot – When she attends parties she is followed around by a guy carrying a box. In the box: extra diamonds and jewels just in case she wants to bling-up, or bling-down for the event.

TONIGHT Ron MacLean & Jessica Holmes host the 19th annual Canadian TV awards live (8 pm EST) on CBC-TV from Toronto’s Metro Convention Centre. Among those appearing: “Canadian Idol” winner Kalan Porter and host Ben Mulroney, “Corner Gas” star Brent Butt, Gavin Crawford from “This Hour Has 22 Minutes”, and perhaps for the only time this season – MacLean is joined by “Hockey Night in Canada” cohort Don Cherry (makes you wonder, are they getting paid for just sitting around?).

According to the new book “Better Than Homemade”, we use Cool Whip for a lot of things – soothing burns, soaking sore feet, shaving, even for polishing shoes (the only thing you should never, ever use it for is … food). The book also notes that people in Puerto Rico eat the most Cheez Whiz. A favorite snack there is Cheez Whiz on Wonder Bread, topped with ground Spam. (What, no Cool Whip?)
– “Better Than Homemade”

A geneticist from Cambridge University believes that human life expectancy will someday reach an average of several thousand years, and says that the first human to live to the age of 1,000 is probably alive today and about 60-years-old. Dr Aubrey de Grey claims that all of the technology needed to dramatically slow the aging process is already in existence and needs only more clinical trials in order to be applied to humans. He estimates that anti-aging therapies will be perfected in mice within 10 years, and a further 10 years will bring similar results in humans. And because these therapies can repair accumulated damage, they can reverse the symptoms of age in people who are already alive today. (Bottom line – you better get used to having your mother-in-law for the holidays.)
– BBC News

According to a panel of doctors, pharmacists and other experts, the most effective remedy for a snoring partner is – DUH! – a nudge in the ribs. (For hiccups – a slap upside the head.)
– “Health Which?” magazine.

Czech inventor Antonin Kaspara has created the world’s first vibrating ‘Bat Shoes’ to help the blind navigate while walking. The sole of each shoe contains a built-in device which shoots out a beam of infrared light in all directions, then a sensor picks up reflected light off potential obstacles causing the shoe to vibrate, thereby warning the wearer. It works like a bat’s sonar except it uses light beams rather than sound. (Also the perfect gift for those hard-to-shop-for foot fetishists.)
– “Curious Times”

• New research says the more you sleep, the more you lose weight. (Unless you sleep in the kitchen.)
• According to a new poll, nurses are the most honest of professionals. The least honest? Car salesmen. (What if you buy a car from a nurse?)

“Tony called me and I was like, ‘Dude, I suck.’ And he was like, ‘Dude, come over.’ So I went to his house and a bunch of our friends there were playing these tracks that Tony was doing that were, like, stupid. I was like, “You did not do these.” And he’s like, ‘Yep, you wanna hear your tracks?’ And I was like, ‘Nuh-uh, you did not.’ So he pulls out this one and I’m like, ‘Oh my God, that’s my song’.“
– Gwen Stefani waxing eloquent about songwriting.


1929 [75] Christopher Plummer, Toronto ON, movie actor (“National Treasure”, “Alexander”)/2 Tony Awards/2 Emmy Awards/1 Genie Award/Governor-General’s Performing Arts Award (2001)/Canada’s Walk of Fame (1999)

1943 [61] Ferguson Jenkins, Chatham ON, Canada’s first Hall of Fame MLB player (pitcher with 3,192 career Ks, 1971 Cy Young Award with Chicago Cubs, 20-game winner 7 times, only MLB pitcher to strike out over 3,000 while walking less than 1,000)

1948 [56] Ted Nugent, Detroit MI, rock singer/guitarist (formerly with Damn Yankees, Amboy Dukes) who’s sold over 30 million albums worldwide  UP NEXT: He’ll tour with country star Toby Keith in the new year.

1949 [55] Randy Owen, Ft Payne AL, retired country singer (Alabama-“When It All Goes South”, “The Closer You Get”)

1957 [47] Steve Buscemi, Brooklyn NY, movie actor (“Big Fish”, “Fargo”)/sometime TV actor (‘Tony Blundetto’ on “The Sopranos” 2004)

1967 [37] Jamie Foxx, Terrell TX, movie actor (“Ray”, “Collateral”)  ON TAP: Has 3 pics lined up: the Gulf War drama “Jarhead”, the action-adventure “Stealth”, and a bigscreen version of the classic TV show “Miami Vice”.

1975 [29] Tom DeLonge, Poway CA, rock singer (Blink 182-“I Miss You”, “What’s My Age Again?”)

TODAY is “St Lucy’s Day”, honoring her 304 AD birth. Legend has it that, in order to follow a life of religious devotion, she cut out her eyes and sent them on a plate to a persistent lover who was haunted by them (especially afterward!). Today hotels in Sweden each feature their own ‘Lucia’, a young blond girl in white gown who serves guests coffee and ‘lussekatter’ (saffron buns) to celebrate.

TODAY for some unknown reason is “Violins Day”. (So no matter what you’re doing, don’t forget your G-string!)

THIS WEEK is “Tell Someone They’re Doing a Good Job Week”, when you’re encouraged to compliment someone’s work effort each day. If you want a holiday bonus – make it the boss!

1982 [22] Vanna White turns over her 1st letter on “Wheel of Fortune” – it’s a ‘T’ (man, what a soft touch to make a living!)

1985 [19] 1st movie with different endings (murder mystery “Clue” features 3 different finishes)

1983 [21] Detroit Pistons beat Denver Nuggets 186-184 in TRIPLE OT after 3 hrs, 11 mins to set NBA records for ‘most points by a team’ and ‘most total points in a game’ (and most numb-bums in the stands)

1988 [16] 3 men end 29-hour, all-466-station subway ride in NYC (and live to tell about it!)

[Tues] International Shareware Day (hey, wanna swap pants?)
[Tues] “The Lord of the Rings: The Return Of The King Extended Edition” DVD released (like the original wasn’t long enough?)
[Tues] National Bouillabaisse Day (a little shellfish, a little wine, a little celery, a little wine, a little onion, a little wine …)
[Tues] Halcyon Days (7 days before & after Winter Solstice)
This Week Is . . . International Language Week
This Month Is . . . Drunk & Drugged Driving Awareness Month


• Who narrated the 1966 version of “How the Grinch Stole Christmas”? [Boris Karloff]
• What happens when a bell rings in the 1946 classic “It’s a Wonderful Life”? [An angel gets its wings.]
• What’s the angel’s name in “It’s a Wonderful Life”? [‘Clarence’]
• In Disney’s 1994 film “The Santa Clause”, what logo appears on the face of the moon as Santa’s sleigh passes in front of it? [Mickey Mouse.]
• In the 1964 TV movie “Rudolph, the Red-Nosed Reindeer”, what is Rudolph’s father’s name? [Donner]
• In the 2003 movie “Bad Santa”, this happens 243 times, a record for a Christmas movie. [Profanity, including the F-word and its variations 147 times and the S-word 34 times.]
• Who played the little girl in 1947’s “Miracle on 34th Street”? [Natalie Wood]
• In what movie did we first hear the song “White Christmas”? [“Holiday Inn” in 1942.]
• In the 1969 holiday classic “Frosty the Snowman”, where did Frosty melt? [In a greenhouse.]
• Who wrote the book that the now-showing movie “Christmas With the Kranks” is based on? [It’s based on John Grisham’s novel “Skipping Christmas”.]

What’d you watch LAST NIGHT – “Desperate Housewives,” or the “Survivor: Vanuatu” finalé?

Have you seen the new Paris Hilton perfume? Really HOT container. Nothing inside.

Some of the following headlines are taken word-for-word from tabloids. Some are total BS fakes. Your contestant must decide which is which while you read ‘em off rapid-fire …
• “Jungle Tribe Worships Jay Lenos’s Chin!”
• “Mr Rogers’ Ghost Terrorizing Children!”
• “Your Nose Can Talk!” [BS]
• “Monkeys Type Shakespeare Play!”
• “Scientist Reveals Thunder is Caused by Fat People Doing Jumping Jacks!”
• “Dog With No Legs Hops on Tail!” [BS]
• “NASA Probe Finds Heaven on Mars!”
• “Sex Researcher Discovers the Cheating Gene” [BS]
• “Belief in Elves Reaches All-Time High!”
• “World’s First Bigfoot Hooker Tells All!”

Today’s Question: The average human produces 10,000 gallons of THIS in a lifetime.
Answer to Give Out Next Show: Saliva.

Patience is something that you admire greatly in the driver behind you but not in the one ahead of you.

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