Tuesday, December 22, 2009        Edition: #4170
Good Morning, Sheetheads!


An autopsy by the LA Coroner’s Office is expected to get underway today on 32-year-old movie actress Brittany Murphy, who is said to have been taking prescription medication for flu-like symptoms before collapsing and dying in her shower Sunday morning (her filmography includes “The Expendables”, “Deadline”, “Drop Dead Gorgeous”, and “The Dead Girl”) . . . “Avatar” director James Cameron tells Fox News he’s convinced Arnold Schwarzenegger will return to the bigscreen once his term as governor of California ends in 2010 (“The Terminator: The Twilight Years”) . . . 30-year-old actress Kate Hudson has apparently put former boyfriend Alex Rodriguez (NY Yankees) behind her and thrown a lavish Christmas bash at her California home, which featured carolers, reindeer statues, and valet parking for celeb guests by attendants dressed as Santa (so much for her paycheck from “Nine”) . . . 60-year-old actress Meryl Streep, whose new romantic comedy “It’s Complicated” opens this weekend, says she will do sex scenes ‘forever’ because they make films more ‘authentic’ (yeah, thanks for that geriatric romp in “Julie & Julia”) . . . And former reality TV star Tila Tequila (“A Shot at Love …”) has topped her bizarre online announcement of her engagement to billionaire heiress Casey Johnson (Johnson & Johnson) by telling fans she’s now pregnant with her brother’s baby – as a surrogate mom for her brother & sister-in-law (her baby bump is a ‘Tequila Son Rise’).


• “Bonnie Hunt Show” (syndicated/CityTV) – Smokey Robinson (“Time Flies When You’re Having Fun”).
• “Carrie Underwood: An All-Star Holiday Special” (FOX) – A rerun of her December 7th special in which she performs holiday songs alongside Brad Paisley, David Cook, and Dolly Parton.
NET: http://www.fox.com/carrieunderwood/
• “Christmas At the White House: An Oprah Primetime Special” (ABC) – Barack & Michelle Obama discuss White House preparations for the holidays with Oprah Winfrey.
• “The Hour” (CBC) – Snoop Dogg (“Malice N Wonderland”).
• “Jimmy Kimmel Live” (ABC/CityTV) – A rerun featuring Weezer (“Raditude”)
• “Late Late Show With Craig Ferguson” (CBS) – Harry Connick Jr (“Your Songs”).
• “Late Night With Jimmy Fallon” (NBC/A Channel) – Michael McDonald (“This Christmas”).
• “Late Show With David Letterman” (CBS) – Colbie Caillat (“Breakthrough”).
• “Live With Regis & Kelly” (syndicated/CTV) – David Archuleta (“Christmas From the Heart”).
• “Lopez Tonight” (TBS) – Slash (“Slash & Friends”, due in 2010).
• “Today Show” (NBC) – Mary J Blige (“Stronger With Each Tear”).
• “Tonight Show With Conan O’Brien” (NBC/A Channel) – Kid Cudi (“Man On the Moon: The End of Day”).
• “The View” (ABC/CTV) – Boys Like Girls (“Love Drunk”).

• Beyoncé – Her parents are said to be getting a divorce. Her mom, Tina Knowles, has reportedly begun legal proceedings in Houston TX against her manager-dad Mathew after they’ve been living separate lives for months.
• Dave Matthews Band – Today they release the 4-disc box set “Europe 2009”, featuring 3 CDs recorded at a show in Luccia, Italy and a live DVD shot in London UK.
• Eminem – Today he re-releases his latest album, “Relapse”, with 7 bonus tracks. The new package is titled “Relapse: Refill”. The full album “Relapse 2” has been delayed until next year.
• Faith Hill – She’s the only artist in any musical genre to have 2 of the top 10 ‘Most-Played Songs Of the Decade’, according to Nielsen research. “Breathe” is at #4; “The Way You Love Me” at #6.
• Ozzy Osbourne – He says his best-ever Christmas was 2003 … when he was unconscious in hospital after a quad-bike accident.
• Pussycat Dolls – Nicole Scherzinger’s 3-year romance with British F-1 racing driver Lewis Hamilton is seemingly on the rocks. They’ve reportedly not seen each other in 3 weeks and have shelved plans to spend the holidays together.
• Susan Boyle – She’s being touted as the likely choice to record the next ‘James Bond’ theme song. The as-yet-untitled film is due out in 2011.
• Taylor Swift – Today “Our Song” becomes available as a download for “Guitar Hero” as part of the ‘Celebrity New Year’s Rock Track Pack’ that includes hit singles by Maroon 5 and No Doubt.
• Van Halen – Today “Guitar Hero: Van Halen”, the 4th “Guitar Hero” game of 2009 hits store shelves. David Lee Roth is at the microphone.

• “All About Steve” ( Comedy ): Sandra Bullock (“The Proposal”) & Bradley Cooper (“The Hangover”) star in this story about a crossword-puzzle constructor who falls for a CNN cameraman after a single date and follows him all over, along the way collecting a crew of misfits who appreciate her eccentricity. Co-stars Thomas Haden Church (“Spider-Man 3”).
• “District 9” ( Sci-Fi Thriller ): In Johannesburg, South Africa a government agent becomes sympathetic to the extraterrestrial race living in slum-like conditions within the city’s borders when he is exposed to their biotechnology. No-name cast. Shot in South Africa. Also comes in a ‘2-Disc Edition’.
• “Extract” ( Comedy ): Jason Bateman plays the owner of a flower-extract plant who’s trying to contend with myriad personal and professional problems, such as his potentially unfaithful wife and employees who want to take advantage of him. Co-stars Kristen Wiig, Ben Affleck, and Mila Kunis. Directed by “King Of the Hill”/”Beavis & Butt-Head” creator Mike Judge.
• “(500) Days of Summer” ( Romantic Comedy ): Zooey Deschanel (“Yes Man”) & Joseph Gordon-Levitt (“3rd Rock From the Sun”) star in this quirky rom-com about a woman (named ‘Summer’) who doesn’t believe true love exists, and the greeting-card writer who falls for her. Soundtrack includes The Black Lips, Regina Spektor, The Smiths, Wolfmother, and France’s First Lady, Carla Bruni-Sarkozy.
• “It Might Get Loud” ( Documentary ): A documentary on the electric guitar from the point of view of 3 significant rock musicians – The Edge (U2), Jimmy Page (Led Zeppelin), and Jack White (White Stripes, Raconteurs, etc).
• Also released today: “American Pie Presents: The Book of Love” (straight-to-DVD Comedy); “Beyond a Reasonable Doubt” (Thriller); “Family Guy: Something, Something, Something, Darkside” (TV); “Kyle XY: The Complete 3rd & Final Season” (TV); “The Secret Life Of the American Teenager: Season 3” (TV); and “Taxi: The Final Season” (vintage TV).


Heward Dental Lab in Sandy, Utah is a combination tattoo parlor/dental office, specializing in inking artwork … onto teeth. Normally this artwork is created on the back teeth, the molars or bicuspids. Most people prefer having it on the cheek side of the tooth, some on the tongue side. Fans consider these a sort of ‘white collar tattoo’. They are seen only when the person wants to share what they have by pulling out the cheek so it can be seen. The other advantage to these tattoos is they can easily be removed in 5 minutes via a bit of grinding with a rubber wheel in a dental office. (Or by tying a string to the tooth and a doorknob and slamming the door.)
NET: http://www.toothartist.com
– neatorama.com

5. Play-Doh
4. Lionel Trains
3. Barbie
2. Crayons
1. Yo-Yo
– A&E


The sense of touch is more sensitive among women than men because their fingers tend to be smaller, a new study at McMaster University in Hamilton suggests. Scientists say that’s due to a higher density of fingertip touch receptors in smaller fingers. It’s thought this higher sensitivity of smaller hands with smaller fingers may improve the owner’s ability to perform detailed tasks such as embroidery or surgery. (Or both. Want to see the needlepoint on my appendectomy scar?)
– BBC News

A new compilation of the highest-grossing touring artists of the decade (rounded off) …
5. Rolling Stones ($427 million).
4. Bruce Springsteen ($444 million).
3. Kenny Chesney ($456 million).
2. Celine Dion ($522 million).
1. Dave Matthews Band ($529 million).
– Pollstar.com

A team of scientists at the University of Florida has been studying the voices of drunks. Researchers measured the pitch, speed, articulation, and volume of young adults who were given increasing quantities of gin and rum. They found significant changes in speech patterns even at alcohol levels below the legal limit for driving. Most people developed slow, high-pitched speech, although 1-in-5 lowered their voices. (Time for an on-air experiment!)
– “Social Studies”

Many people go to the gym day-after-day to do the same old boring routine. Experts say if you turn exercise into something you enjoy, you’re more likely to stick with it. A few ideas …
• Join a local sports team.
• Download an audio-book or podcast and listen to something engaging as you work out.
• Use exercise to challenge yourself … learn to surf, enroll in a hip-hop class, or take fencing lessons.
• Make an exercise date with your significant other. Do a partner yoga class, go for a bike ride, or for a hike.
– Condensed from BestHealthMag.ca.


A 27-year-old Tokyo, Japan man who goes by the geek handle ‘Sal 9000′ has wed ‘Nene Anegasaki’, a witty, doe-eyed beauty who looks perky in sexy skirts, doesn’t pick fights, and is always at his beck and call. What’s noteworthy is … she’s a videogame character in the Nintendo game “Love Plus”. The online ceremony was witnessed live by thousands. The wedding, while not legally binding, was Sal’s way of expressing his devotion to his avatar girlfriend. (Must have been some honeymoon!)
– CNN.com

The Na’vi language spoken in James Cameron’s new film “Avatar” took 4 years to write and develop.
– “Los Angeles Times”


1945 [64] Diane Sawyer, Glasgow KY, TV news correspondent (“Good Morning America” since 1999, “Primetime Live” since 1989, “20/20” 1998-2000, “60 Minutes” 1984-89)

1949 [60] Robin Gibb, Isle of Man, oldies singer (Bee Gees-“Stayin’ Alive”, “I Started a Joke”)/Rock & Roll Hall of Fame (1997)

1962 [47] Ralph Fiennes (‘fanes’), Suffolk UK, movie actor (“Harry Potter” films, “The Constant Gardener”)/stage actor (1995 Tony Award-“Hamlet”)

1989 [20] Jordin Sparks, Phoenix AZ, pop singer (w/Chris Brown-“No Air”, “Tattoo)/”American Idol 6” winner


• “Capricorn the Goat” astrology sign begins. People born under the sign are said to be practical, disciplined, methodical, organized, cautious, and careful.

• “International Arbor Day”. What a great time of year to honor trees … just as we’re slaughtering them and dragging them into our homes!

2006 [03] “Night At the Museum”, starring Ben Stiller, opens in movie theaters

1990 [19] Pearl Jam performs for the 1st time, using the name ‘Mookie Blaylock’ as the opening act for Alice in Chains in Seattle WA

2000 [09] 42-year-old Madonna & 32-year-old movie director Guy Ritchie wed at Skibo Castle in the highlands of Scotland (Ritchie reportedly got $76 million in the 2008 divorce)

2002 [07] Joe Strummer, lead singer of legendary British punk band The Clash, dies in Broomfield, England at age 50


2001 [08] Richard Reid attempts to destroy a passenger airliner by igniting explosives hidden in his shoes aboard American Airlines Flight 63 (the single reason you often now have to remove your shoes at airport security)

[Wed] “Alvin & The Chipmunks: The Squeakuel” opens in movie theaters
[Thurs] Christmas Eve
[Fri] Christmas Day
[Sat] Thank-You Note Day
[Sat] Whiner’s Day
[Sun] Ashura (Muslim)
This Week Is … Las Posadas
This Week Is … Make a New Year’s Resolution to Stop Smoking Month


Today is the first day of the astrology sign Capricorn, the Goat. If this is your birthday, here’s your reading in the stars: It’s okay to keep putting your money in your mattress but you might want to switch to saving paper money … it’s way more comfortable. This morning you’ll hear a strange clicking noise as you’re walking through your kitchen. Time to trim those toenails, isn’t it? Today is a terrific day to saunter; just be careful not to let it degenerate into a mosey. It’s a good week to use the expression ‘just dandy’ as often as possible. You’ll find that, gradually, fewer and fewer people will annoy you with inane questions.


• Most of the family gives beer as a gift, but Grandma hands out ammo.
• The holidays aren’t complete unless you go down to the ‘pen’ and visit Momma.
• You leave a bottle of Schnapps out for Santa.
• The centerpiece at Christmas dinner is anything prepared by a taxidermist.
• You stand under the mistletoe waiting for your cute cousin to walk by.


If they ever did a remake of the seasonal classic “It’s a Wonderful Life”, what modern-day actor should get the Jimmy Stewart role?

Weather is reported in “Star Wars” terminology on this site. Enter a city and get the current conditions, and whether it’s like ‘Hoth’, ‘Endor’, ‘Tatooine’, ‘Naboo’, or some other planet in the “Star Wars” universe.
NET: http://www.tomscott.com/weather/starwars/


Why did Frosty go and live in the middle of the ocean? Because snowman is an island.

Today’s Question: 9-out-of-10 people that hold THIS job are now older than 60.
Answer to Give Out Next Show: Catholic nun. (TBO.com)

Nothing is impossible for the person who doesn’t have to do it.

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