Friday, December 8, 2006        Edition: #3426
Deja Moo!

BS SHOW BIZ BUZZ:
23-year-old TV actor Louis Gross, who plays ‘Tony Soprano’s’ driver ‘Muscles Marinara’ on  “The Sopranos”, has pleaded guilty to petty larceny for stealing a shirt from a Manhattan store, then attacking the manager and a security guard after being spotted (maybe he was just rehearsing?) . . . “Survivor” host Jeff Probst says production disruptions have been minimal during the taping of the show’s 14th season in Fiji despite the military coup that erupted there earlier THIS WEEK (now the reward in the challenges is – you get to live) . . .  Former Led Zeppelin singer Robert Plant has been named rock’s all-time top frontman in a new “Hit Parader” magazine poll (Aerosmith’s Steven Tyler, Ozzy Osbourne, and late Queen singer Freddie Mercury also make the top 10) . . . George Clooney has bought the rights to “The Innocent Man”, the first non-fiction book by best-selling novelist John Grisham, about a former basketball player who spent 11 years on death-row in Oklahoma after being wrongly convicted (it is not yet known whether Clooney will direct or star in the movie version) . . . Nicole Kidman has purchased a $23-million townhouse in the posh Mayfair area of London, England to serve as her HQ while she shoots her new movie “His Dark Materials” (in the world’s most expensive city, that’s almost cheaper than several months in a hotel) . . . Pseudo-singer Ashlee Simpson has already spent almost $130,000 on plastic surgery THIS YEAR (lip plumping, boob and nose jobs) and now she wants to get – bottom implants . . . And a new survey of more than 2,000 moviegoers in 9 cities has found that fully 83% are ‘satisfied’ with the quality of current firms (did they ask them before or after the free tickets were handed out?)..

BS MUSIC NOTES:
• George Michael – He’s hoping to repeat the success of one of his biggest hits when he re-releases the 1984 seasonal hit “Last Christmas” by Wham! as a download-only track later THIS MONTH.
• Green Day – They’re holed up in an undisclosed studio in California’s Bay Area where they’ve reportedly come up with a whopping 3 albums-worth of new material.
• Gwen Stefani – She’s teaming up with Coty to create a new signature fragrance line which will debut in Fall 2007. TOMORROW she’s the musical guest on “Saturday Night Live” (NBC), hosted by movie actress Annette Bening.
• James Blunt – Rumors are floating that he’s engaged to Czech fashion model Petra Nemcova after she was spotted flashing a ring on her engagement finger while shooting an ad in NYC.
• Mary J Blige – TODAY the winner of 9 “Billboard Music Awards” visits the “Ellen DeGeneres Show” (syndicated/CityTV), then TONIGHT she does “Jimmy Kimmel Live” (ABC).
• Seal – TONIGHT Mr Heidi Klum guests on the “Tonight Show With Jay Leno” (NBC).

TODAY’S MOVIE OPENINGS:
• “Apocalypto” ( R-Rated Period Adventure ): Mel Gibson directs this historical epic set in Mexico during the decline of the Mayan civilization. When rulers insist that more human sacrifices will bring back prosperity, a young man attempts to flee the kingdom in order to avoid his fate. Stars newcomer Rudy Youngblood and a no-name cast. Whether the film’s a hit or miss, Gibson is being applauded for hiring a cast composed mostly of indigenous actors. Filmed entirely in Mexico.
NET: http://apocalypto.movies.go.com/
• “Blood Diamond” ( R-Rated Thriller ): Leonardo DiCaprio, Djimon Hounsou, and Jennifer Connelly star as a mercenary, a fisherman, and a journalist whose lives are intertwined during the hunt for a priceless diamond in Sierra Leone. The film has already brought the term ‘conflict diamonds’ into popular culture, describing how the mining industry profits from wars waged in Africa. Diamond honchos have already put together an ad campaign to counter the film’s accusations. Shot entirely on location in Africa.
NET: http://blooddiamondmovie.warnerbros.com/
• “The Holiday” ( PG-13 Romantic Comedy ): Cameron Diaz plays an American woman with guy problems who takes a trip to England where she crosses paths with a Brit woman (Kate Winslet) with similar troubles. Things get complicated when characters portrayed by Jude Law and Jack Black enter the picture. Clips and cool Diana Krall theme song here …
NET: http://www.sonypictures.com/movies/theholiday/index.html
• “Unaccompanied Minors” ( PG Family Comedy ): A group of kids create their own makeshift holiday while snowed in at Chicago’s O’Hare International Airport. Based on a true-life story by writer Susan Burton. Cast includes Wilmer Valderrama, Lewis Black and Rob Corddry from “The Daily Show”, plus 3 out of the 5 original cast members from “The Kids in the Hall” (1988-95).
http://unaccompaniedminors.warnerbros.com/

NEW BS GIZMOS & GADGETS:
• Boston MA-based Compellis Pharmaceuticals has developed a nasal spray that treats obesity by blocking smell and taste. (Wouldn’t cocaine just be simpler?)
• The New Jersey Department of Transportation is testing a new technology called ‘Safelane’ that’s designed to eliminates traffic accidents due to slippery conditions. It involves embedding an epoxy material right into the asphalt which prevents the roadway from icing. It ain’t cheap: Prepping a single test ramp on a highway exit cost close to $100,000, but it’s supposed to last 15 years. (Epoxy, huh? Isn’t that glue? Wouldn’t that bring traffic to a standstill?)
• The new ‘Nine Stars DZR’ is an infrared trash can that automatically opens when it detects a presence in front of its sensor. No more foot levers or touching a dirty garbage can lid. It runs on 4 D-cells … presumably not included. MSRP is $99. (Makes a great toy for your toddler when he’s old enough to peek over the rim.)

PEOPLE ON DRUGS WITH POINTY THINGS:
Another sport has been tainted by the ugly discovery of drug abuse … competitive darts. 32-year-old Robbie Green from northwest England has been suspended by the Darts Regulation Authority for 8 weeks after becoming the first player to ever fail a drug test. The sport only introduced drug-testing THIS YEAR and Green was just the 8th player to be tested by an anti-doping agency at the “UK Open”. (They should have know by his appearance: His right arm looks like ‘Popeye’, his left like ‘Olive Oyl’.)
– BBC News

THE NEW RECYCLING:
A Norwegian businessman wants to develop an alternative energy source by creating biodiesel fuel from … human fat removed by liposuction. Biodiesel can be produced from either plant oils or animal fat, and Lauri Venoy’s company is currently in negotiations with a Miami FL hospital to provide some 3,000 gallons of human fat per week from liposuction operations. The entrepreneur claims that’s enough to produce about 2,600 gallons of biodiesel fuel. (“Mom, these new french fries taste funny …”)
– “Aftenposten”

SANTA’S SACK:
World-famous upscale London UK department store Harrods has fired a ‘Father Christmas’ (store Santa) after complaints from customers. He allegedly asked one family if their teenage daughter would like to sit in his lap, and uttered ‘inappropriate comments’ to another visitor. After reviewing the complaints thoroughly, the FC’s seasonal contract was terminated.
– “The Metro”

THE NEW FACE-FRYER:
Newly declassified documents show the US military has been secretly testing a device called ‘ADS’ (Active Denial System) for some 10 years. It’s a non-lethal crowd control weapon that beams microwaves at people, making them feel like their face is melting and provoking ‘highly motivated escape behavior’. Security experts call it the ‘Goodbye Effect’. In testing on humans, most subjects reached their pain threshold in 3 seconds and no one has passed 5. The military claims its effects don’t last long but the device has yet to be checked independently.
– “Wired News”

SAME-SEX SITES:
The top US destinations for gay travelers, according to the first-ever online poll of gay, lesbian, bisexual and transgender travelers by the Travel Industry Association, include San Francisco CA; Key West FL; NYC; Fire Island NY; Provincetown MA; Chicago IL; San Diego CA; Boston MA; and Fort Lauderdale FL.
– “Chicago Tribune”

FOR THE RECORD:
Esther Medley of Centralia WA has set a new record by rolling 8 strikes and a total bowling score of 244 (300 is a perfect game). No big deal? It is if you consider she’s 94-years-old … and legally blind. Her 86-year-old husband Ralph tells her which pins are left standing after each ball.
– AP

THE BULL SHEET 12.08.06

TODAY’S CELEBIRTHDAYS . . .
1936 [70] David Carradine, Hollywood CA, movie actor (‘Bill’ in “Kill Bill: Vol 1 & 2”)

1953 [53] Kim Basinger, Athens GA, movie actress (“The Sentinel”, Oscar-“LA Confidential”)/ex-Mrs Alec Baldwin (1993-2002)

1964 [42] Teri Hatcher, Sunnyvale CA, TV actress (‘Susan Mayer’ on “Desperate Housewives” since 2004)

1976 [30] Dominic Monaghan, Berlin, Germany, TV actor (‘Charlie Pace’ on “Lost” since 2004)/movie actor (‘Merry’ in the “Lord of the Rings” trilogy)

1978 [28] Ian Somerhalder, Covington LA, TV actor (‘Boone Carlyle’ on “Lost” since 2004)

SATURDAY –
Movie actor Kirk Douglas (“Sparticus”) is 90; Movie actress Judi Dench (“Casino Royale”) is 72; Movie actor John Malkovich (“Con Air”) is 53; TV actress Felicity Huffman (“Desperate Housewives”) is 44; Country musician Jerry Hughes (Yankee Grey) is 41; Rock guitarist Brian Bell (Weezer) is 38; Rock singer/guitarist Jakob Dylan (The Wallflowers) is 37; Country singer David Kersh (“Wonderful Tonight”) is 36; Rock drummer Tre Cool (Green Day) is 34; TV actor Jesse Metcalfe (“Desperate Housewives”) is 28.

SUNDAY –
Movie actor/director Kenneth Branagh (“Harry Potter & the Chamber of Secrets”) is 46; Country singer Kevin Sharp (“Love Is All That Matters”) is 36.

TODAY’S BS REASONS TO PARTY . . .
• “Bad Hair Day”. So if you’ve got it, flaunt it!
• “Bodhi Day”, the Buddhist holiday commemorating ‘Buddha’s Enlightenment’.
• “Inane Answering Machine Message Day”. What’s yours say? Time to spice it up?
• “Take It in the Ear Day” which is either about accepting criticism graciously, or some really weird sexual proclivity.

SATURDAY –
• “Festival of Whirling Dervishes” in Konya, Turkey. Traditionally-dressed male dancers present their ‘sena’ or whirling ceremony when they spin in tight circles to achieve mystical union with heaven. This dizzy custom goes back over 700 years.
• “Homemade Gift Day”. Better start now if you hope to have that ugly knitted hat finished in time for the big day!
• “Pastry Day”. Better start now if you hope to have those burnt baked goods finished in time for the big day!

SUNDAY –
• “Children’s Memorial Day”. Oh stop it or I’m gonna cry.
• “Dewey Decimal Day”, honoring Melville Dewey (born 12/10/1851), known as the ‘Father of Modern Librarianship’ for inventing the ‘Dewey Decimal Classification (DDC) System’ when he was 21 and working as a student-assistant at the library of Amherst College in Massachusetts.
• “International Human Rights Day”, marking the anniversary of the UN’s ‘Declaration of Human Rights’ in 1948.
• “Nobel Prize Awards Day”, when the annual prizes for physics, chemistry, medicine, literature and economics are presented by the King of Sweden at a formal ceremony in the Stockholm Concert Hall. The ‘Nobel Peace Prize’ is awarded separately at the City Hall in Oslo, Norway. The awards were established by the will of Swedish chemist and dynamite inventor Alfred Nobel and have been held on this date since 1901.

THIS DAY IN SHOW BIZ . . .
1959 [47] For the first time, a movie features ‘Aromarama’, in which smells are piped in through ceiling vents to accompany the on-screen action of “Behind the Great Wall” (critics were right when they said, “This movie really stinks!”)
MOVIES YOU WOULDN’T WANT TO SEE IN ‘AROMARAMA’:
• “Barnyard: The Original Party Animals”
• “Curious George”
• “Thank You for Smoking”
• “King Kong”
• “101 Dalmatians”

TODAY’S MUSIC EVENT . . .
1980 [26] John Lennon is shot and killed by Mark David Chapman on the sidewalk outside NYC’s Dakota apartment building  FACTOID: Lennon’s widow, Yoko Ono, is asking that the anniversary of his death be marked by an annual day of worldwide healing, when we apologize to those who have suffered due to violence and war. The documentary film “The US vs John Lennon” opens in UK theaters TODAY.

TODAY’S FIRSTS . . .
1996 [10] 1st time a 2nd-year expansion team makes the NFL playoffs as Carolina Panthers beat San Francisco 30-24 (Jacksonville later becomes 2nd team to accomplish this feat)

TODAY’S RECORDS . . .
1940 [66] Record ‘Lopsided Professional Football Game’ as Chicago Bears slaughter NY Giants 73-0 in NFL championship game

1990 [16] ‘World’s Largest Pizza’ measures 122 feet, 8 inches long and a total of 11,816 square feet (Norwood, South Africa)

COMING UP . . .
[Mon] 2006 Nobel Peace Prize Concert (Oslo, Norway)
[Tues] Poinsettia Day
[Tues] Ding-A-Ling Day
[Thurs] Bouillabaisse Day
[Dec 16] Hanukkah begins
This Week Is … Drunk Drivers Awareness Week
This Month Is … MADD’s Tie One on For Safety Month

BULL’S BITS

TOP SWAPS:
The week’s most requested music files online …
5. DJ Unk – “Walk It Out”
4. Beyoncé – “Irreplaceable”
3. Justin Timberlake – “My Love”
2. Jim Jones – “We Fly High”
1. Akon – “Smack That”
– Big Champagne Online Music Measurement

BS WEB GOODIE:
The ‘How Christmas Works’ Webpage features a complete guide to Christmas traditions. Surprise, surprise! A lot of them turn out to be pagan … just like many of our other holidays.
NET: http://www.howstuffworks.com/christmas.htm

BS RANDOM JOKE:
Al-Jazeera was planning to launch an interactive satellite TV service. They decided against it when they realized if they told their viewers to press the red button, half of them would blow up.

BULLMAIL@THEBULLSHEET.COM:
• “Thanks to you I damn near pull a 30 share! Can’t do it without you, guys.”
– Ron Hunter @ Power 96 Albert Lea MN
(That’s great! Do we get a cut of your ratings bonus?)
• “Thanks. Your ‘BS’ sure works for me!!! Especially when I’m flying solo.”
– Kathleen Rankine @ Classic Hits 95.5 Belleville ON.
(Hey Kathleen, with Da Bull on board, you’re NEVER flying solo.)

BS WATER COOLER QUESTION:
Today’s Question: According to a poll, THIS is the #1 thing that people look for in a best friend.
Answer to Give Out Next Show: Fun.

BS DEEP THOUGHT:
Only your real friends will tell you when your face is dirty.


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