Monday, December 11, 2017        Edition: #6116

Don’t Take Any Sheet, Unless It’s Pure Bull!

★ David Cassidy‘s estate is being sued by his former lawyers over a $102,000 unpaid bill that they have been trying to collect for years. Cassidy’s will says his estate only has an estimated $150,000 in assets. The will stated his assets were to be awarded to his son Beau. The $150,000 would represent a huge cut if the firm is awarded the $102,000 by the judge.
(Where there’s a will, there’s a lawyer!)
★ Mama June has a lot to be thankful for this holiday season, because her daughter has delivered her own little pumpkin! 17-year-old Lauryn ‘Pumpkin’ Shannon has given birth to 7lb 14oz Ella Grace.  It’s the first child for Pumpkin and her fiancé Joshua. Word is that the 2nd season of “Mama June: From Not To Hot” will chronicle the pregnancy and new family member.
★ Charlie Sheen has filed a lawsuit against the National Enquirer.  That’s Sheen’s response to an article from last month that claimed he raped Corey Haim in 1986 on the set of the movie ‘Lucas’.  According to court documents, Sheen’s legal team claims that the story was run “because of a personal vendetta arising after he was unable to be the first one to break the story that Mr. Sheen was HIV positive.”
★ Rose McGowan has slammed her former ‘Charmed’ co-star Alyssa Milano 8 for showing support for Harvey Weinstein’s ex.  McGowan blasted Milano, posting “You make me want to vomit.  You gave me a body flashback. Well done, fake one.”  That was after Milano appeared on The Today Show, calling Georgina Chapman “an amazing mother, an amazing woman”, who is focused on doing the best for her children “given the situation”.
★ Earlier this year Canadian tennis star Genie Bouchard made headlines when she went on a date with a fan who asked her out via Twitter. Well, last week she reunited with John Goehrke, posting two photos to Twitter.  The pics showing her and Goehrke together, one captioned “Look who came to visit me!” and the other, “Where’s the mistletoe at?”
★ Adam Driver panicked when he was pulled over by the cops – only to find out it was because they wanted a picture.  Driver – who stars as Kylo Ren in ‘Star Wars’ – says he was cycling down the road one day when he was flagged down by police.  He was worried what he might have done wrong until they asked if they could pose for a selfie with him.
(I would expect they asked to see his “Driver’s” licence?)

• “The Tonight Show starring Jimmy Fallon” (NBC/CTV): Zendaya, Bill Crudup, Big Sean & Metro Boomin
• “The Late Show with Stephen Colbert” (CBS/Global): Matt Damon, Rahm Emanuel, Juanes
• “Late Night with Seth Meyers” (NBC/CTV): Anthony Anderson, Hong Chau, Amanda Seales, Mark Guiliana
• ” The Late Late Show with James Corden” (CBS/CTV): James Franco, Dave Franco, Hanson
• “Conan” (TBS/Comedy): Ed Helms, Fareed Zakaria, Electric Guest
• “Watch What Happens Live” (Bravo): Bridget Everett, Jax Taylor
• “The View” (ABC/CTV): Anthony Anderson, Tig Notaro
• “The Talk” (CBS): Andrea Barber, Candace Cameron Bure, Jodie Sweetin, guest co-host Carnie Wilson
• “Live with Kelly and Ryan” (ABC/CTV): Zendaya, Bernadette Peters
• “The Ellen DeGeneres Show” (NBC/CTV): Jennifer Hudson
• “The Great Christmas Light Fight” (ABC): The Richards-Silver families’ synchronized light show in Riverview, Fla.; the Harhut family’s combined properties of over 1300 blow molds in Peckville, Penn.; the Phifer family’s display, including an 80-foot tall real-life mega tree and Santa.
• “The Voice” (NBC): The top eight artists perform for America’s vote; the artists team up for competitive mashup duets.
• “Once Upon A Holiday” (HALLMARK): When a royal princess escapes her duties and goes incognito around Christmas, she falls for a kind man who is unaware of her true identity.
• “The Bachelor” (ABC): A preview of Season 22 features a look at Arie Luyendyk Jr.’s life, his family and love of racing.

• Ed Sheeran – managed to breach royal protocol while picking up his MBE at Buckingham Palace. He made the gaffe of touching Prince Charles on the arm instead of simply shaking his hand, breaking royal rules. He seemed unfazed by his error, insisting that he had a good conversation with the Prince of Wales.
• Justin Bieber – says he wants to do everything that he can to help families who are in need as a result of the fires that have ravaged Southern California. Quote: “I can use my resources to figure out ways to get some restoration in certain communities and fund-raisers or whatever we can do. So I am going to get on that.”
• Madonna – has teased that she will tour in 2018. She has spent the past 12 months living in Lisbon, Portugal after her son David joined football team Benfica FC’s youth academy, but she says she’s eager to get working on the production for a new run of dates for next year.
• Alice Cooper – has been cast as King Herod in NBC’s ‘Jesus Christ Superstar Live!’  He will  team up with British theatre director David Leveaux, a five-time Tony Award nominee for the show, which will be aired on Easter Sunday, April 1.
• Aerosmith – guitarist Joe Perry is streaming ‘Aye, Aye, Aye’ – featuring Cheap Trick singer Robin Zander – as the lead track to his forthcoming solo album, “Sweetzerland Manifesto.”
• Steven Tyler – has opened “Janie’s House,” a new shelter for abused women in Atlanta. He used the occasion to perform the new song, “Janie’s House.” The facility is the latest extension of Tyler’s Janie’s Fund, founded in 2015 as “a big voice for abused girls.”
• Eagles – Tickets go on sale Friday for 13 additional dates on their ‘An Evening with the Eagles’ 2018 tour.  New stops include Grand Rapids, Kansas City, Columbus, Lexington, Charlotte, Columbia, Raleigh, Birmingham, Houston, Buffalo, and Pittsburgh, plus second shows in Nashville, Vancouver and Toronto, and a new stadium concert with Chris Stapleton in Houston.
• Carrie Underwood – A dedicated fan from Kansas went all out in tribute to her in honor of his late wife. Lawrence Young had his dream Chevy Silverado truck turned into a collage of photos of Underwood in memory of his late wife, Kathi, who died in 2010 due to complications from fibromyalgia.  According to Young, “When she died, she told me, ‘Stick with Carrie’s music and it will help you through life”.
• Keith Urban –  turned to Twitter on Saturday to comment on a rumor about him and his wife, Nicole Kidman: “Not sure of how these ridiculous rumors start, but I’m hearing that I bought an apartment for Nic in NYC? TOTAL BS.  Where does this stuff come from?!!!”

If you really want to stay strong and fit for life, there are two exercises that are essential as you age, according to Dr. Michael Joyner, a physician and Mayo Clinic researcher who is one of the world’s top experts on fitness and human performance.  And you can do both year-round, no matter how cold or hot it is outside.  What are they?  Burpees and jumping rope. (He recommends using a weighted jump rope.)  You can build strength and combat age-related muscle loss in a lot of ways — But these two workouts will build both your endurance and your strength, all at once.  Remember this though: These are actually pretty tough exercises.  It takes time to build up strength and stamina, and you should talk to your doctor first if you’re worried you might injure yourself.  Most trainers recommend alternating between hard days and easy days.
(I can tell you this, I definitely got my burpee quota in on dollar draft night!)
(I only jump rope to cut in the line at the theater…)
(No problem.  I just did one of each.  Hard day–done!)

New Jersey lawmakers passed legislation on Friday that would make it illegal to operate drones while drunk.  If it becomes law, operating a drone while under the influence of alcohol will carry a sentence of up to six months in jail, a $1,000 fine or both,  It also would make using a drone to hunt wildlife and endanger people or property a similar offense.  At least 38 US states are considering similar legislation.
(It used to be you only had to worry about drunk drivers coming at you from 2 directions…now they can get you from the sky too…)

The mayor of the small Florida city of Davenport has been arrested on allegations that she used dead people’s disabled parking permits to park at City Hall.  Police say Mayor Darlene Bradley was arrested Tuesday and faces felony charges of using a deceased person’s identification. She also was charged with possessing an altered or counterfeit decal.  Apparently she was videotaped parking in the disabled spot recently, and a search of her home led to the discovery of permits issued to two people who have died.
(So…the permits were probably expired too?)
(I can’t wait to see the attack ads when election time rolls around…)
(NOT politically correct!)
-AP, Global

1. “Silent Night” (137,315 different recorded versions)
2. “White Christmas” (128,276)
3. “Jingle Bells” (89,681)
4. “The Christmas Song” (80,064)
5. “Winter Wonderland” (70,471)
6. “Santa Claus Is Coming To Town” (68,669)
7. “Have Yourself a Merry Little Christmas” (65,377)
8. “Joy To The World” (59,767)
9. “I’ll Be Home For Christmas” (56,552)
10. “Let It Snow! Let It Snow! Let It Snow!” (54,446)
(Sometimes I feel like there are only about 10 Christmas songs, total…)
(In case you are wondering, “All I Want for Christmas is You” is #30…it’s just that you hear that one version ALL THE TIME!!!)


1954 [63] Jermaine Jackson, Gary IN, pop singer (Former member of “The Jackson 5” alongside Michael Jackson, Tito Jackson, Marlon Jackson and Jackie Jackson), solo hit: ‘Let’s Get Serious’

1958 [59] Nikki Sixx (Frank Ferranno), San Jose CA, rock bassist (Motley Crue-‘Dr. Feelgood’, ‘Girls Girls Girls’)

1967 [50] Mo’Nique (Monique Imes), Baltimore MD, movie actress (“Precious”; TV/”The Parkers” 1999-2004)

1981 [36] Zacky Vengeance (Baker), Olympia WA, metal rock guitarist-vocalist (Avenged Sevenfold-‘So Far Away’, ‘Buried Alive’)

1984 [33] Xosha Roquemore, LA CA, TV actress (‘Tamra’ on “The Mindy Project” 2013-17)/movie actress (“The Butler”, “Precious”)

1986 [31] Karla Souza, Mexico City, Mexico, TV actress (‘Laurel Castillo’ on “How to Get Away With Murder” since 2014)

1996 [21] Hailee Steinfeld, LA CA, movie actress (“Pitch Perfect 2″, “True Grit”) COMING UP…Pitch Perfect 3, 2017

• “Green Monday” an online retail industry term similar to “Cyber Monday”.  It was coined by eBay to describe its best sales day in December, usually the 2nd Monday of the month.

• “International Mountain Day”, first declared by the UN in 2002 to draw attention to the important role that mountainous regions play in our water and food supply.  (OK…but why?)

• “National Noodle Ring Day”, a noodle ring is, rather predictably, made from noodles – especially flat, tagliatelle type egg noodles.  It’s made using a ring mold, or a Bundt tray, with ingredients including cheese, eggs, and flour along with the noodles. When it’s pressed out of its tray, you’ve got a thick ring of delicious noodles baked to perfection.

• “UNICEF Birthday”, the anniversary of the creation of UNICEF in1946.  What does it stand for?  ‘The United Nations International Children’s Emergency Fund’

[Tues] Gingerbread House Day
[Tues] Poinsettia Day
[Wed] National Violin Day
[Wed] The Start of Hanukkah
This Week Is…Human Rights Week
This Month Is…National Tie Month

2005 [12] Matt Damon weds Argentine-born Luciana Barrosa  at the Manhattan Marriage Bureau near New York City Hall

2014 [03] The number of Instagram subscribers overtakes Twitter, 300 million+ monthly users to 284 million

2006 [11] ‘All I Want For Christmas Is You’ by Mariah Carey becomes the first ringtone certified Gold for sales of over 500,000

2000 [17] MLB shortstop Alex Rodriguez agrees to a $252 million-deal with the Texas Rangers, then most lucrative contract with any sports team (current record: the 13-year, $325 million deal of Miami Marlins outfielder Giancarlo Stanton)

2014 [03] Detroit, Michigan emerges from the largest municipal bankruptcy in US history


✓ Only 5% of Twitter users have more than 100 followers.
✓ The peak relationship breakup times are two weeks before Christmas and the beginning of March.
✓ That ‘stomach in your mouth’ feeling you get on a roller-coaster is from your organs actually floating inside of you.
✓ About a quarter of the world’s hazelnuts (nearly 100,000 tons a year) are used to make Nutella.
✓ There is no mention of Humpty Dumpty being an egg in the nursery rhyme.
✓ Wasabi was originally used to kill bacteria.

• Pepper-spraying a perfume tester.
• Repeatedly asking a menswear salesman to measure your inseam.
• Blocking the down escalator for an hour while doing a Stairmaster workout.
• Shouting repeatedly from a dressing room, “Boy, do I look weird naked!”
• Licking the mannequins.
-First Published in BS in 2016

• The Santa hired for the party arrives handcuffed to his parole officer.
• A camera crew is there from the new reality show: Bad Office Parties, Christmas Edition.
• Stockings are stuffed with the office supplies you already had.
• Everyone’s arrested for listening to an illegally downloaded Bing Crosby CD.
• Instead of “The Night Before Christmas,” boss recites employees’ personal e-mails.
• Party expenses are deducted from your 401K.
• The caterer: Chef Boy-ar-dee.
• This year, it’s your turn to be the pinata.
• Party consists of you, Harvey Weinstein, and a whole lot of mistletoe
-Adapted from Neloo

☎ What’s the worst first impression you know you left on someone?
What’s the worst first impression that someone’s ever left on you?

I went bobsleighing the other day, killed around 250 bobs.

Question:  90% of us have at least 20 of these tucked away.  What is it?
Answer:  Gift bags

When one teaches, two learn.

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