Monday, December 18, 2017       Edition: #6021

100% Grade A Bull!

“The Bull Sheet” is shutting down for the holidays December 25th-January 1st inclusive. All subscribers will be awarded account credits for missed service days.  Following Dec. 22, the next edition of “BS” will be January 2, 2018. Thanks for a successful year of BS and Happy Holidays, all!

★ “Star Wars: The Last Jedi” made $45 million on Thursday night, making it the second highest domestic preview of all time. Box office numbers for the preview night of ‘Episode VIII’ is second only to its prequel, ‘Star Wars: The Force Awakens’, which made $57 million when it opened in 2015.
★ Women will be wearing black at the Golden Globes.  Female attendees at this year’s award show will wear all-black to protest sexual assault and harassment against women.  The idea was started by a small group of actresses who all decided to wear the color in solidarity, but it has since spread to include a growing list of attendees.
★ There’s a new controversy brewing surrounding the #MeToo movement and it is between Alyssa Milano and Matt Damon. Milano wrote an open letter to Damon after he made controversial statements in an interview with Peter Travers.  Damon addressed the culture of sexual harassment, but instead of siding with women who are bravely speaking out for the first time, he stated that not all sexual misconduct belongs in the same category.  He also made statements regarding the current “culture of outrage.”
★ Actress, producer, television star and entrepreneur Oprah Winfrey will be honored with the 2018 Cecil B. de Mille Award at the 75th Annual Golden Globe Awards.  The award is given “to a talented individual who has made an incredible impact on the world of entertainment.”  Past honorees include Barbra Streisand, Denzel Washington, Sidney Poitier, George Clooney, Martin Scorsese, Meryl Streep, and Steven Spielberg.  For 25 years, Winfrey was host of the award-winning talk show “The Oprah Winfrey Show.” As Chairman and CEO, she’s guiding her  cable network, ‘OWN: Oprah Winfrey Network’.  She is also the founder of ‘O’, The Oprah Magazine, and oversees Harpo Films.  Seth Myers will host the Golden Globes on Jan. 7.
★ David and Victoria Beckham are planning to build a huge treehouse at their lavish house in England.  The couple bought their plush home near London last year for $8.6 million and have asked the council for planning permission to erect a thatched treehouse in their garden for their four children; Brooklyn, 18, Romeo, 15, Cruz, 12, and Harper, six, to play in.
(Well, maybe the 6 year-old will use it…)
★ Bruce Gray, known to many as the father of the groom in ‘My Big Fat Greek Wedding’ and to fellow Canadians for playing investment banker Adam Cunningham on the 1990s TV drama ‘Traders’, has died at the age of 81 after a bout with brain cancer.  Bruce Grey also starred in the Canadian TV series ‘High Hopes’, and guest starred on series like Beverley Hills 90210, Chicago Hope, Murphy Brown, and Melrose Place.  He also played Ted Hartley, Jessica’s harried publisher on ‘Murder She Wrote’ for 10 years starting in 1984.

• “Jimmy Kimmel Live” (ABC/Global):  Dwayne Johnson, Guillermo del Toro, G-Eazy featuring Halsey ( R )
• “The Tonight Show starring Jimmy Fallon” (NBC/CTV):  Anna Kendrick, Rhett & Link, Randy Newman
• “The Late Show with Stephen Colbert” (CBS/Global): Jim Gaffigan, Cristela Alonzo, the Avett Brothers ( R )
• “Late Night with Seth Meyers” (NBC/CTV):  Kenny Chesney, Aaron Sorkin
• ” The Late Late Show with James Corden” (CBS/CTV):  Anna Faris, Mark Hamill, Jenny Slate, Foster the People ( R )
• “Conan” (TBS/Comedy): Stephen Colbert, Rod Man ( R )
• “Watch What Happens Live” (Bravo):  Anna Camp, Jamie Bell
• “The View” (ABC/CTV):  Andra Day, Common, Jenifer Lewis ( R )
• “The Talk” (CBS): Rebecca Hall, Charlie Puth, guest co-host Carrie Ann Inaba ( R )
• “Live with Kelly and Ryan” (ABC/CTV):  Jessica Chastain, Carley Roney, guest co-host Anderson Cooper
• “The Ellen DeGeneres Show” (NBC/CTV):  Laura Dern ( R )
• “The Voice” (NBC): The final four artists perform for the judges.
• “The Hollywood Walk of Fame Honors” (CW): Hosted by Montel Williams. A look back at celebrations for Amy Adams, Adam Levine, Hugh Laurie, Viola Davis, Chris Pratt, George Segal, Allison Janney, Ice Cube, Keri Russel, Jason Bateman, John Goodman, Jeffrey Tambor, Goldie Hawn & Kurt Russell. The special will features a brand-new star unveiling and tribute to popstar Selena.
• “The Year in Memoriam 2017” (ABC): A celebration of legendary stars and icons who passed away in 2017, including Mary Tyler Moore, Don Rickles, Glen Campbell, Tom Petty, Chuck Berry and Jerry Lewis.
• “The Great Christmas Light Fight” (ABC): The Season 5 finale.

• Justin Bieber – his daily goals, according to a recent Instagram story:
1. Find 5 ways to be generous
2. Set 5 things that you want to accomplish
3. Face 5 things you have been running from
4. Give up 5 bad habits
5. Eat 5 healthy meals
(Is #2 redundant?)
• Ariana Grande – is working on the follow-up to ‘Dangerous Woman’.  She has revealed that she’s hard at work on her next full-length effort, posting photos from a recording studio on an Instagram story.
• Cardi B – went all out for her fiancé, Migos rapper Offset, for his 26th birthday.  She gave him a flashy new Rolls Royce for the occasion.  Oh, and a glittery new watch.  (What? The Rolls doesn’t have a clock in it?)
• Haim – the trio of Jewish sisters have a new Hanukkah song.  They teased it on Twitter last week with the caption: “The first night of Haimukkah.  Sandler we’re coming for you”, a reference to Adam Sandler’s classic ‘The Hanukkuh Song’.
• Eminem – Apparently Beyonce wasn’t his first choice to join him on the song ‘Walk on Water’. His long-time collaborator Denaun Porter says Em initially wanted Adele on the song but she couldn’t do it because she was having voice issues at the time.
• Paul Stanley and Sammy Hagar – the two Rock Hall of Famers have offered their congratulations to the Class of 2018, but in doing so, they echoed their long-standing issues with the Hall’s methods of determining who deserves to be enshrined. Hagar Tweeted: “Congratulations to all the inductees especially Bon Jovi who was kept off the ballot for so long and when nominated swept the votes unanimously! It just goes to show the people are the ones that should always control the vote.”  Stanley was more blunt:  “Great to see the [Hall] with little choice while choking on its own stagnant, toxic air, except to open its eyes, ears and doors to survive by reluctantly becoming what it was meant to be all along.”
• Steve Miller – has announced a Spring 2018 tour of Canada with Peter Frampton. He will also be playing two dates in the upper American Midwest.  The first show is April 14 in Victoria BC.
• Elton John – If rumors are true, don’t expect to see him at the Grammy Awards.  He allegedly plans to boycott the ceremony, and it’s all because of Ed Sheeran.  Sheeran was mentored by John,  and was  was surprisingly shut out of this year’s major Grammy categories, earning only two nods: ‘Best Pop Vocal Album’ (Divide) and ‘Best Pop Solo Performance’ (‘Shape of You’).
• Luke Bryan – brightened the holidays for patients and staff at New York City’s Lenox Hill hospital with a recent visit where he shared gifts and live music.  His visit was in conjunction with the charity  ‘Musicians on Call’, to launch the hospital’s new Music Pharmacy program.
• Kenny Chesney – Among his many good deeds after hurricanes Irma and Maria devastated the U.S. Virgin Islands, he has been credited with rescuing more than 250 abandoned animals.  Chesney established ‘Love for Love City’, a foundation dedicated to providing aid to victims of hurricane Irma, which also spearheaded rescue efforts for animals affected by the storms.

Doesn’t it feel great to WACK that snooze button when your alarm goes off on a cold Monday morning?  Or, really, ANY morning for that matter.  So of course, the experts are going to tell us that it’s the exact wrong thing to do, right?  Right.  Dr. Daniel Barone, a neurologist at New York Presbyterian Hospital and assistant professor of neurology at Weill Cornell Medical College, says that the problem is that when you wake up 9 minutes later or 15 minutes later, your brain is essentially confused.  The problem is that waking up and falling asleep is not like an on-off switch.  We do not fall asleep immediately and we do not wake up immediately.  Falling asleep and waking up is a  process. It can take a couple of hours in some cases for the brain to neurochemically prepare itself to wake up.  It’s not bad for you but it does mess your brain up a little bit.  When the alarm goes off again, you may feel even worse than you did before because your brain is not sure if it should be trying to wake up or if it should be trying to fall back asleep.  What does he recommend?  Never use the snooze button.  Just set the alarm for the latest you can wake up, and when the alarm sounds….get up!
(So he calls hitting the snooze button just once ‘confusing to the brain’.  I call hitting the snooze button once ‘amateur hour’!)
(I prefer to save all my snoozing for later when I’m at the office!)
(Yeah, it’s awesome to start every day by doing the worst possible thing…)

Everyone expects to get a little something for Christmas from their boss.  But what if you work for the Queen?  Wouldn’t you think that if you toil day in and day out for one of the richest people in the world, that you would be treated, ahem, ROYALLY come bonus time?  Apparently that is not the case.  It turns out the monarch’s 1,500 staff do receive a gift during the festive season.  Pudding.  Yep.  Pudding.  The 91-year-old royal gives each of her employees a Christmas pudding to take home to their families. The tradition was started by her grandfather, George V, and has carried on for decades.  According to royal sources, the Queen has been in cost-cutting mode this year.  So where once she sourced her Christmas puddings from high-end stores such as Harrods and Fortnum & Mason, this year she has gone for a slightly more budget-friendly product.  Royal employees will be receiving a pudding from Tesco. Tesco’s Finest Matured Christmas Pudding…costing £8, to be precise.  Those who have given their entire life to serve Her Majesty are given a little something extra.  Vouchers.
(And if you did a really good job, maybe she WON’T give you pudding!)
(Better than getting a fruitcake…but not much!)
(Well, she DOES have to buy a new dress for the wedding…)

Cereal company Kellogg has opened a new store in New York that it hopes will become a hot spot for millennials to buy cereal by the bowl and then hang out on bean bag chairs.  Cereal sales have been lagging lately, and after recently advertising their product as a late-night snack, ‘Kellogg’s NYC’ offers their products at a trendy venue where people of a certain age might want to stop in for a $1.50 bowl of Froot Loops or Frosted Flakes.  Bonus: Cereals can be topped with things like sea salt, candied cashews or any of about 30 other ingredients, and top out around $7.50  The store also sells Pop-Tarts, coffee drinks and different flavors of milk.
(If  I’m paying $7.50 for a bowl of cereal, it had better be spoon fed to me by Tony the Tiger!)
NET: The menu…it actually looks pretty awesome:

1.  Mark Wahlberg:  Box office return: $4.40 for every $1 he was paid.
2.  Christian Bale: $6.70
3.  Channing Tatum: $7.60
4.  Denzel Washington: $10.40
5.  Brad Pitt: $11.50
(On the plus side, they figure Wahlberg made about $68 million, so multiply that by 4.40, and its not like they didn’t still make a ton of dough off of him!)


1943 [74] Keith Richards, Dartford UK, classic rock guitarist (Rolling Stones-‘Start Me Up’, ‘Satisfaction’)/Rock & Roll Hall of Fame (1989)

1946 [71] Steven Spielberg, Cincinnati OH, movie director-producer (“Indiana Jones” films, “Jurassic Park” films) COMING UP…Ready Player One, 2018

1954 [63] Ray Liotta, Newark NJ, movie actor (“The Place Beyond the Pines”, “Goodfellas”)/TV actor (“Shades of Blue”, since 2016)

1963 [54] Brad Pitt, Shawnee OK, movie actor (“12 Years a Slave”, “Moneyball”) COMING UP…Ad Astra, 2019

1975 [42] Sia (Furler), Adelaide, Australia, pop singer (‘Elastic Heart’, ‘Chandelier’)

1975 [42] Randy Houser, Lake MS, country singer (‘How Country Feels’, ‘Runnin’ Outta Moonlight’)

1978 [39] Katie Holmes, Toledo OH, movie actress (“Batman Begins”, “First Daughter”)/TV actress (“The Kennedys” 2011, “Dawson’s Creek” 1998-2003)/Mrs Tom Cruise 2006-12. COMING UP… Dear Dictator, 2018

1980 [37] Christina Aguilera, Staten Island NY, TV personality (“The Voice” 2011-2016)/pop singer (“Beautiful”, “Genie In a Bottle”)/5 Grammy Awards/30 million+ albums sold worldwide

1989 [28] Ashley Benson, Anaheim CA, TV actress (‘Hanna Marin’ on “Pretty Little Liars” 2010-17)/movie actress (“Spring Breakers”)

• “Answer the Telephone Like Buddy the Elf Day”. The idea is to answer: “Buddy the Elf, what’s your favorite color?”, a quote that comes straight from the 2003 Will Ferrell movie.

• “International Migrants Day”, a day of solidarity for migrant workers, on the anniversary of the UN’s 1990 adoption of the International Convention On the Protection Of the Rights of All Migrants Workers & Members of Their Families. (Catchy name.)

• “Roast Suckling Pig Day”.  Here [co-host], put this apple in your mouth!”

• “Bake Cookies Day”. What’s the best kind of homemade cookie: Chocolate Chip, Oatmeal-Raisin, or Peanut Butter?

• “Flake Appreciation Day”, a fun day created to encourage us to take notice of snow flakes and to be mesmerized by each one that falls.

• “Wear a Plunger On Your Head Day” for some unknown reason. Something to do with your potty mouth maybe?

[Tues] Oatmeal Muffin Day
[Tues] Holly Day
[Wed] Games Day
[Wed] Go Caroling Day
This Week Is…Gluten-free Baking Week
This Month Is…Worldwide Food Service Safety Month

1966 [51] Dr. Seuss’ “How the Grinch Stole Christmas” airs on TV for 1st time

2009 [08] “Avatar”, directed by James Cameron, opens in movie theaters (with a reported budget of $300 million-plus, it’s said to be the most expensive movie ever made; fortunately it’s also the most successful, with $2.8 billion in worldwide box office.  ‘Avatar 2′ is slated for release in 2020)

1983 [34] With Mick Jagger serving as best man, Keith Richards weds longtime girlfriend Patti Hansen on his 40th birthday in Cabo San Lucas, Mexico

2006 [11] United Arab Emirates holds its 1st-ever elections


✓ Students can remember about 30% more information when doodling in class.
✓ Adults spend more time each morning checking emails than eating breakfast, according to a study.
✓ About 68% of people experience “phantom vibration syndrome” where you mistakenly think your phone is buzzing in your pocket.
✓ Using iTunes to build nuclear weapons is against their terms of service.
✓ Drunk men smile more often than drunk women.

• You’ve got red and green bags under your eyes
• You’re serving reindeer pot pie
• When you hear, “Sleigh bells ring, are you listenin’?,” you scream, “No! I’m not listening!”
• You climb on your roof and start shooting carolers with your BB gun
• You think you hear your Christmas tree taunting you
• Instead of spending time with family, you’re watching some guy make photo copies
• You’re busted for running through town wearing nothing but mistletoe
• You’ve got eggnog coming out of your ears
• Your standard response, “Happy freakin’ holidays to you too”
• You opt to stay in bed until April

● The “Sunbeam Six-Slice Shower Toaster.”
● “Hickory Farms Smoked Gristle Assortment.”
● “The Black & Decker Forehead Sander.”
● “The Craftmatic Adjustable Groin-Puller.”
● “Super-Itchy Slipper Socks” from Super-Itchy Technologies.
● “Lick Me – The Board Game.”
● “Isotoner Diapers.”
● “Bag o’ Live Weasels.
(First published in BS in 2014)

☎ What’s the story behind your oldest Christmas tree decoration?

I’d love to know what the media would do if there was ever a scandal about a gate.

Question:  10% of families will do this before breakfast on Christmas morning. What?
Answer:  Argue.

The greatest danger for most of us is not that our aim is too high and we miss it, but that it is too low and we reach it.

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