Monday, December 7, 2015        Edition: #5587

Thanks For Being On Our Sheet List!

★ Caitlyn Jenner is facing a yet another lawsuit over that car crash back in February. Music composer-producer Peter Wolf-Millesi (“We Built This City”), his wife, and his mother-in-law are suing Jenner for injuries they suffered in the Malibu CA accident. The couple’s young children are also named as plaintiffs in the lawsuit filed on Friday in LA. They are seeking unspecified damages for pain and suffering, medical bills, and future loss of earnings.
★ One of Scott Weiland’s The Wildabouts bandmates, bassist Tommy Black, has now been arrested for cocaine possession after the drug was discovered on the tour bus where Weiland’s body was found Thursday night. The frontman, who had a history of substance abuse, died in his sleep shortly before his band was set to perform in Bloomington MN. A second small cache of cocaine was discovered by police in the bedroom where the singer’s body was found.
★ And Simon Cowell’s home has been burgled while he and his family slept. A thief (or thieves) targeted the $15 million-home of the music mogul in the middle of the night Friday while he and partner Lauren Silverman and baby son Eric were sleeping upstairs. The heist is said to have netted jewelry and a 6-figure sum of cash. After sneaking onto the property the perp(s) spotted a key to the safe and emptied it before fleeing. Cowell learned of the burglary after being woken by his personal security. Police inquiries continue but there have been no arrests as yet.
– “Daily Mail”

• “Conan” (TBS/CTV) – Sharon Jones & Te Dap-Kings (“It’s a Holiday Soul Party”).
• “The Great Christmas Light Fight” (ABC) – The reality TV competition returns for a 3rd season as families and neighborhoods deck their halls and homes with hopes of winning a $50,000 prize for the most over-the-top decorations. One competing display features 500,000 lights.
• “Jimmy Kimmel Live” (ABC/CityTV) – Rick Ross (“Black Market”).
• “Last Call With Carson Daly” (NBC) – Drenge (“Undertow”).
• “Late Late Show With James Corden” (CBS/M3) – Coldplay (“A Head Full of Dreams”).
• “Late Show With Stephen Colbert” (CBS/Global) – Jennifer Hudson (“JHUD”).
• “The Real” (syndicated) – Kirk Franklin (“Losing My Religion”).
• “Tonight Show Starring Jimmy Fallon” (NBC/CTV2) – Logic (“Under Pressure”).
• “U2: Innocence + Experience Live in Paris” (HBO) – A same-day special showcasing their live show at Bercy Arena in Paris, France. The event was postponed after November’s Friday the 13th bombings in the city. It’s the final concert of the tour.
• “The Voice” (NBC/CTV2) – The remaining 9 singers perform for audience votes.

• Adele – Already the fastest-selling album ever, “25” has hit yet another music milestone. Her unstoppable 3rd album has sold more than 1 million copies in its 2nd week, making it the 1st album to move a million+ copies in 2 separate weeks since Nielsen began tracking sales in 1991.
• The Beatles – A Ludwig drum kit played by Ringo Starr at more than 200 Beatles performances has been sold for $2.1 million, according to Julien’s Auctions. Indianapolis Colts owner Jim Irsay submitted the winning bid Friday in Beverly Hills CA. The sale was part of a 2-day auction that featured more than 800 items owned by Starr and his wife, Barbara Bach.
• Coldplay – They’ll be part of the halftime entertainment for Super Bowl 50 in February. Sources have confirmed the news to “Billboard” and the “Wall Street Journal”, saying the Brit band will perform during the game, set for February 7th in Santa Clara CA at Levi’s Stadium.
• 50 Cent – He plays himself in “My Friend 50”, a new sitcom in development for FOX-TV. Fiddy (aka Curtis Jackson) will co-produce the show, which focuses on a young woman who joins his entourage. Jackson has been increasingly branching out into the acting and production world.
• Justin Bieber – His “Love Yourself” replaces his “I’m Sorry” at #1 on the official singles chart in the UK. The only previous self-replacements? The Beatles, Elvis Presley, John Lennon.
• Kanye West – North West is officially a big sister. Kanye (38) and wife Kim Kardashian (35) welcomed their 2nd child, a boy, on Saturday morning. The announcement came via a brief statement on Kim’s website: “Mother and son are doing well.” Any bets on a baby name?
• Kid Cudi – He has canceled his planned “Especial” tour, revealing on Twitter that things weren’t coming together production-wise and he’s dealing with a lot of personal problems at this time.
• Merle Haggard – The 78-year-old country legend has had to axe a series of performances over the past week as he’s hospitalized with pneumonia.

✓ If you want a cheap alternative to dryer sheets, wrap a tennis ball in aluminum foil and toss it in with your next drying cycle.
✓ To clean a wall of crayon markings, spray WD-40 on the spot and lightly rub it in. Then wipe the wall down with a soapy towel afterwards to pull off the oily residue from the WD-40.
✓ Honey is a powerful ally when it comes to healing wounds. Just rub a bit on your next cut for a powerful and sweet disinfectant. Does an excellent job at killing bacteria due to its high acid content and ability to dehydrate bacteria.
✓ Tea bags are multi-functional items which can be used as anything from a deodorizer to a fire-starter. To use them as kindling, stuff dry teabags into a toilet paper tube. The lint from your dryer also makes great kindling and can be stuffed in before lighting the tube ablaze.
✓ The most common folk remedy for a cellphone which has taken an unexpected liquid dip is a blow-dryer and uncooked rice. For a more effective solution, plunge your phone in some far-more-absorbent kitty litter instead.
✓ Chemicals present on the inside of banana peels make it a great silver polish. Blend the peels with a little water to create a paste which will bring back the shine on your cutlery with just a bit of rubbing.
✓ Avoid snorkel mask fog by mixing together 1 tablespoon of baby shampoo and 2 tablespoons of water. Rub it on the lenses then lightly rinse to keep the goggles fog-free.
✓ When making a pie crust, switch out the water with cold vodka. The vodka makes dough easier to manage and will evaporate during baking, resulting in a light and flaky crust.
✓ Nail polish can be used to dip a thread into before attempting to thread a needle. Makes it easy-peasy!
✓ Clear out what you can from a clogged drain then pour in a cup of baking soda and a the same amount of vinegar. After 5 minutes, pour boiling water down the drain to flush it out.
– Adapted from

Can you feel the love tonight? For those Disney enthusiasts who are still waiting for the right partner, there’s a new tool to expedite the process. ‘MouseMingle’, the first dating site for hardcore Disney fans, launched last week and is already experiencing technical difficulties due to an overload of users. It’s free to view user photos and profiles on the site, but finding ‘happily ever’ after has a price: There’s a monthly membership fee of $12.55 if you want to contact someone. The site’s profiles are created based on users’ answers to questions about Disney songs, Disney movies, and Disney merchandise. (Oh for a love like Mickey & Minnie’s!)
– “Los Angeles Magazine”

Hard to believe, but these are real products currently available online …
• ‘Bacon Candy Canes’ (6 for $6.95) – Get the snappy scent and yummy flavor of bacon in your favorite Christmas candy. Look like plain old red & white striped canes; taste like fried pork bellies.
• ‘Emergency Santa Kit’ ($12.95) – Your one-stop resource for all ‘Emergency Santa’ needs. Includes a Santa hat and an inflatable beard packed in a tin can (to keep them fresh?).
• ‘Shouting Snowballs with Sounds’ ($4.95) – These faux-balls are soft, squishy, and full of attitude. Press the button and hear them make wacky noises as you toss ’em. (Incoming!)
• ‘Reindeer Hoodie’ ($19.95) – This soft, brown fur-like hoodie is perfect for cold Winter nights and the cute little antlers projecting out the top will help you move through the forest.
– BS Original

Australia’s Sydney Philharmonia choir is performing a version of Handel’s Messiah at the Sydney Opera House alongside a second choir using only sign language. It’s believed to be the world’s first such simultaneous performance. The signing choir uses Auslan, the Australian sign language, plus gestures and movements that are easily recognizable by non-signing concert-goers. The choir has adopted numerous ways to perform the word ‘hallelujah’, which appears repeatedly in the famous choral work. More than half the members of the signing choir are deaf but the remainder are hearing people who are fluent in Auslan. (Handel’s hymn can cause hand hernias.)
– Fairfax Media

Each December, Pantone’s Color Institute chooses a ‘Color Of the Year’ for the upcoming year as a way of trend forecasting and capturing the global zeitgeist. A year ago it chose ‘Marsala’, a deep wine-red that ‘enriches the mind, body, and soul’. Now, for the first time ever, Pantone has announced not one, but 2 colors for next year: ‘Rose Quartz’, a pale shade of pink; and ‘Serenity’, a light pastel blue. You may be thinking, “Hey, those sound like baby colors”, and you’re not totally wrong. One of the reasons Pantone has picked 2 colors for 2016 – and those two in particular – is to challenge traditional associations between color and gender. (Wasn’t color-coding baby-wear a solution to embarrassing situations when admirers mistake the sex?)
– BuzzFeed Life

How fast a person’s heart beats when resting can predict whether they are going to die early.
– “Daily Telegraph”


1949 [66] Tom Waits, Pomona CA, Grammy-nominated contemporary folk singer-songwriter (“Bad as Me”)

1977 [38] Dominic Howard, Stockport UK, rock drummer (Muse-“Uprising”, “Supermassive Black Hole”)

1979 [36] Sara Bareilles, Eureka CA, pop singer (“King of Anything”, “Love Song”)

• “Cotton Candy Day”, celebrating the sweet, sugary taste-treat that melts in your mouth. It was invented in 1897 as ‘Fairy Floss’, then renamed in 1920. In Greece, Israel, and India it is often referred to as ‘Old Woman’s Hair’. Yuck.

• “Letter Writing Day”, when we’re encouraged to take a few minutes to send someone a handwritten letter. Letter-writing has almost become a lost art. When was the last time you wrote a letter to someone, either printed or in cursive?

• “Pearl Harbor Remembrance Day”, observed on the anniversary of one of the defining moments in American history, the 1941 Japanese raid on Pearl Harbor, Hawaii which caused the US to enter WW2. It’s the 74th anniversary of the ‘date which will live in infamy’.

2001 [14] The caper movie remake, “Ocean’s Eleven”, featuring an all-star ensemble cast (George Clooney, Brad Pitt, Matt Damon, Julia Roberts) opens in theaters (spawns sequels “Ocean’s Twelve” in 2004 and “Ocean’s Thirteen” in 2007)

1991 [24] Michael Jackson’s “Black Or White” reaches #1 on singles chart; U2’s “Achtung Baby” debuts at #1 on album chart

1969 [46] 1st broadcast of holiday TV special “Frosty the Snowman”

2012 [03] Scientists in Tanzania discover the oldest-known dinosaur fossil, a 243 million-year-old relic from the extinct reptile Nyasasaurus

[Tues] “Victoria’s Secret Fashion Show” (CBS)
[Tues] Mariah Carey’s “A Christmas Melody” (Hallmark)
[Tues] Pretend to Be a Time Traveler Day
[Wed] AACTA Awards (Sydney, Australia)
[Wed] Cremation Day
[Wed] International Anti-Corruption Day

Computer Science Education Week / Hand Washing Awareness Week / International Coelenterate Biology Week / Older Driver Safety Awareness Week / Recipe Greetings For the Holidays Week


Highlight bits culled from 22 years of “Bull Sheet” back issues …
• You stay by her side for the entire office Christmas party (+1)
You stay by her side for a while, then leave to chat with a college drinking buddy (-2)
Named Tiffany (-4)
Tiffany is a dancer (-6)
With implants (-10)
• You make the bed (+1)
You make the bed, but forget to add the decorative pillows (-1)
You throw the bedspread over rumpled sheets (-5)
• You replace the toilet-paper roll when it’s empty (+1)
When the toilet-paper roll is barren, you resort to Kleenex (-1)
When the Kleenex runs out you shuffle slowly to the next bathroom (-5)
• You go out to buy her spring-fresh extra-light pantyliners with wings (+5)
But return with beer (-10)
• You check out a suspicious noise at night (+1)
You check out a suspicious noise and it’s nothing (+2)
You check out a suspicious noise and it’s something (+5)
You pummel it with a 6-iron (+10)
It’s her father (-20)
– First published in “BS” 2001.

• Kids who refuse to believe that’s fruitcake on your breath, not rum.
• When the last guy to use the beard leaves bits of his lunch in it.
• Parents who get all uptight when you offer their kids a pinch of Skoal.
• Enduring the taunts of your old buddies from drama school.
• Two words … lap rash.
– First published in “BS” 2000.

I have to plug my phone in to recharge so often, basically I have a land line again.

☎ Which TV character reminds you of your wife or girlfriend. Why?

Which breed of domesticated cat is thought to be the world’s largest?
a. Ragdoll [CORRECT. Adult males average 22-25 pounds.]
b. Maine Coon
c. Manx
– “Weird Fact Of the Day”

Question: Car keys are the most often misplaced item, followed by THIS.
Answer: Cellphone charger.

Adulthood is like looking both ways before you cross the street and then getting hit by an airplane.

Chris Sago @, St Louis MO; Brent Bernas @ 97.5 Big FM [CJKR] Winnipeg MB; Alex Valadez @ La Invasora [KOYE] Laredo TX; Jeremy @ Tone FM Taunton UK; Cindy Hanson @ 105.1 The Kat [KGUM] Hagatña, Guam; Ken Gontarek @ Texas Country Q102 [KACQ] Lampasas TX; Graham Smith @ Every Hit, London UK; James Stratford @ Rock 97.7 [CFGP] Grande Prairie AB; and Shawn Truax @ 95.3 The Beach [KXTZ] San Luis Obispo CA.

Printer Friendly Version