December 16 2019

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Monday, December 16, 2019 – Edition: #6595

Thanks a Sheetload for Choosing “BS”!

The Bull Sheet will be shutting down for the holidays Tuesday Dec. 24-Friday Dec. 27, and also will not be publishing Wednesday Jan. 1 to observe New Year’s Day. All subscribers will receive account credits for missed service days. Thanks for a successful year of BS and Happy Holidays, all!

★ Olivia Newton-John and John Travolta reunited to reprise their iconic characters for a special “Meet n’ Grease” sing-along event on Friday, the first of three planned special screening events. Newton-John wore Sandy’s yellow skirt and white blouse while Travolta wore all black with a leather jacket to become Danny once more. Both dressed as their characters for very the first time since Grease debuted over 40 years ago in 1978. Last week, Newton-John was reunited with her original “Grease” leather jacket from the film. An anonymous buyer purchased the jacket from an auction and returned it to Newton-John.
★ Big Bang Theory” star Johnny Galecki is developing a new take on Warner Bros.’ “Vacation” franchise. He is setting up a TV series based on the Griswold family at HBO Max. “The Griswolds,” for which Galecki is currently listed only as an executive producer, will explore the daily lives of the Griswolds in the suburbs of modern-day Chicago. The half-hour comedy currently has a script development deal. Galecki played Clark Griswold’s son ‘Russ’ in 1989’s “Christmas Vacation.”
★ Tori Spelling never had to worry about money growing up, because her multi-millionaire father Aaron Spelling was one of the world’s most successful television producers. But since going out on her own – and after her dad passed away – Spelling has had some notorious financial troubles. In a recent episode of her new reality web series “Tori Tried and True”, she explained she’s never been good with money and was never taught to deal with it properly. Now that she’s in her 40s, Spelling says it’s something that’s really important to her and she is learning. She added that learning how to handle money is something she wants her kids to know before they move out on their own.
★ Jodie Foster was almost a Brady. The cast of “The Brady Bunch” (including Maureen McCormick, Eve Plumb, Susan Olsen, Barry Williams, Christopher Knight and Mike Lookinland) reunited on “Watch What Happens Live With Andy Cohen” to reminisce about their time on the classic TV program ahead of the HGTV/Food Network crossover special “A Very Brady Renovation: Holiday Edition”. During the appearance, Susan Olsen, who played ‘Cindy’, revealed that Foster competed against her for her role.

• “Jimmy Kimmel Live” (ABC/Global): J.J. Abrams, Daisy Ridley, John Boyega, Oscar Isaac, Billy Dee Williams, Anthony Daniels, Naomi Ackie, Kelly Marie Tran, Keri Russell (Note: Airing at 10 PM)
• “The Tonight Show starring Jimmy Fallon” (NBC/CTV): Michael B. Jordan, Sam Heughan, Lea Michele, Jonathan Groff
• “The Late Show with Stephen Colbert” (CBS/Global): Aaron Paul, Idina Menzel
• “Late Night with Seth Meyers” (NBC/CTV): Rep. Adam Schiff, Bowen Yang, Tyler Childers
• ” The Late Late Show with James Corden” (CBS/CTV): Taraji P. Henson, Lil Nas X, guest host Chance the Rapper
• “Conan” (TBS): Ron Funches
• “Watch What Happens Live” (Bravo): Kate Chastain, Rhylee Gerber
• “The View” (ABC/CTV): Robert De Niro
• “The Talk” (CBS): Sebastian Maniscalco, Paul Wesley
• “Live with Kelly and Ryan” (ABC/CTV): Jennifer Hudson, Thomas Schumacher, guest co-host Mark Consuelos
• “The Ellen DeGeneres Show” (NBC/CTV): Adam Sandler, Billy Crudup
• “The Kelly Clarkson Show” (CHECK LOCAL LISTINGS): Julianne & Derek Hough, Christian Siriano
• “Greatest Holiday Commercials Countdown 2019” (CW): A countdown of the world’s best holiday commercials; Kevin Frazier and Keltie Knight host.
• “Nick Cannon’s Hit Viral Videos — Holidays 2019” (FOX): Cannon and celebrity guests Kelly Osbourne, Jeannie Mai and J.B. Smoove showcase the funniest and most unbelievable viral videos.
• “Holidays With the Houghs” (NBC): Star siblings Derek and Julianne Hough host and perform a variety of holiday-themed dance numbers and comedy sketches, plus special celeb guest appearances.

• Taylor Swift — celebrated her birthday Friday with over 20,000 of her closest friends at Madison Square Garden for iHeartRadio’s annual Jingle Ball. She thanked fans, saying: “Where would I want to spend my 30th birthday? The answer is: you’re looking at it. This is the first show of the 30th year of my life.” Swift first performed at the event in 2009, when she was just turning 20.
• Drake – has debuted his own $550 Champagne. The Mod Sélection Rosé Vintage 2008—a blend of Pinot Noir, Meunier, and Chardonnay, is one of two new additions to his Mod Sélection Champagne line.
• Queen – Late singer Freddie Mercury was the most-searched music artist in 2019, according to Google. Disgraced R&B singer R. Kelly was No. 2, while the rest of the top 10 in order were: Billie Eilish, Mötley Crüe, 21 Savage, A$AP Rocky, Lil Nas X, Cody Simpson, Lizzo and Aaron Carter.
• Huey Lewis – says he contemplated suicide soon after his Meniere’s disease diagnosis. The condition causes vertigo, ringing in the ears and hearing loss that comes and goes. Now, he copes by retreating into a “cocoon,” reading more than ever, and relying on hearing aids, which sometimes help.
• Stevie Wonder — Shaquille O’Neal has people questioning whether or not Wonder is really blind…again. Shaq said that while riding an elevator together, Wonder “comes in, says ‘what’s up Shaq.’ Presses the button, gets off on his floor by himself, goes to his room.”
• Paul McCartney – says he has recorded a Christmas album – but he’s never going to release it. Macca says it’s just for his family: ”Years ago I thought, there’s not very good Christmas records. So, I actually went into my studio over a couple of years and I made one.” He says he has eight grandchildren to be ”indoctrinated” with his festive tunes.
• Luke Combs — Luke Combs closed out the first night of his two-night sold-out shows at Nashville’s Bridgestone Arena on Thursday by bringing Keith Urban on stage to join him for his hit single ‘Hurricane’.
• Thomas Rhett — will hit the road again in 2020. “The Center Point Road Tour”, which supports his album of the same name, gets underway on May 29 in Gilford, New Hampshire, and winds up on Aug. 29 in Bristow, Virginia. Cole Swindell and HARDY will open.
• The Grand Ole Opry – is returning to television on the new Circle Network —or at least portions of the show will be. The Opry, along with expanded specialty programming tied to the country music institution and more regular rebroadcasting of vintage “Hee-Haw episodes”, will all be part of programming on the network, which will launch on January 1st.

Millennials take a lot of flak (if that’s a work that’s still ‘on fleek’) for being “snowflakes”, but according to a new study, baby boomers are the most hypersensitive and narcissistic generation. The survey of 750 people between 13 and 77 in the journal “Psychology and Aging” found that, contrary to what many people think, those who were born earlier in the century show higher levels of hyper-sensitivity, or the type of narcissism where people are full of themselves, as well as willfulness, which is the tendency to impose opinions on others.
(Maybe they wouldn’t be so sensitive if millennials hadn’t gone and wrecked department stores and soap!)
(Are boomers self absorbed? I’m sure they’ve thought a lot about just that…)
(Maybe we shouldn’t be saying bad things about our parents until we’ve moved out of their basement!)

I’m not exactly sure it’s something that you want to put on your Christmas list, but a company called Beetl Robotics has introduced what is probably the world’s first ‘Pooper Scooper Robot’. The machine, which looks a lot like a toy tractor, finds and automatically scoops up your dog’s piles, so you’ll never have to do the dirty work again. The “Beetl” is equipped with computer vision and front cameras, and once it detects the doo-doo, the robot moves directly over it and uses a mechanical claw to scoop it up. It has its own sealed container to hold on to things until the dog owner has a chance to empty it. Beetl’s sensors also allow it to avoid obstacles along the way, and to stay within the set perimeters of your lawn. The Beetl is still in the testing stage, so for now, keep that shovel and bucket handy.
(You’ve heard of a ‘dung-beetle’ haven’t you?)
(I don’t know which would be worse: Picking up after my dog, or having to empty one of those things!)
(It’s funny, because usually robots take the GOOD jobs away from humans!)

(According to the people who transcribe for closed-captioning….)
➢ Chernobyl: The site of the world’s worst nuclear disaster is correctly pronounced chair-nOHble.
➢ Deter:  Discouraging something by instilling fear — dee-tUHR
➢ Greta Thunberg:  The teen activist’s name goes like this — grAY-tah tOOn-bairyeh
➢ Rami Malek:  The actor who won the Best Actor Oscar for his portrayal of Freddie Mercury in “Bohemian Rhapsody”, and will play the villain in the upcoming James Bond movie — rAH-mee MA-lik
➢ Pete Buttigieg:  The mayor of South Bend, Indiana and Democratic presidential hopeful’s name is pronounced pEET bUt-ij-ij (The only reason I knew that is from watching SNL!)
➢ Notre Dame:  The iconic cathedral in Paris that partially burned in April — nOH-truh dAHm
➢ Tokimeku:  Japanese word translated as “to flutter.” Made popular by organizing guru Marie Kondo to describe the joy of … neat — pronounced toh-kee-mE-koo (And with Christmas coming, if you have kids, it’s not a word you’ll have to worry about for a while!)

➠ Make a list and set budgets:  A list can save you from making extra trips to the mall to shop for that one person you forgot, and a budget can help you save money.
➠ Assign a day and time to do your shopping:  Once you’ve done this, plan your route – and get going!  (My wife needs to assign DAYS to do her shopping!)
➠ Avoid the busiest shopping days:  The Saturday before Christmas is usually the busiest shopping day of the season. The best days? Tuesday, Wednesday and Thursday mornings.
➠ Start at the back of the store:  Most people start with what catches their eye at the front of the store. These items may have already been picked over. You might still find some gems in the lesser-travelled areas. (“Here, I got you these dusty firecrackers…”)
(Tip #5: Have it done before December 16th!)

‘Jingle bells’ were originally attached to the harnesses of horse-drawn sleighs as a form of warning device to help avoid collisions at blind intersections.


1941 [78] Lesley Stahl, Lynn MA, extremely well-preserved (renovated?) TV journalist (“60 Minutes” since 1991)

1949 [70] Billy Gibbons, Houston TX, classic rock guitarist/singer (ZZ Top-‘Legs’, ‘Tush’)

1963 [56] Benjamin Bratt, San Francisco CA, TV actor (“Star” 2016, “Private Practice” 2011-13)/movie actor (“Doctor Strange”, “Miss Congeniality”)

1975 [44] Benjamin Kowalewicz, Montréal QC, rock singer (Billy Talent-‘Stand Up and Run’, ‘Rusted From the Rain’)

1981 [38] Krysten Ritter, Bloomsburg PA, TV actress (“Jessica Jones” 2015-15, “Don’t Trust the B— in Apartment 23” 2012-13)/movie actress (“Veronica Mars”, “Big Eyes”)

1984 [35] Theo James, Oxford UK, movie actor (“The Divergent” series)

1986 [33] Dave Rublin, Maplewood NJ, rock bassist-keyboardist (American Authors-‘Best Day Of My Life’, ‘Believer’)

• “Chocolate Covered Anything Day”. What unusual food enveloped in chocolate have you eaten? Chocolate-covered coffee beans … mmm!

• “Las Posadas” begins, the traditional 9-day Mexican Christmas celebration that includes breaking open a piñata. Similarly, “Simbang Gabi” in the Philippines runs today through January 6th, said to be the world’s longest Christmas celebration.

• “Stupid Toy Day”, a half-hearted salute to some of the bad inventions marketed for kids.

• “Tea Party Day” in Boston MA, anniversary  of the original 1773 ‘Boston Tea Party’, a protest over taxation by American colonists. (A holiday for Glenn Beck?)

[Tues] Maple Syrup Day
[Tues] Wright Brothers Day
[Wed] Bake Cookies Day
[Wed] Flake Appreciation Day
This Month Is…Write a Business Pam Month
This Month Is…Safe Toys and Gifts Month

2010 [09] “Larry King Live” ends after 25 years on CNN as the then-77-year-old host retires

2003 [16] Shania Twain becomes the first woman with three Diamond albums when her fourth album, “Up!” is certified with 10 million in sales. Her second and third albums, “The Woman in Me” (1995) and “Come On Over” (1997) also went Diamond.

2013 [06] “Heat” magazine reports that Miley Cyrus has insured her infamous tongue for $1 million

2011 [08] Swedish House Mafia plays the 1st-ever EDM event at NYC’s Madison Square Garden

1998 [21] Kevin Cole of Carlsbad NM sets a new world record by blowing 7 inches of spaghetti out of his nose, beating the previous record of 5 inches (mom must be so proud)


✓ Rudolph the Red-Nosed Reindeer was invented in 1938 as a marketing gimmick to get kids to buy holiday coloring books.
✓ The tallest Christmas tree ever cut was a 221-foot Douglas fir that was displayed in 1950 at a Seattle mall.
✓ Many parts of the Christmas tree can be eaten. Needles are a good source of Vitamin C.
✓ Christmas caroling began as an English custom called “wassailing”, which was toasting neighbors to a long life.
✓ Reindeer antlers grow at a rate of more than an inch a day, making them the fastest growing tissue of any mammal.
✓ In Icelandic folklore, the Yule Cat will eat anyone who does not receive new clothes by Christmas Eve.

• Silent Night of the Lambs
• Grandma Got Made Over by a Reindeer
• Home But Not Alone
• Rudolph the Brown-Nosed Reindeer
• Jersey Shore on Ice
• Bill Cosby presents “Baby It’s Cold Outside”
• There’s Something About Mary’s Boy Child
• Ho Ho Homocide
• Anything on the Hallmark Channel with a sad ending.
• Anything with Lori Loughlin

Best of BS . . .
• Christmas Cream
• Eggs: The Drink
• Congealed Dairy Product
• Alcoholic Egg Goop
• Beige Sugar Milk
• Drinkable Egg Syrup
• Holiday Chicken-Baby Refreshment
• Caloric Egg Slurry
• Melted Ice Cream With a Bonus of Raw Eggs
• Try-Not-to-Think-About-It-Too-Much Egg Cocktail
– Adapted from, first published in ‘BS’ in 2014

“Sesame Street” characters do impressions of each other:

Those roadside sobriety tests are getting ridiculous. Last night, I had to fold a fitted sheet…

• What modern-day Christmas custom is borrowed from ancient Rome’s New Year celebration?
a. Putting up mistletoe. [CORRECT. It was part of “Saturnalia”, the week-long festival honoring Saturn the planter god. The event also initiated the lasting traditions of exchanging gifts, illuminating lights, and closing businesses.]
b. Decorating a tree.
c. Hanging stockings by the fireplace.
d. Spending way too much money and drinking way too much.

• What Christmas food is made from “marsh-whorts”?
a. Stuffing
b. Christmas pudding
c. Cranberry sauce [CORRECT]
d. Roast warthog
– TriviaPark, ChristmasTrivia

What is your favorite holiday treat?

Question:  The most eagerly anticipated Christmas activity is decorating the tree. THIS comes in a close second. What is it?
Answer:  Desserts

Forget all the reasons why it won’t work and believe the one reason why it will.


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