Thursday, February 14, 2019 – Edition: #6394
Happy Valentine’s Day, For Sheet’s Sake!
BS SUBSCRIBER NOTE:
“The Bull Sheet” will not be publishing on Monday, February 18 to observe the Canadian ‘Family Day’ holiday. All subscribers will receive credit for the missed service day. The Bull Sheet will resume publication on Tuesday, February 19.
BS SHOW BIZ BUZZ:
★ Sony Pictures are brewing up a “Breaking Bad” themed line of beer. Hank Schraeder may be long gone, but his special home brewed beer will continue to live on with Sony, which plans on producing and marketing a line of “Schraderbräu”. The name comes from Dean Norris’ character ‘Hank Schraeder’ on “Breaking Bad.” In the show, Hank is seen bottling his German style lager and even created a nifty looking 6-pack with his own face on the logo.
(If it’s anything like MY home-brew, they should have called it “Making Bad…beer.”)
-TheBlast
★ Oscar favourite Glenn Close is spearheading a new campaign to remake the 1980s thriller “Fatal Attraction”, only this time from the perspective of the character she played in the movie, Alex Forrest. Close says the timing is perfect to revisit the 1987 film, in which her character famously became obsessed with ruining the life of Michael Douglas’ cheating ‘Dan Gallagher’ after his attempts to break off their affair.
(Hot-cross bunnies, anyone?)
-Canoe
★ Almost two months after the opening of its billion-dollar hit “Aquaman”, Warner Bros. is starting to put the pieces together for a sequel. The studio has tapped David Leslie Johnson-McGoldrick, who co-wrote the first movie, to begin penning a new installment, and James Wan and Peter Safran are said to be making deals to return as producer and director. Aquaman opened in December and has gone on to earn $1.12 billion globally. It is Warner Bros.’ first DC movie to pass the $1 billion mark since 2012’s “The Dark Knight Rises.”
-MSN
★ A recent New York screening of the upcoming documentary “Lorena” — which tells the story of Lorena Bobbitt, who infamously chopped off her husband’s penis in 1993 — turned into a wild ruckus. The screening of the documentary, which deals with serious issues such as domestic abuse and violence, wasn’t taken seriously as people drank to excess and became increasingly inebriated as the event went on. “Lorena” hits Amazon Prime Video on Feb. 15.
(I wouldn’t have wanted to be on-set when the director yelled, “Cut!”)
-PageSix
TODAY’S SHOW BIZ SKED:
• “Jimmy Kimmel Live” (ABC/Global): Ben Affleck, Dane Cook, Bring Me The Horizon
• “The Tonight Show starring Jimmy Fallon” (NBC/CTV): Kendall Jenner, Fred Armisen, Florida Georgia Line
• “The Late Show with Stephen Colbert” (CBS/Global): Bradley Cooper, Pete Buttigieg, Jacques Torres
• “Late Night with Seth Meyers” (NBC/CTV): John Mulaney, Stacey Abrams
• “The Late Late Show with James Corden” (CBS/CTV): Ray Romano, D’Arcy Carden, Lukas Graham
• “Watch What Happens Live” (Bravo): Andy’s Favorite Divas
• “Conan” (TBS): Aubrey Plaza
• “The View” (ABC/CTV): Dr. Ruth Westheimer
• “The Talk” (CBS): Tichina Arnold, Cedric the Entertainer
• “Live with Kelly and Ryan” (ABC/CTV): Jimmy Fallon, Lori Loughlin
• “The Ellen DeGeneres Show” (NBC/CTV): Ken Jeong
• “The Titan Games” (NBC): Dwayne Johnson inspires everyday people to compete in head-to-head battles against reigning Titans
• “The Story of Us” (HALLMARK): Jamie learns that her first love, Sawyer, is the architect of a development that wants to change her beloved neighborhood and threatens her bookstore.
BS MUSIC NOTES:
• Cardi B — was mocked by fans after accidentally thanking late singer Tom Petty for flowers she received after her Grammy win. One of the congratulatory bouquets she received was accompanied by a note containing Petty lyrics. Not realizing that he died in 2017, Cardi posted on her Instagram Story: “Thank you Tom Petty for the flowers.”
• Justin Bieber — there are reports that he is receiving treatment for depression and anxiety, but is not in rehab. A source told ‘People’ that he “seems down and tired. He has been struggling a bit.” The source was quick to say that his anxieties have “nothing” to do with his marriage to Hailey Bieber (formerly Hailey Baldwin).
• Travis Scott — Police deployed pepper balls into a Tulsa, OK concert crowd after a group of people started banging on the glass doors of the Bank of Oklahoma Center when the Scott show was postponed. The pepper balls were used to disperse the crowd, and police say no one was hurt. One door was broken.
• Pearl Jam – will serve as ambassadors for Record Store Day 2019 on April 13. Record Store Day is an annual event in which record shops worldwide celebrate their unique culture. A number of records are pressed specifically for the occasion, and are only distributed to shops participating in the event.
• Sting — is bringing his musical “The Last Ship” to Oshawa, ON in a show of support for those affected by the planned shutdown of the city’s General Motors plant. He and the Toronto cast of the musical about a shipbuilding town affected by the collapse of its main industry, will perform a free show tonight.
• The Kinks – “Baby Driver” director Edgar Wright says he is very interested in making a biopic about the group.
• Jason Aldean – His Nashville restaurant is being sued by a former cook who claims she was fired after questioning management about not being paid overtime. She is suing for the money she believes she is owed, plus damages.
• Garth Brooks – The 57-year-old has reported to the Pittsburgh Pirates spring training camp. He will spend a week with the team to mark the 20th anniversary of his “Teammates for Kids” foundation. He jokes that his best skill is crowding the plate because nobody wants to hit him with a pitch.
• Brooks and Dunn – “Reboot”, their new duets album of their hits, comes out April 5th. Among those featured are Kacey Musgraves, Kane Brown, Thomas Rhett and Jon Pardi.
HURTY LITTLE SECRETS:
Keeping secrets can be hazardous to your health. That’s according to a new study by the American Psychological Association. They asked people to answer survey questions about their innermost secrets, and found that people are more likely to dwell on secrets which provoke shame, rather than those which provoke guilt. And the more time you spend thinking about your secrets, the more likely you are to suffer negative effects such as depression, anxiety or poor health. And the more time you spend thinking about your secrets, you guessed it, the worse it is for your well-being.
(On the other hand, I can tell you from personal experience that NOT keeping secrets can also be hazardous to your health…)
(I guess we should be happy that with Alexa and our smartphones listening all the time, we don’t have secrets any more!)
(I’m in trouble. My secrets provoke shame AND guilt!)
-ABC
BIG GAMBLE:
Las Vegas has always been the wedding capital of the USA, but for Valentine’s Day, they are making it even easier to get hitched, with a ‘pop-up” wedding service being offered at the city’s McCarran International Airport. Clark County, which issues wedding licences in the city, has opened a pop-up marriage licence bureau near a baggage carousel for visitors to Las Vegas who are planning to get married. It will be open until Sunday, and has already been used by a number of customers keen to get hitched in Sin City. Marriage licences cost $77, and can be used at venues around the city including the Elvis Chapel and the Viva Las Vegas Chapel.
(“That’s NOT what I meant when I asked for a “quickie!”)
(There are other places to get married in Vegas?)
(As long as it stays in Vegas…)
-Independent
THE LANGUAGE OF ROSES:
Red . . . symbolizes love & passion.
White . . . innocence, purity, & sometimes death.
Yellow . . . friendship or jealousy.
Yellow & Red . . . represents happiness.
Deep Pink . . . gratitude & appreciation.
Pale Pink . . . conveys admiration.
– Association of the Canadian Floral Industry
THINGS ABOUT KISSING:
➢ The longest kiss ever: Over the course of three days in 2013, a Thai couple locked lips for 58 hours, 35 minutes, and 58 seconds, ending on Valentine’s Day.
➢ The longest on-screen kiss: A 3-minute-and-24-second liplock between two ladies in the 2010 movie “Elena Undone”. (I saw that…23 times!)
➢ Kissing Style: Two-thirds of people tilt to the right when they kiss. It is thought we do this because that’s the direction our heads tilt in the womb.
➢ Women have cleaner kisses: Women are more likely than their male counterparts to initiate an early morning kiss in bed, possibly because they floss more often, so they’re less worried about bad breath.
➢ Where the ‘X’ in ‘XO’ comes from: During Medieval times, many people didn’t know how to read or write, so when signing important documents, they would simply draw an ‘X,’ an abbreviation for the word “Christ”, which they would then kiss. Over time, the ‘X’ came to be associated with the act of kissing itself.
-Reader’sDigest
BS POLL VAULT:
• This year, the average person is expected to spend $221.34 for Valentine’s Day.
• 53% of women say they would end their relationship if they didn’t get something for Valentine’s Day.
• 85% of all Valentine’s Day cards are purchased by men.
• 15% of men will buy gift cards for Valentine’s Day.
• 17% of us will receive an unwanted Valentine’s Day gift.
• Last year, men spent nearly twice as much money as women for Valentine’s Day.
• Per capita spending in the U.S. on Valentine’s Day gifts for pets is $5.50.
• 40% of us say irresponsible spending is a bigger turnoff than bad breath.
-CNN, Finder, GroovyCandles
DID YOU KNOW?
A survey of dog owners showed that the love a person has for their pooch is often deeper than the love they have for their partner. Nearly half planned a Valentine’s Day celebration for their dog (usually a new outfit or a special dessert), and 47 per cent of dog owners said they spend more time cuddling with their dog than with their romantic interest.
-People
BS CHRONOMETER 02.14.19
TODAY’S CELEBIRTHDAYS . . .
1942 [77] Michael Bloomberg, Boston MA, media mogul (Bloomberg News)/estimated net worth of $48.7 billion (2018)/NYC mayor 2002-13
1948 [71] (Raymond) Teller, Philadelphia PA, Las Vegas magician (the shorter, less obnoxious half of Penn & Teller)/TV personality (“Penn & Teller Fool Us” since 2011)
1970 [49] Simon Pegg (Beckingham), Brockworth UK, movie actor (“Shaun of the Dead”, “Hot Fuzz”)
1972 [47] Rob Thomas, Landstuhl Military Base, Germany, pop/rock singer (‘Lonely No More’, Matchbox 20-‘Bent’, ‘3 AM’, w/Santana-‘Smooth’)
1978 [41] Danai Gurira, Grinnel IA, TV actress (‘Michonne’ on “The Walking Dead” since 2012)/movie actress (“Black Panther”)
1990 [29] Brett Dier, London ON, TV actor (‘Michael Cordero Jr’ on “Jane the Virgin” since 2014)
1992 [27] Freddie Highmore, London UK, TV actor (“Bates Motel” 2013-2017. “The Good Doctor” since 2017)
TODAY’S BS REASONS TO PARTY . . .
• “Valentine’s Day”, the most widely celebrated unofficial holiday. A few interesting facts …
➠ The Catholic Church recognizes at least 3 different saints named Valentine, all of whom were martyred, one for performing secret weddings for young lovers.
➠ Pope Gelasius declared February 14th “St Valentine’s Day” around 498 AD, in part to replace the ancient Roman fertility festival “Lupercalia”.
➠ About 1 billion Valentine cards are exchanged, making it the 2nd largest card-sending occasion after Christmas .
➠ It may come as no surprise that Valentine’s Day ranks number one in terms of the most fresh flowers sold and delivered.
• “Call In Single Day”, when those not celebrating Valentine’s are encouraged to take a day off work and set aside some time for themselves. Similarly, it’s “International Quirky Alone Day”, a reminder to value yourself, develop individuality, and celebrate the possibilities available to single people.
• “Donor Day”, encouraging us to fill out an organ & tissue donation card and to donate blood. You could save a life! How appropriate that it’s on the day when we give hearts.
• “Ferris Wheel Day”, celebrating the 1860 birth of George Washington Gale Ferris, the Galesburg IL engineer who invented the ‘Ferris wheel’ for the 1893 “Chicago World’s Exposition”. The original wheel measured 250 feet in diameter and could hold 1,440 people.
• “Have-A-Heart Day”, when vegetarians encourage you to quit eating animals. (So go kill a carrot today!)
• “Library Lovers Day”, an annual salute to the people who like to book it.
• “Pet Theft Awareness Day”, promoting awareness of the need for pet protection in public places. (Go ahead … just try and steal my Great Dane!)
COMING UP . . .
[Fri] Caregivers Day
[Fri] Singles Awareness Day
[Sat] Almond Day
[Sat] World Whale Day
THIS DAY IN SHOW BIZ . . .
2011 [08] TV game show “Jeopardy!” begins a series pitting human players Brad Rutter and Ken Jennings against an IBM computer named ‘Watson’, which eventually wins the first-place prize of $1 million
TODAY’S MUSIC EVENTS . . .
2015 [04] Lady Gaga becomes engaged to TV actor Taylor Kinney (“Chicago Fire”), but it fails to pass the test of time
2016 [03] Adele’s 3rd album, “25”, debuts at #1 and breaks first-week sales records in multiple countries
TODAY’S FIRST . . .
2005 [14] YouTube is launched by a group of college students, eventually becoming the largest video sharing website in the world and a main source for viral videos
TODAY’S RECORDS . . .
2013 [06] Bankrupt airline American Airlines and US Airways merge, forming the world’s largest air carrier under the name American Airlines
2014 [05] California’s Ivanpah Solar Electric Generating System, the world’s largest solar energy plant, opens in the Mojave Desert
BULL’S BITS
BS WACK VALENTINE’S FACTS:
✓ February 14th is the second biggest card-giving occasion, after Christmas.
✓ In order of popularity, Valentine’s Day cards are given to teachers, children, mothers, wives, sweethearts and pets.
✓ 27 percent of those who buy flowers on Valentine’s Day are women.
✓ The average person spends 2 weeks of his/her life kissing.
✓ The average person spends 2 years of their life making love.
✓Every year, more than 11,000 Americans are injured while experimenting with bizarre sexual positions.
WhattheFFacts, TheHolidaySpot
BS THINGS YOU DON’T WANT TO HEAR ON VALENTINE’S DAY:
• “Wait, Valentines Day is in February this year?”
• “Todd, meet Aaron … he’s going to be joining us this evening.”
• “I gave you the wrong necklace, honey … that one’s for my girlfriend.”
• “OK, I’m in for the hanky, but there’ll be no panky!”
• “I picked out these flowers especially for you … at the cemetery.”
• “You’re not a cop, are you?”
• “Table for one?”
Best of BS . . .
BS LEAST POPULAR VALENTINE CARDS:
• “Who needs flowers when we have love?”
• “To show you my love, tonight we’re eating at a place with silverware!”
• “Thinking of you sweetheart, which, technically, the court order can’t prevent.”
• “Just wanted to say ‘I love you’ when I wasn’t falling down drunk.”
• “If only we weren’t so closely related!”
• “Hey Lover, How ’Bout a Pizza and Pay-Per-View Wrestling by Candlelight?”
• “I Don’t Even Know Anyone Named Angie … I Swear!”
• “Hey Valentine, I’ll give you money to have sex with me.”
• “My dearest love: If you need me, I’ll be at Hooters”
• “If you won’t be my Valentine, will you at least be my alibi?”
– First published in ‘BS’ in 2001
BS RANDOM JOKE:
Love is a lot like a backache. It doesn’t show up on X-rays, but you know it’s there.
BS PHONE STARTER:
What is the best thing about having a partner…or being single?
BS WATER COOLER QUESTION:
Question: With Valentine’s Day in mind, 97% of women do THIS, while less than a third of men do. What is it?
Answer: Close their eyes when they kiss
BS DEEP THOUGHT:
You know you’re in love when you can’t fall asleep because reality is finally better than your dreams.
