Monday, February 22, 2016        Edition: #5631

Get a Load of This Sheet!

All “Bull Sheet” subscriber accounts have been credited for missed service days during our beach week hiatus last week. By the way, the Dom Rep was mucho calor. Ay caramba!

★ A new miniseries based on Alex Haley’s 1976 novel “Roots: The Saga Of an American Family” is coming. The 1977 “Roots” ABC-TV miniseries received 37 Emmy nominations and won a Golden Globe and a Peabody Award. It received unprecedented Nielsen ratings for the finalé and became the blueprint for the miniseries genre. Newcomer Malachi Kirby is playing the lead role of ‘Kunta Kinte’ in the remake, originally portrayed by LeVar Burton. Veteran actors Forest Whitaker, Anika Noni Rose, Laurence Fishburne, Jonathan Rhys Meyers, and Anna Paquin are also part of the reboot’s ensemble cast. The miniseries is a 4-night event, premiering May 30th.
★ When it comes to appearing on the popular game show “Jeopardy!”, Canadians need not apply. The show’s website includes a question in its FAQ section on whether Canadians are eligible to take the contestant test. The website says the show is currently ‘precluded from accepting registration information from Canadian residents’. It goes on to say the show is evaluating the matter but does not indicate why. Media reports quote the show’s producers as saying the problem is due to international laws governing how information is shared over the Internet. The long-time host of “Jeopardy!”, Alex Trebek, is a Canadian, born and raised in Sudbury ON.
– CP
★ And fans of “American Horror Story” can now spend a night in ‘Murder House’ … for a price. The home at the center of the 1st season of the FX horror anthology series can now be booked via Airbnb. The mansion, which can accommodate 16 people and features 9 bedrooms and 4.5 baths, runs for $1,450 per night. The austere-looking building has appeared in other TV shows including “The X-Files”, “Buffy the Vampire Slayer”, and “The Twilight Zone”. With over 100 years of haunted history, the house dubbed the ‘Alfred Rosenheim Mansion’ was built in 1908 and has since been declared both a cultural and historical landmark in Los Angeles.

• “Jimmy Kimmel Live” (ABC/CityTV) – Another ‘Mash-up Monday’ with KCee Lo & The Sunshine Band (Cee Lo Green and KC & The Sunshine Band).
• “Last Call With Carson Daly” (NBC) – Wolf Alice (“My Love is Cool”). Rerun.
• “Late Late Show With James Corden” (CBS/M3) – Awolnation (“Run”).
• “Late Show With Stephen Colbert” (CBS/Global) – Mavis Staples (“Your Good Fortune”).
• “Meredith Vieira” (syndicated) – Rick Springfield (“Rocket Science”).
• “The Talk” (CBS) – Kip Moore sings his current single “Running For You” (“Wild Ones”).
• “Tavis Smiley” (PBS) – Roger Waters (“Amused to Death”).
• “Tonight Show Starring Jimmy Fallon” (NBC/CTV2) – Hall & Oates (“Rock N’ Soul”).

• Carrie Underwood – At a photoshoot for “Allure” magazine, she admits that as country as she is, she doesn’t always choose her shoes accordingly. Quote: “I would take high heels over cowboy boots. I know that’s blasphemous in country music … but I just feel much more like a lady (in heels).”
• David Bowie – This year’s massive Glastonbury Festival in the UK will celebrate the late rocker as Bowie’s entire performance from the 2000 edition of the festival will be shown on bigscreen. Glastonbury runs June 22nd-26th.
• Dr Dre – Sources tell “Hollywood Reporter” he’ll star in and executive produce his own 6-episode TV series, which is backed by his bosses at Apple. Titled “Vital Signs”, it’s reportedly a semi-autobiographical show. As yet it’s unknown when and where the show will surface.
• 50 Cent – A judge who says the bankruptcy process is for ‘honest but unfortunate’ debtors is asking the rapper to explain why he’s been posting Instagram photos showing him wallowing in cash. One has him spelling out the word ‘BROKE’ with stacks of bills; another reveals a huge stash of cash in his fridge. His lawyers claim the pics are to ‘maintain his brand and image’.
• KoRn / Rob Zombie – They’ll hit the road on a co-headlining Summer tour, with In This Moment as the opening act. Dates have yet to be announced but the “Return Of the Dreads” tour will visit 25 North American cities.
• Rihanna – Due to her recent diagnosis of bronchitis, she’s postponed the first 8 dates of her upcoming “Anti” tour. Originally slated to begin this Friday in San Diego CA, the trek will now kick off in Jacksonville FL March 12th. Postponed shows are rescheduled for March and May.
• Slipknot / Marilyn Manson – They’ve announced a co-headlining tour for this Summer. Specific dates and venues have yet to be revealed but 34 cities have been announced so far. Of Mice & Men will open all dates.
• Snoop Dogg – In February 2000 he promised a ‘Doggyworld’ theme park for under-privileged kids in Mississippi. As of February 2016 they are still waiting, according to

‘Titanic II’ will set sail in 2018, 2 years later than planned. Australian billionaire Clive Palmer and his company Blue Star Line are launching the big boat, a luxury replica of the original ill-fated cruise ship. The ambitious project was announced in 2012, the 100th anniversary of the sinking of its namesake. The new version will be identical in design, except for safety improvements plus the satellite controls, digital navigation, and radar systems you’d expect on a 21st-century ship. Like its namesake,’Titanic II’ will be 270 m long, 53 m high, and weigh 40,000 tonnes. It will also have a swimming pool, Turkish baths, and gymnasiums – modern luxuries in 1912. And like the original, the cruise ship will have 3 passenger classes. (But life boats for everyone.)

As many as 65% of expectant fathers report experiencing at least one symptom of pregnancy, studies show. It’s estimated that more than 20% of expectant dads have actually sought medical care because of it. Scientists have now shown that normal, healthy men often undergo real bodily changes when they’re expecting children. What for years we’ve considered to be a disorder of the mind is actually a natural physiological reaction to impending fatherhood. Researchers say that’s because men’s hormones begin to swing when they are expecting a baby … often in sync with their wives’ hormonal changes. (Man, that morning sickness is a killer.)

What car should you buy if you’re hoping to avoid traffic tickets? Apparently not the Nissan 350Z. OK, to be fair, it’s probably not the car’s fault, but people who buy that car are more prone to traffic violations a new survey finds. The 5 cars with the highest percentage of ticketed drivers from February 2014 through February 2016 …
• Nissan 350Z … 33% of drivers have been cited.
• Lexus ES 300 … 33%
• Dodge Charger SE/SXT … 32%
• Volkswagen Jetta GL … 31%
• Chevrolet Monte Carlo LS/LT … 31%
And the 5 cars with the lowest percentage of ticketed drivers during that period …
• Buick Encore … Only 3% of drivers have been pulled over.
• Lexus IS350 … 3%
• Acura ILX … 6%
• Cadillac ATS … 6%
• Chevrolet Express … 8%

Forgive and forget, the old saying goes. But a University of Tennessee study suggests that’s not always a great idea. Why? Spouses who are forgiven for negative behaviors are more likely to keep repeating them. In fact, the research finds that spouses who forgive their partners are almost twice as likely to report a repeated incident the following day as those who hold a grudge. So what to do? An expert in family therapy suggests spouses should confront negative behaviors and deal with the causes behind them before forgiving their partners. (Does that mean no more baked beans?)
– “Knoxville News Sentinel”

And the strangest tech innovation of the month award goes to the engineers at Nissan for inventing … an office chair that puts itself neatly back under a desk at the sound of a clap. It’s true: ‘The Intelligent Parking Chair’ has motors and wheels in its circular base that sync with cameras placed in a room. When somebody claps, the chair navigates its way back to the proper location. It’s more of a publicity stunt than a new product: Nissan is looking to generate buzz for its soon-to-be-unveiled technology for self-parking cars. At least 10 of its models will have some form of the tech by 2020. (It’s unclear what clap-powered chairs would do if the whole office ever burst into applause.)

• At least 49 people have died in accidents involving selfies since 2014.
• Lesbians have a 9% wage premium over heterosexual women, whereas gay men face an earnings penalty of 11% compared versus straight men.
– “The Economist”

“Nobody ever wrote a song about a small ass.”
– Khloe Kardashian


1959 [57] Kyle MacLachlan, Yakima WA, TV actor (‘Dale Cooper’ on “Twin Peaks” 1990-91 and the 2017 reboot, “Agents of “SHIELD” 2014-15)

1969 [47] Clinton Kelly, Panama City, Panama, TV co-host (“The Chew” since 2011, “What Not to Wear” 2003-13)

1973 [43] Scott ‘Flip’ Phillips, Madison FL, grunge-rock drummer and co-founder of Creed, Alter Bridge

1974 [42] James Blunt, Tidworth UK, pop singer (“Bonfire Heart”, “You’re Beautiful”)

1975 [41] Drew Barrymore, Culver City CA, movie actress (“50 First Dates”)/film director-producer (“Whip It”)

1979 [37] Tom Higgenson, Villa Park IL, pop singer (Plain White T’s-“Rhythm of Love”, “Hey There Delilah”)

1985 [31] Zach Roerig, Montpelier OH, TV actor (‘Matt Donovan’ on “The Vampire Diaries” since 2009)

• “Be Humble Day”. Just for one day try not to brag or to boast; and try not to talk about your success or accomplishments. Why? Because humility is a good thing.

• “Margarita Day”. Tequila, triple sec, lime juice, and ice are everything you’ll need to celebrate … well, that and some good friends. And a tropical beach wouldn’t hurt.

• “Snow Moon”, the Full Moon of February, alternately knows as the “Hunger Moon” or “Storm Moon”.

• “World Thinking Day”, an annual celebration of Girl Scouts/Girl Guides founders Lord & Lady Baden-Powell’s joint birthday. Scouts & Guides are encouraged to ‘think’ of good deeds. Many will wear their uniforms to school today (if you remind them).

2015 [01] At the 87th Academy Awards, “Birdman” is awarded ‘Best Picture’; Eddie Redmayne ‘Best Actor’ (“A Theory of Everything”); and Julianne Moore ‘Best Actress’ (“Still Alice”)

2004 [12] Norah Jones begins a 6-week run at #1 on the album chart with “Feels Like Home”, her 2nd chart-topping album

2006 [09] Apple’s iTunes store sells it’s 1 billionth song

2014 [02] After her gold medal at Sochi, Norwegian cross-country skier Marit Bjoergen sets a new record for most Winter Olympics medals awarded to a female, with a total of 10

[Tues] Curling is Cool Day
[Tues] Dog Biscuit Day
[Tues] Single Tasking Day
[Wed] 2016 Brit Awards (London UK)
[Wed] National Cupcake Day (Canada)
[Wed] World Bartender Day

Bird Health Awareness Week / Brotherhood-Sisterhood Week / Build a Better Trade Show Image Week / Date Week / Eating Disorders Awareness Week / Engineers Week / Entrepreneurship Week / Invasive Species Awareness Week / Justice for Animals Week / Through With the Chew Week


Highlight bits culled from 22 years of “Bull Sheet” back issues …
• The box is perched at the edge of a cliff.
• It is hailing outside the box.
• The box has a working fireplace and a Jacuzzi.
• The box is a mess, you’re expecting company any minute, and you haven’t even showered.
• You might bump into the shifty guy from the adjacent box who’s always up all night.
• The box came from IKEA and you have to put the damn thing together first.
• It’s the day they’re installing cable in the box, and you don’t know when they’ll show up.
• You’re not paid to think.
– First published in “BS” 2011.

• You know what ‘psych!’ means.
• You know that another name for a musical keyboard is a ‘synthesizer’,
• You’ve actually heard of ‘Mr T’.
• You ever wore fluorescent neon clothing.
• You could breakdance, or wish you could.
• You thought that “Transformers” were ‘more than meets the eye’.
• You owned an ATARI but wanted a Commodore 64.
• You know what leg warmers are and probably had a pair, or once wore bicycle shorts underneath a short skirt and felt stylish.
• You remember when ‘Happy Meals’ came in a box, not a paper bag.
• You hated ‘Scrappy Doo’.
• You remember the first time you went to a video store to rent a movie.
– First published in “BS” 2011.

I couldn’t work for my last boss after what she said to me. She said, “You’re fired!”

Have you ever taken something that doesn’t belong to you? Why? What happened? Still got it?

Question: Asked what naughty thing we did in the last year, about 1-in-5 of us confess to the same thing … THIS.
Answer: Cheating on taxes.

Some people grow up and spread cheer, others just grow up and spread.

Carlos Molina @ X96.3 [WXNY] NYC NY; Tonya Cherry @ GX94 [CJGX] Yorkton SK; Chuck Marsh @ 99.3 The Bull [WQDK] Ahsokie NC; Jon Mason @ Dover Community Radio, Kent UK; Trae Vance @ FOX 96-7 [WXOF] Yankeetown FL; Landon Peterson @ Q93.3 [CKSQ] Stettler AB; Kimberly Willhite @ Power Zone Radio, Cocoa FL; William Zeze @ Crusader Radio, St John’s, Antigua; Jason Bailey @ 106.9 Kicks Country [WKXD] Cookeville TN; Andy Cohen @ 107.5 Bolt FM [CHBO] Humboldt SK; Kim Buchanan @ “The Morning Blend”, WTMJ-TV Milwaukee WI; Mark Leigh @ Dales FM, Cumbria UK; Zack Skyler @ Fun 101.7 [WLDE] Fort Wayne IN; Vanessa Carroccio @ 96.9 Radio Humber, Toronto ON; Steve Drumm @ Country 101 [WBLE] Batesville MS; and Chris Collins @ The Chris-Mike Zoo Station, Fair Oaks CA.

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