Monday, February 23, 2015       Edition: #5403


Here, Have Another Sheetload!

BS SHOW BIZ BUZZ:
★ 27-year-old singer/actress Hilary Duff has filed for divorce from former NHL hockey player Mike Comrie. They separated in January last year but remained on good terms for the sake of their 2-year-old son Luca. An insider says Duff finally gave up on the marriage after hearing of a wild night when her hubby allegedly propositioned several women at a popular Beverly Hills hangout. She filed divorce papers the next day. Comrie’s father and uncles founded The Brick furniture chain, which was sold in 2012 for $700 million. That’s why his nickname is ‘The Brick’.
– TMZ.com / Wikipedia.org
★ 75-year-old fashion designer Ralph Lauren made a surprise visit to his London offices last week, dispelling the widely-circulated company rumor that he had died. The buzz had gathered a fair bit of steam after very few people could recall when they’d last seen or heard from Ralph himself. Some of the staff had become so suspicious that a second, even stranger, rumor had begun making the rounds … that Ralph’s recent runway appearances have been faked with CGI effects.
– PopBitch.com
★ And actor Jason Biggs will NOT appear in the 3rd season of “Orange Is the New Black” on Netflix as producers have decided to shift the focus away from his character’s relationship with imprisoned fiancée ‘Piper Chapman’, played by Taylor Schilling. The “American Pie” actor has played ‘Larry Bloom’ on the prison drama since its launch in 2013, but will not be back for the next set of episodes, due to premiere in June. Biggs says (hopefully) there’s always a possibility he can come back.
– “New York Daily News”

TODAY’S SHOW BIZ SKED:
• “BET Honors 2015″ (BET) – Kanye West receives the ‘Visionary Award’ at the pre-taped gala in recognition of being a ‘multifaceted trailblazer and pioneer’. Others being honored include Usher (‘Musical Arts Award’), and actress Phylicia Rashad (‘Theatrical Arts Award’).
• “Conan” (TBS/CTV) – In the Valley Below (“The Belt”).
• “Jimmy Kimmel Live” (ABC/CityTV) – ‘Mash-up Mondays’ continue with rapper Warren G jamming with soprano saxophonist Kenny G.
• “Last Call With Carson Daly” (NBC) – Above & Beyond (“We Are All We Need”).
• “Late Late Show” (CBS/Omni 1) – Classic rock tribute band LA Rocks.
• “Late Night With Seth Meyers” (NBC/CTV) – Mary J Blige (“The London Sessions”); Misterwives (“Reflections”).
• “Late Show With David Letterman” (CBS/Omni1) – Steve Earle (“Terraplane”).
• “Live With Kelly & Michael” (syndicated/CTV) – Flo Rida (“The Perfect 10″).
• “Sleepy Hollow” (FOX/Global) – 2nd season finalé; familiar faces perish and a key relationship implodes.
• “Tonight Show Starring Jimmy Fallon” (NBC/CTV2) – Christina Aguilera (“The Voice”); Kid Rock (“First Kiss”, out tomorrow).
• “The Voice” (NBC/CTV2) – The Season 8 premiere sees Christina Aguilera return as a coach after maternity leave, unseating Gwen Stefani and re-joining Adam Levine, Blake Shelton, and Pharrell Williams. This season’s mentors are Ellie Goulding, Lionel Richie, Nick Jonas, and Meghan Trainor. Carson Daly is back as host. Part 2 of the debut airs tomorrow night.
• “The World Dog Awards” (CW) – Celebrating dogs for their work in the military, health services, and entertainment. Rerun.

BS MUSIC NOTES:
• Blur – Damon Albarn’s band is set to release its 1st studio album in 12 years, entitled “The Magic Whip”, on April 27th. They’ll also headline the British Summertime festival in London’s Hyde Park on June 20th. Their last studio album, “Think Tank”, was released in 2003.
• Coldplay – They’re planning a massive stadium tour in 2016, according to “Billboard”. But will it be their last-ever? They’ve already suggested the new album “A Head Full Of Dreams”, due later this year, may be their final album.
• Drake – Tonight he begins his 1st-ever headlining tour of Australia and New Zealand at the Vector Arena in Auckland NZ. The trek then hits the Aussie cities of Sydney, Melbourne, Perth, and Brisbane. 2 Chainz is the special guest.
• Eric Church – The country star and wife Katherine Church have named their 2nd son, born last week, ‘Tennessee Hawkins Church’. (We would have called him ‘First Baptist’.)
• Foo Fighters – Their HBO series “Sonic Highways” will be released on Blu-ray, DVD, and digital download April 9th. All 8 episodes will include bonus footage and extended interviews.
• Kanye West – He’s admitted in an interview on Power 105.1 New York’s morning show “The Breakfast Club” that he hadn’t even heard Beck’s “Morning Phase” before his post-Grammy rant about its unworthiness.
• Lil Wayne – Thanks to the $51-million lawsuit with his label Cash Money Records, his album “Tha Carter V” has been shelved indefinitely. So he’s turned his attention to a new project, “The Free Weezy Album”, which he plans to release for free in March.

BRONZED BABY SHOES ARE BACK:
Beginning in the 1930s, a former kindergarten teacher went door-to-door offering a novelty service to parents … bronzing baby shoes as a forever keepsake. The tradition slipped out of fashion by the 1970s, but now it seems it’s making a comeback as the 58-year-old grandson of the company’s founder is using social media to market the bronze-coating of just about anything you want: track cleats, golf balls, dog collars, ballet slippers, cowboy boots, football helmets, even a NY Yankees ball cap that was presented to retiring star Derek Jeter. But baby shoes remain most popular, priced from $79.95. (Doesn’t it make it difficult for Junior to walk?)
NET: http://www.americanbronzing.com
– Adapted from Associated Press

GREAT USES FOR AN OLD PHONE OR TABLET:
So you’ve upgraded to a new one; so what to do with the old? How about …
• Alarm Clock – Using an old phone or tablet means you can turn off distractions and just use the gadget as an alarm. Apple and Android both have good built-in alarm functions.
• Dedicated Car Player – Load your music library on your old phone and stick it in your car permanently. When the car is parked at home, grab new music or podcasts using wi-fi.
• Digital Photo Frame – Using an app you can use an old tablet to supply photo slideshows from local photos, or to pull images from Facebook, Instagram, Twitter, and other sites.
• eBook Reader – You can install the free Kindle app to read books you’ve purchased, or borrow eBooks from your local library through the Overdrive app.
• For Kids – If your children are clamoring for a gadget of their own, an old one is perfect for watching videos, reading eBooks, or playing games. And if they destroy it, it’s no great loss.
• Security Camera – With a simple free app, you can transform your Android or Apple gadget into a motion-activated camera that records images and alerts you when someone snoops.
• Universal Controller – Again using an app, turn your old gadget into a universal remote control for your entire home entertainment system and anything else connected to the Internet.
(If all else fails, an outdated tablet makes a good paperweight.)
– Sourced from USAToday.com

MOVIES BY THE MINUTE:
Here’s a totally different way of breaking down last night’s Oscar-nominated movies … their cost per minute. Which cost most? Here they are in ascending order …
• “Boyhood” – $24,242 p/m
• “Whiplash” – $30,841 p/m
• “The Theory Of Everything” – $121,951 p/m
• “The Imitation Game” – $122,807 p/m
• “Selma” – $156,250 p/m
• “Birdman” – $184,874 p/m
• “The Grand Budapest Hotel” – $310,000 p/m
• “American Sniper” – $439,393 p/m
– PopBitch.com

STATUE? YES, THAT’S ME:
Now you can take your selfie game to the next level with a 3D printed statue of yourself. Dusseldorf, Germany-based DOOB 3D is offering to produce a detailed, 4-inch figurine of your body for a fee of $95. A ‘Barbie’-esque 10-inch model goes for $395, while a 14-inch figure that’s more along the lines of an old-school ‘GI Joe’ doll costs $695. The detail on each DOOB is astounding, thanks to a hi-res 3D printer that outputs in full color. So far, the company has eight 3D scanning booths (‘DOOB-licators’) worldwide and is continually adding more. About 10% of subjects are typically pets, as customers seek to immortalize their critters so they’ll forever be a part of their lives. (700 bucks? Whew, we’ll wait for the home version.)
– Wired.com

FOR THE RECORD:
This year’s Oscar night ‘goodie bags’ handed out to Hollywood stars reached a new all-time record. The freebie products and services offered have been evaluated at $125,000 … a whopping 56% jump over last year.
– “The Independent”

BS AMAZING FACT:
Roughly 56% of average monthly earnings in the African country of Malawi are spent on mobile phone charges, compared to about 0.11% in Macau, China.
– BBC News

BS SUBSCRIBER NOTE:
“The Bull Sheet” is on Spring Break from March 2-13 inclusive. All subscribers will receive account credits for missed service days.

BS CHRONOMETER 02.23.15


TODAY’S CELEBIRTHDAYS . . .
1952 [63] Brad Whitford, Winchester MA, rock guitarist (Aerosmith-”I Don’t Want to Miss a Thing”, “Crazy”)/Rock & Roll Hall of Fame (2001)

1965 [50] Michael Dell, Houston TX, founder & CEO of Dell Computer/net worth $22.4 billion (2014)

1972 [43] Steve Holy, Dallas TX, country singer (“Brand New Girlfriend”, “Good Morning Beautiful”)

1976 [39] Kelly Macdonald, Glasgow, Scotland, TV actress (‘Margaret Thompson’ on “Boardwalk Empire” since 2010)

1981 [34] Josh Gad, Hollywood FL, movie actor (‘Olaf’ in “Frozen”, ”Jobs”)/Broadway actor (“The Book of Mormon”)

1983 [32] Emily Blunt, London UK, movie actress (“Into the Woods”, “The Devil Wears Prada”)/Mrs John Krasinski since 2010

1983 [32] Aziz Ansari, Columbia SC, TV actor (‘Tom Haverford’ on “Parks & Recreation” 2009-15)/standup comedian

1994 [21] Dakota Fanning, Conyers GA, movie actress (“Twilight Saga” films, “The Runaways”)

TODAY’S BS REASONS TO PARTY . . .

• “Curling is Cool Day”, celebrating the Winter sport of curling … basically a drinking game with some housecleaning interspersed. Curling is one sport in which participants are able to laugh at themselves …
NET: http://icing.org/humour/2liners/2liners.htm

• “Dog Biscuit Appreciation Day”. A recent poll of pet owners finds that fully 34% have eaten dog food at one time or another, most likely just to see what it tastes like.

THIS DAY IN SHOW BIZ . . .
2014 [01] The closing ceremony of the Winter Olympics in Sochi, Russia

TODAY’S MUSIC EVENTS . . .
2000 [15] Carlos Santana ties Grammy Awards record by picking up 8 trophies for his multi-platinum album “Supernatural” and its first #1 single “Smooth”

2010 [05] Britain’s Culture Ministry declares The Beatles’ Abbey Road studio in London an historic site

TODAY’S FIRST . . .
1997 [18] Scientists in Scotland announce the 1st successful cloning of an adult mammal, ‘Dolly’ the sheep

TODAY’S RECORD . . .
1992 [23] Residents of Auckland, New Zealand complete the tallest tower made entirely of LEGO blocks … 65 feet, 2 inches (19.9 m)

AND REMEMBER . . .
[Tues] “Parks & Recreation” series finalé (NBC/CityTV)
[Tues] Cupcake Day (Canada)
[Tues] Spay Day USA
[Tues] Single Tasking Day
[Tues] World Bartender Day
[Wed] “Survivor” 30th season debut (CBS)
[Wed] 2015 BRIT Awards (London)

THIS WEEK IS . . .
Bird Health Awareness Week / Eating Disorders Awareness Week / Engineers Week / Entrepreneurship Week / Invasive Species Awareness Week

BULL’S BITS


BEST OF BS:
Highlight bits culled from 21 years of “Bull Sheet” back issues …
BS FIGURE SKATER PET PEEVES:
● Global satellite TV coverage allows over 4 billion people to see your monster wedgie.
● Bulgarian judges blatantly favor women skaters with facial hair.
● Mom keeps blowing that air horn during your performances.
● No good place to hide the colostomy bag.
● At 15, you win the gold medal. At 16, you’re portraying ‘Wacky Rabbit’ in the Ice Capades.
– First published in “BS” 1998.

WEIRDEST BS WANT ADS:
The world’s 1st ‘Classified Ad’ appeared in “The Times of London” 129 years ago today in 1886. A few recent ads that might cause a double-take …
• “Used Tombstone. Perfect for someone named Homer Hendel-Bergen-Heinzel. One only.”
• “Turkey for sale. Partially eaten. Only 8-days-old. Both drumsticks still intact. $23.”
• “Full-size mattress. Royal Tonic. 20 year warranty. Like new. Slight urine smell. $40.”
• “Somebody to go back in time with me. This is not a joke. Must bring your own weapons. Safety not guaranteed. I have only done this once before.”
• “Human skull. Used once only. $200 OBO.”
• “White trash compactor. Looks like new. Asking $225.”
• “China cabinet, buffet, hutch. Solid pine. A few cat scratches … but cat has been killed. $700.”
– First published in “BS” 2011.
NET: http://www.FreeRadioPrep.com

BS PHONE STARTER:
Britain’s 30-year-old Prince Harry is rumored to be involved with 24-year-old actress Emma Watson. According to “Woman’s Day”, when Emma became single Harry invited her to a party and he’s now completely smitten. What do you think … would they make a great couple or not?

BS U-PICK TRIVIA:
You suffer from ‘clinophobia’. What are you afraid of?
a. Encountering angry ducks.
b. Crossing bridges.
c. Going to bed. [CORRECT]
– “2201 Fascinating Facts”

BS RANDOM JOKE:
Bono and The Edge walk into a bar. The bartender says: “Oh no, not you two!”

BS WATER COOLER QUESTION:
Question: According to a poll, THIS is the household item we are most afraid of.
Answer: Automatic garbage disposal unit. (“Ahhhh …. I lost a finger!!!!”)

BS DEEP THOUGHT:
A pessimist’s blood type is always B-negative.

NOW ON OUR SHEET LIST:
Mark Johnson @ Pioneer 90.1 [KSRQ] Thief River Falls MN; Garry Holden @ Phuket Vibe Online Radio, Phuket, Thailand; Ted Shreve @ DesertStormRadio.com NYC; and Emma Critchley @ KMFM Radio Network, Kent UK.


Printer Friendly Version