Wednesday, February 28, 2018 – Edition: #6166

The BS Press!

BS SHOW BIZ BUZZ:
★ Any new mom knows that baby gifts come rolling in once your little one arrives. But when you’re friends with Oprah Winfrey, things get a little more epic. Just ask Mindy Kaling, who welcomed her first child, daughter Katherine, in December. What Oprah-endorsed wonder awaited the newborn? Kaling says that two men arrived with a U-Haul truck and delivered “a hand-carved bookcase, prettier than any professional dollhouse you had ever seen, that contained a hundred of the classic essential books in children’s literature”. Naturally, it gets better. Each book has ‘Katherine’s Book Club’ on it.
-MSN
★ Stan Lee has reported to police that $1.4million was stolen from his bank account – weeks after someone swindled him out of $850,000 and used it to buy a condo.  LAPD detectives visited the 95-year-old’s home in the Hollywood Hills on Friday and spent more than two hours with the Marvel Comics legend, determining who had access to his bank accounts and when the money went missing.  Lee reportedly turned over his financial records to help police find the perpetrator.
-DailyMail
★ Heather Locklear was arrested on Sunday night. Officers responded to her home in Thousand Oaks, CA and say she was “extremely agitated, uncooperative and antagonistic” before they could even start the investigation. Locklear was eventually charged with felony domestic battery and three counts of attacking an officer. She is set to appear in court on March 13.
-TheBlast
★ Reese Witherspoon is not above getting down and dirty on Hollywood Blvd. The actress literally dropped to her knees to scrub her own Walk of Fame star after it got scuffed up with shoe prints. In a hilarious video, Reese grabs a tissue and gets to work right in the middle of a busy day. She is heard joking, “Now you’re looking good girl … and don’t you let people walk all over you. Witherspoon received her star in 2010.
-TheBlast
★ Jim Carrey, who has recently put his work in Hollywood on hold to focus on painting, shared an original piece on Twitter Sunday in response to the school shooting in Parkland, Florida, on Feb. 14. And the painting is drawing mixed reactions. The painting depicts a seemingly dead schoolgirl sprawled out on the America flag soaked in blood. Her bloodied school supplies, as well as footprints are sprawled all around her. Carrey captioned the image “Oh say, can’t you see?!” The image is one of several politically-inspired pieces Carrey has shared on social media.
-MSN

TODAY’S SHOW BIZ SKED:
• “Jimmy Kimmel Live” (ABC/Global): Saoirse Ronan, Kyle Chandler, Joey Dosik ( R )
• “The Tonight Show starring Jimmy Fallon” (NBC/CTV): Chadwick Boseman, Marlon Wayans, Mike “Rooster” McConaughey, Butch Gilliam, Devin Dawson
• “The Late Show with Stephen Colbert” (CBS/Global): Donald Glover, Sebastian Maniscalco, IBEYI
• “Late Night with Seth Meyers” (NBC/CTV): Sarah Jessica Parker, Mae Whitman, Tony Rock
• “The Late Late Show with James Corden” (CBS/CTV): Elton John, Sharon Stone
• “Conan” (TBS/Comedy): Zach Galifianakis, They Might Be Giants
• “Watch What Happens Live” (Bravo): Dennis Quaid, Patton Oswalt
• “The View” (ABC/CTV): Guest co-host Cindy McCain
• “The Talk” (CBS): Iyanla Vanzant
• “Live with Kelly and Ryan” (ABC/CTV): Dennis Quaid, Maia & Alex Shibutani
• “The Ellen DeGeneres Show” (NBC/CTV): Kerry Washington, Tony Goldwyn, Scott Foley, Bellamy Young, Jeff Perry, Darby Stanchfield, Katie Lowes, Guillermo Diaz, Josh Malina, Joe Morton, George Newbern, Cornelius Smith Jr.
• “Survivor: Ghost Island” (CBS): This “Ghost Island” season begins with a special two-hour premiere.

BS MUSIC NOTES:
• Katy Perry – made a surprise appearance at a benefit for the survivors of the deadly mudslide in Montecito, California, on Sunday. She wasn’t listed in the line-up for the ‘One 805 Kick Ash Bash’ fundraiser, named after the area code where the natural disaster first hit, but turned up to perform a set for the crowd of 2,000.
• Drake – his discarded teenage notebook filled with rap lyrics is up for auction. The beaten-up purple spiral notebook contains about 12 pages of lyrics, including what appears to be his homage to Biggie Smalls’ Ten Crack Commandments, titled ‘10 Mack Commandments’. It is expected to go for around US $54,000.
• 50 Cent – his alleged Bitcoin fortune just dwindled from an unrealistic amount of millions of dollars, to a very realistic amount of ZERO, after he admitted that he has never once in his life owned a bitcoin. Why did he go along with the story at first? He says, “As a general matter, so long as a press story is not irreparably damaging to my image or brand, I usually do not feel the need to publicly deny the reporting.”
• Elton John – personally phoned the members of Greta Van Fleet, whose members grew up hearing Elton’s music and watching The Lion King, to perform at his annual fundraising Oscars viewing party on Sunday.
• Genesis – Tony Banks says that the 50th anniversary of their debut Genesis single calls for “some great commemoration” – but he’s not certain that will include a reunion. He points out that Phil Collins is no longer capable of playing drums, and though, “you could have someone else drumming and we could do a show…and, then, would that really be Genesis? You’ve got to make certain you can put on a show that is good enough to be a Genesis show.”
• Rolling Stones – have announced 11 new dates in the U.K., Ireland, Germany, France, the Czech Republic and Poland. The upcoming leg of their ‘No Filter’ tour launches May 17th in Dublin. Keith Richards: “We’re only just getting started, really.”
• Metallica – have added an extensive number of dates in North America on their ‘The WorldWired Tour’. The run kicks off on September 2 at the University of Wisconsin-Madison, and will wrap on March 13 in Grand Rapids, Michigan.
• Hedley – frontman Jacob Hoggard insists the alleged rape accusation against him was actually a consensual sexual encounter. His accuser, an unidentified Ottawa woman, said that Hoggard raped her in a Toronto hotel room two weeks after matching on the dating app Tinder.
• Kacey Musgraves – is set to release her fourth studio album, ‘Golden Hour’, on March 30. On Friday, she gave fans a hint of what’s to come with two new songs, ‘Space Cowboy’ and ‘Butterflies.’
• Brett Young – will marry his longtime off-and-on girlfriend Taylor Mills. He proposed earlier this month in Oxford, Miss. The location was chosen because it’s near the University of Mississippi, where Young went to college.

LET’S JUST GO WITH ‘FEB’:
Now that it’s the last day of the month, it’s time we got around to talking about this. How in the heck do you pronounce February? Most of us say Feb-yoo-air-ee, but that’s certainly not how it is spelled. The ‘r’ is before the ‘u’, clearly showing that the correct way to say the word is more like ‘Feb-roo-air-ee’. But because so many people say it the other way, both Merriam-Webster and American Heritage dictionaries consider the common pronunciation correct, along with the ‘r before ‘u’ pronunciation. This gets some grammarists all worked up. But the loss of the first ‘r’ in February is not some recent habit propagated by lazy teenagers. People have been avoiding that r for at least 150 years. Why? It has to do with the fact that we do not like to have two r’s so close to each other. When one is eliminated over time, it is called ‘dissimilation’, and it is common to several languages. What other words do we pull the same stunt with? Su(r)prise, gove(r)nor, pa(r)ticular, be(r)serk, paraphe(r)nalia, cate(r)pillar, southe(r)ner, entrep(r)eneur, p(r)erogative…Not everybody drops these r’s, but at the same time, nobody seems to get too upset when they hear others do it.
(Except my mother!)
(Liberry, anyone?)
(Maybe instead of changing the accepted pronunciation, they should just change the spelling?)
-MentalFloss

WELL, THIS SUCKS:
British Environment Secretary Michael Gove wants to ban the…drinking straw. That’s his response to estimates by The Marine Conservation Society that the UK goes through 8.5 billion straws each year. They say plastic straws are among the top ten waste items found during beach clean-ups and they have an extremely harmful effect on wildlife that ingest them. The activist group ‘Refuse the Straw’ points out that plastic straws take more than two centuries to disintegrate. The country recently instituted a 5pence charge for plastic bags to dissuade their use.
(Coming soon: plastic stir sticks…with a hole in them!)
(Straws just make my beer taste funny anyway!)
(If straws are going to hang around for 200 years, you’d think they’d re-use them!)
-Unilad

CHALLENGE ACCEPTED:
You’ll want to put on your stretchy pants for this one. Alexandra’s Pizza in Sydney, N.S. is offering up the latest “eat it all and it’s free” eating challenge. But they are also offering to donate $500 to the local charity of your choice, a photo on the restaurant’s wall-of-fame, and free pizza or donairs for a year if you can finish their massive 6-pound donair sandwich. The donair is a popular late-night dish in Nova Scotia which resembles Greece’s gyro. Although plenty of people have tried over the past five months, the heaping pile of fried meat atop a pizza-sized pita has yet to meet someone hungry enough to devour it within the required one hour. How much does it cost to try? $59 plus tax. Prepaid.
(For once, I’ll finally be able to answer “yes” when I’m asked if I’d like to “box that up”!)
(Six pounds? I had a dog that weighed less than that!)
(I’m guessing they don’t sell a lot of dessert with this dish!)
-CTV, CBC

RIDICULOUS REASONS WHY REAL COUPLES HAVE BROKEN UP:
1. Rhyming: “She always said things like, ‘Awesome possum!’, ‘Neato squito!’, and ‘Coolio hoolio!’
2. Popcorn: “She chewed her popcorn too loudly.”
3. Arguing: “She dumped me because she thought I didn’t care about the relationship because I never argued.”
4. Voldemort: “She refused to say ‘Voldemort’ and would get mad at me for saying it.”
5. Mispronunciation: “I couldn’t take it anymore when she kept saying, ‘Supposibly’.”
6. And That: “He used the term ‘And that…’ all the time. Like, ‘At the lake, we would ski, fish, tube, and that…’”
7. Tea Spoon: “She wouldn’t stir her tea but would clink her spoon back and forth inside the mug.”
8. Sister’s Name: “I couldn’t get past the fact that my girlfriend had the same name as my sister.”
9. Eggs: “He broke up with me because I didn’t know how to cook scrambled eggs.”
10. Iron Maiden: “She dumped me because I didn’t like Iron Maiden.”
(Notice it is mostly the GUYS doing the ridiculous dumping here?)
-List25

BS CHRONOMETER 02.28.18

TODAY’S CELEBIRTHDAYS . . .
1940 [78] Mario Andretti, Montona, Italy, retired race-car driver (1969 Indianapolis 500, 1978 Formula One World Champion)

1944 [74] Kelly Bishop, Colorado Springs CO, TV actress (‘Emily Gilmore’ on “Gilmore Girls: A Year In the Life” 2016, “The Gilmore Girls” 2000-07)/movie actress (“Dirty Dancing”)

1955 [63] Gilbert Gottfried, Brooklyn NY, comedian/voice actor (provided the voice for Iago in Disney’s “Aladdin” and was the spokesperson for “Aflac” for many years)

1957 [61] John Turturro, Brooklyn NY, movie actor (“Transformers” films, “The Taking of Pelham 1 2 3”)

1969 [49] Pat Monahan, Erie PA, pop singer (Train-‘Hey, Soul Sister’, ‘Drops Of Jupiter’)

1973 [45] Eric Lindros, London ON, retired pro hockey player (Philadelphia Flyers, Toronto Maple Leafs, New York Rangers, Dallas Stars), Hockey Hall of Fame, 2016

1976 [42] Ali Larter, Cherry Hill NJ, movie actress (“Resident Evil” films, “Final Destination” films)/TV actress (“Heroes” 2006-10)

1977 [41] Jason Aldean, Macon GA, country singer (‘Burnin’ It Down’, ‘Dirt Road Anthem’)

TODAY’S BS REASONS TO PARTY . . .
• “Tooth Fairy Day”, honoring the devious dental donor who leaves money under kids’ pillows for lost teeth. No one knows the origin for sure but there was a fairytale In 18th-century France about a ‘tooth mouse’ who hid under pillows. While average kids now get paid over $2 for prime enamel, 10% of children who tuck a tooth beneath their bolster get … nothing.

• “International Floral Design Day”, focusing on the art of flower arranging, both as a profession and as a hobby.

• “Rare Disease Day”, established in 2008 as an annual observance on the last day of February to raise awareness for rare diseases and improve access to treatment. A disease is defined as ‘rare’ in Europe when it affects less than 1-in-2000; and in the USA if it affects fewer than 200,000 in total.

• “Inconvenience Yourself Day”, observed annually on the 4th Wednesday of February, it’s a day to focus on ways to show respect for others, the environment, and the world around you (if that’s not a problem…)

• “International Repetitive Strain Injuries Awareness Day”, the 18th annual, sponsored by the Industrial Accident Prevention Association. The organization notes that while it takes a worker an average 47 days to recover from a broken bone, a worker suffering from an ‘RSI’, such as tendinitis or carpal tunnel syndrome, takes an average 52 days or 71 days, respectively.

COMING UP . . .
[Thurs] Peanut Butter Lover’s Day
[Thurs] National Pig Day
[Fri] Dress in Blue Day
[Fri] Employee Appreciation Day

THIS DAY IN SHOW BIZ . . .
1983 [35] Final TV episode of “M*A*S*H” airs; a record 125 million watch in the US (still the most-watched program in history)

TODAY’S MUSIC EVENTS . . .
1998 [20] Celine Dion’s ‘My Heart Will Go On’, from the movie ‘Titanic’, goes to #1 in the US, joining the soundtrack and the movie at #1 on their respective charts

2014 [04] Gwen Stefani & Gavin Rossdale have their 3rd child together, Apollo Bowie Flynn

2016 [02] At the Oscars, Lady Gaga performs ‘Til It Happens To You’ joined by a group of sexual assault survivors, but the “Best Song” Oscar goes to Sam Smith’s ‘Writing’s On the Wall’

TODAY’S FIRST . . .
2013 [05] In North Carolina, a neuro-scientist at Duke University announces he has successfully connected the brains of 2 rats in such a way that they can share information

BULL’S BITS

BS WACK FACTS:
✓ Prisoners on Alcatraz always had hot showers so they didn’t get acclimatized to cold water and try to escape by swimming.
✓ The International Space Station is the most expensive object ever built, at US$150 billion.
✓ McDonald’s makes about US$75 million per day.
✓ Apple earns US$300,000 per minute ($432 million per day).
✓ When the U.S. half-cent was discontinued in 1857 for not having enough buying power, it was worth about the same as a modern U.S. dime.
✓ One-third of Americans between 18-34 spend more annually on coffee than they do on retirement investments.
-Factslides

BS THINGS YOU DON’T WANT TO HEAR FROM YOUR UBER DRIVER:
✗ “You don’t mind if I swing by my apartment to reload my gun, do you?”
✗ “Does the back seat smell like a dead guy?”
✗ “You’re not a cop, are you?”
✗ “If my doctor knew I was driving, he’d be real pissed.”
✗ “All the empty bottles up here keep rolling under the brake.”
✗ “You can help yourself to the loose potato chips under the seat.”
✗ “I’m letting you know up front, any touching is 50 bucks extra.”
✗ “Mommy let me drive by myself today.”
✗ “You know it’s 4 am and 3 couples already had sex back there.”
✗ “My passengers have a nearly 80% survival rate.”
-first published in BS in 2017

BS RANDOM JOKE:
I wonder if the guy who coined the term “One Hit Wonder” came up with any other phrases.

BS PHONE STARTER:
• What is your best car-buying negotiating tip?

BS WATER COOLER QUESTION:
Question: Just under 20% of adults say THIS is the last thing they do before getting into bed. What is it?
Answer: Make sure the door is locked.

BS DEEP THOUGHT:
An investment in knowledge pays the best interest.


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