Monday, February 6, 2017 – Edition: #5905

Tomorrow’s Show Prep Today!

★ Beyoncé’s Coachella performance is going ahead in April, even though she’s pregnant with twins. The 35-year-old is set to headline the Coachella Valley Music & Arts Festival on Saturday, April 15th and Saturday, April 22nd, and insiders say she won’t cancel the gigs. One reveals that Bey’s already lined up 2 other artists to join her onstage and made travel arrangements for herself and the guest stars. Beyoncé will most likely be in her 3rd trimester by the time of the performance.
– Bang Showbiz
★ Canadian crooner Michael Bublé says his 3-year-old son Noah is “progressing well” as he undergoes treatment for cancer. Bublé and his Argentine actress-wife Luisana Lopilato issued a statement on Friday saying: “He has been brave throughout and we continue to be inspired by his courage.” The statement comes a couple of weeks after it was announced that Bublé has cancelled his gig as host of the “Brit Awards”, coming up February 22nd in London. He is still slated, however, to host the Canadian music awards, the Junos, on April 2nd in Ottawa ON.
– CP
★ And “Transformers: The Last Knight” will likely be Michael Bay’s last fling with the long-running franchise. The filmmaker helped bring the 1980s toy line to a new audience when he helmed the 2007 flick “Transformers”. Three more films quickly followed, with the 5th movie in the series, “The Last Knight”, set for release this Summer. Actors Mark Wahlberg, John Turturro, and Tyrese Gibson are all back for the new feature, due to open in movie theaters on June 23rd.

• “APB” (FOX) – Debut of a new series about the under-funded and over-extended Chicago Police Department. Enter billionaire engineer ‘Gideon Reeves’ (played by Justin Kirk), whose technological innovations challenge the police to rethink their jobs.
• “Conan” (TBS/CTV) – Janelle Monáe (“The Electric Lady”).
• “Harry” (syndicated) – Lauren Alaina (“Road Less Traveled”).
• “Jimmy Kimmel Live” (ABC/CityTV) – MUNA (“About U”).
• “Last Call With Carson Daly” (NBC) – Foals (“What Went Down”).
• “Late Late Show With James Corden” (CBS/CTV) – Bruno Mars (“24K Magic”).
• “Late Night With Seth Meyers” (NBC/CTV) – Electric Guest (“Mondo”).
• “Late Show With Stephen Colbert” (CBS/Global) – Highly Suspect (“The Boy Who Died Wolf”).
• “The Real” (syndicated) – Remy Ma (“Seven Winters & Six Summers”).
• “The Shocking Truth” (E!) – From serial killers to the paranormal, this new series explores the real-life events that inspired Hollywood thrillers. It kicks off with back-to-back episodes featuring “The Silence Of the Lambs” and “The Amityville Horror”.
• “Tonight Show Starring Jimmy Fallon” (NBC/CTV2) – Kelsea Ballerini (“The First Time”).
• “24: Legacy” (FOX/City) – The 2nd half of the 2-part debut that got underway after last night’s “Super Bowl”. There’s no ‘Jack Bauer’ in this new version of “24”. Rather, the lead character is ‘Army Ranger Eric Carter’, played by Corey Hawkins.

• The Band Perry – The Grammy-winning country band have announced on Instagram they’re putting out their first pop album. While they haven’t revealed a release date, the new album is apparently titled “My Bad Imagination” and includes a song called “Stay In the Dark”.
• Beyoncé – RadarOnline reveals she & Jay Z are expecting twins later this year thanks to IVF treatments. But their bliss may be busted by a new book from vocal coach David Lee Brewer, who’s releasing the tell-all, “Beyonce: Raising Genius”, on March 31st.
• Black Sabbath – They called it a career Saturday night in the place where it all began 50 years earlier. Ozzy Osbourne and crew put on their final show for fans in Birmingham UK, concluding their legendary run with the band’s first hit, “Paranoid”.
• George Michael – Toxicology tests relating to his December death are said to be ”imminent”, but Thames Valley Police have already told “The Mail on Sunday”: ”We are satisfied that there are no suspicious circumstances.” So cops have apparently ruled out any foul play.
• Little Big Town – They’ll have the #1 song on tomorrow’s new ‘Billboard Hot Country Songs’ chart with “Better Man”.
• Mariah Carey – She’s released the video for her new single “I Don’t”, inspired by her break-up with Australian billionaire James Packer. Sending a clear message to her ex, the diva sets afire the $250,000 custom Valentino gown she was going to wear at their wedding.
• Selena Gomez –She’s teasing new music on Instagram. It’s speculated the new track is called “It Ain’t Me”, which was registered with ASCAP last week. It’s a collaboration with Norwegian DJ, record producer, songwriter, and musician Kygo.
• Zac Brown Band – They’ll release their upcoming album through a new record company for the group. “Welcome Home” will be out May 12th on the band’s Southern Ground label via Elektra.

✓ To get drunk with you.
✓ Some one-on-one time.
✓ Flowers. No, seriously?
✓ Indulge his terrible taste in movies.
✓ You … in lingerie.
✓ A good, short book.
– Condensed from

Neurologists at UK’s University College London have spotted physical differences in the brains of people who experience uncontrollable anger when hearing certain repetitive noises. The technical term for this sound-related rage is ‘misophonia’ (hatred of sound). People who have it experience intense negative emotions when hearing repetitive noises like chewing, a baby crying, lip-smacking, pen-clicking, and foot-tapping. The study shows people with misophonia have more myelin, or insulation, around the gray matter in their prefrontal cortex. Whether this difference is the cause or the result of the disorder remains to be seen. What is known is that those who suffer the malady can experience an increased heart rate and may even begin sweating. (The most irritating noise is …? Microphone feedback? Vomiting? Dental drill?)
– Sourced from “Mental Floss Magazine”

✗ “If you cross your eyes, they’ll stay that way.”
✗ “If you don’t put on a coat, you’ll catch your death of cold.”
✗ “Open your mouth, here comes the airplane …”
✗ “When kids make fun of you, they’re just jealous.”
✗ “You can be anything you want to be.”
✗ “The crust has the most nutritional value.”
✗ “I’ll think about it.”
✗ “If you go out with your hair wet, you’re going to get sick.”
✗ “If you are nice to people, they’ll be nice to you.”
✗ “We’ll see.”
– Adapted from

• A man has sold his back tattoo to a German art collector for €150,000. (Ouch!)
• Malaria has killed half the people who’ve ever lived. (Apparently death has killed the other half.)
– BBC News


1962 [55] Axl Rose (William Rose Jr), Lafayette IN, rock singer (Guns N Roses-“Chinese Democracy”, “Sweet Child O’ Mine”)

1962 [55] Richie McDonald, Lubbock TX, country singer (“How Do I Just Stop”, Lonestar-“Tell Her”)

1964 [53] Gordon Downie, Amherstview ON, rock singer (Tragically Hip-“Bobcaygeon”, “New Orleans Is Sinking”)

1966 [51] Rick Astley, Newton-le-Willows UK, 1980s pop singer (“Never Gonna Give You Up”, “Together Forever”) who enjoyed a brief resurgence thanks to the Internet meme ‘Rickrolling’

1973 [44] Amy Robach, St Joseph MI, TV news anchor (“Good Morning America”)

1993 [24] Tinashe (Jorgenson Kachingwe), Lexington KY, pop singer-songwriter (“Player” f/Chris Brown, “2 On” f/ScHoolboy Q)

• “Canadian Maple Syrup Day”, initiated in 2010 to celebrate the upcoming ‘running of the sap’. About 75% of the world’s supply of maple syrup is produced in the province of Québec.

• “Frozen Yogurt Day”, honoring the alternative to ice cream that has (slightly) less sugar. And the best fro-yo topping is …?

• “International Day of Zero Tolerance to Female Genital Mutilation”, a UN-sponsored day of awareness that’s taken place on February 6th each year since 2003.

• “Pay-A-Compliment Day”, a time to practise the simple act of kindness and compliment a friend, co-worker, or stranger (just before they sue you for harassment). So go ahead, lay it on thick, as in …
• The inspiring expanse of your love handles enlightens all to your zest for life.
• The excellent elegance of your slowing body is truly a sight to see.
• It’s interesting to see you form an opinion as you go.
• Thank-you for giving us a well deserved rest with your absence
• The wonderful vastness of your time-worn face expands our hope for long-life.
• Congratulations on your attempt to sound intelligent.
• You do really well for someone with a rectal-cranial inversion.
• The stupendous expanse of your middle-aged spread amplifies our need for comfy large furniture.
• The inspiring power of your receding hairline adds an inspiring glow to each day.
• You remind me of myself, when I was really young and dumb.

• “Reggae Day”, in celebration of the spirit of the music made popular worldwide by Bob Marley, born on this day in 1945 (died May 11, 1981). It’s celebrated as “Bob Marley Day” in Rastafarianism (Jamaica and Ethiopia).

• “Waitangi Day” in New Zealand (aka “New Zealand Day”), commemorating the signing of an 1840 treaty between Maori chiefs and the British.

2003 [14] ABC-TV’s “20/20” features Martin Bashir’s Brit TV documentary “Living With Michael Jackson” in which Michael admits he has ‘sleep-overs’ with young boys

2011 [06] At Super Bowl 45 in Dallas TX, Christina Aguilera makes headlines by forgetting the lyrics during her rendition of the pre-game anthem (Green Bay defeats Pittsburgh 31-25)

2014 [03] Nirvana’s “Smells Like Teen Spirit” is named ‘Greatest Song of All-Time’ by UK’s “NME” magazine

1952 [65] Queen Elizabeth II ascends to the British throne (she surpasses Queen Victoria’s record as longest-serving British monarch on September 10, 2015)

2005 [12] At Super Bowl 39 in Jacksonville FL, New England captures a 2nd straight Super Bowl title and 3rd-in-4 seasons with a 24-21 victory over Philadelphia

[Tues] Ballet Day
[Tues] Man Day
[Tues] Wave All Your Fingers at Your Neighbors Day
[Wed] Laugh & Get Rich Day
[Wed] Opera Day
[Thurs] Bagel Day
[Thurs] Pizza Day
[Thurs] Read In the Bathtub Day

Burn Awareness Week / Congenital Heart Defect Awareness Week / Dump Your Significant Jerk Week / Freelance Writers Appreciation Week / International Coaching Week / Love Makes the World Go Round but Laughter Keeps Us From Getting Dizzy Week / Marriage Week / Networking Week / Risk Awareness Week / School Counseling Week


Highlight bits culled from 23 years of “Bull Sheet” back issues …
• You’ve ever accidently addressed adults as ‘boys and girls’.
• You believe ‘extremely annoying’ should have its own box on a report card.
• You’ve heard a hundred good reasons for being late.
• You buy Ibuprofen in bulk.
• You don’t want children of your own because there isn’t a name you could hear that wouldn’t elevate your blood pressure.
• Whenever you need some time alone, you pull the fire alarm.
• You want to slap the next person who says, “Must be nice to work from 8-to-3 and have your entire Summers off!”
– First published in “BS” 2003.

Like everyone else, you do it … but do you know what to call it?
• Borborygmi – A rumbling in the stomach.
• Cachinnation – A fit of spontaneous, uproarious, unrestrained laughter.
• Deglutition – The act of swallowing.
• Eructation – The medical term for burping, while the burp itself is called a ructus.
• Lachrymation – Shedding tears, which are produced in the lachrymal glands.
• Mastication – Chewing.
• Nictitation – Blinking or winking.
• Pandiculation – A catchall term for things you do when tired or just waking up, such as yawning, stretching, cracking joints, etc.
• Rhinorrhoea – When your nose runs.
• Sternutation – A sneeze or a sneezing fit.
– First published in “BS” 2015.

What’s the difference between ignorance and apathy? Don’t know and don’t care.

In 18th-century English gambling dens, there was one employee whose only job was to get rid of the dice if there was a police raid. How did they do it?
a. By swallowing them. [CORRECT. Gulp!]
b. By shattering them with a hammer.
c. By throwing them out a window.
– “Gambler’s Digest”

☎ Tell us about the most elaborate lie you’ve ever told.

Question: The average woman has 16 of THESE.
Answer: Pounds she wants to lose.

People usually deserve each other.

Max in the Morn @ Cruise 102.1 [WLEW] Bad Axe MI; Matt Soper @ K Rock 105.7 [CIKR] Kingston ON; Elisha Sears @ Yes FM [WDYS] Towanda PA; Aquila Sadiq @ Vibes 97.3 FM Benin City, Nigeria; Chris Nelson @ The New Planet [KPLD] St George UT; Neil Curran @ ABC100 Portadown, Northern Ireland; Michael Dean @ Luna 103.7 [KLNN] Taos NM; and Patrick Linstruth @ My 99.7 [KDHE] Spring Creek NV.

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