Friday, February 1, 2019 – Edition: #6385

Get Sheet-Faced Every Morning!

BS SHOW BIZ BUZZ:
★ “The Big Bang Theory” is bringing in a bunch of guest stars for a special “Dungeons & Dragons” themed episode.  Lined up to appear are:  William Shatner, Kareem Abdul-Jabbar, Kevin Smith, Joe Manganiello and frequent guest star — and Sheldon nemesis — Wil Wheaton. An airdate has not yet been announced.
-TheWrap
★ Gwyneth Paltrow is being sued for more than $3 million after being accused of committing a “hit-and-run ski crash” that left a man seriously injured. The lawsuit, filed this week in Utah, claims Paltrow was “skiing too fast for her ability on a beginner run” when she ran into Terry Sanderson, who was nearing the end of the slope. The victim claims to have suffered four broken ribs, “permanent traumatic brain injury” and emotional distress from the collision.  A rep for Paltrow’s company Goop said the lawsuit is “completely without merit”
-TheWrap
★ Ashton Kutcher has shared his phone number on social media. In a tweet, he wrote: ”I miss having a real connection w/ real people. My Community. From now on you can just text me. I won’t be able to respond to everyone but at least we can be real w/ each other…”  That was followed with a phone number and the words “Yes this is my#”.  He later deleted his number, promising to repost it later.
(As an actor, that’s one way to make sure your phone keeps ringing!)
-MSN
★ Kylie Jenner spent insane amounts of money on the delivery app Postmates last year—dropping $10,000 on a truly random array of food, according to TMZ. At one point, she requested a single carrot be delivered to her door. But the best nugget of info to come out of Kylie’s ordering history is what she purchased right before having Stormi: Oreo McFlurries, 10pc chicken nuggets, and French fries.
(McFlurries, then a Stormi.  Go figure.)
-Cosmopolitan
★ Céline Dion is getting her own biopic. “The Power of Love” will chronicle her rise to fame from a shy French-Canadian girl to one of the most successful singers of all time. It will also explore her evolving relationship with her manager and husband, the late René Angélil, with whom she began working  when she was 12 years old. France-born actress/singer Valérie Lemercier is slated to both direct and star in the movie, for which Dion has apparently given permission to use her full catalog of songs.  It is set for a December, 2020 release.
-Yahoo

TODAY’S SHOW BIZ SKED:
• “The Tonight Show starring Jimmy Fallon” (NBC/CTV): Anthony Mackie, Tim Gunn, Matthew Broussard
• “The Late Show with Stephen Colbert” (CBS/Global): Rep. Alexandria Ocasio-Cortez, Method Man (R)
• “Late Night with Seth Meyers” (NBC/CTV): Connie Britton, Dave Franco, Chris Kelly, Sarah Schneider, Venzella Joy (R)
• “The Late Late Show with James Corden” (CBS/CTV): Melissa McCarthy, Richard E. Grant, Mark Wahlberg, Ian Karmel (R)
• “The View” (ABC/CTV): Will Arnett, Emeril Lagasse, Deborah Roberts
• “The Talk” (CBS): Matt LeBlanc
• “Live with Kelly and Ryan” (ABC/CTV): Daniel Radcliffe
• “The Ellen DeGeneres Show” (NBC/CTV): Brie Larson

SATURDAY-
• “NFL Honors” (CBS): Celebrating the 2018 NFL season with awards for MVP, Coach of the Year and many more, plus the unveiling of the 2019 Pro Football Hall of Fame class.
• “Hallmark Channel’s 1st Annual Cat Bowl” (HALLMARK): Adorable and adoptable adult “cat-letes” compete in a gridiron game for the ages. Plus, inspirational stories of senior and special needs cats.

SUNDAY-
• “Puppy Bowl XV” (ANIMAL PLANET): Two teams of adorable puppies, aptly named Team Ruff and Team Fluff, compete in a fur-raising game of four-legged football.
• “Super Bowl LIII” (CBS): New England Patriots vs. Los Angeles Rams from Mercedes-Benz Stadium in Atlanta. Maroon 5 headlines the halftime show. They will be joined by rappers Travis Scott and Big Boi.

BS MUSIC NOTES:
• Justin Bieber — has officially launched his “Drew House” clothing line, named after himself (Drew is his middle name). Items range in price from $48 – $148, including beige corduroy pieces, tees, and sweatsuits featuring a smiley face that has “drew” for a mouth.
• Ariana Grande — recently debuted a new tattoo on the palm of her hand which featured Japanese characters that she thought spelled out “7 Rings” — the title of her new single. Unfortunately, the tattoo artist forgot a couple key characters … and the tat actually means “Japanese-style barbecue grill”.
• Drake – made a late-night run to Mickey D’s and handed over $20,000 in cold hard cash to two lucky L.A. area McDonald’s employees. Last year he gave away $1 million to Miami residents while filming his ‘God’s Plan’ music video.
• AC/DC – Former singer Brian Johnson has reportedly confirmed that he’ll handle the vocals on a new AC/DC album. He was forced to quit the band in 2016 after suffering hearing loss.  Last year, it was reported that the group was working on a new album in Vancouver.
• KISS – Former guitarist Ace Frehley blasted Gene Simmons in response to Simmons’ claim that Frehley was fired due to “drugs, alcohol, bad behavior, being unprofessional” … and would never be allowed back in the band. Frehley says he was never fired, but quit twice.  Then, he called Simmons a sex addict and alleged his own wife was groped by Simmons.
• Maren Morris – says she didn’t mean to give the impression that she was pregnant when she posted a vacation snap to Instagram with her new husband Ryan Hurd and the caption: “Gonna have your babies.”
To some fans, the post read like a pregnancy announcement.  Morris says, I was like, ‘Oh…(shoot), I really didn’t think this one through.'”
• Dixie Chicks — singer Natalie Maines’ estranged husband Adrian Pasdar is accusing her of not paying him support, and is asking a judge to award him over $60,000 a month. He claims Maines makes about $2 million a year, while he sacrificed his career as an actor to focus couple’s children while they were together.

TODAY’S MOVIE OPENINGS:
• “Miss Bala” (PG-13, Action/Adventure):  Gloria finds a power she never knew she had when she is drawn into a dangerous world of cross-border crime. Surviving will require all of her cunning, inventiveness, and strength. Based on the Spanish-language film. (Gina Rodriguez, Anthony Mackie)
• “Velvet Buzzsaw” (R-Rated, Comedy/Drama):  After a series of paintings by an unknown artist are discovered, a supernatural force enacts revenge on those who have allowed their greed to get in the way of art. (Jake Gyllenhaal, Billy Magnussen, Toni Collette)
• “Arctic” (PG-13, Drama):  A man stranded in the Arctic after an airplane crash must decide whether to remain in the relative safety of his makeshift camp or to embark on a deadly trek through the unknown in hopes of making it out alive. (Mads Mikkelsen, Maria Thelma Smáradóttir)
• “They Shall Not Grow Old” (R-Rated, Documentary): A documentary about World War I with never-before-seen footage to commemorate the centennial of the end of the war.

IT’S ALL OVER TOWN:
A St. John’s, NL councillor is so sick of winter weather that he wants to bring the warmth outside.  He is proposing that the city install heated sidewalks.  Sandy Hickman has asked city engineers to look at heating a small section of downtown sidewalk that’s already scheduled for repair work, as a pilot project.  While some other Canadian cities have experimented with the idea, none seem to have stuck with it.  But Hickman says when Holland, Michigan added a hot-water tubing system under city sidewalks, they noticed fewer slips and falls, and enjoyed savings on salt, sand, and snow removal, plus extended pavement life. Hickman feels that safer winter sidewalks for pedestrians could also give struggling businesses a boost, and if it works out downtown, he hopes it could be applied in other pedestrian-heavy areas of town.
(We’re going to need some concrete proof that it works…)
(I’m just wondering if these things can be made to flip to A/C mode in the summer?)
(***Caution***) Which do you prefer — burning the ice off, or freezing your ass off?)
-CP

TOO STUPID FOR US TO MAKE UP:
➢ A woman in Georgia thought she was doing something nice when she donated an old travel mug among her contributions to Goodwill.  And she was…to the tune of $6,500 worth.  She wasn’t aware that her son had stored cash from the recent sale of his car inside the mug.  When she realized what she had done, Lindsay Preiss contacted Goodwill, who searched surveillance footage, but still have not found the lucky person who purchased the yellow mug with a Mickey Mouse sticker and $6,500 inside.  A reward is being offered.
(“Stop crying or I’ll give you something to cry about.  Oh, wait.  I just did…”)
-NewYorkPost
➢ A Pennsylvania man claims his emotional support alligator helps him deal with depression.  65-year-old Joie Henney says his registered emotional support animal named Wally likes to snuggle and give hugs, despite being a 5-foot-long alligator. Henney says Wally eats chicken wings and shares an indoor plastic pond with a smaller rescue alligator named Scrappy.  The alligator has never bitten anyone and is afraid of cats.  Henny says that Wally is “just like a dog.  He wants to be loved and petted.” He received approval from his doctor to use Wally as his emotional support animal after not wanting to go on medication for depression.
(Is he sure Wally isn’t luggage?)
-AP
➢ A woman is suing a New York hospital after she gave them permission to withdraw her dying brother’s life support, only to realize that she had just signed off on the death of a complete stranger.  Shirell Powell gave her consent to pull the stranger’s plug after sitting next to his hospital bed for two weeks, believing it was her brother.  Doctors said there was little to no hope for the patient, whose face was obscured by tubes, so she signed the consent form to have life support removed.  But when the autopsy results came back, it became clear that the hospital made a grave error, mistaking a patient named Freddy Clarence Williams for Powell’s brother, Frederick Williams.  Both men were 40 years old.  Her brother was eventually found. In jail.
(Not on death row, I hope…)
-AllThatisInteresting

DID YOU KNOW?
22.7 million Americans are expected put down wagers on Sunday’s Super Bowl.  It is expected that $6 billion in total bets will be made…$320 million worth legally.
-USAToday

BS CHRONOMETER 02.01.19

TODAY’S CELEBIRTHDAYS . . .
1968 [51] Pauly Shore, Los Angeles CA, movie actor (“Encino Man”, “Son in Law”, “Bio-Dome”)

1968 [51] Lisa Marie Presley, Memphis TN, pop singer (‘Lights Out’), daughter of the “King of Rock and Roll”, Elvis Presley/one-time wife of the “King of Pop”, Michael Jackson)

1969 [50] Patrick Wilson, Buffalo NY, rock drummer (Weezer-‘Buddy Holly’, ‘Africa’)

1971 [48] Michael C Hall, Raleigh NC, TV actor (“Dexter” 2006-13, “Six Feet Under” 2001-05)/Broadway actor (“Lazarus” 2015-17)

1975 [44] Big Boi (Antwan Patton), Savannah GA, hip-hop artist (f/Kelly Rowland-‘Mama Told Me’, OutKast-‘Hey Ya!’)

1987 [32] Ronda Rousey, Riverside CA, MMA fighter (won 12 consecutive MMA fights, six in the Ultimate Fighting Championship (UFC), before suffering her first loss, to Holly Holm in November 2015), now signed to WWE

1994 [25] Harry Styles, Holmes Chapel UK, boy-band singer (One Direction-‘Story of My Life’, ‘What Makes You Beautiful’)/solo artist (‘Sign of the Times’)

SATURDAY-
Chef Ina Garten (“Barefoot Contessa”) is 71; Reality star Duane ‘Dog’ Chapman (“Dog the Bounty Hunter”) is 67; Model Christie Brinkley is 65; Pop singer Shakira (‘Hips Don’t Lie’) is 42; TV actress Zosia Mamet (“Girls”) is 31

SUNDAY-
Broadway actor Nathan Lane (“The Producers”) is 63; TV actress Maura Tierney (“The Affair”) is 54; Movie actress Isla [Eye-luh] Fisher (“Wedding Crashers”) is 43; Reggae singer Sean Kingston (‘Beautiful Girls’) is 29

BS REASONS TO PARTY . . .
• “Car Insurance Day”, which commemorates the 1st auto insurance policy, issued to one Truman Martin of Buffalo NY on this date in 1898. It cost $11.50 (96 cents if he paid monthly)

• “Change Your Password Day”, an annual reminder that ‘123456′ is not keeping your data all that safe.

• “Spunky Old Broads Day”, dedicated to the saying ‘old girls just wanna have fun’. Spunky old broads are positive, fun, butt-kicking mature women over the age of 50 who refuse to sit back quietly and get old. Who’s the spunkiest famous old broad? Betty White?

• “G.I. Joe Day”, the name was inspired by 1945 Robert Mitchum movie “The Story of GI Joe”. FACTOID: Hasbro invented the term ‘action figure’ because it thought boys wouldn’t play with a ‘doll’.

• “Bubblegum Day”, everyone who donates 50 cents or more gets to chew gum in school, with proceeds going to any charity the school chooses. Kids have fun, while raising money for a good cause. Some creative teachers even incorporate bubble gum into their lessons for the day!

• “Winterlude” through February 18, the annual, celebrating the season outdoors in Canada’s capital region of Ottawa-Gatineau. Highlights include ice sculptures, a playground made of snow, and best of all, the Rideau Canal, touted as the World’s Longest Skating Rink.

SATURDAY-
• “Groundhog Day”, a 133-year tradition that perpetuates the hogwash that a hibernating groundhog prodded from its burrow can forecast 6 more weeks of Winter by seeing its shadow. This annual oddity stems from the Christian celebration of “Candlemas”. An old Scottish poem proclaims, “If Candlemas is fair and clear, there’ll be two winters in the year.” In Mexico, today is known as “Dia de la Candelaria”, a big day for bullfights and festivals.
– Canada’s best known groundhog prognosticator is ‘Wiarton Willie’.
– ‘Punxsutawney Phil’ is America’s original forecaster and most famous hog.
NET: http://www.groundhog.org
• “Crêpe Day” (aka “La Chandeleur”) in France, when the traditional thin pancakes are served, filled with either sweet or savory goodies. On this day it’s customary to hold a coin in one hand and the crêpe pan in the other as you flip the crêpe into the air. If you manage to catch it in the pan, it’s said that your family will be prosperous for the rest of the year.
• “World Play Your Ukulele Day”, offering uke players a chance to ‘change the world 4 strings at a time’ by playing, sharing, and teaching others to play the mini-guitar.

SUNDAY-
• “Carrot Cake Day”, saluting an idea hatched in the Middle Ages. At that time, sugar and other sweeteners were rare and very expensive, so people used sweet vegetables for flavor.
• “The Day The Music Died”, On 3rd Feb 1959, 22-year-old Buddy Holly, the Big Bopper, and Ritchie Valens, aged 17, died in a plane crash shortly after takeoff from Clear Lake, Iowa. The pilot of the single-engine Beechcraft Bonanza was also killed.
• “Super Bowl Sunday”, usually observed on the first Sunday in February and is sometimes referred to as an unofficial national holiday.

THIS DAY IN SHOW BIZ . . .
2004 [15] In the infamous “Super Bowl Wardrobe Malfunction”, Justin Timberlake rips Janet Jackson’s top during the halftime show, exposing her breast (leading to a year of excruciating media censorship)

2017 [02] In a post on Instagram that is liked over 8 million times in 24 hours, Beyoncé reveals she is pregnant with twins

TODAY’S MUSIC EVENT . . .
2008 [11] NASA announces that “Across the Universe” by The Beatles will become the first song ever beamed directly into space via the ‘Deep Space Network’

TODAY’S FIRST . . .
2009 [10] Johanna Siguroardottir is chosen the 1st female Prime Minister of Iceland, also becoming the world’s 1st openly gay head of a country

TODAY’S RECORDS . . .
2006 [13] 100-lb competitive eater Sonya Thomas chows down on 26 sandwiches in 10 minutes to win the “World Grilled Cheese Eating Championship”

2013 [06] “The Shard”, tallest building in the European Union, officially opens in London UK

2015 [04] New England Patriots win Super Bowl 49, beating Seattle Seahawks 28-24; Patriots QB Tom Brady is named MVP and becomes 1 of only 3 quarterbacks to win 4 Super Bowls (he has won another since…)

BULL’S BITS

BS WACK FOOTBALL FACTS:
✓ It takes about 600 cows to make one full season’s worth of NFL footballs.
✓ Though football games usually last around 3 hours, the ball is typically in play for only 11 minutes. Around 56% of the game on TV is devoted to replays.
✓ Contrary to common opinion, the “G” on the Green Bay Packers helmet doesn’t stand for Green Bay. Rather, it stands for “Greatness.”
✓ Helmets weren’t mandatory for football players until 1939.
✓ The shortest NFL player was Jack “Soapy” Shapiro, who was 5’1″ and weighed 119 pounds. He was a blocking back for the Staten Island Stapeltons (“Stapes”) in 1929.
✓ During Super Bowl halftime, there are an estimated 90 million toilet flushes. That’s equivalent to 180 million gallons of water flowing at once, or 3.5 minutes water flowing over Niagara Falls.
-FactRetriever

BS BAD TAILGATING ACTIVITIES:
• Grilling and eating whatever animal is your team’s mascot
• Flaming lawn darts
• Alcoholics Anonymous meeting
• Quietly reading a romance novel
• Beekeeping
• Blacking out before the burgers are done
• Shooting at propane tanks to get pumped
• Tailgating. Literally.
• Keg-stands.  Trust me on that.
• Dieting
-Twitter

BEST OF ‘BS’ . . .
PET PEEVES OF EMPLOYEES AT BIG & TALL MEN’S STORES:
• Fat guys who get their in-seam measured a couple of times and then don’t buy anything.
• When a size-54 doesn’t close the dressing room curtain.
• When Zach Galifianakis tries to return old bathing suits.
• Annoying ‘thwack’ sound when a customer walks into the ceiling fan.
• When a big & tall guy gets wedged in the doorframe and you have to call the fire department.
• Trying to find Lycra cycling pants with a 50-inch waist, 20-inch leg.
• While fitting a fat guy on your lunch hour, he asks if you’re going to finish that sandwich.
• Two words … broken chairs.
– First published in “BS” 2012.
NET: http://www.FreeRadioPrep.ca

BS RANDOM JOKE:
The world’s fastest land mammal is definitely a toddler who’s been asked what’s in their mouth.

BS U-PICK SUPER BOWL TRIVIA:
• This QB holds the Super Bowl record for highest completion percentage (88%, min 20 passes)
a. Jeff Hostetler
b. Phil Simms [CORRECT]
c. Eli Manning
d. Ken Anderson

• This franchise won their Super Bowl-record 6th title at Super Bowl XLIII in the 2008 season.
a. Dallas Cowboys
b. San Francisco 49ers
c. Pittsburgh Steelers [CORRECT]
d. Oakland/LA Raiders

• Which NFL player guaranteed his team would win Super Bowl III the week before the big game?
a. Joe Namath [CORRECT]
b. Don Shula
c. Johnny Unitas
d. Jeff Hostetler
-NFL

BS PHONE STARTER:
The best Super Bowl halftime show ever was …?

BS WATER COOLER QUESTION:
Question:  1 in 12 people are rebels when it comes to breakfast because they do THIS.  What is it?
Answer:  Pour milk into the bowl before the cereal

BS DEEP THOUGHT:
All things are possible with coffee and mascara.