Thursday, January 18, 2007 Edition: #3448
Bully For You!
BS SHOW BIZ BUZZ:
TODAY through January 28th, Robert Redford‘s 26th annual “Sundance Film Festival” reels in Park City UT, one of the world’s premiere venues for independent film (for the first time, this year’s short films will be available through the Apple iTunes website) . . . TONIGHT polar opposites Bill O’Reilly (“The O’Reilly Factor” on Fox News) and Stephen Colbert (“The Colbert Report” on Comedy Central) are trading appearances on each other’s shows in a bit of stunt programming . . . Jennifer Lopez is helping to develop a new TV series called “Ayuda” (Showtime) that’s set in the world of Latina nannies (she’ll produce and serve as a writer – as if she knows what it’s like being hired help) . . . In her latest exhibition of excess, Victoria Beckham has reportedly blown $97,500 on upscale merchandise from Hollywood kids boutique Petit Tresor, including soccer-inspired room fittings to decorate her 3 sons’ rooms in their new LA mansion (yet to be found), plus a red leather Hermes diaper bag . . . FOX has started production on a reality TV series titled “When Women Rule the World”, in which 12 macho, chauvinistic guys become man-servants for 12 attractive women who run their own closed society (last man standing wins $250,000) . . . Jessica Simpson dumpee Nick Lachey has apparently popped the question to his MTV host-girlfriend Vanessa Minnillo and friends say the couple plans to marry THIS APRIL . . . New rumored couples in Hollywood include Orlando Bloom & Penelope Cruz, who are said to be inseparable after celebrating his 30th birthday together at an LA nightclub; and actress Renee Zellweger is said to be dating former “Beverly Hills 90210” star Luke Perry (that’s dating ‘below the line’ don’t cha think, darlin’?) . . . And Angelina Jolie & Brad Pitt have purchased a home in the historic French Quarter of New Orleans LA and are moving their family there while Pitt shoots his new movie, “The Curious Case Of Benjamin Button” (and their world disaster site tour continues).
BS MUSIC NOTES:
• The Beatles – THIS WEEK The Cavern Club, the former fruit warehouse and air raid shelter in Liverpool UK where they staged some of their earliest performances, is celebrating its 50th birthday. It opened as a jazz venue in 1957.
• Bob Dylan – The 65-year-old folk-rock icon has reportedly purchased a $4-million Edwardian mansion in Scotland. The 10-bedroom ‘Aultmore House’ is renowned as one the finest homes in the Scottish Highlands.
• Elton John – He’ll celebrate his 60th birthday MARCH 25th with a spectacular 2-hour show at NYC’s Madison Square Garden. It will be filmed for a TV special which will also include behind-the-scenes footage of a private birthday party the night before.
• Five For Fighting – TONIGHT they perform on the “Tonight Show With Jay Leno” (NBC/A Channel).
• Jay Z – According to the Humane Society, his Rocawear clothing line continues to sell a $265 jacket containing real raccoon dog fur in its collar (a dog indigenous to Asia) while claiming it uses only faux fur. The company was reportedly advised of the critter content LAST MONTH.
• Keith Urban – His first performance since finishing 3 months of rehab at the Betty Ford Center will be a radio station charity event in Chicago FEBRUARY 8th. He’ll then kick off as the “Love, Pain & the Whole Crazy Thing World Tour” with a series of club dates in Britain and Germany this APRIL, followed by arena shows in Australia in MAY, then US & Canadian arenas in JUNE.
• Pharrell – TONIGHT he guests on “Jimmy Kimmel Live” (ABC).
A selection of movies in the making …
• “Brief Interviews With Hideous Men” – John Krasinski (‘Jim Halpert’ on “The Office”) makes his directorial debut with this film about a female graduate student who conducts interviews with various men after a messy breakup. The film will feature Will Forte (“Saturday Night Live”), Mila Kunis (“That 70’s Show”), Rashida Jones (“The Office”), and Death Cab For Cutie singer Ben Gibbard in his movie debut.
• “Death Of A Dissident” – Director Michael Mann has entered the race against Johnny Depp to make a film about Alexander Litvinenko, the ex-KGB agent who was fatally poisoned with the radioactive drug polonium-210 in London LAST YEAR. Mann’s film is based on the yet unpublished book by Litvinenko’s widow. Johnny Depp’s production company had already announced plans to make a film on the same subject, based on the book “Sasha’s Story: The Life & Death Of A Russian Spy”, currently being written by “NY Times” correspondent Alan Cowell. It’s not been confirmed if Depp will star in the film.
• “Rabbit Hole” – Nicole Kidman has signed on to star in and produce a bigscreen adaptation of the Broadway play about a happily married couple whose lives are disrupted after an unforeseen tragedy. The stage play starred Tyne Daly (“Cagney & Lacey”) and Cynthia Nixon (“Sex & the City”), but no movie cast has yet been announced.
• “Untitled Queen Bio-Film” – Johnny Depp is also the first choice to play late Queen frontman Freddie Mercury in a planned bio-film about the flamboyant rocker. Queen guitarist Brian May is developing the movie in alliance with Robert DeNiro’s Tribeca Productions.
FAVORITE MOVIE STARS:
According to a newly-released Harris Poll, here are the screen stars we like best …
5. [TIE] Will Smith / Julia Roberts
4. Clint Eastwood
3. John Wayne (who died in 1979)
2. Tom Hanks
1. Denzel Washington
GETTING A WINTER TAN:
Even though it’s JANUARY you should be using sunscreen experts say. Dermatologists recommend year-round sunscreen use because the rays that cause skin cancer, wrinkling and age spots are still out there even thought they may be somewhat diminished in winter. The Skin Cancer Foundation estimates that just 20% of us wear sunscreen in winter. NYC dermatologist Deborah Sarnoff admits it may not matter if you are dark-skinned and dark-eyed and indoors all day, but the rest of us should take the advice seriously, especially when spending lots of time outside in the snow, which reflects and intensifies the sun’s rays.
– “Globe & Mail”
SINGLE WHITE BRIT:
The new book “They Call Me Naughty Lola” is a compilation of hilarious personal ads taken from the pages of the UK’s “London Review of Books”. A few highlights …
• “They call me naughty Lola. Run-of-the-mill beardy physicist (M, 46).”
• “Bald, short, fat and ugly male, 53, seeks short-sighted woman with tremendous sexual appetite.”
• “Either I’m desperately unattractive, or you are all lesbians. Bald, pasty man (61) with nervous tick and unclassifiable skin complaint believes it to be the latter but holds out hope for dominant (yet straight) fems.”
• “My finger on the pulse of culture, my ear to the ground of philosophy, my hip in the medical waste bin of Glasgow Royal Infirmary. 14% plastic and counting – geriatric brainiac and compulsive malingering fool (M, 81), looking for richer, older sex-starved woman on the brink of death to exploit and ruin every replacement operation I’ve had since 1974.”
• “These ads try too hard to be funny. Not me, I’m a natural. Juggling, monkey-faced idiot (M, 36).”
– “Curious Times”
HOW TO BOOST YOUR IMMUNE SYSTEM:
Just because everyone else is sneezing and wheezing this winter doesn’t mean you have to join the club. Check out these tips for avoiding colds and flu …
• Probiotics found in some types of yogurt are the ‘good-cop’ bacteria that can fight the ‘bad-cop’ bacteria in your body.
• Whey, the liquid by-product of cheesemaking, contains a protein-rich compound that builds up resistance. It can be bought in natural health stores.
• Get a daily dose of exercise. Researchers believe that people who work out regularly cut their risk of catching a cold in half compared to their sluggish counterparts.
• Be positive! In a recent study those with a more optimistic outlook on life had better immunity than their more pessimistic peers.
• Hit your happy weight. ‘Yo-yo dieting’ can prevent killer T-cells from defending the body against invading bacteria or viruses.
• Hang with friends. Isolated people tend to have weakened immune systems, possibly due to higher stress levels.
• Wash your hands. Regular hand-washing remains the #1 way to reduce your odds of catching a cold or the flu. Recent stats find that infected folks spread viruses to 35% of the surfaces they touch.
HAPPY BIRTHDAY DEAR HANDS:
The best way to combat bugs that spread the common cold is to sing the tune “Happy Birthday” to yourself as you wash your hands. Experts say singing the well known ditty twice is the perfect length of time needed to wash germs and bacteria off your hands. Britain’s Health Minister Andy Kerr is such a big believer, he’s included the novel approach as part of a new $5-million campaign to raise awareness of public health.
– “The Scotsman”
ARE BIRTHDAYS EXCESSIVE?
THIS WEEK a group of parents in St Paul MN has launched the advocacy association ‘Birthdays Without Pressure’ in an attempt to turn down the volume on out-of-control kids’ birthday parties. The idea is to encourage parents not to go overboard with birthday party celebrations. Among the real-life festivities the group cites as excessive: A 1st birthday party with 60 guests at which the baby of honor slept through 2 hours of gift opening; and what may be the all-time capper: A $10-million party thrown for a 13-year-old in NYC that included $10,000-gift bags for guests and entertainment by Aerosmith and 50 Cent.
FOLLOWING FASHION RELIGIOUSLY:
Pope Benedict XVI’s 50-year-old private secretary has inspired Donatella Versace to create a new trend in men’s fashion, ‘The Clergyman Look’. Father Georg Gaenswein’s regular wardrobe features grey/black trousers and a jacket with a clerical-style collar. Versace says to create the ‘priestly chic’ look she was searching for a ‘severe and ethical men’, and she found Father Georg’s austerity very elegant.
LIFE BY THE NUMBERS:
A snapshot of who we are and what we do …
• 70% of spouses do not know how much money their husband/wife makes.
• 50% of female employees think they know more than their bosses.
• 40% of the American population has never visited a dentist.
• 35% of those who use personal ads for dating are already married.
• 29% of women say they would prefer to be lied to about being fat.
• 5% of people have tried to break a cement block at least once in their lifetime.
THE BULL SHEET 01.18.07
TODAY’S CELEBIRTHDAYS . . .
1955  Kevin Costner, Lynwood CA, movie actor/director (Oscar-“Dances With Wolves”)
1961  Mark Messier, St Albert AB, NHL center 1979-2004 (NY Rangers, Vancouver Canucks, Edmonton Oilers)/6 Stanley Cups/15-time NHL All-Star/future Hockey Hall of Famer
1969  Jesse L Martin, Rocky Mountain VA, TV actor (‘Detective Ed Green’ on “Law & Order” since 1999)/movie actor (“Rent”)
1971  Jonathan Davis, Bakersfield CA, rock singer (Korn-“Coming Undone”, “Did My Time”)
BS REASONS TO PARTY . . .
• “Cut Yourself Some Slack Day”, a day to ‘do unto ourselves what we would have others do unto us’. Hey, give yourself a break!
• “Winnie the Pooh Day”, honoring the birthday of “Winnie-the-Pooh” author AA Milne (1882-1956) in London UK.
THIS DAY IN SHOW BIZ . . .
2000  38-year-old TV actor Michael J Fox announces he’s leaving “Spin City” to fight Parkinson’s disease
TODAY’S MUSIC EVENT . . .
1996  Lisa Marie Presley files for divorce from Michael Jackson
TODAY’S FIRST . . .
1917  ‘Income Tax’ is introduced in Canada as a ‘temporary measure’ to help war effort
1994  1st ‘Automatic Breadmaker’ debuts at Chicago’s “International Housewares Show”
1996  1st computer software on DVD is released (phone listings for the entire USA)
TODAY’S RECORD . . .
1997  Norwegian Borge Ousland crosses Antarctica, all 1,675 miles … alone! (so how do we really know if he did it?)
COMING UP . . .
[Fri] International Sing-Out Day
[Fri] Penguin Awareness Day
[Sat] Muharram (Islamic New Year)
[Sat] 18th Producers Guild of America Awards
[Sun] Squirrel Appreciation Day
[Mon] Answer Your Cat’s Question Day
[Mon] Rid the World of Fad Diets Day
This Week Is … Let Men Be Our Heroes Week
This Month Is … Celebration of Life Month
MOST POPULAR DOG BREEDS IN AMERICA:
According to new figures from the American Kennel Club, the popularity of ‘toy-dog’ breeds has virtually doubled over the past 30 years. Here are the most popular pooches in 2007 …
4. Golden Retriever
3. German Shepherd
2. Yorkshire Terrier
1. Labrador Retrievers (16th year in-a-row)
– “NY Times”
BS CYNICS GUIDE TO LIFE:
• The journey of a thousand miles begins with a broken fan belt and a leaky tire.
• Follow your dream! Unless it’s the one where you’re at work in your underwear during a fire drill.
• Always take time to stop and smell the roses … and sooner or later, you’ll inhale a bee.
• It’s always darkest before dawn. So if you’re going to steal the neighbor’s newspaper, that’s the time to do it.
• It’s a small world. So you gotta use your elbows a lot.
• Love is like a roller coaster. When it’s good you don’t want to get off, and when it isn’t you can’t wait to throw up.
BR RANDOM JOKE:
For every great musician, there was a next-door neighbor who said, “Man, I wish they would shut up.”
TRUTH OR BS?
Are the following statements true, or just a load of hooey?
• The telephone country code for Russia is ‘007′. [TRUE]
• Up until a thousand years ago, cats walked on their hind legs only. [BS]
• Grapes explode when you put them in the microwave. [TRUE]
• There’s a municipality in Newfoundland named ‘Dildo’. [TRUE]
• There is a town in Texas called ‘Ding Dong’. [TRUE]
• The odds of being killed by a tornado are 1 in 2 million. [TRUE]
• The term ‘hot dog’ was coined in the early 1900s by a cartoonist who couldn’t spell ‘dachshund’. [BS]
• A baby born in-flight is given free air travel for the rest of his life.[BS]
• The white part of your fingernail is called the ‘lunula’. [TRUE]
• Apple is developing the ‘iLoo’, an Internet-capable portable toilet. [BS]
• A mosquito has 47 teeth. [TRUE]
BS WATER COOLER QUESTION:
Today’s Question: Slightly more women than men do THIS in the bathroom.
Answer to Give Out Next Show: Listen to the radio.
BS DEEP THOUGHT:
Ideas off the top of the head are often like dandruff … small and flaky.