Friday, January 18, 2019 – Edition: #6375
Bully For You!
BS SHOW BIZ BUZZ:
★ Chris Hansen — best known for hosting the NBC show “To Catch a Predator” — turned himself into police on Monday after being accused of writing a bad check. Hansen allegedly bounced a $13,000 check to a local vendor in November 2017 for marketing items such as mugs, t-shirts, and decals. The vendor filed a complaint with police last April because the bill was still unpaid. He was charged with issuing a bad check and was subsequently released after signing a written promise to appear in court.
(Which we hope is worth more than the checks that the guy has been writing!)
-TheBlast
★ Steve Carell and “The Office” creator Greg Daniels are reuniting for a Netflix series inspired by President Trump. Carell will star in the series, which is described as a workplace comedy centered around a group of people tasked with creating a sixth branch of the armed services. Sources note the idea for the series was sparked by Trump’s June order to establish Space Force as the sixth military branch. Sources say Carell’s salary for “Space Force” the show — including co-creator and exec producer fees — sets a new overall record for talent, likely topping the $1 million per episode paydays of the cast of “The Big Bang Theory”.
-MSN
★ (***CAUTION: A-hole***) Ewan McGregor’s daughter Clara had some harsh words for her father in a recent Instagram comment in which she branded him an “A-hole.” McGregor split from his wife in 2017 after 22 years of marriage, and began dating his “Fargo” co-star Mary Elizabeth Winstead. In early 2018, he filed for divorce, citing “irreconcilable differences.” The recent Instagram comment is the first time Clara has publicly lashed out against her father since the split.
-MSN
★ Michelle Pfeiffer is now a part of the Instagram nation, and her debut post was beyond purrfect. After joining the social media platform on Wednesday, 60-year-old Pfeiffer posted a clip of herself as Selina Kyle aka “Catwoman” from 1992’s “Batman Returns.” In the throwback clip, Catwoman acrobatically makes her way toward Batman and Penguin. After reaching them, she simply says, “Meow.”
(Link: https://tinyurl.com/yat9rm5r )
-MSN
TODAY’S SHOW BIZ SKED:
• “The Tonight Show starring Jimmy Fallon” (NBC/CTV): Jada Pinkett Smith, Sebastian Maniscalco, Martha Stewart
• “The Late Show with Stephen Colbert” (CBS/Global): William H. Macy
• “Late Night with Seth Meyers” (NBC/CTV): Andy Samberg, Josh Hutcherson, Charlie Hall (R)
• “The Late Late Show with James Corden” (CBS/CTV): Will Ferrell, RuPaul (R)
• “The View” (ABC/CTV):Day of Hot Topics
• “The Talk” (CBS): Jane Fonda, Lily Tomlin
• “Live with Kelly and Ryan” (ABC/CTV): William H. Macy, Elle King, Meaghan Murphy
• “The Ellen DeGeneres Show” (NBC/CTV): Samuel L. Jackson, Pete Holmes, Michael Bublé, Muse
• “Dynasty” (CW): In the wake of a horrific accident, Culhane desperately needs Fallon’s help and protection, while processing the sheer weight of his lies.
• “Howie Mandel Presents Howie Mandel at the Howie Mandel Comedy Club” (SHOWTIME): Howie Mandel’s first stand-up comedy special in over 20 years.
SATURDAY-
• “Brexit” (HBO): Benedict Cumberbatch stars in a HBO/BBC feature that centers on key members of the “Leave” and “Remain” campaigns in the lead-up to the Brexit vote in 2016.
• “Winter Love Story” (HALLMARK): When new author Cassie Winslett’s first novel isn’t selling, she is paired on a book tour with the best-selling author Elliot Somersby to boost Cassie’s sales and her confidence – but along the way a romance starts to blossom.
• “Saturday Night Live” (NBC): Rachel Brosnahan hosts, with musical guest Greta Van Fleet
SUNDAY-
• “Watch What Happens Live” (Bravo): Cynthia Bailey, RuPaul
• “NFL Playoffs” (CBS): New England Patriots at Kansas City Chiefs in the AFC championship game.
• “Shameless” (SHOWTIME): Ingrid ropes Frank into fulfilling her lifelong dream.
BS MUSIC NOTES:
• Justin Bieber — isn’t having cold feet after all. Amid rumors that he is delaying his nuptials to Hailey Baldwin, the pair have sent out “Save the Date” invites to friends and family members. The couple, who were married at a courthouse in Sept., will tie the knot on Feb. 28. A location was not revealed on the invites.
• Hozier – debuted his new song ‘Almost (Sweet Music)’ this week, and announced that his sophomore album “Wasteland Baby!” will be released March 1. A U.S. tour will kick off March 10.
• The Cranberries — On Tuesday, one year after singer Delores O’Riordan died at the age of 46, they unveiled a song from their final album, “In the End”. ‘All Over Now’ is the first single from the collection of songs O’Riordan worked on before she passed. The release has the blessings of her family.
• Santana – will honor both the 50th anniversary of their legendary Woodstock set and the 20th anniversary of their comeback album “Supernatural” by touring North America this summer. The Doobie Brothers will serve as opening act for the tour, which will begin June 22 in Phoenix and wrap up Aug. 25 in Wantagh, NY.
• Mötley Crüe — Nikki Sixx is going to be a dad at age 60. His wife Courtney is pregnant with her first child. Sixx has three children with Playboy Playmate Brandi Brandt, as well as one daughter with actress and Playboy Playmate Donna D’Errico.
• Corey Hart — The Canadian Academy of Recording Arts and Sciences has announced that he will be the 2019 inductee into the Canadian Music Hall of Fame. Hart, who has sold over 16 million albums, will be officially inducted during The JUNO Awards on March 17.
• Dierks Bentley – is developing two very different TV shows. One will center around his ’90s cover band, Hot Country Knights, which he describes as a “Spinal Tap meets Curb Your Enthusiasm type of situation.” The other show is “more of a Cheers of Nashville kind of thing”. It will revolve around a bar in Nashville.
• Jason Aldean — just celebrated his 21st No. 1 single, the Miranda Lambert duet ‘Drowns the Whiskey’, but it was almost a different song entirely. He originally sent her another song for consideration, and he says “Miranda was like, ‘Eh, I just don’t love that song.’” He went back and listened through more of his songs and says that’s when he realized that ‘Drowns the Whiskey’ “is actually the duet.”
TODAY’S MOVIE OPENINGS:
• “Glass” (PG-13, Drama/Mystery): Security guard David Dunn uses his supernatural abilities to track Kevin Wendell Crumb, a disturbed man who has twenty-four personalities. (James McAvoy, Sarah Paulson, Bruce Willis)
• “The Last Man” (R-Rated, Action/Adventure): A combat veteran with PTSD and hallucinations fortifies his home and builds a secret underground shelter due to doomsday-like weather changes. He gets a security job to pay for it and his boss’ cute daughter for company. (Hayden Christensen, Harvey Keitel)
• “I Hate Kids” (PG-13, Comedy): Nick Pearson is a life-long bachelor who is finally settling down. On the brink of his wedding he is surprised to find he has a 13-year-old son. The problem is Nick can’t stand kids, and no one has any clue who the mother is. (Tom Everett Scott, Tituss Burgess)
• “Adult Life Skills” (Not Rated, Comedy): Anna is comfortable living in her mom’s garden shed making funny videos all day, but as she approaches 30, she starts feeling the pressure to move on and “grow up” without compromising her youthful spirit. (Jodie Whittaker, Lorraine Ashbourne)
WORKING FROM HOME:
A survey by Salary.com has determined that stay-at-home Moms deserve to be paid over $160,000 U.S. per year. Researchers found that moms who stay at home handle multiple roles in the household, including education, executive housekeeper, facilities director, interior designer, tax accountant and staff nurse. These “hybrid roles” which reflect a day in the life of a Mom would have had an estimated medium annual salary of $162,581 in 2018. That’s up from just under $158,000 in 2017.
(And are YOU going to tell her she doesn’t deserve a raise?)
(She’s worth even more if her kids are like mine!)
(I’m not even going to ask what a daycare worker should be paid…)
-NYPost
TOO STUPID FOR US TO MAKE UP:
➢ Police were called to a Wichita Falls, Texas Walmart after a woman was reported to be drinking wine from a Pringles can and riding an electric cart in the parking lot. Officers responded to a call around 9 a.m. about a suspicious person in the store’s parking lot. The caller indicated that the woman had been riding around the store’s parking lot since 6:30 a.m., drinking wine from the potato chip can.
(…waiting for the store to open so she could drop off her resume…)
-WSBTV
➢ Louise and Tina are Silicon Valley roommates. Their tiny studio apartment goes for $1,500 per month, a great deal in San Jose. Louise and Tina are cats. They belong to university student Victoria Amith. As she was leaving for college, her father was moving as well, and they needed a place to keep the pets. That’s where David Callisch comes in. He was going to use the apartment as an Airbnb rental, but when he learned he could help his daughter’s friend by renting the apartment to the cats, he went for it. Louise and Tina moved in. And Victoria and her dad (who is the one paying the rent) both come by for regular visits. (And to change the litter box).
(And the cats are wondering why their staff has been cut to part-time…)
-Fortune
➢ A Kentucky woman charged with drunken driving told police she did it “to teach her son a lesson.” Sunita Jairam was arrested early Sunday on charges including endangering the welfare of a minor. Her arrest citation says she told police she “drank a bunch of beer” and drove at 150 mph. The son told police he tried to get out of the BMW subcompact several times, but the door was locked. Jairam’s blood alcohol content was twice the legal limit.
(And what exactly was the “lesson” that she was trying to impart?)
-ABC
DID YOU KNOW?
People who show signs of low self-control have been found to be more susceptible to cybercrime, including malware attacks and computer viruses.
-Curiosity
BS CHRONOMETER 01.18.19
TODAY’S CELEBIRTHDAYS . . .
1955 [64] Kevin Costner, Lynwood CA, movie actor (“The Bodyguard”, “Field of Dreams”)/movie director (“Dances With Wolves”)
1962 [57] Alison Arngrim, Queens NY, TV actress (‘Nellie Olson’ on “Little House on the Prairie” 1974-1982)
1969 [50] Dave Bautista, Washington DC, wrestler-actor (“Guardians of the Galaxy” movies/WWE Wrestling Champion)
1969 [50] Jesse L. Martin, Rocky Mount VA, TV actor (“The Flash” since 2014, “Law & Order” 1999-2008)
1971 [48] Jonathan Davis, Bakersfield CA, rock singer-drummer-bagpiper (Korn-‘Word Up!’, feat. Amy Lee: ‘Freak on a Leash’)
1980 [39] Jason Segal, LA CA, TV actor (“How I Met Your Mother” 2005-15)/movie actor (“The Muppets”, “Forgetting Sarah Marshall”)
SATURDAY-
Country singer Dolly Parton (‘9 to 5’) is 73; Chef Paula Deen is 72; TV actress Katy Sagal (“Sons of Anarchy”) is 65; TV actress Drea Matteo (“Shades of Blue”) is 47; TV actress Jodie Sweetin (“Full House”) is 37
SUNDAY-
Filmmaker David Lynch (“Blue Velvet”) is 73; TV talk show host Bill Maher (“Real Time With Bill Maher”) is 63; TV actor Rainn Wilson (‘The Office”) is 53; TV actor Evan Peters (“American Horror Story”) is 32
BS REASONS TO PARTY . . .
• “Gourmet Coffee Day”, honoring the “good stuff” that costs you an arm and a leg. And then the barista spells your name wrong on the cup. (Wandy?)
• “Maintenance Day”, honoring all janitors and building maintenance personnel.
• “Thesaurus Day”, celebrating the birthday of the author of “Roget’s Thesaurus”. Peter Roget was born on this day in 1779 (Quick! What’s another word for thesaurus?)
• “Winnie the Pooh Day”, honoring the birthday of “Winnie-the-Pooh” author AA Milne (1882-1956) in London UK. (Disney says thanks for the profits, dude.)
• “Peking Duck Day”, Peking Duck is made with a specific breed of duck—the Imperial Peking. It is typically roasted in a brick oven, which causes the skin to become crispy. Peking Duck can be eaten with pancakes, spring onions, and either hoisin sauce or sweet bean sauce.
SATURDAY-
• “Popcorn Day”, a day to celebrate the healthy (until you load it with salt & butter) and addictive treat
• “Tin Can Day”, marking the U.S. patent of a process for storing food in tin cans issued to Ezra Daggett & Thomas Kensett in 1825. (***See “Wack Facts”, below***)
• “Edgar Allan Poe Birth Anniversary”, celebrating the 1809 birth of the famed American writer of “The Raven”, who’s also credited as being the inventor of the mystery novel.
• “Brew a Potion Day”, time for you to brew a potion for all your near and dear ones to make their day bewitched with fun.”
SUNDAY-
• “Cheese Lovers Day”, celebrating the more than 900 known cheeses of the world. Which is best? Mmm, 18-month old Comté from France.
NET: http://tinyurl.com/jsnxhp7
• “Camcorder Day”, a tribute to videography of all varieties. Perhaps you’re a professional and enjoy shooting wildlife (with a lens, not a gun), or an extreme sports fan who attaches a GoPro to your helmet before jumping out of a plane.
• “International Day of Acceptance”, a day dedicated to the social acceptance of disability and to honor the late Annie Hopkins, founder of 3E Love and creator of the International Symbol of Acceptance.
THIS DAY IN SHOW BIZ . . .
2012 [07] SOPA (Stop Online Piracy Act) and PIPA (Protect IP Act) are opposed online with a 1-day blackout by Wikipedia and more than 100,000 other websites
TODAY’S MUSIC EVENTS . . .
2004 [15] Jennifer Lopez’s divorce from her 2nd husband Cris Judd becomes final (his estimated settlement for a year of marriage … $15 million)
2011 [08] World’s largest collection of Beatles memorabilia goes on display in a new museum in Buenos Aires, Argentina (over 8,500 objects)
2016 [03] Glenn Frey, Eagles co-founder, singer-songwriter, and guitarist, dies of pneumonia in NYC at age 67
TODAY’S FIRSTS . . .
2005 [14] The Airbus A380, ‘World’s Largest Commercial Jet’ (800 passengers), is unveiled at a ceremony in Toulouse, France
2013 [06] NASA scientists achieve a first in laser communication when they successfully beam a picture of Leonardo da Vinci’s ‘Mona Lisa’ to the Lunar Reconnaissance Orbiter, a spacecraft orbiting the Moon
TODAY’S RECORDS . . .
2014 [05] 16-year-old Lewis Clarke of Bristol, U.K. becomes the youngest to trek to the South Pole
2015 [04] Over 6 million people attend a mass given by Pope Francis in Manila, Philippines
BULL’S BITS
BS WACK FACTS:
✓ The microwave oven was invented after a researcher walked by a radar tube and a chocolate bar melted in his pocket.
✓ Velcro was invented by a man who was inspired by the way burrs attached to clothing while walking his dog.
✓ The can opener was invented 48 years after the can.
✓The cigarette lighter was invented before the match.
✓ Stilts were invented by French shepherds who needed a way to get around in wet marshes.
✓ The electric chair was invented by a dentist.
-DidYouKnow
BS THINGS NEVER SEEN ON TV:
• A person saying “Goodbye” at the end of a phone call.
• A reality show about the cameramen who film reality shows.
• An actual star on “Dancing With the Stars”.
• A commercial for a wonder-drug whose side-effects don’t sound horrifying.
• Actual directions on how to get to Sesame Street.
• Characters staring at their phones for hours on end.
• A commercial that says it ISN’T the best time to buy a car.
• A functional family.
• How am I supposed to know what I HAVEN’T seen?
• Full frontal nudity. (Although I do keep offering…)
-Twitter
Best of BS . . .
BS WAYS TO GET OUT OF JURY DUTY:
• Make the ‘Law & Order “chung-chung” sound every time someone finishes a sentence.
• Ask if the defendant is married because you’re single and ready to mingle!
• Tell the judge his wife says “Hi”.
• Bring in a magic 8-ball to help everyone with their decision.
• Tell them you’re pro-death-penalty. In all cases, especially divorces.
• Admit that you did it.
• Lose the silent but keep the deadly.
• Shout “Guilty!” when the judge walks in.
• Tell then you’re a ‘stable genius’.
• If all else fails, pull out a flask.
-Twitter, first published in ‘BS’ in 2018
BS RANDOM JOKE:
I fell in love at first sight. I should have looked twice.
BS PHONE STARTER:
What was the worst trouble you got into as a kid?
BS WATER COOLER QUESTION:
Question: 11% of people say they are really looking forward to doing THIS over the weekend. What?
Answer: Laundry
BS DEEP THOUGHT:
Let your smile change the world, but don’t let the world change your smile.
