BS SHOW BIZ BUZZ:
★ Today former “Playboy” playmate Kristina Shannon is due in California count, charged with DUI in relation to a car accident last October. The 26-year-old model and her twin sister Karissa, who both briefly ‘dated’ “Playboy” boss Hugh Hefner in 2008, had to be cut out of their Mercedes-Benz SUV by emergency services after the crash in Beverly Hills. They were hospitalized, but managed to escape with minor injuries. Police subsequently have cited Kristina with a charge of misdemeanor DUI.
– TMZ.com
★ As her custody battle with ex-husband Guy Ritchie continues, Madonna has taken to Instagram to defend her parenting skills, claiming: “It is possible to be a good entertainer and a good mother.” The 57-year-old singer and 47-year-old movie director are reportedly gearing up to go to court over custody of their 15-year-old son Rocco, who has refused to return to the US since December. Madonna is also mother to Lourdes (19), and adopted children David Banda (10) and Mercy (9).
– ContactMusic.com
★ And after nearly 3 months in hospital, Lamar Odom is taking his next steps on the road to recovery. It’s been confirmed he’s left LA’s Cedars-Sinai Hospital and is now continuing his recovery in a private rehabilitation facility. The estranged husband of Khloe Kardashian had been in hospital since being found unconscious in a Nevada brothel last October. A report suggests Kardashian secretly had Odom moved into the rehab facility near her home, in order to avoid any unwanted attention.
– “Us Weekly”

TODAY’S SHOW BIZ SKED:
• “Ellen DeGeneres Show” (syndicated/CTV2) – Kygo (f/Parson James-“Stole the Show”).
• “Jimmy Kimmel Live” (ABC/CityTV) – Leon Bridges (“Coming Home”).
• “Late Late Show With James Corden” (CBS/M3) – Rachel Platten (“Wildfire”).
• “Late Show With Stephen Colbert” (CBS/Global) – James Bay (“Chaos & The Calm”).
• “State Of the Union 2016” (ABC/CBS/FOX/NBC/PBS) – Barack Obama’s speech outlining the current condition of America preempts regular programming for an hour-and-a-half.
• “Tavis Smiley” (PBS) – Talib Kweli (“Train of Thought”).

BS MUSIC NOTES:
• Adele – She continues to break records with her album “25”. It’s now the 1st release by a female artist to spend the 7 weeks after its debut atop the ‘Billboard 200’ since 1987, when Whitney Houston’s 2nd album, “Whitney”, topped the album chart for 11 straight weeks.
• Britney Spears – The British Navy uses her recordings to scare off Somali pirates.
• Cyndi Lauper – She has recruited one of her personal music icons, Willie Nelson, to collaborate with her on a new country-focused album. She’s set up shop in Nashville TN to record her upcoming 11th studio album, “Detour”, which will highlight classic country songs of the 1950s and ’60s.
• David Bowie – Fans continue to pay their respects by leaving floral tributes on London’s Heddon Street, the location of the iconic photo on the cover of “The Rise & Fall of Ziggy Stardust”. It was announced yesterday that Bowie died of cancer on Sunday at age 69. His ex-wife Angie Bowie is currently a contestant on the UK version of “Big Brother” and was told about his death off-camera after the rest of the world found out. She’s opted to remain on the reality show.
• Eminem – He finished writing and recording 2000’s “The Real Slim Shady” just 3 hours before the album was due.

THIS WEEK’S VIDEO RELEASES:
Out today on DVD, Netflix, Google Play and/or other video providers …
• “Hotel Transylvania 2” ( PG Animated Family ): In this sequel to the 2012 animated hit, everything seems to be changing for the better at the hotel, until ‘Drac’ becomes worried that his half-vampire grandson isn’t showing signs of being a true vamp. Voices of Adam Sandler, Selena Gomez, Andy Samberg, Kevin James, David Spade, Steve Buscemi.
• “Irrational Man” ( R-Rated Mystery Drama ): In Woody Allen’s latest, a tormented philosophy professor finds the will to live when he commits an existential act. Stars Joaquin Phoenix, Emma Stone (who also appeared in Allen’s “Magic In the Moonlight” last year), and Parker Posey.
• “The Martian” ( PG-13 Sci-Fi Adventure ): After a Mars mission goes awry, a stranded astronaut (Matt Damon) must fend for himself and find a way to signal to Earth that he is alive. Co-stars Jessica Chastain, Kristen Wiig. Directed by Ridley Scott. Golden Globe winner for ‘Best Musical or Comedy’ (?!?).
• “Sinister 2” ( R-Rated Horror ): A young mother and her twin sons move into a rural house that’s marked for death. With a spooky basement, home movies on film reels, and scary kids in cornfields, this sequel to the 2012 thriller is packed with horror movie tropes. Stars James Ransone, Shannyn Sossamon, and acting brothers Dartanian & Robert Daniel Sloan.
• Also released today: “Duck Dynasty Wedding Special” (Reality TV); “Power Rangers Dino Charge: Unleashed” (Kids).

THE TOILET YOU ONLY CLEAN ONCE A YEAR:
Bathroom firm Toto has unveiled a ‘smart’ toilet that opens when you approach it and self-cleans with every flush. Its self-cleaning process uses a combination of a disinfectant and a glaze which coats the bowl. Meanwhile an ultraviolet light in the lid charges the surface, so nothing can stick. The maker promises you don’t have to clean the toilet bowl for over a year. The latest Neorest commode also cleans the user with an ‘aerated wand’, which delivers warm water and warm air ‘from a seated position’. Despite a $9,800 price tag, more than 40 million earlier versions of the toilets have been sold. (Yeah, but is it digital?)
– BBC Tech

I BEEN HEARTBROKE:
Researchers now believe that so-called ‘Broken-Heart Syndrome’ is the real deal, pointing out that it mimics an actual heart attack. The syndrome affects mostly post-menopausal women, and seems to affect the part of the nervous system that helps calm the body. NYU Medical Center researchers say symptoms compare to the severe emotional stress caused by the death of a loved one or other upsetting news. Based on the findings, they hope to develop prevention strategies such as yoga, meditation, and breathing exercises. Also called takotsubo cardiomyopathy, ‘Broken-Heart Syndrome’ was first identified in Japan 25 years ago. The good news is, if people survive the initial incident, the heart eventually goes back to normal. (But the pain never stops.)
– “Wall Street Journal”

NEW NICHE:
Are Muslim women the next big untapped market? In what “Forbes” magazine calls its smartest move in years, design house Dolce & Gabbana is dipping in to a market with massive potential … Muslim fashion. D&G has launched its first collection of abayas and hijabs for the Middle Eastern luxury goods market. While designed to be modest, the new line is said to have all the flair of any other Dolce & Gabbana collection, with lace embellishments, bright floral details, and vibrant prints. Already, women in wealthy Persian Gulf oil states accessorize their abayas and hijabs with expensive handbags and shoes, and often wear designer labels beneath their modest outer garments. A new Thomson Reuters report projects global spending on clothing and footwear by Muslims to increase to $484 billion by 2019. (Unless the price of oil drops again.)
– FastCoDesign.com

HEADS UP:
Good news! It no longer takes years of hard work to become an astronaut, doctor, or medieval knight. Instead, you can just slap your own head right onto the appropriate Lego person’s body. A new company lets customers replace the typical bright yellow Lego head with an approximation of their own face. For about $30, Funky 3D Faces uses photos of a customers to sculpt their heads out of sandstone material. The resulting head fits onto any standard Lego person body. That means for just $150, you can finally realize your dream of joining the starting lineup of your favorite NBA team. (This is future garage sale stuff for sure.)
– Mashable.com

DO YOU HAVE ‘PHANTOM VIBRATION SYNDROME’?
The sensation that your phone is vibrating in your pocket when it is doing nothing of the sort is not unique. Philosopher and assistant professor at Georgia Institute of Technology, Dr Robert Rosenberger describes the feeling as a ‘hallucination’ caused by anxiety, and says it is quite common. Dr Rosenberger studies the effect technology has on our lives and thinks the phenomenon is a result of always being ‘on-edge’ to answer emails and text messages. (For the good of your health … put the freakin’ phone down!)
– PsychologyToday.com

FOR THE RECORD:
Walter Cavanagh of Santa Clara, California already holds the Guinness Book of World Records title of ‘Mr Plastic Fantastic’ for owning the most credit cards in his name. Now newly revised figures suggest his mark may be unbeatable. Cavanagh now has 1,497 valid credit cards, adding up to $1.7 million in available credit. The wild stats don’t end there: His custom wallet, the world’s longest, stretches 250 feet, weighs 38 pounds, but can hold only 800 of his many cards … not that he carries them around. All but one are kept in a safe-deposit box. (And unlike you … he pays the balance on that one every month.)
– “Money”

BS AMAZING FACT:
Facebook has discovered that just 5% of its accounts make up 85% of users of the ‘hide post’ function, and a small proportion of these are ‘superhiders’, hiding nearly everything they see.
– Slate.com

BS CHRONOMETER 01.12.16

TODAY’S CELEBIRTHDAYS . . .
1964 [52] Jeff Bezos, Albuquerque NM, Internet billionaire (Amazon.com founder & CEO)/estimated net worth: $59.2 billion (2016)

1965 [51] Rob Zombie (Cummings), Haverhill MA, movie director (“Halloween” films, “The Devil’s Rejects”)/metal rocker (“Hellbilly Deluxe 2”, “Educated Horses”)

1970 [46] Zack de la Rocha, Long Beach CA, rock singer (Rage Against the Machine-“Killing In the Name”, “Guerrilla Radio”)

1993 [23] Zayn Malik, Bradford UK, pop singer (ex-One Direction)/former “The X Factor” contestant (2010)/boyfriend of fashion model Gigi Hadid

1996 [20] Ella Henderson, Tetney UK, pop singer (“Glow”, “Ghost”)/former “The X Factor” contestant (2012)

TODAY’S BS REASONS TO PARTY . . .
• “Eat Crackers & Try to Whistle Day”, just to see if it’s still as much fun as it was when you were a kid. (This calls for an on-air experiment!)

• “International Kiss a Ginger Day”, an annual event that encourages folks to pucker up and pant one on a redhead.
10 FAMOUS GINGERS (AND A MAYBE):
✓ Actress Amy Adams (“American Hustle”).
✓ TV personality Conan O’Brien (“Conan”).
✓ TV actor Damien Lewis (“Homeland”, “Billions”).
✓ Movie star Emma Stone (“Birdman”).
✓ Movie actress Jessica Chastain (“Interstellar”).
✓ Actress Julianne Moore (“The Hunger Games: Mockingjay”).
✓ Movie star Nicole Kidman (originally, at least).
✓ Brit royal Prince Harry.
✓ Pop star Ed Sheeran (“x”).
✓ Willie Nelson (well, at a younger age).
And maybe Donald Trump (or is that just a squirrel squatting on his head?)

• “Pharmacists Day”, honoring drug dealers everywhere.

• “Roller Skating Day”, celebrating the pastime that previously employed 4 wheels for what we now do with 2 wheels.

THIS DAY IN SHOW BIZ . . .
2002 [14] Late-night TV host Conan O’Brien weds Liza Powell, a Seattle WA ad executive he met when she made an appearance on his show

2004 [12] Satirical TV newsmagazine “Rick Mercer Report” debuts on CBC-TV

2014 [02] At the 71st Golden Globe Awards, ‘Best Motion Picture Drama’ is awarded to “12 Years a Slave”; ‘American Hustle is receives ‘Best Motion Picture Musical or Comedy’

TODAY’S MUSIC EVENTS . . .
2000 [16] Sharon Osbourne (Ozzy Osbourne’s wife) announces she’s quitting as manager of Smashing Pumpkins due to medical reasons, quote: “Billy Corgan is making me sick!”

2005 [11] It’s announced that the Strawberry Field Children’s Home immortalized by The Beatles is closing (made famous when John Lennon wrote “Strawberry Fields Forever” after playing there as a child)

TODAY’S FIRST . . .
1980 [36] 1st-ever rap recording, “Rapper’s Delight” by Sugarhill Gang, peaks at #36 on pop singles chart

TODAY’S RECORD . . .
2010 [06] The Haiti earthquake occurs, killing an estimated 316,000 and destroying the majority of the capital city Port-au-Prince

AND REMEMBER . . .
[Wed] Make Your Dream Come True Day
[Thurs] International Kite Day
[Thurs] Organize Your Home Day
[Fri] “Gershwin Prize for Popular Song” (PBS)
[Fri] “Hell’s Kitchen” Season 15 premiere (FOX)
This Week Is … Soccer Coaches Week
This Month Is … Be Kind to Food Servers Month

BULL’S BITS

THE 3 STAGES OF MARITAL SEX:
1. Honeymoon Sex: This is where you have sex 3 or 4 times a night.
2. Vacation Sex: This is where you have sex 10 or 12 times a year.
3. Oral Sex: This is where you stand on the opposite side of the bedroom and yell “Screw you!”.

BS RANDOM JOKE:
Never trust a man who says he’s the boss at home. He probably lies about other things too.

BS U-PICK TRIVIA:
• What is the collective noun for larks?
a. An ‘exaltation’ of larks. [CORRECT]
b. A ‘lyric’ of larks.
c. A ‘whole mess’ of larks.

• How many players are on a cricket team?
a. 6
b. 11 [CORRECT]
c. 35
– “Trivia Quest Magazine”

COMEDY SPLITTERS:
Add some mirth in the morning by dropping 10-15 second clips from comedy albums in between spots or out of sets, followed by a station ID. No need to set ’em up, just slip them in to catch listeners off-guard. Look for topical material and be sure to use fresh clips each day.

BS PHONE STARTER:
☎ What special tricks do you use to stay focused?

BS WATER COOLER QUESTION:
Question: 1-in-10 of us say THIS is the first person we’d call if we won the lotto.
Answer: A lawyer.

BS DEEP THOUGHT:
Antique is just another word for second-hand.