Tuesday, January 22, 2013        Edition: #4909

You’ve Got Yourself in Deep Sheet!

Producer JJ Abrams is already planning a Lance Armstrong movie, securing the rights to “NY Times” sportswriter Juliet Macur’s upcoming book “Cycle of Lies: The Fall of Lance Armstrong” (the guy’s such a disappointment, will anyone really want to watch this?) . . . Michael Jackson’s dermatologist, Dr Arnie Klein, has vaguely implied that he’s the father of Prince Jackson by posting Prince’s drivers license photo next to a similar looking pic of himself as a teen with the caption: ‘hmmmmm’ (certainly looks more similar than Michael’s face after the doc was finished with it) . . . Speaking of biological baby-daddies, Mel Gibson is at the center of speculation that he may be the father of actress Jodie Foster’s sons (they don’t look anything like his infamous DUI photo) . . . Sometime actress Katie Holmes is becoming the spokesperson and co-owner of haircare company Alterna (thanks to Tom Cruise money) . . . After making 3 films back-to-back,  38-year-old Leonardo DiCaprio says he’s ‘worn out’ and taking a ‘long, long break’ from acting and will ‘fly around-the-world doing good for the environment’ (wouldn’t NOT flying be better for the environment?) . . . And 31-year-old Brit actor Tom Hiddleston (“The Avengers”, “War Horse”) has been named ‘Sexiest Actor Alive’ in a new “Total Film” magazine poll, ahead of Robert Pattinson, and Ryan Gosling (seems silver screen-sized foreheads are in this year).

• “George Stroumboulopoulos Tonight” (CBC) – Country music legend Dolly Parton (new book “Dream More”).
• “Jimmy Kimmel Live” (ABC/CityTV) – LeAnn Rimes (“Spitfire”, out April 9th).
• “Last Call With Carson Daly” (NBC) – Atlkas Genius (“Through the Glass”); Citizen Cope (“One Lovely Day”); Wolf Gang (“Suego Faults”). Rerun.
• “Late Night With Jimmy Fallon” (NBC/CTV2) – Grace Potter (“The Lion The Beast The Beat”). Rerun.
• “The Talk” (CBS) – Miranda Lambert (“Four the Record”).
• “The Taste” (ABC) – Debut of a new series in which professional and amateur chefs compete in blind taste-tests. Hosted by celeb chefs Anthony Bourdain & Nigella Lawson.
• “Tonight Show With Jay Leno” (NBC/CTV2) –  Ben Harper w/Charlie Musselwhite (“Get Up!”).
• “The View” (ABC/CTV) – New Kids On the Block (“NKOTBSB”).

• Alicia Keys – The NFL has announced that she’ll sing the anthem before the Super Bowl on February 3rd in New Orleans LA.
• Beach Boys – Actor Paul Dano (“There Will Be Blood”) will portray Brian Wilson in the upcoming bio-pic “Love & Mercy”. The script focuses on Wilson’s fight with mental illness and his relationship with his wife, according to “Hollywood Reporter”.
• Beyoncé – Queen B is on the cover of the February issue of “GQ” magazine, which hits newsstands today.
• Ed Sheeran – The Brit singer-songwriter says he plans to work on his next album while he’s on tour with Taylor Swift later this year. He plans to write and record throughout the tour, with the hope of releasing the new set in February 2014.
• “Grammy Nominees Compilation” – Today’s 22-song 2013 release includes The Black Keys’ “Lonely Boy”, Taylor Swift’s “We Are Never Ever Getting Back Together”, Gotye’s “Somebody That I Used To Know”, fun.’s “We Are Young”, and Carly Rae Jepsen’s “Call Me Maybe”, amongst other Grammy-nominated songs from the past year.
• Metallica – Their 3-D movie project “Metallica Through the Never”, filmed over 3 nights of live shows in Vancouver in August 2012, will be coming to movie theaters on August 9th.
• Paul McCartney – He’s recorded the new song “Heart Of the Country” to accompany a new TV ad for late wife Linda McCartney’s vegetarian food line. The commercial, which begins airing later this month in the UK, also features an animated version of Linda, who died in 1998.

• “End of Watch” ( R-Rated Crime Drama ): Two young police officers are marked for death after confiscating a small cache of money and firearms from the members of a notorious cartel during a routine traffic stop. Stars Jake Gyllenhaal, Michael Pena, Anna Kendrick.
• “For a Good Time, Call …” ( R-Rated Comedy ): Two former college frenemies move into a fabulous Manhattan apartment and end up having to start up a phone-sex line in order to make ends meet. Stars Ari Graynor, Lauren Miller, Justin Long.
• “The Paperboy” ( R-Rated Crime Thriller ): Nicole Kidman plays the role of death-row groupie ‘Charlotte Bless’, a woman who writes letters to men who are about to die for their alleged crimes. The cast includes Matthew McConaughey and Zac Efron.
• “Road to Red Rocks” ( NR Concert ): Mumford & Sons’ new tour documentary comes from their “Gentleman Of the Road” tour which ended at Colorado’s famed Red Rocks Ampitheater. The group previously revealed footage from that performance in their video for “I Will Wait”.
• Also released today: “Finding Bigfoot” (Reality TV); “The Men Who Built America” (Documentary); “Method To the Madness of Jerry Lewis” (Documentary); “Scarecrow & Mrs. King: The Complete 4th Season” (Vintage TV); and “Searching for Sugar Man” (Documentary).

New research from the University of Messina’s Faculty of Veterinary Medicine finds that cats really do become part of our families, to the point that they take on human habits – good and bad – and adapt to the lifestyle of their owners. The study underlines the influence of human presence and care on the activity and daily rhythm of cats. For instance, their food intake is associated with that of owners, perhaps explaining why human and cat obesity rates so often seem to match. Humans even serve as role models for their cats, and researchers say we need to encourage that their activities include proper play/prey techniques. (“OK Fluffy, today I’ll be the mousey …”)
– NBCNews.com

Satellites that reach the end of their useful lives are often boosted into a ‘graveyard’ orbit in order to make way for replacements. Now, DARPA (the Pentagon research projects agency) has proposed a grave-robbing robot that could stitch together parts from these dead satellites to create new ones, thereby avoiding the huge expense of launching new components into space. The ‘Phoenix’ program aims to use robot systems to allow Earth-based operators to disassemble satellites and reuse expensive parts such as antennas. (Coming soon: Frankenstein in orbit.)
– NewScientist.com

✓ “Big Cheese” – “He’s the cheese” was at first a compliment meaning ‘first rate’ (ah, so British), but it soon became negative – when ‘big’ began to describe a person of ‘more than common importance’.
✓ “Bone to Pick” – Apparently the phrase, which often refers to someone who is upset, dates back to the 16th century. It means that you’re in for a lengthy discussion or argument, much like someone (a dog, perhaps?) who is insistently chewing on a large bone.
✓ “Cold Turkey” – Some think this expression for giving up an addiction suddenly has do with comparing ‘cold turkey’ to the addict himself (you know, all pale with cold sweats and goose bumps). Others think it’s come to mean ‘without preparation’, like the leftover dish.
✓ “Good Egg” – There’s no real recorded history of how this expression came about but since good eggs far outnumber bad, perhaps what it means is ‘nothing out of the ordinary’, along the same lines as “He’s a nice fellow.”
✓ “With a Grain of Salt” – Apparently the phrase dates back to Pliny the Elder (23-79 AD) and was used in the text, “Naturalis Historia”, which advised you could protect yourself against poison and injurious effects by taking ‘a grain of salt every day’.
– Excerpted from “Village Voice”

They are known as great mimics, but now scientists have discovered that parrots also have varied musical tastes … and an intense dislike of dance tunes. Researchers who monitored the listening preferences of a pair of African grey parrots found that while one favored soothing ‘middle of the road’ music, the other opted for more upbeat, modern pop. Both birds also enjoyed rock and folk music and ‘danced’ along by bobbing their heads and legs. They even ‘sang along’ by squawking. But neither animal appreciated electronic dance music, which left them both distressed. (Least popular pet name for a parrot … Skrillex.)
– Telegraph.co.uk

The use of profanity has exploded in movies, videogames, TV and, of course, online. Now a new study suggests profanity in the media may increase aggression levels among teens. According to researchers at Brigham Young University, it seems to act as a kind of stepping stone to violence. Specifically, the statistical modeling points to a chain reaction: Exposure to profanity is associated with acceptance and use of profanity, which in turn influence both physical and relational aggression. On the whole it’s a moderate effect, the lead author of the pediatrics study admits, but it seems consistent. (“Mommy, Natalie frickin’ hit me!”)
– PsychCentral.com

• The world’s 100 richest earned enough in 2012 to end global poverty … 4 times over.
– RT.com
• Among the books recently re-categorized as fiction at Manly Library in Sydney, Australia is “Lance Armstrong: World’s Greatest Champion”.
– NYDailyNews.com
• You can make beer out of Sugar Puffs breakfast cereal.
– TheGuardian.co.uk
• The world’s largest McDonald’s, on route I-44 at Vinita, Oklahoma, is actually built over the highway, with entrances on both sides.
– HaLife.com


1949 [64] Steve Perry, Hanford CA, classic rock singer (“Oh Sherry”, Journey-“Open Arms”)

1952 [61] Teddy Gentry, Ft Payne AL, country singer (Alabama-“Reckless”, “Jukebox in My Mind”)/a record 21 consecutive #1 country hits

1965 [48] Diane Lane, NYC, movie actress (“Under the Tuscan Sun”, “Unfaithful”)/Mrs Josh Brolin since 2004

1985 [28] Orianthi (Panagaris), Adelaide, Australia, pop-rock singer-songwriter/guitarist (“According to You”)

1987 [26] Ray Rice, New Rochelle NY, NFL running back (Super Bowl-bound Baltimore Ravens)

• “Answer Your Cat’s Questions Day”, a day to concentrate on your feline and answer the questions you think it’s asking. People often consider cats unaffectionate, not true companions. But the truth is, they only talk to humans. Studies show they rarely ‘meow’ at other cats.

• “Celebration of Life Day”, a day to honor the gift of children and grandchildren.

• “Rid the World of Fad Diets & Gimmicks Day”, the 24th annual as part of “Healthy Weight Week” as declared by the ‘National Council Against Health Fraud’, which debunks unrealistic claims made by weight-loss companies.
NET: http://www.healthyweightnetwork.com/hww.htm

• “St Vincent of Saragossa Day”, honoring the patron saint of wine growers. Tradition says: ‘Sunshine on St Vincent’s Day means the year’s wine will be more plentiful than water’. Let’s drink to that!

• “Speak Up & Succeed Day”, observed annually on the 4th Tuesday of January. Tomorrow is ‘You’re Fired, You Loudmouth Troublemaker Day’.

2008 [05] Australian actor Heath Ledger (Oscar-“The Dark Knight”) dies in NYC of pharmaceutical overdose at age 29  BS FACTOID: His mother, Sally Ledger, tells Australia’s “New Idea” magazine the pain of losing her son is not getting any easier; quote: “It has been an extremely difficult 5 years, as not a day goes by when we don’t feel the immense loss of Heath.”

2010 [03] Conan O’Brien hosts his final “Tonight Show” on NBC-TV

2012 [01] Legendary Penn State football coach Joe Paterno dies at age 85, his legacy tainted by ongoing investigations of sexual assault by his former assistant Jerry Sandusky

1973 [40] In Kingston, Jamaica, 24-year-old George Foreman pulls off a stunning upset, defeating reigning champ Joe Frazier to win the World Heavyweight Boxing Championship

1992 [21] Canada’s 1st female astronaut (and second overall), Roberta Bondar, lifts off in space shuttle ‘Discovery’

1943 [70] Temperature rises by 49 degrees F (30 C) in 2 minutes in Spearfish, South Dakota

1964 [49] World’s ‘Largest Cheese’ (34,590 lbs/15,723 kg) is produced in Wisconsin

2006 [07] LA Lakers superstar Kobe Bryant scores 81 points against the Toronto Raptors at Staples Center, 2nd-most points in a single NBA game in history behind Wilt Chamberlain’s 100 in 1962

[Wed] Handwriting Day
[Wed] Pie Day
[Thurs] Belly Laugh Day
[Thurs] Beer Can Day
[Thurs] Compliment Day
[Thurs] Peanut Butter Day
[Thurs] Women’s Healthy Weight Day
This Week Is … No Name-Calling Week
This Month Is … Volunteer Blood Donor Month


(Round 2)
• Phosphoria [Florida]
• Pica [Ailment]
• Jaundice [Ailment]
• Osceola [Florida]
• Impetigo [Ailment]
• Dysthymia [Ailment]
• Pompano [Florida]
• Coma [Ailment]
• Coxsackie [Ailment]
• Hypoluxo [Florida]
– Thanks to Mike Zuckerman

☎ Are reader ‘comments’ on websites a waste of time and space?

• Which is known as “the poor man’s food” in the Middle East?
a. Figs. [CORRECT]
b. Dates.
c. McDonald’s.
– PA News

• Where does natural vanilla flavoring come from?
a. Roses.
b. Orchids. [CORRECT]
c. Honeysuckle.
– LM Boyd  

If life deals you lemons, make lemonade; if it deals you tomatoes, make Bloody Marys.

Question: 65% of fitness club members say THIS is their biggest pet peeve.
Answer: Guys flexing in the mirror.

Shortcut … the longest distance between two points.

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