Thursday, January 3, 2013        Edition: #4896

Monthly Planning Calendar in Today’s Edition!

BS SUBSCRIBER NOTE:
All “Bull Sheet” subscribers have received account credits for missed service days over the holiday season. Hope you had a good one!

BS SHOW BIZ BUZZ:
Sam Mendes’ critically-acclaimed ‘James Bond’ movie “Skyfall”, which has now taken in more than $1 billion in worldwide box office, also ranks #2 in movie gaffes according to a year-end ranking by MovieMistakes.com, with 35 onscreen goofs (nothing compared to “Men In Black III”, which tops the list with a whopping 63!) . . . Unless it falters substantially in the ratings between now and the end of the season in May, CBS-TV’s “The Big Bang Theory” could turn out to be the most-watched sitcom since “Friends” went off-the-air in 2004, according to Zap2it.com (seems we love those laugh tracks) . . . Justin Bieber has sent condolences to the family of a paparazzo who was run over and killed in traffic while photographing the singer’s Ferrari, which was being driven by a friend when pulled over by cops in Los Angeles (continuously hounded Biebs is likely secretly feeling a sense of justice) . . . Katie Homes’ Broadway play “Dead Accounts” is closing this Sunday – 7 weeks early – due to poor ticket sales (seems her bad acting in “The Kennedys” was no fluke) . . . Actress Kristen Stewart has been photographed carrying a slingshot in her back pocket (which is now likely going to be a thing that people do) . . . Warning! Warning! Gwyneth Paltrow has another cookbook coming out, clumsily entitled “It’s All Good: Delicious, Easy Recipes That Will Make You Look Good and Feel Great by Gwyneth Paltrow and Julia Turshen” (whose name appears in tiny font).

TODAY’S SHOW BIZ SKED:
• “Chelsea Lately” (E!) – Pitbull (“Global Warming”). Rerun.
• “Conan” (TBS/CTV) – Father John Misty (“Fear Fun”). Rerun.
• “Ellen DeGeneres Show” (syndicated/CTV2) – Allen Stone (“Allen Stone”).
• “Jimmy Kimmel Live” (ABC/CityTV) – Atlas Genius (“Through the Glass”). Rerun.
• “Last Call With Carson Daly” (NBC) – The Features (“Wilderness”). Rerun.
• “Late Late Show With Craig Ferguson” (CBS) – The Imagineers (“See As I Say”).
• “Late Night With Jimmy Fallon” (NBC/CTV2) – TI (“Trouble Man: Heavy Is the Head”).
• “Late Show With David Letterman” (CBS/NTV/Omni1) – Everest (“Ownerless”).
• “Tonight Show With Jay Leno” (NBC/CTV2) – Ziggy Marley (“Wild & Free”).

BS MUSIC NOTES:
• Adele – “Someone Like You” has been named Britain’s most popular karaoke song of 2012.
• Florida Georgia Line – This week “Cruise” remains atop the ‘Billboard Country Songs’ chart.
• Green Day – They’ve announced they’ll return to the road in March after having to cancel their Fall tour while frontman Billie Joe Armstrong underwent treatment for substance abuse.
• Jay-Z – He’s reportedly composing the score for Baz Luhrmann’s upcoming film remake of “The Great Gatsby” (opening May 10th) with another artist who goes by the name The Bullitts.
• Kings Of Leon – They performed at a New Year’s bash hosted by Russian billionaire Roman Abramovich aboard his yacht while anchored in St Bart’s. Among the 400 guests: George Lucas, Jake Gyllenhaal, Naomi Watts, Roger Waters, and Sean ‘Diddy Combs.
• PSY – “Gangham Style” has now surpassed 1 billion views on YouTube.
• Rolling Stones – Ronnie Wood says they will carry on performing until they can no longer stand up.
• Susan Boyle – Julie Walters says she’d love to play the singer in a bio-movie. The “Harry Potter” actress has been picked by Boyle as her first choice if a movie gets made.

FROM THE BS POLL VAULT:
A statistical look at who we are and the things we do …
• 90% of people who own a piano say that it’s used for nothing other than collecting dust.
• 75% of women wish their man would hold hands more in public.
• 66% of us have bad-mouthed a previous employer during a job interview even though we know it’s a bad idea.
• 52% of women say that a man with a nice kitchen is ‘much more attractive’.
• 10% of men admit they bought their partner’s Christmas gift at a gas station or convenience store.
• 5% of couples go on vacation during the month of January.

CHEAP STREET:
According to Trulia, an online real estate community, houses on ‘boulevards’ are the most expensive, selling for 36% more than homes located on ‘streets’. The breakdown of average home values by address designations …
• ‘Boulevard’ … $117 per square foot.
• ‘Place’ … $110.
• ‘Road’ … $109.
• ‘Way’ … $107.
• ‘Terrace’ … $102.
• ‘Court’ / ‘Lane’ … $101.
• ‘Circle’ … $100.
• ‘Trail’ … $97.
• ‘Avenue’ / ‘Drive’ … $96.
• ‘Street’ … $86.
– TheGlobeandMail.com

CURE FOR RUBBERNECKING?
Britain’s Highways Agency has bought more than 3,000 screens in an attempt to stop English drivers from rubbernecking while passing by vehicle accidents. The partitions will be put up to deter drivers who slow down to look at crashes on the opposite side of the road, thereby slowing down the traffic behind. Each set has 30 screens which are loaded onto purpose-built trailers and can screen off up to 75 meters (246 ft) if used end-to-end. The individual screens are approximately 2.1 wide meters by 2 meters high or 7 ft X 6-and-a-half. (Isn’t a giant walled-off area beside a highway MORE likely to make you curious?)
– BBC News

BANISHED WORDS:
Michigan’s Lake Superior State University has released its annual ‘List of Words to Be Banished from the Queen’s English for Mis-use, Over-use and General Uselessness’. The 2013 list, compiled from nominations submitted from around-the-world, includes these terms …
• ‘Boneless Wings’ – Can’t we just call them chicken pieces?
• ‘Bucket List’ – A grim way of looking at ‘things I want to do’.
• ‘Double Down’ – Blackjack term now used in place of ‘repeat’ or ‘reaffirm’ or ‘reiterate’.
• ‘Fiscal Cliff’ – Hearing about it over and over and over is far worse than falling over it.
• ‘Guru’ – It’s a silly and pretentious way of bragging about being an expert at something.
• ‘Job Creation’ – It implies supernatural powers like the ability to change weather or levitate.
• ‘Kick the Can Down the Road’ – Dumb expression meaning to delay something until later.
• ‘Passionate’ – As in a celebrity is ‘passionate’ about some issue somewhere. Usually not enough to actually BE there.
• ‘Spoiler Alert’ – Used as an obnoxious way to show that one has trivial information and is about to use it, no matter what.
• ‘Superfood’ – It’s food. It’s either healthful or it’s not. There is no ‘super’ involved.
• ‘Trending’ – A ‘trend’ is something temporary … thank goodness.
NET: http://www.lssu.edu/banished/current.php
– AP

HERE WE GO AGAIN:
Doomsayers disappointed by December 21st’s non-apocalypse will get another shot in 2013 in the form of a rare supercomet. Once widely seen as a portent of doom, comets are seldom as spectacular as the new arrival, known as C/2012 S1 (aka ‘ISON’), may be. At its peak, it may outshine the Moon, even by day. First spotted in September, it’s rushing toward the Sun from the outer solar system. Its closest approach will be in November, when the Minor Planet Center at Harvard University expects it to put on at least as good a show as Hale-Bopp did in 1997. (Beware! The end is near … yet again.)
– NewScientist.com

FOR THE RECORD:
Jiroemon Kimura, a 115-year-old Japanese man born when Queen Victoria still reigned over the British Empire, has became the oldest man in recorded history. Kimura was born April 19, 1897. The oldest woman in recorded history, Frenchwoman Jeanne Calment, died in 1997 at the age of 122.
– BloombergNews.com

DID YOU KNOW?
• Iceland publishes more books per capita than any other country in the world.
– NPR.org
• This month marks 10 years since euro coins and notes first appeared in European’s wallets.
– “The Guardian”

THE BULL SHEET 01.03.13


TODAY’S CELEBIRTHDAYS . . .
1956 [57] Mel Gibson, Peekskill NY, movie producer/director (“Apocalypto”, “The Passion Of the Christ”)/movie actor (“Signs”, “Lethal Weapon” series)

1981 [32] Eli Manning, New Orleans LA, NFL quarterback (2008, 2012 Super Bowl MVP-NY Giants)/brother of Denver Broncos QB Peyton Manning/son of NFL veteran Archie Manning

1985 [28] Mark Pontius, LA CA, indie pop-rock drummer (Foster the People-“Don’t Stop”, “Pumped Up Kicks”)

1986 [27] Nash Overstreet, Nashville TN, pop-rock guitarist-vocalist (Hot Chelle Rae-“Tonight Tonight”)/son of country music singer-songwriter Paul Overstreet/brother of actor Chord Overstreet (“Glee”)

TODAY’S BS REASONS TO PARTY . . .
• “Chocolate Covered Cherry Day”. Just what you need … an excuse to pork on yet another pound!

• “Drinking Straw Day”, celebrating its invention on this date in 1888. Drinking straws were hand-rolled until 1905. How’d kids blow bubbles in their milk before they were invented?

• “Earth at Perihelion” occurs, Earth’s closest approach to the Sun in 2013.

• “Festival of Sleep Day”, a day to sleep in, snooze, doze, nap, and catch 40 winks after the exhausting holidays and re-charge the batteries as a new year of school and work begins.

• “Fruitcake Toss Day”, your opportunity to finally throw away the old fruitcake. After the holidays are over, it’s time to bring in the new, and toss out the old. Today is the day that the fruitcake goes. Make it into a real event … go for distance!

• “JRR Tolkien’s Birthday” (1892-1973), the 121st anniversary of his birth in Bloemfontein, South Africa. The Oxford University professor of English Language & Literature first published “The Hobbit” in 1937, and the “Lord Of the Rings” trilogy in 1954-55 … for which his heirs should now be extremely grateful!

THIS DAY IN SHOW BIZ . . .
2004 [09] Britney Spears weds hometown pal Jason Alexander at the Little White Wedding Chapel in Las Vegas and then, 55 hours later, has the union annulled

TODAY’S MUSIC EVENT . . .
1987 [26] The Rock & Roll Hall of Fame inducts its first female artist, Aretha Franklin

TODAY’S FIRST . . .
2003 [10] NASA rover ‘Spirit’ touches down on Mars.

TODAY’S RECORDS . . .
1992 [21] Bernard Moeller of Pennsylvania gets his 14,000th tattoo, leading to a listing in the “Guinness Book of World Records” as ‘Person With the Most Individual Tattoo Designs’

1993 [20] Buffalo Bills pull off greatest comeback in NFL history as backup quarterback Frank Reich leads them to a 41-38 overtime victory over Houston Oilers in an AFC wild card playoff game after trailing 35-3

BS MONTHLY PLANNING CALENDAR . . .
[Jan 4] Pop Music Chart Day / Trivia Day / World Braille Day / World Hypnotism Day
[Jan 5] Bean Day / Bird Day
[Jan 6] “The Biggest Loser” season debut (NBC) / Epiphany or Twelfth Night / Three Kings Day
[Jan 7] Weigh-In Day / Harlem Globetrotters Day / I’m Not Going to Take It Anymore Day / International Programmers Day / Orthodox Christmas / Tempura Day / Thank God It’s Monday Day
[Jan 8] “Betty White’s Off Their Rockers” season debut (NBC) / Argyle Day / Bubble Bath Day / Earth’s Rotation Day / English Toffee Day / Midwives Day / Show & Tell Day at Work / War on Poverty Day
[Jan 9] “2013 People’s Choice Awards” (CBS) / Static Electricity Day
[Jan 10] Cut Your Energy Costs Day / League of Nations Day
[Jan 11] Lady Gaga’s “Born This Way Ball” North American leg begins (Vancouver) / Learn Your Name in Morse Code Day / Human Trafficking Awareness Day
[Jan 12] “Miss America Pageant” (ABC)
[Jan 13] “Girls” season debut (HBO) / “70th Golden Globe Awards” (NBC) / Rubber Duckie Day / Stephen Foster Day
[Jan 14] Caesarean Section Day / Dress Up Your Pet Day / Clean Off Your Desk Day / Organize Your Home Day
[Jan 15] Humanitarian Day
[Jan 16] “American Idol” 12th season debut (FOX) / Appreciate a Dragon Day / Religious Freedom Day
[Jan 17] Kid Inventors Day / Winnie the Pooh Day / Thesaurus Day / Women in Blue Jeans Day
[Jan 18] “Fringe” 2-hour series finalé (FOX) / International Fetish Day
[Jan 19] Popcorn Day / Tin Can Day
[Jan 20] Camcorder Day / Disc Jockey Day / World Religion Day
[Jan 21] Hugging Day / Fancy Rat & Mouse Day / Martin Luther King Day (USA) / Squirrel Appreciation Day
[Jan 22] Answer Your Cat’s Questions Day / Celebration of Life Day / Rid The World of Fad Diets & Gimmicks Day
[Jan 23] Handwriting Day / Pie Day / Snowplow Mailbox Hockey Day
[Jan 24] Belly Laugh Day / Beer Can Day / Compliment Day / Peanut Butter Day / Talk Like a Grizzled Prospector Day / Women’s Healthy Weight Day
[Jan 25] Fun at Work Day / Mackintosh Computer Day / Preschool Fitness Day / A Room of One’s Own Day
[Jan 26] Peanut Brittle Day / Seed Swap Day / Full ‘Wolf’ Moon
[Jan 27] “Screen Actors Guild Awards” (TBS/TNT) / Holocaust Memorial Day / Thomas Crapper Day / Vietnam Peace Day / World Leprosy Day
[Jan 28] Data Privacy Day / Kazoo Day / Bubble Wrap Appreciation Day / Thank a Plugin Developer Day
[Jan 29] Curmudgeons Day / Freethinkers Day / Puzzle Day / Seeing Eye Dog Day
[Jan 30] Inane Voicemail Message Day
[Jan 31] Inspire Your Heart With Art Day

BULL’S BITS


BS THINGS YOU DON’T WANT TO HEAR WHEN CALLING TECH SUPPORT:
• “Do you have a sledgehammer or brick handy?”
• “Looks like you’re gonna need some new dilythium crystals, Captain.”
• “So … what are you wearing?”
• “We can fix this, but you’ll have to find a butter knife, a roll of duct tape, and a car battery.”
• “Bummer, dude!”
• “Hold on a second … Mommy, Tommy’s hitting me!”

BS PHONE STARTERS:
☎ What should Kanye & Kim name their expected baby? Special K?
☎ Which will you miss more in 2013 … “Twilight” or Twinkies?
☎ At what age difference does marriage between an older man and younger woman become totally tacky? (For newlyweds Hugh Hefner & Crystal Harris, the gap is 60 years.)

BS RANDOM JOKE:
I was once arrested for walking in someone else’s sleep …

BS U-PICK TRIVIA:
• In 1979 what gave actor Mel Gibson an edge when auditioning for the starring role in “Mad Max”?
a. He was dating the producer’s daughter.
b. He’d just won a prestigious Australian acting award.
c. His face had been badly beaten in a fistfight. [CORRECT]

• When first appearing as an extra in the 1992 film “Buffy the Vampire Slayer” which did actor Ben Affleck portray?
a. Surfer.
b. Basketball player. [CORRECT]
c. Vampire.
– Halife.com

BS WATER COOLER QUESTION:
Question: According to a recent survey, men start doing THIS on average at age 35.
Answer: Trimming their ear hair.

BS DEEP THOUGHT:
For every action, there is an equal and opposite criticism.


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