Wednesday, July 12, 2017 – Edition: #6011

Sheet Happens!

BS SHOW BIZ BUZZ:
★ True Blood star Nelsan Ellis’ struggled with alcohol addiction and that could have caused the heart failure that lead to his death, according to his father. A statement released by Ellis’ manager reads: ”Nelsan’s father has bravely agreed for me to share the circumstances of Nelsan’s heart failure. Nelsan has suffered with drug and alcohol abuse for years. After many stints in rehab, Nelsan attempted to withdraw from alcohol on his own. According to his father, during his withdrawal from alcohol he had a blood infection, his kidneys shut down, his liver was swollen, his blood pressure plummeted and his dear sweet heart raced out of control.” Nelsan Ellis died on Saturday at 39.
-ContactMusic
★  Ryan Seacrest has congratulated his ex-girlfriend Julianne Hough after she tied the knot with her fiancé Brooks Laich over the weekend. Speaking as he hosted ‘Live With Kelly and Ryan’, Seacrest said: ”She looked stunning. I know this family, they’re terrific people. [Julianne is] super talented. Congratulations, Julianne.”
(And remember her 2014 quote on her split with Seacrest?  “There was nothing wrong or bad, but there was nothing right”!!)
-People
★ Lindsay Lohan’s younger brother Mike Lohan Jr. was married over the weekend. And his famous sister didn’t make it to the festivities. But her parents did.  Despite their famously fraught relationship — Michael and Dina Lohan both attended the nuptials. Lindsay has been spending a lot of time abroad lately. She recently flew to Greece, where she opened Lohan Nightclub last year and her spokesperson says Lohan missed the wedding to work on a ‘top-secret project’.
-PageSix, DailyMail
★ The ‘young Han Solo’ movie may have hit a rough patch when directors Phil Lord and Chris Miller were replaced by Ron Howard in the middle of production, but Woody Harrelson is confident that the Millennium Falcon is right on course. Harrelson previously starred in Howard’s 1999 comedy EDtv and the as-yet-untitled Han Solo movie marks a reunion between the director and the actor, who’s playing a mysterious mentor to the young smuggler.
(EDtv?  Is that the level that we’re shooting for here?)
-EW
★ James Woods has reached a settlement in his US$10 million defamation lawsuit against a fellow Twitter user. The conservative actor took particular issue with the user’s claim that Woods was a “cocaine addict”, and sued for damages for defamation and invasion of privacy by false light.
-TorontoSun
★ Steve Whitmire has quit as the voice of Kermit the Frog after 27 years. The 57-year-old puppeteer inherited the iconic role in 1990 following the death of Jim Henson – who created the Muppets – but will no longer lend his vocal talents to the high-pitched amphibian. It’s not known why Steve, who has been with the Muppets since 1978, is departing the role.
(Besides the fact that it ain’t easy being green…)
-ContactMusic

TODAY’S SHOW BIZ SKED:
• “Jimmy Kimmel Live” (ABC/Global): Jacob Batalon, the Kills
• “The Tonight Show starring Jimmy Fallon” (NBC/CTV): Amy Poehler, Zendaya, Imagine Dragons ( R )
• “The Late Show with Stephen Colbert” (CBS/Global): John Oliver, Mike Birbiglia, Michael Showalter
• “Late Night with Seth Meyers” (NBC/CTV): Andy Cohen, Patty Jenkins, Rakesh Satyal, Eric Moore ( R )
• “The Late Late Show with James Corden” (CBS/CTV): Anne Hathaway, Armie Hammer, Rob Delaney, 6lack ( R )
• “Last Call with Carson Daly” (NBC/CTV): Jason Silva, the Buttertones, Ghost Brothers ( R )
• “The Daily Show with Trevor Noah” (Comedy): James Davis
• “@Midnight with Chris Hardwick” (Comedy): Penn Jillette, Teller, Arj Barker
• “Conan” (TBS/Comedy): Marisa Tomei, Gabrielle Union, Jackie Kashian
• “Watch What Happens Live” (Bravo): Steve Gold, Sonja Morgan
• “The View” (ABC/CTV): Day of Hot Topics
• “The Talk” (CBS): Alyson Hannigan, Jarett Wieselman, guest co-host Scott Wolf
• “Live with Kelly and Ryan” (ABC/CTV): Judd Apatow, Charlie Wilson
• “The Ellen DeGeneres Show” (NBC/CTV): Adam Sandler, Meghan Trainor ( R )
• “Wendy Williams” (FOX): Billy Ray Cyrus, Jeremiah Bullfrog
• “Harry” (NBC/CTV): Derek Hough, Keith Powers, Chefs JP & Julia, Michelle Buteau ( R )
• “The Real” (FOX): Tiffany Aliche, guest co-host Deon Cole ( R )
• “The 25th ESPYS” (ABC): Celebrating the best moments of the year in sports, from the Microsoft Theater in Los Angeles. Hosted by Peyton Manning.
• “Big Brother” (CBS): House guests vie for the power of veto.

BS MUSIC NOTES:
• Rolling Stones – Their back catalogue is set to be transformed into a jukebox musical. The iconic band are said to have inspired theatre producers in London’s West End, who are apparently holding secret workshops to audition castmembers for a potential stage show.
• Eagles – former guitarist Don Felder recalls the moment when he realized the universal appeal of “Hotel California,” the iconic hit song he co-wrote. Felder says of a 2013 show at the UN in New York:  “I’m playing for this audience, and I hope they could understand the lyrics and the song. So when I get to “Hotel California,” everybody in the crowd is singing along, they knew every lyric to this song: ‘Wow, guys in parts of the world who don’t even speak English know this song.”
• Rhianna – will appear as a burlesque dancer in the sc-fi movie ‘Valerian and the City of a Thousand Planets’.  The movie opens on July 21.
• Lorde – the New Zealand pop star plans to celebrate her 21st birthday in a way that honors her prideful nation. She says she’s gonna drink a yard-sized glass full of beer.
• Prince – his videos have finally hit YouTube.  Many classic hits plus live performances are now on the site.  Prince was never a fan of his videos being on YouTube, and went so far as to have fan videos of live shows taken down.
• Gwen Stefani – is being sued for supposedly creating a dangerous stampede at one of her concerts when she invited fans to rush the stage.  Lisa Stricklin claims Stefani invited lawn seat fans to come forward into a reserved seated area at the concert last July. In the court docs, Stricklin says Stefani shouted … “Just fill in anywhere you like! Who cares about your lawn chairs? You can get new ones!” … which allegedly prompted a ton of people to stampede into the seated area, injuring Stricklin.  (I’m guessing this girl is not a regular in the mosh-pit??)
• Niall Horan – has announced his first solo tour.  The One Directioner’s ‘Flicker Sessions 2017′ tour begins Aug. 29 in Dublin, Ireland. Horan will promote music from his forthcoming debut solo album on the tour.
• Tim McGraw – has been caught on video backstage singing the Glen Campbell’s classic hit ‘Rhinestone Cowboy’ alongside Charlie Worsham.  Worsham plays guitar, while McGraw starts off the song with Worsham singing the final verse.  McGraw has Tweeted the video.
• Old Dominion – have revealed the tracklisting details for their forthcoming sophomore album, “Happy Endings” which will hit stores on August 25th.  There are 12 songs in total, including the already released ‘Written in the Sand’ and ‘No Such Thing as a Broken Heart’.

GREAT.  NOW EVEN MY DESK IS SMARTER THAN ME:
If you think that your boss keeps a pretty close eye on what you are doing NOW, wait until you hear about what might be coming next.  The Artificially Intelligent Desk will allow your company to pretty much monitor all your activity from the time you show up in the morning until you duck out early at 3:30.  But all the things it can do aren’t necessarily bad. The A.I.D. is a fancy sit-or-stand desk that is outfitted with sensors which learn your habits and preferences and can send out a gentle vibration to tell you that you have been sitting too long. Or that it is lunchtime.  It monitors your keystrokes to give you advice on ergonomics and productivity.  And yes, it allows your boss to really keep an eye on what you are doing.  Or not doing.  How much does it cost?  About $10,000.  And although for most workers, the first question is “Am I going to get fired?”, the manufacturers insist that the purpose of the A.I. Desk is to maximize employees’ effectiveness and to determine the best use of space and office furniture.
(Translation: Yup. You’re going to get fired.)
(OK, but when the RESTROOM tells me that I’ve been sitting too long, that’s it, I quit!)
(Ummm, does that mean they are tracking my internet use too?)
-Bloomberg

SPIDER-FACTS:
With ‘Spider-Man: Homecoming’ swinging to the top of the box-office with a $117 million opening weekend, the best Spidey debut since 2007’s ‘Spider-Man 3′, here are some fun Spider-Facts:
▪ Spider-Man, created by Stan Lee and Steve Ditko, first appeared in August 1962 in ‘Amazing Fantasy #15′
▪ Spider-Man wasn’t originally going to be a spider.  Lee wanted to base a comic on a fly or another insect, but decided on a spider.
▪ The hyphen was placed between ‘spider’ and ‘man’ to avoid confusion with Superman.
▪ Spider-Man’s web dissolves within an hour and yet is strong enough to hold The Hulk.
▪ His weakness is pesticide ethyl chloride.
▪ Former U.S. President Obama’s favourite superhero is Spider-Man.
▪ Spider-Man joined the Fantastic Four when the Human Torch died.
▪ Peter Parker wasn’t the only hero in the family.  His parents were spies and died in a plane crash.  That’s why Peter lived with his Aunt May and Uncle Ben.
▪ Spider-Man’s numerous real jobs included high-school science teacher, scientist and business owner (and of course, photographer).
▪ Spider-Man sewed a sensor into his costume that set his camera off when he passed.  This was how Peter captured those wonderful Spider-Man action shots.
▪ At one point, Spidey actually had 6 arms and even became a giant spider.
▪ His girlfriends have included Betty Brant, Liz Allen, Gwen Stacy, Mary Jane Watson and the Black Cat.
▪ Spider-Man has died numerous times in the story-lines ‘The Other’ and ‘Superior Spider-Man’.
(Now tell us how he can have such a great sense of humor while someone beats the tarnation out of him!)
-TheFactSite

DOUBLE-DIPPING:
You know when you see an interview with a lottery winner on TV and sometimes they say that they will keep on buying tickets?  Well, that paid off for 19 year-old Rosa Dominguez of California.  She hit it big with two winning scratch tickets in a week!  First, she bought a $5 Power 5 ticket and won the top prize of $555,555.  A few days later she picked up a Lucky Fortune ticket and scored an additional $100,000!  She plans to buy a new car…and go shopping.
(Probably shopping for more lottery tickets!)
(And it makes my day when I win a free ticket!)
(She’d better watch out for Lightning!)
(Some people just don’t know when to quit…)
-CNN

BS CHRONOMETER 07.12.17

TODAY’S CELEBIRTHDAYS . . .
1937 [80] Bill Cosby, Philadelphia PA, embattled comedian/actor who will be retried on sexual assault charges in November.

1948 [69] Richard Simmons, Entrepreneur, New Orleans, LA (fitness guru who dedicated his business ventures to helping people lose weight, primarily through his “Sweatin’ to the Oldies” videos.)

1951 [66] Cheryl Ladd, TV Actress, Juron, SD (‘Kris Munroe’ on “Charlie’s Angels” 1977-1981)

1962 [55] Dan Murphy, Minneapolis MN, alt-rock guitarist (Soul Asylum-”Misery”, “Runaway Train”)

1978 [39] Topher Grace, NYC, movie actor (“American Ultra”, “Interstellar”)/TV actor (“Too Big to Fail” 2011, ‘Eric Foreman’ on “That ’70s Show” 1998-2005)

1978 [39] Michelle Rodriguez, San Antonio TX, movie actress (“Fast & Furious” films, “Avatar”)/TV actress (“Lost” 2005-06, 2009-10)

1980 [37] Kristen Connolly, Montclair NJ, TV actress (“Zoo” since 2015, “House of Cards” 2013-14)

1983 [34] Kimberly Perry, Ridgeland MS, country singer-guitarist (The Band Perry-“Better Dig Two”, “If I Die Young”)

1988 [29] Ta’Rhonda Jones, Chicago IL, TV actress (‘Porsha Taylor’ on “Empire” since 2015)

1990 [27] Rachel Brosnahan, Milwaukee WI, TV actress (‘Abby Isaacs’ on “Manhattan” 2014-15, ‘Rachel Posner’ on “House of Cards” 2013-15)

TODAY’S BS REASONS TO PARTY . . .
• “Different Colored Eyes Day”, celebrating the diversity of eye color as well as people with eyes that are a different color from one other. Celebs with what’s called ‘heterochromia’ include late rocker David Bowie, actress Mila Kunis, and actor Kiefer Sutherland.

• “Pecan Pie Day”, celebrating one of the most decadent of all desserts. The crust and pecans aren’t necessary … just the yummy goo in the center! Is it ‘PEE-can or ‘puh-CAHN’?  Or is it ‘pee-CAHN’?

• “Simplicity Day”, a day to focus on ways to simplify your life. Which would be …?

• “Eat Your Jello Day”, coincidence that it’s also Bill Cosby’s birthday??

• “Paper Bag Day”,  the paper bag has become a household staple. Uses include bringing your groceries home, carrying your lunch, curing your hiccups and making puppets.  (And carrying a bottle?)

THIS DAY IN SHOW BIZ . . .
2008 [09] Twins (a girl named Vivienne Marcheline & a boy named Knox Leon) are born to acting couple Brad Pitt & Angelina Jolie in Nice, France

TODAY’S MUSIC EVENT . . .
2008 [09] Rolling Stones guitarist Ronnie Wood leaves his wife of 23 years and moves in with an 18-year-old Russian cocktail waitress (the 61 year-old dad-of-four met the teenager while out drinking and whisked her away to his luxury pad in Ireland) Then they got married.  Then got divorced.  Then he married Sally Humphries who was 34.  They have one year-old twins together.

TODAY’S FIRST . . .
1998 [19] Host country France defeats favored Brazil 3-0 to win its 1st-ever FIFA World Cup, at Stade de France in Saint Denis

TODAY’S RECORD . . .
1996 [21] Michael Jordan signs with Chicago Bulls for an NBA-record $30 million-a-season

2015 [02] Novak Djokovic achieves his 3rd Wimbledon title, denying Roger Federer the all-time record of 8 Wimbledon titles

AND REMEMBER . . .
[Thurs] Babrbershop Music Appreciation Day
[Thurs] Embrace Your Geekness Day
[Thurs] Bean ‘n’ Franks Day
[Fri] Tape Measure Day
[Fri] Grand Marnier Day
[Fri] Collector Car Appreciation Day

BULL’S BITS

BS WACK FACTS:
• Historically, today is one of 2 days each year in which there are no scheduled games in any of the 4 major North American professional sports leagues (MLB, NFL, NBA, NHL).  The other?  The day BEFORE the MLB All-Star Game.
• Wilt Chamberlain didn’t win MVP the year he scored 50.4 points and grabbed 22.9 rebounds per game. (Bill Russell did.)
• There are 18 minutes total of action in the average baseball game.
• Jordan Spieth won $61,867 less at The 2015 Masters than Arnold Palmer won in his entire career.
• The average golf ball has 336 dimples.
• “Federer” can be typed entirely with the left hand.

BS THINGS WE’VE ALL SAID IN A DRESSING ROOM:
“I’ll fit into this once I lose my Winter weight.”
“I just won’t sit.”
“I just won’t stand.”
“I just won’t raise my arms.”
“I’ll fit into this once I lose my Fall weight.”
“I had a big lunch.”
“I’ll fit into this once I lose my Spring weight.”
“If I change my mind I can always return it.”
“I’m stuck!”
“Crap.”
“There’s someone in here.”
“THERE’S SOMEONE IN HERE.”
“I’ll fit into this once I lose my Summer weight.”
– McSweeneys.net (Originally published in BS in 2016)

BS PHONE STARTER:
☎The new Spider-Man movie ‘Homecoming’ is doing gangbusters at the box-office.  And by all accounts, it is a good movie.  But was it too early for ANOTHER Spider-Man reboot?  This makes 6 movies and 3 different franchises since 2002.

BS RANDOM JOKE:
Sharing is fun.  Unless it’s your own stuff.

BS WATER COOLER QUESTION:
Question:  1 out of 10 bosses say they’re suspicious of an employee who does THIS. What is it?
Answer:  Keeps their desk too clean.

BS DEEP THOUGHT:
People who are crazy enough to believe they can change the world are the ones who do.


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