Tuesday, July 24, 2012        Edition: #4793

Never Accept a Generic – Ask For Pure “BS”!

BS SHOW BIZ BUZZ:
22-year-old “Glee” star Chris Colfer not only sold his first screenplay recently, he’s just released his first young adult novel, “The Land of Stories”, about a pair of twins who travel into a fairytale world though a magic book given to them by their grandmother (forget Howard Stern, this guy’s becoming the ‘King of All Media’) . . . British gossips are reporting there’s a new blonde in 27-year-old Prince Harry’s life, 23-year-old Cressida Bonas, the model daughter of a former model (enjoy your 15 minutes, girl!) . . . Screenwriter-producer Aaron Sorkin has just fired everyone on the writing staff of his critically-panned HBO show “The Newsroom”, except his ex-girlfriend, Corinne Kinsbury (apparently still respects her professionally though he’s currently dating “Sex & The City” actress Kristin Davis) . . . Former “The Office” regular Mindy Kalling (‘Kelly Kapoor’) has her own show coming this Fall and it now has a (not so inventive) title – “The Mindy Project” (she plays ob/gyn ‘Dr Mindy Lahiri’) . . . Rumored couple Ashton Kutcher & Mila Kunis, who’ve remained coy about their exact relationship, have now been snapped smooching at the LA wrap party for his upcoming movie “Jobs”, about late Apple boss Steve Jobs (they were castmates on “That ‘70s Show” 1998-2006) . . . “The Dark Knight”’s $161-million opening (3rd-best ever) seems to indicate it’s on track to become one of just 12 films to gross over $1 billion worldwide (and it’s doing it without a 3-D surcharge) . . . And actress Helen Mirren, who turns 67 this Thursday, tops a new poll on ‘Stars Who Have Grown Old Gracefully’, finishing ahead of fellow actresses Judi Dench (77) and Meryl Streep (63) among others (and then there’s 54-year-old Melanie Griffith, who looks like a 70-year-old … trout).

TODAY’S SHOW BIZ SKED:

• “America’s Got Talent” (NBC/CityTV) – 12 of the top 48 acts perform.
• “Conan” (TBS/CTV) – The XX (“XX”).
• “Jimmy Kimmel Live” (ABC/CHCH) – Nas (“Life Is Good”).
• “Last Call With Carson Daly” (NBC) – We Were Promised Jetpacks (“In The Pit Of the Stomach”). Rerun.
• “Late Night With Jimmy Fallon” (NBC/CTV2) – Beach House (“Bloom”); Nelly (“M.O.”).
• “Late Show With David Letterman” (CBS/NTV/Omni1) – Allen Stone (“Allen Stone”).
• “Tonight Show With Jay Leno” (NBC/CTV2) – Jay Sean (“Worth It All”).

BS MUSIC NOTES:

• Common – The rapper is facing foreclosure on the Chicago condo he co-owns with his manager. Bank of America claims the pair have failed to make any mortgage payments on the property since March and they now owe more than $345,000.
• Jennifer Lopez – Today she releases her first greatest hits collection, “Dance Again … The Hits”. A deluxe version includes 3 bonus tracks and 11 music videos.
• Ne-Yo – He’s turned down the chance to play Martin Luther King Jr in a new bio-movie because he’d have to gain 30 lbs (14 kg) for the role at the same time as he’d be promoting his new album “RED” (out September 19th).
• Rihanna – She and ex-boyfriend Chris Brown are both currently sunning themselves in St Tropez on the French Riviera and their Twitter feeds seem to indicate that may not be by accident. The story originally was that Drake would be joining her there.
• Slipknot – Today they unleash the best-of set “Antennas to Hell”. The band is spending its Summer as a headliner on the “Rockstar Energy Drink Mayhem Festival”, as well as curating and headlining “Knotfest” August 17-18.
• Spice Girls – They’re set to sing together for the first time since 2008 at the London Olympics closing ceremony August 12th. Also on the bill: George Michael, Jessie J, Take That, and The Who.
• The Who – Tonight in select movie theaters there’s a one-night-only screening of “The Who: Quadrophenia – Can You See The Real Me?: The Story Behind The Album”. The documentary  sets up a North American arena tour this Fall/Winter during which they’ll perform their iconic 1973 double album “Quadrophenia” in its entirety, along with other Who classics.

TODAY’S VIDEO RELEASES:

• “The Deep Blue Sea” ( R-Rated Drama ): In post-WW2 England, a free-spirited, emotionally complex woman trapped in a passionless marriage meets a troubled former pilot, with whom she begins to have a heated affair. Stars Rachel Weisz, Tom Hiddleston.
• “Silent House ( R-Rated Horror Thriller ): A young woman finds herself trapped inside her family’s secluded lake house. With no contact to the outside world and no way out, her panic turns to terror. Filmed in a single uninterrupted shot. Stars Elizabeth Olsen.
• Also released today: “Boss: Season 1” (TV); “Children’s Hospital: The Complete 3rd Season” (TV); “Jiro Dreams of Sushi” (Documentary); “Michael Wood’s Story of England” (Documentary); “Sliders: The 1st & 2nd Seasons” (Sci-Fi TV); and “The Untouchables: The 4th Season” (Vintage TV).

EXTORTION OF THE STARS:
Today a collection of signed photos of stars including Marilyn Monroe and Dean Martin, obtained by a police officer in lieu of speeding tickets, is set to go under the hammer in Los Angeles. Motorcycle cop Roy Garrett let a string of superstars off for speeding and running red lights in Beverly Hills in the 1950s and 60s in exchange for a personally signed photo. Now his extensive collection is up for sale. The Monroe snap alone is expected to go for $32,000. It’s signed: “To Roy, love and kisses. Thanks for keeping me out of the clink.”
NET: http://tinyurl.com/c2glpd8
– Hollywood.com

MORE ANNOYING GUY BEHAVIOR EXPLAINED:

✗ He Texts During Your Date – Shooting off a few texts while you’re out generally means he’s at ease with you rather than disinterested. Tell him it makes you feel like you’re not important and ask if he’ll pocket the phone unless it’s an emergency.
✗ He Says “I Don’t Care” Every Time You Ask His Opinion – When guys have no clue what you want, they’d rather go mute than say the wrong thing. But if he’s still not speaking up after a year, tell him you’re not cool with calling all the shots and need him to be more decisive.
✗ He’s Quiet When He Comes Home From Work – Guys are better at separating their careers from their social lives, so it takes them a little longer to switch out of work mode. If you want to spend post-work time together, pick an activity that doesn’t require a lot of energy.
✗ He Gets Ready At the Last Minute – Instead of nagging him to clean himself up, be a little sneaky. Remind him how sexy he looked when he wore that blue & white striped shirt and threw a little gel in his hair. You’re planting the idea that you love it when he puts in some extra effort.
– Condensed from “Cosmopolitan”

LIFE BY THE NUMBERS:

A BS breakdown of who we are and what we do …
• 70% of kids say they hide their online behavior from their parents.
• 63% of beach-goers say their top pet peeve is people who lift their beach blankets and blow sand everywhere.
• 36% of us have decided to spend less time with Facebook.
• 35% of us skip to the last page of a book because we are impatient.
• 32% of singles would rather give up sex for a year than their favorite food.
• 16% of car owners will discover today that they’ve parked their vehicle under a bird.

FREAKY FUTURE FOOD:

In order to feed the world, science will need to find alternative means. Here are just a few …
• Food Will Come from a Printer – ‘The Cornucopia’ is a 3-D printer developed by the geniuses at MIT that, yes, actually prints food. Instead of ink cartridges, the machine uses special food canisters filled with different raw ingredients.
• Edible Plastic Packaging – Harvard scientists have developed ‘WikiCells’, made entirely of natural food membrane. The edible material is able to hold food and keep it fresh to the same extent as ordinary plastic containers, but it can mimic the taste of whatever is inside.
• Taking Agriculture To the Skies – Thanks to a shortage of arable land, ‘vertical farming’ is being touted as the new alternative. Giant skyscraper farms aim to solve the food production problem the same way regular skyscrapers have solved population issues in large cities.
• Drinks Will Be Made of Your Own Pee – NASA scientists have spent a good $250 million researching how to turn urine back into potable water. They’ve developed a machine that filters wastewater, human sweat, and laundry water to make them clean enough to drink.
• Jell-O Will Be Made of Humans – The most important ingredient in gelatin is collagen, derived from the skin and bones of animals, mostly pigs and cows. But now researchers have found a way to make gelatin by injecting human genes into yeast strains, which is said to be healthier.
(Wouldn’t human Jell-O count as cannibalism?)
– Adapted from Cracked.com

NEW BS GIZMOS & GADGETS:

• ‘Kissenger’ – A strange little egg-shaped device with ruby red lips which allows you to send and receive kisses via the pressure sensitive lips using an Internet connection. It’s supposed to somehow make being alone in the world feel a little more bearable.
NET: http://tinyurl.com/c8puyg5
• ‘Noisy Typer’ – This new application for Macs makes your computer sound like … an old-fashioned manual typewriter. You can even hear the carriage return! But you might have to explain those sounds to your kids. And oh yeah, it’s free.
NET: http://fffff.at/noisy-typer-a-typewriter-for-your-laptop/

BS AMAZING BRAIN FACTS:

✓ It is thought that a yawn works to send more oxygen to the brain, thereby working to cool it down and wake it up.
✓ Your brain is made up of about 75% water.
✓ While awake your brain generates between 10-and-23 watts of power, enough energy to power a lightbulb.
✓ Children who learn 2 languages before the age of 5 develop much denser grey matter.
✓ Your brain stops growing at age 18.
✓ A piece of brain tissue the size of a grain of sand contains some 1 billion synapses all ‘talking’ to one another.
✓ Information in your brain travels at about 268 mph (431 km/hr) … unless, of course, you’re drunk.
– MindJunker.com

BS CHRONOMETER 07.24.12


TODAY’S CELEBIRTHDAYS . . .
1968 [44] Kristin Chenoweth, Broken Arrow OK, 4’-11” TV actress (“The Good Wife” 2012-13, “GCB” 2012, “Pushing Daisies” 2007-09, “The West Wing” 2005-06)/movie actress (“Running With Scissors”, “Four Christmases”)/Broadway actress (“Promises, Promises”, “Wicked”)

1969 [43] Jennifer Lopez, Bronx NY, pop singer (“On the Floor”, “If You Had My Love”)/TV personality (“Q’Viva! The Chosen” 2012, “American Idol” 2011-12)/movie actress (“What to Expect When You’re Expecting”, “Out of Sight”)/Mrs Marc Anthony 2004-12

1975 [37] Eric Szmanda, Milwaukee WI, TV actor (‘Greg Sanders’ on “CSI” since 2000)

1982 [30] Elisabeth Moss, LA CA, TV actress (‘Peggy Olson’ on “Mad Men” since 2007, ‘ Zoey Bartlet’ on “The West Wing” 1999-2006)

1982 [30] Anna Paquin, Winnipeg MB [raised Wellington NZ], TV actress (‘Sookie Stackhouse’ on “True Blood” since 2008)/movie actress (“X-Men” films, 1994 Oscar-“The Piano”)

TODAY’S BS REASONS TO PARTY . . .

• “Cousins Day”, to honor all cousins who are living and pay homage to those who aren’t. (Or, as it’s known in [co-host’s] family, ‘Spouses Day’.)

• “Drive-Thru Day”, honoring all businesses that allow you to shop without leaving your vehicle. There are drive-thru banks, coffee shops, fast-food restaurants, florists, ice cream bars, liquor stores, marriage chapels (Las Vegas), and pharmacies. What’s the weirdest drive-thru business you’ve ever seen?

• “Tell an Old Joke Day”, a good excuse to open up your phone lines and have listeners tell their best joke … but only if they’re under 5.

• “Tequila Day”, celebrating Mexico’s national booze that’s becoming increasingly popular in other drinks beside margaritas. But we still like it the old fashioned way: a little salt, a slice of lime and … hay carumba!

• “Virtual Love Day”, a day for those who have experienced the ‘excitement, joy, and sorrow’ of an online relationship and especially for those who’ve found true love through the Internet. (… with a 400-lb truck driver who calls himself ‘HotMama24’.)
NET: http://tinyurl.com/bncvuwm

TODAY’S MUSIC EVENT . . .

1982 [30] Survivor’s “Eye Of the Tiger” from the movie sequel “Rocky III” tops the pop chart and remains 6 weeks

TODAY’S FIRST . . .

2002 [10] A fleet of six ‘Bicycle Ambulances’, complete with flashing blue lights, sirens, and heart-starting defibrillators, hits the streets of London UK (trials reveal they arrive before traditional ambulances in 88% of cases)

TODAY’S RECORDS . . .

1987 [25] 91-year-old Hulda Crooks became the oldest person ever to climb Japan’s Mt Fuji

2005 [07] US cyclist Lance Armstrong wins a record 7th consecutive Tour de France (still being questioned due to rumors of doping)

AND REMEMBER . . .

[Wed] Be Adamant About Something Day
[Wed] Carousel Day
[Thurs] Chili Dog Day
[Thurs] Aunt & Uncle Day
[Fri] Summer Olympic Games opening (London)
[Fri] “Step Up Revolution”; “The Watch” open in movie theaters
[Fri] Talk In an Elevator Day
This Week Is … Make Someone Smile Week
This Month Is … Horseradish Month

BULL’S BITS


BS THINGS TO DO WHEN THE POWER GOES OUT:
• Flick the light switch 3 or 4 thousand times.
• Play Solitaire with real cards. Yes, real-life comes with Solitaire.
•  Write a letter. It’s like email only you use a pen and paper. For less than a dollar someone will physically carry that actual piece of paper anywhere in the world. Mind blowing!
• Ice cream pig-out! It’s probably all going to melt, so there’s no point in wasting it.
• At least once every 30 seconds, turn to do something on the computer, then turn away in silent disappointment.
– Adapted from BennyDesk.com

BS PHONE STARTER:

☎ The ‘90s revival is in full swing … are you prepared to embrace it?

BS RANDOM JOKE:

When you get right down to it what is Tuesday anyway? It’s just Monday without the attitude.

BS U-PICK TRIVIA:

Which musical instrument do more of us (attempt to) play?
a. Guitar. [CORRECT]
b. Piano.
c. Drums.
– HaLife.com

BS WEB GOODIE:
A British website offers ‘Custom Traffic Reports’ for all areas of the UK. If you’ve got a wizard IT department, some variation of this attached to your station website would be outstanding.
NET: http://www.frixo.com

BS WATER COOLER QUESTION:

Question: A new medical study suggests that once a week is best for THIS.
Answer: Taking a shower.

BS DEEP THOUGHT:

You are young at any age if you are planning for tomorrow.


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