Wednesday, July 25, 2012        Edition: #4794

Bully For You!

29-year-old “Dark Knight Rises” actress Anne Hathaway tells “Hello!” magazine she & partner Adam Shulman are getting married, probably ‘sometime next year-ish’, as she’s too busy this year with 2 big film releases (the 2nd, “Les Misérables” opens December 14th) . . . Actress Rachel Weisz (“The Bourne Legacy”) says she & actor-husband Daniel Craig (“Skyfall”) find it easy to lead a normal life in NYC without being recognized by simply donning a hat, walking quickly, and going about their business (most paparazzi complainers put themselves in vulnerable situations) . . . Actress Kirstie Alley has been hit with a lawsuit over her ‘Organic Liaison’ weight-loss program, a California woman claiming the diet does not work (lady, no fad diets work – just lifestyle changes) . . . This week LA County Sheriff’s Deputies visited the Jackson family home in Calabasas, California and took a battery report after a person inside the property accused someone else of a physical assault (things are getting wackier by the minute, and where the heck is Mama Jackson anyway?) . . . Adult-film aficionado Fred Willard may have lost his PBS-TV gig but he’s still appearing on the improv comedy series “Trust Us With Your Life” (ABC) which had already filmed its full season before his recent ‘incident’ (the publicity can only help this obscure show) . . . Actor Mark Wahlberg has put his 2-acre Beverly Hills estate up for sale for the 3rd time with an asking price just under $13 million, $3 million less than when it was first listed in 2008 (maybe because Demi Moore now lives next door?) . . . Word has it newly-divorced actor Tom Cruise is looking to buy a new home in NYC so he can spend more time with 6-year-old daughter Suri, reportedly something ‘very private’ (so programming sessions are hidden from view) . . . And Suri Cruise has been named ‘World’s Most Stylish Child’ in a new UK-based poll, just ahead of Beyoncé & Jay-Z’s daughter Ivy Blue Carter and Will Smith-spawn Willow Smith (Suri’s wardrobe is rumored to be worth $2 million – sick!).


• “America’s Got Talent” (NBC/CityTV) – UK “X Factor” star Cher Lloyd performs “Want U Back”; 4 acts move on to the top 24.
• “The CLIOS: World’s Best Commercials” (NBC) – JB Smoove hosts a review of innovative award-winning TV ads from around-the-world.
• “Conan” (TBS/CTV) – Tennis (“Young & Old”).
• “Jimmy Fallon’s Primetime Music Special” (NBC) – Popular music sketches from “Late Night With Jimmy Fallon”.
• “Jimmy Kimmel Live” (ABC/CHCH) – Trey Songz (“Chapter V”, out August 21st).
• “Last Call With Carson Daly” (NBC) – Fool’s Gold (“Leave No Trace”). Rerun.
• “Late Night With Jimmy Fallon” (NBC/CTV2) – Wilco (“Mermaid Avenue: The Complete Sessions”).
• “Late Show With David Letterman” (CBS/NTV/Omni1) – Milo Greene (“Milo Greene”).
• “Live With Kelly” (syndicated/CTV) – John Rich (Big & Rich).
• “So You Think You Can Dance” (FOX/CTV) – The finalists perform; contestants face elimination; guest judge Christina Applegate.
• “The Talk” (CBS) – Veteran Motown singer Gladys Knight is guest co-host.
• “Tavis Smiley” (PBS) – Legendary singer-songwriter Carole King. Rerun.
• “Tonight Show With Jay Leno” (NBC/CTV2) – The Lumineers (“The Lumineers”).
• “The View” (ABC/CTV) – Pistol Annies (“Hell on Heels”).


• Billy Currington – The country star is sporting a gash on his lip after being involved in a boating accident. Seems a big wave hit his paddle during a day out at the beach, causing his teeth to bite through his lip. Ouch!
• Bruce Springsteen – A new in-depth profile in “New Yorker” magazine suggests he felt ‘suicidal’ in 1982, the year that his somber album “Nebraska” was released. According to his friend and biographer Dave Marsh, he tried to ‘self-obliterate’ with 4-hour-long concerts.
• Carly Rae Jepsen – The 26-year-old pop singer is denying that she appears in a sex-tape that’s been leaked online. Grainy footage of a woman resembling her spread across the Internet on Monday. Hey girl, welcome to fame!
• INXS – They’re reissuing “Kick” this September to mark the 25th anniversary of their breakthrough album. With more than 14 million copies sold, the 1987 release is one of the biggest Australian albums of all-time. A new deluxe edition will include never-before-seen footage of former frontman Michael Hutchence, who died in 1997.
• Jason Aldean – “Take a Little Ride”, the lead single from his upcoming 5th album, has achieved the highest single debut of his career, coming in at #19 on the “Billboard” Country Songs Chart.
• Jennifer Lopez – Tonight her new video for “Goin’ In” f/Flo Rida has its world premiere during the special “MTV First: Jennifer Lopez”. An exclusive 30-minute interview follows on
The tune appears on the soundtrack of the new movie “Step Up Revolution”, opening Friday.
• Kenny Chesney – “Come Over” has received the fastest Gold Single Certification of his career, reaching the 500,000 sales mark in just over 9 weeks. The track is from his latest album, “Welcome To the Fishbowl”.
• Mariah Carey – It’s official; she’s joining “American Idol” (FOX) as a new judge for its upcoming 12th season. It was just last week that her hubby Nick Cannon suggested the show couldn’t afford her. No details on the numbers yet, though $18 million-a-season is being bandied about.
• Rick Ross – His tour bus has been ransacked and burglarized in Detroit, Michigan while he and his entourage were staying at a nearby hotel. Thousands-of-dollars-worth of items, including jewelry and clothes, were allegedly taken. Nobody was on the bus at the time.


New terms leaking into our lingo …
✓ ‘Binge-tweeter’ – Someone you never hear from who goes Twitter-mad for a brief period and then just disappears.
✓ ‘Culturonomics’ – A new field of research that uses computer data-crunching techniques to examine cultural phenomena.
✓ ‘Perma-camper’ – A homeless person who lives in his or her vehicle, often a minivan. The way they see things, living in a vehicle is a way to stay in control of their lives.


An international delivery service is turning to a team of runners to beat the London Olympics crush. With close to 5 million visitors expected for the games (opening Friday), along with stringent security measures and special Olympic lanes reserved for athletes and employees, getting around is going to be a challenge. So German express delivery service DHL is enlisting London-based JogPost’s team of foot couriers to help make sure its packages get to their recipients on time. JogPost describes its 400-odd roster of largely part-time runners as ‘congestion-busters’. (Next week in London, instead of a traditional black cab, it’ll be faster to take Usain Bolt.)
– AP


The so-called ‘global super-rich elite’ are hiding an estimated $21 trillion in tax havens like the Cayman Islands, according to a new Tax Justice Network study. That’s more than the US and Japanese economies … combined. The report has also found that less than 100,000 people worldwide own about $9.8 trillion of the wealth held offshore. If those figures are correct, the lost tax revenue to countries worldwide is huge. But that’s just the beginning. The $21-trillion figure only covers cash holdings, and does not include possessions like real estate, gold, yachts, and racehorses. (Seems we’re not the 99%, more like the 99.99999%)

• Ogden, Utah – A man dressed in a goat suit who’s seemingly living among a herd of wild goats has been spotted in the mountains of northern Utah. The Utah Division of Wildlife Resources admits the ‘goat-man’ is doing nothing illegal, but says he may be unaware of the dangers as hunting season approaches. (Nice beard, Billy!)
– Associated Press
• London UK – Olympic beach volleyball players have come across an unexpected handicap on practice courts in London’s St James’ Park … squirrels burying their nuts. Some bikini-clad players have been grimacing as they land barefoot on beechnuts and acorns the rodents have been hiding. Groundskeepers are now raking the sand before practice sessions. (Now about the pigeons …)
• Tokyo, Japan – We’ve all heard of ‘hot pants’. Now a Japanese company has invented ‘cool pants’. They’re equipped with 2 battery-powered fans in the pockets that blow cool air onto the wearer’s body. One problem: The pants can inflate, making the wearer look like the Michelin Man … which is anything but cool. (And beware of vapor locks!)

If you get attacked by a shark, you’ll probably live. At least that’s what the experts say. While it’s a bit terrifying that fatalities from shark attacks hit a 20-year high in 2011, with 12 people across the world dying from encounters, most shark attacks actually aren’t fatal. A 2001 review of shark-attack cases found that fully 81% of those attacked suffered only minor injuries that required ‘a simple, primary suture’. (And a search party to find a favorite foot.)
– “Washington Post”


The 2nd annual “Hipster Olympics” have just wrapped in Berlin, Germany. Among the events …
• Horn-rimmed Glasses Hurling
• Best Vintage Moustache Design
• Skinny Jeans Tug-of-War
• Bobbing for Bubble Tea Pearls
• Guess the Value of Popular Electronics
(Great bit for a radio promotion!)


The University of California at San Diego has helped create the lens for a large experimental camera called ‘Aware-2’, that can take a snapshot of an entire football stadium that’s clear enough to let you recognize every single person in attendance. The night-table-sized system is designed to instantaneously take a 1-to-50 gigapixel image that could be used for such things as enriching sports coverage, monitoring wildlife, and surveillance. For security purposes, a single shot of a stadium crowd could be used for real-time face and object recognition. (“Look, there’s Sipowicz in the 43rd row … he booked off sick today!”)
– Condensed from “Union-Tribune”


• The English language continues to grow at an estimated rate of 8,500 new words a year. (No wonder we never know what the hell people are talking about.)
– “Wall Street Journal”
• Bras are 600-years-old. (Like that frayed grey job in your bottom drawer.)
– “The Guardian”


1967 [45] Matt LeBlanc, Newton MA, TV actor (“Episodes” 2011, “Joey” 2004-06, “Friends” 1994-2004)/movie actor (“Jonah Hex”, “Charlie’s Angels” films)

1973 [39] Tony Vincent (Anthony Strascina), Albuquerque NM, Broadway actor (‘St Jimmy’ in “American Idiot” 2009-10, “We Will Rock You” 2003-05, “Rent” 1998-99)

1978 [34] Louise Brown, Oldham, England, world’s first ‘test tube baby’ (conceived outside her mother’s body using the new technique of ‘in-vitro fertilization’)

1985 [27] James Lafferty, Hemet CA, TV actor (“One Tree Hill” 2003-12)


• “Act Like a Caveman Day”, a day to tune in to your wild and primal instincts. Pass me a thigh bone, would ya?

• “Be Adamant About Something Day”, a chance to cease being wishy-washy and have an unyielding opinion about at least one thing. So, what are you adamant about?

• “Culinarians Day”, a special day to salute anyone who cooks.

• “Hot Fudge Sundae Day” because … well, why not?

• “Merry-Go-Round Day”, the anniversary of the device’s first patent 141 years ago (1871) by William Schneider of Davenport, Iowa. He did not invent it, however, as ‘carousel’ rides may go back as far as 500 AD.


1990 [22] Before a ball game, Roseanne Barr sings an off-key rendition of the national anthem to a booing crowd at Jack Murphy Stadium in San Diego CA, then scratches herself and spits


2001 [11] Mariah Carey cancels upcoming engagements and checks herself into a Connecticut psychiatric hospital suffering from an ‘emotional & physical breakdown’


1992 [20] Opening ceremonies of the 25th Summer Olympics in Barcelona, Spain, the 1st ever in which professional athletes are allowed to participate


2010 [02] Wikileaks publishes classified documents about the war in Afghanistan, one of the largest leaks in US military history


[Thurs] Chili Dog Day
[Thurs] Aunt & Uncle Day
[Thurs] All or Nothing Day
[Fri] Talk In an Elevator Day
[Fri] System Administrator Appreciation Day
[Fri] Take Your Houseplants For a Walk Day
[Fri] Walk on Stilts Day
This Week Is … Garlic Week
This Month Is … Family Golf Month


• Craps would be a demonstration sport.
• Win a gold medal, your room and all meals are comped.
• Olympic judges replaced by pit bosses.
• Clear 7’-11” in high jump … win a million dollars.
• Sequined shot puts.
• Scoreboard shows medal count … and keno numbers.
• Topless synchronized swimming.
• Medals come in bronze, silver, and gold lamé.


☎ What’s your top tip on how to get a day off work?


Which animal closes its eyes when it swallows?
a. Rabbit.
b. Turtle.
c. Frog. [CORRECT]


No matter how pathetic you are, there’s someone out there who is equally pathetic and who will marry you.


Question: THIS business has had a 30% increase in customers in the last year.
Answer: Tattoo removal.


What we learn after we know it all is what counts.

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