Thursday, July 28, 2011        Edition: #4559

Good Morning, Sheetheads!

Tickets for this year’s “Virgin Mobile FreeFest” on September 10th in Columbia MD are gone, but fans can still EARN tickets by volunteering at homeless youth shelters in Maryland, Virginia, and Washington DC through the “RE*Generation” program (now there’s a great idea to steal!) . . . Comedian/TV host George Lopez is now refusing to rule out running for mayor of Los Angeles in 2018, despite previously dismissing his political declaration as a joke (likely depends on whether his show gets renewed) . . . 39-year-old actress Selma Blair (“Hellboy”) has become a first-time mom after giving birth to a baby boy named ‘Arthur Saint’ via her boyfriend, fashion designer Jason Bleick (she’ll find out if he’s still a ‘Saint’ about the time he turns 2) . . . Actor Neil Patrick Harris (“How I Met Your Mother”) has played down reports he’s preparing to wed his longtime partner  David Burtka now that same-sex marriage has been legalized in New York, insisting they have no plans and don’t want their wedding to become ‘a big, giant thing’ (marrying has become the easy part; same-sex divorce can be impossible) . . . A new report suggests reality TV twosome Jesse James & Kat Von D ended their engagement this week due to a blowout argument about – another woman (the guy’s a serial cheater!) . . . Meantime, a sneak-peek of the upcoming season premiere of “LA Ink” reveals that Kat Von D has had a tattoo of James’ face in a childhood school photo tattooed on her left side (seems it will be more permanent than the relationship) . . . And the so-called ‘runaway bride’, Crystal Harris, is spilling the beans on former fiancé Hugh Hefner, claiming she’s ‘never seen him naked’ as he ‘doesn’t really take off his clothes’ and they only had sex once during their 2-year relationship, which lasted ‘like about 2 seconds’ (Hef’s corollary: one 85-year-old + one 25-year-old = 0 self-esteem).

• “Ellen DeGeneres Show” (syndicated/A Channel) –The Band Perry (“The Band Perry”).
• “Jimmy Kimmel Live” (ABC/CHCH) – Lady Gaga (“Born This Way”).
• “Last Call With Carson Daly” (NBC) – The Black Angels (“Phosphene Dream”).
• “Late Show With David Letterman” (CBS/NTV/Omni) – Fountains Of Wayne (“Sky Full of Holes”).
• “Live With Regis & Kelly” (syndicated/CTV) – 3 Doors Down (“Time Of My Life”).
• “So You Think You Can Dance” (FOX/CTV) – 2 contestants are eliminated; the top 4 finalists are revealed.
• “Tonight Show With Jay Leno” (NBC/A Channel) – Stevie Nicks (“In Your Dreams”).
• “The View” (ABC/CTV) – Beyoncé (“4”).

• Amy Winehouse – The late soul singer’s father has announced plans to open a charitable foundation in her name to help people struggling with alcohol & drug addiction.
• Cee-Lo Green – He’s announced a 5th album from his group Goodie Mob will be out this fall, entitled “We Sell Drugs Too!”.
• Chris Young – “Tomorrow” is #1 on the new “Billboard” magazine ‘Country Songs’ chart. It’s his 4th consecutive chart-topper.
• 50 Cent – He’s dropped plans to launch his 5th studio album later this year following a disagreement with his record label Interscope. He warns the company that unless it works harder to make his music a success, he won’t put out another album.
• Kenny Chesney – He’s written a new song titled “Rise Up” for an upcoming ESPN reality TV series of the same name which will upgrade athletic facilities in needy high schools. The first episode airs September 13th.
• Nicki Minaj – She’s been fined 1,000 Jamaican dollars (a little under $12) for swearing her way through a performance at a Jamaican music festival. (In Jamaica, they don’t like the swearing, but overtly homophobic dancehall records are just fine.)
• Pearl Jam – A trailer for the upcoming “Pearl Jam Twenty” documentary, directed by Cameron Crowe, is now online. It shows various footage of the band over the years set to their tune “Given to Fly”. A special website lists where the film will be screening, starting September 20th.
• Radiohead – Drummer Philip Selway says their surprise performance at this summer’s Glastonbury Festival in Britain gave the band ‘a new lease of life’, and they’re now discussing hitting the road for a new tour.
• Weezer / Flaming Lips – Tonight & tomorrow in Holmdel NJ they literally share the stage together, trading off songs back-and-forth for the entire length of each concert.
• The Who – Pete Townshend has revealed on his blog they’ll go on the road next year to perform their album “Quadrophenia” once frontman Roger Daltrey finishes his current “Tommy” tour. The 66-year-old also claims his hearing is getting better because he’s ‘taking good care of it’. (Well, a tour will certainly fix that!)
• Zac Brown Band – Their ‘Southern Ground’ line of cookbooks, spices, and sauces has been picked up by a national outdoor retailer. And their new ‘Zac Brown Band Hat’ with a hand-tooled leather patch will benefit a charitable organization that provides shoes to underprivileged worldwide. (And oh yeah … they’re also in the music biz.)

A BS selection of movies in the making …
• “Beauty & The Beast” – 21-year-old “Harry Potter” actress Emma Watson will reportedly star in a new live-action film adaptation of the well-known French fairytale to be directed by Guillermo Del Toro (“Pan’s Labyrinth”, “Hellboy”). Little else is known about the planned flick. Disney’s 1991 animated version made close to $400 million worldwide.
• “Haywire” – Mixed martial arts champ Gina Carano looks set to become Hollywood’s latest female action star, fighting crime on the bigscreen in Steven Soderbergh’s new thriller. She plays a secret service operative seeking revenge on her betrayers. The film co-stars Antonio Banderas, Channing Tatum, Ewan McGregor, and Michael Douglas. It opens in January 2012.
• “Immortals” – Freida Pinto (“Slumdog Millionaire”) says she ‘thoroughly enjoyed’ her first day on the set of this action drama set in ancient Greece after she was told to jump into bed with her British co-star Henry Cavill (“Man of Steel”) in the very first scene. She plays a priestess who romances Cavill’s character ‘Theseus’, the king of Athens. The film opens this November.
• “Mental” – Liev Schreiber has signed on for director PJ Hogan’s latest comedy film alongside Toni Collette, playing a politician who has to find a nanny for his 5 daughters after his numerous affairs put his wife in hospital with a nervous breakdown. He ends up hiring a wacky hitchhiker and – well – hijinks ensue. Shooting is just underway in Australia this week.
• “Prometheus” – This latest installment in the long-running “Alien” franchise is being directed by Ridley Scott, who helmed the chest-bursting original in 1979. The new film starring Charlize Theron, Michael Fassbender (“X-Men: First Class”), and Noomi Rapace (“The Girl With the Dragon Tattoo”) takes place prior to events in the ‘Ripley’ era. It opens next June.
• “Sin City 2” – Director Robert Rodriguez has revealed the script is almost finished for a sequel to his hit 2005 action-thriller based on the graphic novel by Frank Miller. The original film boasted an all-star cast that included Clive Owen, Bruce Willis, Jessica Alba, and Mickey Rourke. No scheduling for shooting the sequel has yet been released.

Mice from different countries have likely interbred, producing what researchers call a ‘freaky’ and ‘superior’ house-mouse that is resistant to poisons. A recent study of mice found in a German bakery found they had interbred with Algerian mice to develop immunity to even a very concentrated version of the common rat poison warfarin. Looks like these unwelcome visitors are determined to stick around, no matter what we throw at them! (Rodents of the future will eat poison pellets like candy.)
– “Discovery News”

A new ranking of the best American eateries owned by the famous …
5. “The Kingfish Café” – Former NBA point guard Gary Payton, Seattle WA.
4. “Ana Mandara” – Actor Don Johnson, San Francisco CA.
3. “Elway’s” – Former NFL QB John Elway, Denver CO.
2. “one sixtyblue” – Ex-NBA superstar Michael Jordan, Chicago IL.
1. “Market Restaurant & Bar” – Skateboarding phenom Tony Hawk, Del Mar CA.

South Korea has announced it plans to spend over $2 billion developing digital textbooks, replacing paper in all of its schools by 2015. Students will access paper-free learning materials from a cloud-based system, supplementing traditional content with multimedia on school-supplied tablets. The system will also enable homebound students to catch up on work remotely. (Now boys will be asking girls on the way home, “Can I carry your tablet?”)

Smartphone-controlled robots are aiding astronauts on the International Space Station. While NASA’s final Space Shuttle flight carried the 1st iPhone into space, it’s Android phones that are doing the real work of assisting astronauts. The 3 volleyball-sized ‘SPHERES’ robots that help workers on the International Space Station have now received an upgrade that links them to Android OS smartphones, allowing NASA’s Mission Control to command the robots from the ground … by phone. (Imagine the roaming charges!)

When Yoav Medan’s mother died it seemed there just wasn’t enough room on her tombstone to write what the family felt best suited her. So the Israeli-based medical technology executive thought outside of the box (or rectangle, as it were) and decided to put a QR code (the kind your smartphone reads) on her grave in Haifa, Israel. It links to an ever-changing web page about his mother and features pictures from her life and reminiscences from family & friends. (Great idea, except technology will quickly move on in about 5 minutes. Someday archeologists will wonder what this curious hieroglyphic is all about.)

Since 1982, the English Department of San Jose State University has invited people to write terrible opening lines for novels, most of which are presumably never written. The contest is named after Edward George Bulwer-Lytton, who infamously began his 1830 novel “Paul Clifford” with the trite line “It was a dark and stormy night”. This year’s winner, composed by Sue Frodie: “Cheryl’s mind turned like the vanes of a wind-powered turbine, chopping her sparrow-like thoughts into bloody pieces that fell onto a growing pile of forgotten memories.”

• Ceiling fans can be switched to rotate in either direction for a reason. The counter-clockwise ‘summer’ setting ensures the blades spin to push air down, while the ‘winter’ setting reverses the spin to pull warm air up and spill it down the sides of the room. (The ‘extra-fast’ setting is for hair-trimming.)
– “Sydney Sun-Herald”
• Facebook game-maker Zynga is partnering with China’s online social network Tencent to launch a version of its “CityVille” game for the Chinese market. (Meaning 674 million more people will be frittering away time when they’re supposed to be working).


1945 [66] Jim Davis, Marian IN, really rich cartoonist (“Garfield”)

1954 [57] Hugo Chavez, Sabaneta, Venezuela, President of Venezuela since 1999 who’s recently been receiving cancer treatments in Cuba

1957 [54] Scott Pelley, San Antonio TX, TV news anchor (“CBS Evening News” since June 6, succeeding Katie Couric)/TV news correspondent (“60 Minutes” since 1999)

1976 [35] Jacoby Shaddix, Mariposa CA, alt-rock singer (Papa Roach-“Lifeline”, “Last Resort”)

1990 [21] Soulja Boy Tell ‘Em (DeAndre Way), Chicago IL, rapper (“Kiss Me Thru the Phone”, “Crank That [Soulja Boy]”)

• “Beatrix Potter Day”, honoring the English author who created the “Peter Rabbit” children’s books on the anniversary of her 1866 birth. (Subject of the 2006 Renée Zellweger film, “Miss Potter”.)

• “Chili Dog Day”, celebrating the gooey goodness of layering spicy chili-con-carne atop a hot dog.

• “Great Texas Mosquito Festival” through Saturday in Clute TX, home of the world’s largest mosquito, ‘Willie Man Chew’. Participants put on their bug repellent and celebrate with the ‘Mr & Mrs Mosquito Legs Contest’ and a ‘Mosquito-Calling Contest’.

• “Milk Chocolate Day”, an excuse for chocoholics everywhere to cow down!

2006 [05] Actor-director Mel Gibson vents an ill-advised anti-Semitic tirade as he’s arrested for DUI in Malibu CA (the ensuing police mug shot is pretty much a career killer)

1973 [38] In the 5th-largest concert event of all-time, some 600,000 pack “Summer Jam” rock festival at Watkins Glen NY featuring the Grateful Dead, the Allman Bros, and The Band

1996 [15] Dr Jochen Heuer of Luebeck, Germany performs a successful kidney transplant operation … using his own kidney

1979 [32] A cushioned egg dropped from the top of the 1815-ft (553-m) CN Tower in Toronto, Ontario lands unbroken

[Fri] “Cowboys & Aliens”; “Crazy, Stupid, Love”; “The Smurfs” open in movie theaters
[Fri] Lasagna Day
[Fri] Lumberjack Day
[Fri] Talk In an Elevator Day
[Fri] System Administrator Appreciation Day
[Sat] Cheesecake Day
[Sat] Father-In-Law Day
This Week Is … Moby Dick Week
This Month Is … Smart Irrigation Month


• “Is that a mirror in your anodized titanium exterior plating? Because I can see myself in your service port.”
• “If I said you had a bootable body would you bolt it against me?”
• “Do you have Intel inside? No? Would you like to?”
• “Should I send you an encrypted wireless transmission for breakfast or manually initiate your boot-up sequence?”
• “… then I guess a lube job is out of the question?”
• “And here’s the little-known 4th law of robotics: It’s my duty to please that booty!”
• “You are built like a defecating facility made from stone-like red polygons.”
– Thanks to Chris White

This spell of warm, humid weather occurs almost every year. Meteorologists call it ‘summer’.

Imagine a ‘best day ever’. What kinds of things would you do?

Today’s Question: Most women probably don’t know this but 56% of men would prefer you don’t wear THIS in the summer.
Answer to Give Out Next Show: Sunglasses.

To every exception there is a rule.

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