Tuesday, July 31, 2012        Edition: #4798

Monthly Planning Calendar in Today’s Issue!

Danny Boyle’s Olympic Opening Ceremony is now officially a hit, with the 36-tune soundtrack to “Isles of Wonder” rocketing to the top 5 at both the iTunes store and Amazon.com (10,000 copies sold immediately after the show Friday night) . . . Actress Kristen Stewart’s affair with Rupert Sanders may not have been the ‘momentary indiscretion’ she has claimed, the director’s brother-in-law telling “People” he believes it went on for months (maybe she’s a better actress than we thought!) . . . Meantime, a source tells “The Sun” 26-year-old cuckold Robert Pattinson has ‘nobody to talk to’ about his failed relationship and is spending most of his time playing computer games in the hotel where he’s been staying since moving out of Stewart’s home (with the final “Twilight” film opening in November, producers are likely having fits) . . . James Cameron’s sequel to 2009’s “Avatar” has been pushed back to 2015, as the filmmaker plans to move to New Zealand for at least 18 months while he shoots 2 followup movies (he’s already purchased 2,500 acres of farmland as his base) . . . 58-year-old movie actor Dennis Quaid says he’s excited to move away from the bigscreen and get involved in the upcoming new CBS-TV drama “Vegas”, because ‘a lot of the best writers are now working in television’ (BS translation: I haven’t had a hit movie in a decade) . . . And actress Olivia Munn (“Magic Mike”) tells “NY Daily News” she doesn’t bite her nails but extreme bouts of anxiety do cause her to rip out her eyelashes, forcing her to wear falsies whenever she leaves home (2 words: weird and … ouch!).


• “Conan” (TBS/CTV) – The Fray (“Scars & Stories”).
• “George Stroumboulopoulos Tonight” (CBC) – Arkells (“Michigan Left”).
• “Jimmy Kimmel Live” (ABC/CHCH) – Grace Potter & The Nocturnals (“The Lion The Beast The Beat”). Rerun.
• “Late Show With David Letterman” (CBS/NTV/Omni1) – Diamond Rugs (“Diamond Rugs”). Rerun.
• “Tavis Smiley” (PBS) – Glen Hansard (“Rhythm & Repose”). Rerun.

• Blur – Today the 1990s Brit alt-rockers release “Blur 21: Collector’s Boxed Set”, a career-spanning compilation of 7 studio albums alongside over 5 hours of unreleased material. In addition to the 21-disc box set, the albums are being re-released individually. Blur will headline the closing concert of the 2012 London Olympics.
• Jay-Z – He & Beyoncé are reportedly spending $400,000 to rent a holiday home in the Hamptons on Long Island for the month of August. The 11-acre property known as ‘The Sandcastle’, currently on the market for $43.5 million, features a 60-ft heated pool, tennis courts, bowling alley, virtual golf, and a skateboard half-pipe.
• Joss Stone – Today she releases “The Soul Sessions Volume 2”, the followup to her hit 2003 debut album, “The Soul Sessions”. The new collection features 11 covers of soul classics, ranging from the Chi-Lites to Broken Bells. Stone has reportedly turned down the chance to mentor singers on the UK version of “The Voice” because she dislikes the competition aspect of TV talent shows.
• Mariah Carey – Oh oh, she’s acting again! She’s signed to appear in the upcoming film “The Butler”, a decades-spanning tale about a White House staffer that stars Forest Whitaker. A number of high-profile actors will play US presidents, including Robin Williams (Eisenhower), John Cusack (Nixon), and Alan Rickman (Reagan).
• Rick Ross – Today’s album release, “God Forgives, I Don’t”, features tons of special guests, including Drake, Dr Dre, Jay-Z, Omarion, Usher, and  Wale.
• Whitney Houston – Today her final recordings appear on “Sparkle: The Original Motion Picture Soundtrack”. It includes a duet with Jordin Sparks and tracks from Sparks and Cee Lo Green. The movie stars Houston and Sparks and is due in theaters August 17th.
• Zac Brown Band – Their latest album “Uncaged” remains #1 for a 2nd week in-a-row on “Billboard” magazine’s ‘Country Albums’ chart. It’s the week’s 2nd-best-seller overall. (See Celebirthdays.)


• “Le Havre” ( NR Dramedy ): An audience favorite at this year’s Cannes Film Festival, Finnish director Aki Kaurismaeki’s film follows a kindly man who shines shoes for a living as he stands up to officials who are trying to deport a young African refugee. Stars Blondin Miguel, Andre Wilms, Kati Outinen, Jean-Pierre Darroussin.
• “LOL” ( PG-13 Romantic Comedy ): Miley Cyrus stars in a story that’s perhaps less dramatic than her real-life growing pains. Writer-director Lisa Azuelos has remade her French film about a broken-hearted schoolgirl who’s surprised when her best friend reveals his feelings for her. Co-stars Ashley Greene, Demi Moore, Douglas Booth.
• Also released today: “Costume Drama Classic Collection” (Compilation); “Fat Albert & The Cosby Kids: The Complete Series” (Vintage TV); “Going for Gold: The 1948 Games” (Documentary); “Magic School Bus: The Complete Series” (TV Animation); “Melrose Place: The Final Season” (Vintage TV); “The Story Of the Costume Drama” (Documentary); “The Weight Of the Nation” (Documentary); and “Wolverine Anime: The Complete Series” (TV Animation).


• A sleepy hamlet in Germany could become one of the richest towns in the world. All it has to do is … collect a 450-year-old debt. A certificate recently found buried in an archive attests that the town, Mittenwalde, lent the city of Berlin 400 guilders on May 28, 1562 which was to be repaid at the rate of 6% interest per year. That comes to about $127 million today.
– NYPost.com
• The winners of an unusual raffle in the small Argentinian town of Bialet Masse should count themselves lucky because it means … they’re actually getting paid. The town doesn’t have sufficient funds to pay all of its employees. So the mayor has announced they’ll be holding a raffle to determine which of the town’s employees will get paid first.
– “Daily Telegraph”


Tips on getting a stylist-level cut at barber-shop prices …
• Be Realistic About Your Hair – Have thick, Brillo-pad hair but want it to hang like Johnny Depp’s? Not gonna happen.
• Speak Up – Before any sharp objects come near your head, be specific about what you want and don’t hold back. By being more high-maintenance, you’re more likely to get the look you like.
• Talk the Talk – Knowing common salon terms and using them correctly can really help your barber get the gist, such as ‘tapering’, ‘texturizing’, ‘thinning’, ‘blending’, and … ‘cowlick’.
• Bring Visual Aids – Look through some magazines before you visit for styles you’d like to try. If you want the haircut you had last year, bring a photo of yourself with that haircut.
– ModernMan.com


Depression and anxiety affect every society in the world, according to a comprehensive new study from Australia’s University of Queensland. In Western societies, anxiety disorders are more commonly reported than in non-Western societies. About 10% of people in North America, Western Europe, Australia, and New Zealand are experiencing clinical anxiety, compared to 6% in Asia. The opposite seems true for depression, with researchers finding it lowest in North America and highest in certain areas of Asia. (We’re more anxious? That’s depressing.)
– PsychCentral.com


Between soccer practices and school plays, it’s easy to put romance on the back burner. Show some appreciation for your man with these tips straight from real guys yearning for a little TLC …
✓ Participate in his hobbies.
✓ Bring him dessert from your girls-night-out dinner.
✓ Reenact your first meeting.
✓ Be his personal masseuse.
✓ Surprise him with something new from the kitchen.
✓ Take control of ‘date night’ so he doesn’t have to worry about a thing.
✓ Plan ‘Happy Hour’ at home.
✓ Be on-time … for once.
– Condensed from “Redbook”

Extensive regulations have made it increasingly difficult for smokers to find space in downtown Tokyo to feed their habit. But one Japanese company sees the city’s severely tough smoking restrictions as a business opportunity. General Fundex opened up 3 smoking facilities around a busy mass transit station earlier this month. Called ‘ippuku’ (a puff), the rooms are equipped with air conditioners, chairs, and vending machines. Open from 6 am-to-midnight, use of one of the facilities costs 50 yen (about 65¢ or roughly the price of 3 cigarettes). There is no time limit. (A much better idea than that alcove outside your workplace that’s littered with a million butts.)
– TheGlobeandMail.com


• The Olympic Village at London 2012 has its own mayor.
– BBC News
• Between Laos’s first Olympics in 1980 and 2004, all its competitors came in either last or 2nd-last.
– “Times of London”


1965 [47] JK (Joanne) Rowling, Yate UK, mega-selling author who’s gone from struggling single mom to world’s first billionaire author in a single decade/her character ‘Harry Potter’ shares the same birthday  UP NEXT: “The Casual Vacancy”, published September 27, 2012.

1978 [34] Zac Brown, Cumming GA, country singer (Zac Brown Band-“No Hurry”, “Chicken Fried”)

1978 [34] Will Champion, Southampton UK, rock drummer (Coldplay-“Paradise”, “Viva La Vida”)

1979 [33] BJ Novak, Newton MA, TV actor (‘Ryan Howard’ on “The Office” since 2005)/movie actor (“Inglourious Basterds”)

1981 [31] M Shadows (Matthew Sanders), Huntington Beach CA, heavy metal singer/guitarist (Avenged Sevenfold-“Buried Alive”, “So Far Away”)

• “Invite the Neighbors Over Day”, an initiative to encourage us to get to know those who live nearby. (And ask them to bring along their frickin’ dog that never quits yap-yap-yapping and that sputtering lawnmower they insist on using at 6 am on a Saturday and …)

• “Make Homemade Ice Cream Day”, because you’re looking way too skinny of late. As well as a good recipe, you’ll need some ice, some salt to melt the ice, and whole lot of elbow grease (or an electric ice cream maker).

• “Mutts Day”, honoring all dogs of mixed breeds. Purebred owners often view them as lesser in many ways but mutt owners know better!


1995 [17] Walt Disney Co acquires Capital Cities-ABC Inc (including ABC-TV) in a $19-billion deal


1922 [90] 1st ‘Water Skis’ (Minnesota’s Ralph Samuelson)


[Aug 1] Full ‘Sturgeon’ Moon / Girlfriends Day / Respect For Parents Day / Rounds Resounding Day / Spider-Man Day / World Wide Web Day
[Aug 3] “Diary Of a Wimpy Kid: Dog Days”; “Total Recall” open in movie theaters / Watermelon Day / Osheaga Music & Arts Festival begins (Montréal QC) / Lollapalooza begins (Chicago IL) / Watershed Music Festival begins (George WA)
[Aug 4] Chocolate Chip Day / Mustard Day / Single Working Women’s Day
[Aug 5] 50th anniversary of Marilyn Monroe’s death / Assistance Dog Day / Friendship Day / International Beer Day / Doll Day / Kids Day / Underwear Day / Sisters Day
[Aug 6] Civic Holiday (7 provinces) / Hiroshima Day / Fresh Breath Day
[Aug 7] Lighthouse Day / National Night Out / Particularly Preposterous Packaging Day / Professional Speakers Day
[Aug 8] “Nitro Circus the Movie 3D” opens in movie theaters / Date to Create / Happiness Happens Day / Sneak Some Zucchini Onto Your Neighbor’s Porch Night
[Aug 9] International Day Of the World’s Indigenous People
[Aug 10] “The Bourne Legacy”; “The Campaign” open in movie theaters / Smithsonian Day / S’mores Day / Capitol Hoedown begins (Ottawa ON) / Outside Lands Festival begins (San Francisco CA)
[Aug 11] Kool-Aid Day / Garage Sale Day / 2012 Honda Civic Tour begins (Bristow VA)
[Aug 12] Olympics Closing Ceremony (London) / International Youth Day / Sewing Machine Day / Vinyl Record Day
[Aug 13] International Lefthanders Day
[Aug 15] “The Odd Life of Timothy Green” opens in movie theaters / Best Friends Day / Medical Dosimetrist Day / Relaxation Day
[Aug 17] “The Expendables 2”; “ParaNorman”; “Sparkle” open in movie theaters / Thrift Shop Day / Men’s Grooming Day / Hug Your Boss Day / Rockstar Energy Drink Uproar Festival begins (Kansas City MO)
[Aug 18] Bad Poetry Day / International Geocaching Day / Mail Order Catalogue Day / Serendipity Day
[Aug 19] Aviation Day / Eid-Al Fitr (Muslim) / World Humanitarian Day
[Aug 20] World Mosquito Day / Cupcake Day / International Homeless Animals Day
[Aug 21] Ecological Debt Day / Poets Day / Senior Citizens Day
[Aug 22] Southern Hemisphere Hoodie Hoo Day / Be an Angel Day
[Aug 23] Day For the Remembrance Of the Slave Trade & Its Abolition
[Aug 24] “The Apparition”; “Hit & Run”; “Premium Rush” open in movie theaters / Reading & Leeds Festivals begin (UK) / Pluto Demoted Day / Waffle Day
[Aug 25] International Bat Night / Kiss & Make Up Day / Secondhand Wardrobe Day
[Aug 26] Dog Day / Women’s Equality Day
[Aug 28] Full ‘Blue’ Moon / Race Your Mouse Around the Icons Day / Radio Commercials Day / Crackers Over The Keyboard Day
[Aug 29] “Lawless”; “The Oogieloves in the Big Balloon Adventure” open in movie theaters / According to Hoyle Day / International Day Against Nuclear Tests / More Herbs, Less Salt Day / XIV Paralympics Games open (London)
[Aug 30] Holistic Pet Day / Toasted Marshmallow Day
[Aug 31] “The Possession” opens in movie theaters / Love Litigating Lawyers Day


✗ A jigger-and-half over ice with a lemon twist.
✗ A forward double-flip with one-and-a-half twists and a half-caf, half-decaf double espresso.
✗ A forward 2 1/2 somersault while smoking a pipe and reading “Remembrance Of Things Past”.
✗ A backward 2 1/2 somersault with 1 twist while ordering Chinese food on a cellphone.
✗ A forward 3 1/2 somersault with the hand clap from the “Friends” theme song in a pike position.
✗ A triple Lutz with a forward 1 1/2 somersault while wearing ice skates with a big splash.
✗ An inward 3 1/2 somersault tuck while wearing a bulletproof vest and being shot at.
✗ Moonwalking off the diving platform into a back 2 1/2 somersault with a crotch grab while playing the air guitar.
✗ A backward 1 1/2 somersault with 2 1/2 twists in the arms-wrapped-tightly-around-the-neck-so-it-looks-like-I’m-making-out-with-someone-from-behind position.
– Thanks to Peter Schooff


☎ What personal rights do you think you should have in your office workspace?


Messy? The guy cleans his car out with a leaf blower.


Which is illegal in the city of San Francisco?
a. Waking up a bear to take its picture.
b. Failing to properly accessorize.
c. Washing or drying your car with used underwear. [CORRECT]
– HaLife.com

Question: According to a Gallup Poll, 8-out-of-10 of us have done THIS in the car at least once.
Answer: Sung.


When you don’t know what to do at work, walk fast and look worried.

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