Wednesday, July 4, 2012        Edition: #4779

Don’t Forget to Renew or It’s No Sheet, Sherlock!

BS SHOW BIZ BUZZ:
Sorta actor David Arquette has named his new Hollywood nightclub that features singing, dancing, and puppets (?!?!?!?) after his mom, Bootsy Bellows (wasn’t she Betty Boop’s 2nd cousin?) . . . HBO has already renewed its high-profile new TV drama “The Newsroom” for a 2nd season and is also bringing back vampire drama “True Blood” for a 6th season (critics score “the Newsroom” only 5.7 out-of-10, but viewers give it an 8.6) . . . Meantime a new spin-off comedy called “The Farm”, starring ‘Dwight Schrute’, Rainn Wilson’s off-kilter character on “The Office” (NBC), will sneak peek as an episode in the upcoming 9th season before attempting to make a go of it on its own (5 years ago maybe, but now?) . . . Feisty actor and paparazzo-puncher Alec Baldwin has quit Twitter (everybody now, 1-2-3 “Hurray!”) . . . Speaking of actors with anger issues, Mel Gibson’s stepmother has requested a restraining order from him after claiming he spit in her face (his Christmas card list just keeps getting shorter and shorter) . . . And UK’s “Daily Mail” notes that Tom Cruise ‘s unlucky number must be 33, as the marriages to all 3 of his wives, Mimi Rogers, Nicole Kidman, and now Katie Holmes, went south when each was 33-years-old (celeb blogger Perez Hilton has followed the coincidence further, noting the 1st Church of Scientology was established in Phoenix, Arizona – on the 33rd parallel).

TODAY’S SHOW BIZ SKED:

• “Boston Pops Fireworks Spectacular” (CBS) – Hosted by actor Michael Chiklis and featuring the Boston Pops orchestra led by Keith Lockhart. Guest star is Jennifer Hudson.
• “A Capitol Fourth” (PBS) – Tom Bergeron hosts. Josh Turner, Kool & The Gang, Phillip Phillips perform.
• “Conan” (TBS/CTV) – Young Jeezy f/Ne-Yo (“TM 103 Hustlerz Ambition”). Rerun.
• “Ellen DeGeneres Show” (syndicated/CTV2) – Foster the People (“Torches”). Rerun.
• “Front Row Center” (PBS) – The Beach Boys reunite in celebration of their 50th anniversary.
• “Jimmy Kimmel Live” (ABC/CHCH) – Katy Perry (“Teenage Dream: The Complete Confection”); The Offspring (“Days Go By”). Rerun.
• “Last Call With Carson Daly” (NBC) – Father John Misty (“Fear Fun”). Rerun.
• “Late Late Show With Craig Ferguson” (CBS) – Steven Tyler (Aerosmith). Rerun.
• “Late Night With Jimmy Fallon” (NBC/CTV2) – Carly Rae Jepsen (“Curiosity”). Rerun.
• “Late Show With David Letterman” (CBS/NTV/Omni1) – Beach House (“Bloom”). Rerun.
• “Live With Kelly” (syndicated/CTV) – Guest co-host Kevin Jonas (Jonas Bros).
• “Macy’s 4th of July Fireworks Spectacular in New York” (NBC) – Regis Philbin hosts the biggest fireworks display in America; further enhanced with performances by Katy Perry, Kenny Chesney.
• “Tonight Show With Jay Leno” (NBC/CTV2) – Joe Henry f/Lisa Hannigan (“Reverie”). Rerun.

BS MUSIC NOTES:

• Chris Brown – Two women caught in the crossfire of last month’s bar brawl between Brown’s and Drake’s entourages are suing the owners of the NYC nightclub, WiP, for allegedly continuing to serve alcohol to drunk patrons. (How come no one’s suing the perpetrators?)
• Eminem – He’s confirmed he’s back in the studio crafting his 8th album. He says he’s still in the early stages of recording and the material has yet to take shape. But, as usual, he will work with Dr Dre at some point in the process.
• Lady Antebellum – The North American leg of their “Own the Night World Tour” closed this past weekend, playing to a total of more than 1 million fans during the 85-city run. Next up, Europe, then Australia. The tour concept started with a simple production sketch … on a paper plate.
• Maroon 5 – Adam Levine admits in “Q” magazine he’s used magic mushrooms in the past, and claims the experience helped him rediscover a ‘childlike view of the world’. He claims the experience was valuable and beneficial but strongly advises against regular use.
• Van Halen – After postponing all tour dates after June 26, they’ve now officially canceled those shows completely, according to Pollstar.com. The band has not yet issued a statement on the tour being axed, but in June Eddie Van Halen said they had simply over-committed themselves.

TIME-OFF AROUND-THE-WORLD:

Number of paid annual vacation days as legislated by selected countries …
• 30 days … France.
• 25 days … Finland, Norway, Sweden.
• 22 days … Austria, Portugal, Spain.
• 20 days … Australia, Belgium, Denmark, Germany, Greece, Ireland, Italy, Netherlands, New Zealand, Switzerland, UK.
• 10 days … Canada, Japan.
• 0 days … USA. (To be fair, some individual states and local governments have minimum paid vacation laws.)
– TheAtlantic.com

SCYTHE MATTERS:

Schythes may seem like a throwback to the old days. Then again, long-handled, crescent-bladed implements don’t use gas, don’t get hot, don’t make noise, do make for exercise, and do cut grass. While most of us persist in cutting grass with labor-saving devices, faithful scythers believe their old-school tool has plenty of life left in it. Just a decade ago, US scythe sales numbered only in the dozens but now they’re nearing 10,000 a year. Predictably, scythe buyers are small, green farmers; unpredictably, they are also city folk and suburbanites. (The downside is, people keep having heart attacks, thinking they’ve seen the Grim Reaper.)
– “Wall Street Journal”

BS CUTTING-EDGE VOCAB:

New terms leaking into our lingo …
• ‘BYOD’ (Bring Your Own Devices) – Describes a job where employees are expected to bring their own equipment, for example a laptop and/or smartphone. (“What a cheap-ass company … no personal days, no overtime, and you gotta BYOD.”)
• ‘Matako’ – Derived from a Swahili word for buttocks, it has come to mean an ample and appealing rear-end. (“Whoa, that chick has a nice matako!”)
• ‘Selfies’ – A photographic self-portrait. Thanks to smartphones’ high-quality built-in cameras  and easy photo-enhancing apps, more ‘selfies’ are being created than ever before, driven by their usage in social media. (It’s arguable the average 20-year-old has had 1,000-times more face shots taken than the average 50-year-old.)

SOD IT ALL:

Since the late 1990s, federal law in Switzerland has required every new building with a suitable roof pitch to have a ‘green roof’, requiring the building’s owner to plant and maintain some kind of natural greenery up there. The law has had a notable effect on appearances as well as temperatures. Standard asphalt rooftops can reach temps of 66 C (150 F), contributing to the ‘urban heat-island effect’, the tendency for cities to be warmer than surrounding areas. But a green roof uses soil and vegetation as insulation, ensuring temperatures only fluctuate mildly. It can reduce heating and cooling costs by up to 20%. (Makes mowing the lawn a lot harder though.)
– CBC.ca

MOST-VISITED SITES ON THE WEB:

The latest Internet site hit-count, which changes monthly …
5. MSN.com … 440 million users.
4. Live.com … 490 million.
3. Yahoo! … 590 million.
2. YouTube … 800 million.
1. Facebook … 880 million.
– Google Ad Planner

HOW TO WATCH YOUR FAVORITE SOAP:

Someday we may be able to watch movies on bubbles, as researchers have developed a new technology to project images on ultra-thin and flexible screens made of … soap film. An international team has produced a system that uses ultrasonic sound waves to alter soap film’s properties and create images. The team says the resulting display is the world’s thinnest transparent screen. If several of the ‘bubble screens’ are put together, viewers can see a 3-D effect or even a holographic projection. (The technology is years away from being available to consumers … sorry to burst your bubble.)
– BBC News

WORDS WITHOUT RHYME:

If you’re a songwriter, try not to finish a line with one of the following or you’re screwed …
✗ Angel
✗ Bulb
✗ Month
✗ Orange
✗ Silver
– Dictionary.com

INVISIBLE INK:

A small Argentine publisher, Eterna Cadencia, has found a way to entice readers to finish its books. It’s created an ink that begins to fade away after only 2 months of interaction with light and air. Is this a gimmicky sales tactic or a creative new means of using technology to make a statement about print books? It may be both … the publisher sold out of its first print run in just 1 day. The disappearing book contains an anthology of works by new Latin American authors. (Attention Hollywood: This technology not recommend for pre-nups.)
– HuffingtonPost.com

HUMAN DETECTION FACTS:
• You can see a candle flame from 50 km (30 mi) on a clear, dark night.
• You can hear the tick of a watch from 6 meters (20 ft) in very quiet conditions.
• You can taste 1 gram of salt in 500 liters (130 gallons) of water.
• You can detect 1 drop of perfume diffused throughout a 3-room apartment.
• You can detect the wing of a bee falling on your cheek from a height of 1 cm (half-inch).
– eBizarre.com

FOR THE RECORD:

‘Lolong’, a man-eating beast feared by locals, has set a Guinness Book of World Records mark as the world’s largest saltwater crocodile in captivity. The giant croc measures 20.24 ft (6.2 m), weighs more than a ton, and is blamed for several deaths before its capture in the southern Philippines town of Bunawan. Since its capture, the lengthy lizard has become the star of a new ecotourism and research center in the town. And while the park has brought in $72,000 in fees since the croc’s debut, most of it has been used for feed and care. (“Time to hire a new zoo attendant … Lolong was hungry.”)
– Yahoo! News

DID YOU KNOW?

In most TV commercials advertising milk, a mixture of white paint and thinner is used.
– MindJunker.com

BS CHRONOMETER 07.04.12


TODAY’S CELEBIRTHDAYS . . .
1982 [30] Mike ‘The Situation’ Sorrentino, Staten Island NY, reality TV personality (“Jersey Shore” since 2009, “The Choice” 2012, “Dancing With the Stars” 2010)

1998 [14] Malia Obama, Chicago IL, US presidential daughter/first offspring of Barack & Michelle Obama

TODAY’S BS REASONS TO PARTY . . .

• “Barbecue Day”, celebrating the time-honored tradition of roasting flesh over an open flame.

• “Country Music Day”, celebrating the roots music movement that began in America some 80 years ago with the advent of the Carter Family and Jimmie Rodgers. Country is actually a mishmash of several other music styles, including traditional folk, Celtic, blues, gospel, hokum, and old-time music. (How come there aren’t any ‘All Hokum’ radio stations?)

• “US Independence Day”, celebrating the country’s declaration of nationhood in 1776. Among the more unusual 4th of July festivals: “Sidewalk Egg-Frying Challenge” in Oatman AZ; “World’s Greatest Lizard Race” in Lovington NM; and the vegan-inspired “Independence from Meat Day”.

TODAY’S MUSIC EVENTS . . .

1982 [30] Black Sabbath frontman Ozzy Osbourne marries Sharon Arden, his manager

2002 [10] Elvis Presley’s remixed “A Little Less Conversation” hits #1, 25 years after his death

TODAY’S FIRSTS . . .

1939 [73] NY Yankees ‘retire’ the 1st baseball uniform (Lou Gehrig’s #4)

1996 [16] ‘HotMail’, the free Internet email service, begins (later bought out by Microsoft)

TODAY’S RECORD . . .

1993 [19] Some 2,000 naked participants attend the “Nude Chili Cookoff” in Devore, California

COMING UP . . .

[Thurs] “Katy Perry: Part of Me” opens in movie theaters
[Thurs] Bikini Day
[Fri] “Savages” opens in movie theaters
[Fri] International Kissing Day
[Fri] Take Your Webmaster to Lunch Day
[Sat] Father-Daughter Take a Walk Together Day
[Sat] International Cherry Pit Spitting Day
This Week Is … Canned Luncheon Meat Week
This Month Is … Cellphone Courtesy Month

BULL’S BITS


BS SIGNS YOU’RE HAVING A BAD DAY:
✗ It costs you more to fill up your car than it did to buy it.
✗ The bird singing outside your window is a vulture.
✗ The gypsy fortune teller offers you a refund.
✗ The Little League team has put your kid on waivers.
✗ Your car payment, house payment, and girlfriend are 3 months overdue.
✗ The worst golfer on the course offers to play you for money.
✗ You compliment the boss on her unusual perfume and find out she isn’t wearing any.
✗ You discover your 8-year-old’s idea of humor is putting Crazy Glue in your Preparation H.
✗ You put both contact lenses in the same eye … twice.
✗ You’ve been at work 3 hours before you notice that your fly is open.

BS PHONE STARTER:

☎ What would make watching a movie at the cinema a better experience? (Noise canceling headphones? Snack bar seat service? Cellphone shield?)

BS WAYS FOLKS IN THE OZARKS ARE CELEBRATING THE 4TH OF JULY:

✓ 3-Legged Race for People Who Actually Have 3 Legs.
✓ How Much Chewin’ Tobacca Can Ya Fit in Yer Mouth Contest.
✓ Pick Your Pa and/or Cousin Out Of a Line-up.
✓ Replace a Broken Car Window With a Glad Bag Race.
✓ Moonshine Dunk Tank.

BS U-PICK TRIVIA:

What kind of tree is most often struck by lightning?
a. Giant Redwood.
b. Royal Palm.
c. Oak. [CORRECT]
– DrBlank.com

BS RANDOM JOKE:

90% of being smart is knowing what you’re dumb at.

BS WATER COOLER QUESTION:

Question: 6-out-of-10 people admit they do THIS while on vacation but not at home.
Answer: Eat dessert.

BS DEEP THOUGHT:

Them that has gits.


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