Wednesday, June 9, 2010        Edition: #4280
Sweet Sheet!


BS SHOW BIZ BUZZ:

Late actor Gary Coleman’s ex-wife, Shannon Price, is set to cash in on his death after allegedly selling a series of photos of him on his hospital deathbed to an unidentified tabloid in a 5-figure deal (we have a new candidate for sleazebag of the year!) . . . Desperate-for-attention former reality TV star Tila Tequila has received a police warning for tweeting bloody pictures suggesting she’d harmed herself, which turned out to be a hoax (is there anyone more pathetic?) . . . Famous person Kim Kardashian is reportedly in talks to replace Angelina Jolie in the “Tomb Raider” movie franchise, a source suggesting it would be a far more comic-strip version, which would be shot in 3D and aimed at a teen audience (who might not care about acting cred) . . . Actress Jane Lynch is backing “Glee” creator Ryan Murphy’s bid to sign up “Britain’s Got Talent” sensation Susan Boyle to make a cameo appearance on the show (playing a ‘Cheerio’?) . . . Movie star Sandra Bullock is attached to an upcoming project that could re-team her with “The Proposal” co-star Ryan Reynolds, an action comedy called “Most Wanted” (has she ever looked hotter than at the “MTV Movie Awards”?) . . . Looks as if “Dexter” has already replaced his dearly departed ‘Rita’, as actress Julia Stiles (‘Jason Bourne’ films) has been cast as a ‘mysterious woman with whom he forms a unique relationship’ in the Showtime series’ upcoming 5th season (watch your back, girl) . . . And legally-challenged starlet Lindsay Lohan has posed for a cavewoman photoshoot in Malibu CA, wearing lingerie and furry UGG boots – to cover up her court-ordered SCRAM ankle bracelet (nice look, next time rubber gum boots?).

TODAY’S SHOW BIZ SKED:
• “CMT Music Awards” (CMT) – Kid Rock hosts the annual fan-voted country music honors from Nashville. Carrie Underwood, Jason Aldean, Lady Antebellum, and Taylor Swift lead nominations with 3 each. Performers include Brad Paisley, Carrie Underwood, Keith Urban w/John Mayer, Lady Antebellum, Miranda Lambert, Tim McGraw, Toby Keith, Zac Brown Band.
• “Jimmy Kimmel Live” (ABC/CityTV) – Massive Attack (“Heligoland”).
• “Late Night With Jimmy Fallon” (NBC/A Channel) – Phish (“Joy”).
• “Late Show With David Letterman” (CBS) – Christina Aguilera (“Bionic”).
• “So You Think You Can Dance” (FOX/CTV) – Part 2 of the Vegas callbacks.
• “Tavis Smiley” (PBS) – Melissa Etheridge (“Fearless Love”).
• “Tonight Show With Jay Leno” (NBC/A Channel) – OK Go (“Of the Blue Colour Of the Sky”).
• “The View” (ABC/CTV) – Harry Connick Jr (“Your Songs”); Jason Derulo (“Jason Derulo”).

BS MUSIC NOTES:

• Alanis Morissette – She’s quietly married 30-year-old rapper Mario ‘MC Souleye’ Treadway’ in a private ceremony for family at her LA home. The nuptials actually occurred 2 weeks ago.
• Bon Jovi – This week they hyped a 12-show residency at London’s O2 arena by playing a promotional mini-show on the facility’s fibreglass roof … 170-feet-high.
• Chris Brown – He’s been forced to postpone the European leg of his “Fan Appreciation Tour” after being denied entry to the UK. It’s believed his application for a work visa was rejected due to his assault conviction stemming from his fight with Rihanna last year.
• George Strait – He’s been named ‘Top Country Artist Of the Past 25 Years’ by “Billboard” magazine. Garth Brooks ranks 2nd on the listing based on charted music, followed by Reba McEntire.
• Journey – Last night on the “Glee” season finalé, ‘New Directions’ performed a medley of their hits.

OFFICE PET PEEVES:

According to a new Ipsos poll, 7-in-8 employees are irritated by something co-workers do. But not many of us are confrontational: Only 29% will actually pipe up to a colleague about what’s bothering us. And if we do, 27% of the offenders will ignore it completely. The top workplace offences that get us ticked off …
• Poor time management skills, like taking excessive breaks and scheduling a meeting that doesn’t have a point. (43%)
• Gossip. (36%)
• Messiness in communal spaces. (25%)
• Loud noises, like loud talking and ringtones. (21%)
• Potent scents, such as perfume and food. (20%)
• Personal electronics. (15%)
• Political conversations. (12%)
• Misuse of email. (12%)
• Personal use of social media. (12%)
And what’s eating you?
– “Men’s Health”

BS BUZZWORDS:
New terms leaking into the lingo …
• ‘Bedizen’ – To adorn, especially in a cheap showy manner. (“When Melissa wants to bedizen herself to totally impress at the club, she adds the crowning touch by dusting herself with gold.”)
• ‘Cheyah’ – An emphatic ‘Yes!’. (“Do I want another beer? Cheyah!”)
• ‘Front Butt’ – An enlarged fatty area just below the stomach that some are inflicted with. (“She has such a front butt on her I couldn’t tell if she was coming or going.”)
• ‘Tar Ball Shot’ – A drink developed by a Grand Isle, Louisiana bar that mixes grape Jell-O and Jagermeister to resemble the toxic sludge that’s currently washing up on the local beach.

UGLY TRUTHS ABOUT MEN:

A few rash generalizations about the male species … true or total BS?
• Men can’t help but stare at other women.
• Men are big kids … and proud of it.
• All guys are pervs. They think about sex 24/7.
• Men would love to cheat … although that doesn’t mean they will.
• They’d like to think they’re slightly smarter than the woman they’re with but have no problem with the woman being 10 times better-looking than them.
• Men don’t take hints. If you want them to get it, say it straight.
• Men want to be thought of as strong, successful, and sexy.
• Most guys consider Valentines Day a ‘chick holiday’.
– Adapted from “Redbook”

NEWS MANAGEMENT:

BP, the company responsible for the oil spill that is already the worst in US history, has purchased several phrases on search engines such as Google and Yahoo so that the first result that shows up directs information seekers to the company’s official website. A simple Google search of the term ‘oil spill’, for instance, turns up several thousand results but the first link, highlighted at the very top of the page, is from BP. A spokesperson for the company has confirmed that BP has, in fact, bought these search terms. (Other terms they might consider buying up: ‘Total Ineptitude’, ‘Greedy Earth Killers’, ‘Massive Screw-up’.)
– ABC News

BS TRUTHS ABOUT SUMMER:
• You will leave for work with styled, straight hair. You will arrive looking like a Chia Pet.
• Day-drinking can be frickin’ awesome, but it can also kick your ass. Because of the Sun and the hot temps, you’ll likely be more dehydrated, making you way more tipsy than usual.
• That gorgeous guy you meet on vacation? He’s probably nothing more than a fun rendezvous. It’s not called a ‘Summer Fling’ because of its long-term potential.
• Do not apply self-tanner or an instant bronzer if you’re going to put on a white dress shortly after. Your dress will stain and the orange-y smudges won’t come out. Ever.
• Somehow, somewhere, Sisqo’s “Thong Song” from Summer 2000 will be heard. Mentally prepare yourself now and you’ll be okay.
• You are not a vampire and do not need to wear your sunglasses indoors. Everyone hates you when you do.
• Summer is short and it will be over before you know it. So enjoy it while you can!
– Excerpted from “Cosmopolitan”

NATURAL HIGH:

Just 20 minutes outdoors can have the same pick-me-up as a cup of coffee because of the instantly energizing powers of nature, according to new research. Whether you’re stuck in the house or are a desk-bound office worker, psychologists say a simple stroll in the open air is as revitalizing as a caffeine-fueled injection. And you don’t even have to do something active to enjoy the benefits. The University of Rochester study has found you become more energized outdoors even if you’re doing nothing. Why? Nature seems to make us feel ‘more alive’. (And if you work outdoors … how do you get your ‘shot of revitalization’ then?)
– “Daily Telegraph”

FOODS YOU SHOULD NEVER BUY AGAIN:

• Gourmet Frozen Vegetables – Make your own by cooking fresh veggies, adding a pat of butter, and sprinkling on some herbs. Far cheaper and far better for you.
• Energy or Protein Bars – They can have high fat and sugar content and are often as caloric as a regular candy bar. They’re also 2-to-3 times more expensive.
• Spice Mixes – Check the label. The first ingredient you’re likely to see is salt, followed by the vague listing ‘herbs & spices’. Make your own custom combos and save a fortune.
• Bottled Water – It’s expensive compared to what’s coming out of the tap; and its cost to the environment is also high, thanks to transportation and plastic packaging.
• Salad Kits – Washed & bagged greens with trimmings can cost 3 times that of a homemade salad. Buy fresh veggies, make your own croutons, mix your own dressing, and save big time.
• Individual Servings of Anything – The cost per unit of these items is significantly more than if you buy one large package and parcel out single servings in reusable storage bags.
• Frozen Burgers – Far more expensive than making your own. There’s also evidence that pre-formed meat patties can contain more e-coli than regular ground meat.
– Condensed from “Reader’s Digest”

BS AMAZING FACTS:
• As of this week, the Afghanistan war is the longest war in US history, surpassing the Vietnam Conflict by a month, lasting 104 months (8.6 years) … so far.
– ABCNews.go.com
• Under a new proposal tabled in the European Parliament, every single Google web search would be stored for up to 2 years for potential use in criminal investigations against pedophiles.
– DailyMail.co.uk

BS CHRONOMETER 06.09.10


TODAY’S CELEBIRTHDAYS . . .
1961 [49] Michael J Fox, Edmonton AB, movie actor (“Back To the Future” series)/ex-TV actor (“Spin City” 1996-2000) who quit his hit sitcom to launch the Michael J Fox Foundation for Parkinson’s Research after being diagnosed with the syndrome

1963 [47] Johnny Depp, Owensboro KY, movie star (“Alice in Wonderland”, “Pirates Of the Caribbean” films)  COMING UP: “The Rum Diary”, based on the Hunter S Thompson novel, opening in September.

1978 [32] Matthew Bellamy, Oxford UK, rock guitarist/keyboardist/vocalist (Muse-“Resistance”, “Uprising”)

1978 [32] Michaela Conlin, Allentown PA, TV actress (‘Angela Montenegro’ on “Bones” since 2005)

1981 [29] Natalie Portman (Hershlag), Jerusalem, Israel, movie actress (“Mr Magorium’s Wonder Emporium”, “Cold Mountain”)  COMING UP: The comic book thriller “Thor”, in 2011.

TODAY’S BS REASONS TO PARTY . . .

• “Donald Duck Day”, marking the cartoon character’s debut on this day in 1934 as a bit player in the Walt Disney cartoon “The Little Wise Hen”.

• “Strawberry Rhubarb Pie Day”, honoring the popular pie that mixes the sweet and the tart. Nummers!

THIS DAY IN SHOW BIZ . . .
2006 [04] Official ‘first pics’ of Shiloh Nouvel Jolie-Pitt appear in “People” magazine in North America (for $4.1-million), “Hello!” magazine in Britain/Spain, and in Australia’s “New Idea”

TODAY’S FIRSTS . . .
1899 [111] 1st ‘Moving Staircase’ built (forerunner of the ‘Escalator’)

1923 [87] 1st ‘Armored Car’ is introduced by the Brinks Co (leads directly to ‘heist movies’)

TODAY’S RECORD . . .

1993 [17] Last Canadian team to win the Stanley Cup as Montréal Canadiens beat LA Kings 4 games to 1 for their record 24th championship

AND REMEMBER . . .
[Thurs] CMA Music Festival Fan Fair 2010 begins (Nashville)
[Thurs] FIFA World Cup Kick-Off Celebration Concert (Johannesburg)
[Thurs] “Rush: Beyond the Lighted Stage” opens in movie theaters
[Thurs] Nursing Assistants Day
[Thurs] Iced Tea Day
[Fri] “The A-Team”; “The Karate Kid” open in movie theaters
[Fri] Corn On the Cob Day
This Week Is … Carp Week
This Month Is … Perennial Gardening Month

BULL’S BITS


BS MANSPEAK DICTIONARY:
What guys say [what they really mean] …
• “It’s a guy thing.” [“There is no rational thought pattern connected with it, and you have no chance at all of making it logical.”]
• “Can I help with dinner?” [“Why isn't it already on the table?”]
• “It would take too long to explain.” [“I have no idea how it works.”]
• “Take a break, honey, you’re working too hard.” [“I can't hear the game over the vacuum cleaner.”]
• “That’s interesting, dear.” [“Are you still talking?”]
• “I just cut myself, it’s no big deal.” [“I’ve actually severed a limb, but will bleed to death before I admit I'm hurt.”]
• “You look terrific.” [“Please don't try on one more outfit. I'm starving.”]
• “Uh huh,” “Sure, honey,” or “Yes, dear.” [Absolutely nothing. It's a conditioned response.]

BS RANDOM JOKE:
Jogging helps you forget your problems by allowing you to focus on physical pain.

BS PHONE STARTER:
Which perk of your job is most important to you? (Among those mentioned in a recent “USA Today” poll: Free soft drinks, casual dress days, free tea/coffee, free snacks, and doughnuts for meetings.)

BS FINISH LINES:

Ask a phone contestant (kids work great!) to complete the following sayings …
• Absence makes the heart [grow fonder.]
• It’ll cost you an arm and … [a leg.]
• An eye for an eye … [a tooth for a tooth.]
• As cool as … [a cucumber.]
• As dead as a … [a nail.]
• As fit as a … [a fiddle.]
• As good as … [gold.]
• As happy as … [a lark.]
• As old as the … [the hills.]
• Ashes to ashes … [dust to dust.]
– Adapted from Braingle.com

BS WEB GOODIE:
You can put your ‘Face in Space’ for free! NASA is enabling you to upload a photo to be carried aboard the final Space Shuttle mission. For some reason, you must be at least 13-years-old.
NET: http://faceinspace.nasa.gov/index.aspx

BS WATER COOLER QUESTION:
Today’s Question: Psychologists have found that happy people do THIS more than unhappy people – 70% more in fact.
Answer to Give Out Next Show: Talk.

BS DEEP THOUGHT:
Experience is the worst teacher; it gives the test before presenting the lesson.


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