Tuesday, June 5, 2007        Edition: #3546
If the Sheet Fits, Buy It!

BS SHOW BIZ BUZZ:
TODAY divorced actors Alec Baldwin & Kim Basinger are scheduled to go another round in court over that leaked voicemail of Baldwin berating their 11-year-old daughter Ireland (you know, the “rude, thoughtless little pig”) . . . TONIGHT is the “Canadian Idol” season premiere (CTV) which features the best & worst auditions from Toronto, Ottawa, Calgary, Winnipeg, St John’s, and Halifax (can you take another 13 weeks of Ben Mulroney?) . . . TONIGHT the ‘Oscars of the Internet’, the 11th annual “ Webby Awards” are presented in NYC by the International Academy of Digital Arts & Sciences, including some 70 awards for the likes of David Bowie (‘Lifetime Achievement’), eBay’s Meg Whitman, YouTube co-founders Chad Hurley & Steve Chen, and the ‘Artist of the Year’ award for the Beastie Boys concert film, “Awesome, I F–ing Shot That”, which uses footage shot by audience members on handheld cameras . . . TONIGHT the 2007 “Alma Awards” for Latino artistic achievement air from Pasadena CA (ABC), hosted by Eva Longoria & Mario Lopez and featuring performances by Prince, Los Lonely Boys, and War (as the awards were pre-recorded, we already know the movie “Babel” and TV series “Ugly Betty” are the big winners with 4 apiece) . . . The Zimmers, a group of old-age pensioners trying to prove that seniors can still rock, are getting attention on the airwaves in Britain with a cover of The Who’s hit “My Generation”, which takes on whole new meaning when the frontman is over 90-years-old (NET: http://tinyurl.com/yuejv3) . . . TONIGHT Simon Cowell’s summer reality TV production “America’s Got Talent 2“ debuts (NBC), with Jerry Springer taking over as host and Sharon Osbourne replacing Brandy Norwood on the judging panel (always working both sides of the pond, Cowell’s also introducing “Britain’s Got Talent” THIS SUMMER) . . . TONIGHT the 3rd season of “Kathy Griffin: My Life on the D-List” debuts (Bravo), with comedian – and cosmetic surgery junky – Kathy Griffin hitting the dating scene as a recent divorcée . . . Newly unemployed TV personality Rosie O’Donnell will release her  long-delayed memoir, “Celebrity Detox”, THIS FALL which promises a candid look at her very public life, including her brief, battling stint on “The View” . . . And “Hustler” magazine publisher Larry Flynt is offering up to $1 million to anyone who can document an affair with a current member of the US Congress or a high-ranking government official (a stunt he’s pulled twice before), provided, that is, that he chooses to publish the story (the ‘hotline’ number to call is 1-800-251-2714).

BS MUSIC NOTES:
• Arctic Monkeys – They’ve confirmed that fan favorite “Fluorescent Adolescent” will be the next single from their album “Favourite Worst Nightmare”.
• Big & Rich – TODAY their new album “Between Raising Hell & Amazing Grace” is released, featuring some odd concoctions like a guest appearance by Wyclef Jean (“Please Man”) and a cover version of AC/DC’s “You Shook Me All Night Long”.
• Bruce Springsteen – TODAY he releases “Bruce Springsteen With The Seeger Sessions Band Live In Dublin”, a 23-track live recording from a 3-night stand in Ireland LAST NOVEMBER. The package includes a concert DVD, Blu-ray disc, and a 2-CD set.
• Nirvana – Audiotapes of Kurt Cobain’s voice were used to make the documentary film “Kurt Cobain – About a Son”, scheduled for theatrical release THIS FALL. The soundtrack (due SEPTEMBER 11th) includes music by REM, David Bowie, Iggy Pop, and Death Cab For Cutie’s Ben Gibbard.
• Patti Smith – TONIGHT ‘punk rock’s poet laureate’ guests on “Late Late Show With Craig Ferguson” (CBS).
• Rihanna – TONIGHT she performs “Umbrella” on the “Tonight Show With Jay Leno” (NBC/A Channel).
• Satellite Party – TONIGHT former Jane’s Addiction frontman Perry Farrell’s new band plays “Late Night With David Letterman” (CBS).
• Tim McGraw & Faith Hill – TONIGHT their 35-date “Soul2Soul 2007” tour kicks off at the Qwest Center in Omaha NE. It will include 9 shows in Canada. Among the supporting acts hopping on & off the bus will be Taylor Swift, whose first hit single was … “Tim McGraw”.
• Also being released TODAY: The 2-CD retrospective “Monterey International Pop Festival”, a 40th anniversary look-back at the landmark 1967 music festival; “Anchored In Love: A Tribute to June Carter Cash”, an all-star tribute album from the likes of Elvis Costello, Emmylou Harris, Carlene Carter, Sheryl Crow, and Willie Nelson; and Paul McCartney’s “Memory Almost Full”, the first release from Starbucks’ new Hear Music label.

TODAY’S VIDEO RELEASES:
• “The Messengers” ( Horror Thriller ): After a city family moves to North Dakota to farm sunflowers, a mysterious drifter shows up on the doorstep and sets off a series of suspicious circumstances that threaten to tear them apart. Stars Dylan McDermott, Penelope Ann Miller & Kristen Stewart. Shot entirely in Regina and Indian Head SK.
• “Norbit” ( Romantic Comedy ): Eddie Murphy stars as a mild-mannered guy who meets the girl of his dreams (“Crash” hottie Thandie Newton), but to be with her he needs to first dump his extremely huge fiancée, also played by Murphy in a fat-suit and in drag. As in “The Nutty Professor”, Murphy also suits up in several other roles.
• Also released TODAY: “The Best of Chappelle’s Show: Uncensored”; “Fantastic Four (Extended Edition)”; “Rescue Me: The Complete 3rd Season”; and “Seinfeld – The Complete 8th Season”.

SUMMER 2007 COVER-UP:
Women of the world rejoice! This is not the season of the skimpy swimsuit because restrained swimwear is back in style. The retro trend really took off with the Spring collections from Stella McCartney, Karl Lagerfeld, and Prada who unveiled 1950s-inspired creations that include full-cut bikinis, tunics, turban headgear, bloomer bottoms, ‘sweetheart necklines’ and ample ‘boy-cut’ briefs. Analysts say it reflects a renewed interest in ‘getting dressed’, even for the pool. It’s about returning the mystery to fashion by not letting it all hang out. How did this ever happen in our bare-it-all pop culture? (We’re guessing unsavory pics of trashy Britney Spears helped.)
– “Los Angeles Times”

BEWARE OF ROLLER SHOES:
Those trendy wheeled sneakers that let kids zip around sidewalks, playgrounds and malls
have become the latest safety hazard du jour. It’s called ‘heeling’ (named after the most popular brand, Heelys), and the wheeled shoes are sold in some 70 countries. But now doctors from Ireland to Singapore are reporting an upswing in broken wrists, arms and ankles; dislocated elbows; and even cracked skulls, all attributable to the craze. In most cases, none of the victims were wearing protective gear. (Oh no, yet another activity requiring a helmet.)
– AP

DICTION DEBUT:
THIS WEEK the new 9th edition of the “Collins English Dictionary” is being published, including several new words and terms. Among them …
• ‘Brainfood’ … foods thought to benefit brain function.
• ‘Gitmo’ … shorthand for the US base at Guantanamo Bay, Cuba.
• ‘Hoodie’ …. slang for a hooded sweatshirt.
• ’Pro-Ana’ … the label for those who consider anorexia a valid lifestyle choice.
• ‘Size Zero’ … fashion parlance for a very small dress.
– BBC News

GET SKINNY & DIE:
The fad for low-carbohydrate, high-protein diets could be putting lives at risk, dieticians say. A new study in the “European Journal of Clinical Nutrition” has found that prolonged adherence to lo-carb diets is associated with a higher mortality rate, particularly from cardiovascular problems and cancers. One reason is that cutting carbs results in also cutting back on important nutrients, including B vitamins and iron. Another is that foods marketed as ‘lo-carb’ or ‘lo-fat’ often contain large amounts of sugar. One critic notes that we should always remember fad diets are usually hatched by someone trying to make a fat wad of cash. (Except for the ‘Give Your Head a Shake and Eat Sensible Stuff’ diet.)
– “Dominion Post”

HOPPING TO CONCLUSIONS:
Archeologists in the Czech Republic claim to have discovered that frog legs – a delicacy most commonly associated with the French – were in fact a Czech dish first. The evidence comes from excavations of a hill fort east of Prague, where kitchen remains were recently unearthed that suggest Czechs were eating frog legs as a delicacy more than 5,000 years ago. Most of the artifacts found were fossilized hind legs of male frogs, which have the most meat and are most commonly eaten. (They also found fossils of what seem to be legless amphibians selling pencils.)
– UPI

MORE SUFFERING FOR SINGLE MOMS:
Overweight and/or single moms are more likely to breed chubby children, new Australian research has found. A study published in the “Medical Journal of Australia” shows that a mother’s weight and marital status have more influence on childhood obesity than her parenting style. Researchers say the association between children’s weight and the maternal BMI (Body Mass Index) confirms the need to find ways for single-parent families to combat obesity. (Hey, when you’ve worked all day and come home to flake out on the sofa, odds are you’re gonna share that crate of Doritos with your 3 kids.)
–AAP

AVERAGE LIFESPAN OF APPLIANCES:
A review of the average useful life of household appliances …
• 20 years – refrigerator, freezer
• 18 years – electric stove, clothes dryer
• 15 years – room air conditioner
• 13 years – clothes washer
• 12 years – central air, dishwasher
• 10 years – TV, smoke detector, microwave oven, garbage disposal
• 8 years – vacuum cleaner
• 6 years – clock radio, VCR
• 4 years – answering machine, computer
The jury is still out on newer techno-gadgets such as Blackberries, plasma TVs, DVRs, and game platforms like Xbox. (If they run true to form, they’ll last precisely 1 day longer than their warranties.)
– “Realty Times”

BS SHOCKING FACT:
Women own less than 15% of land worldwide.
– “State of World Population 2007”

THE BULL SHEET 06.05.07

TODAY’S CELEBIRTHDAYS . . .
1956 [51] Kenny G (Gorelick), Seattle WA, smooth jazz saxophonist (“By the Time This Night is Over”, “Breathless”)

1969 [38] Brian McKnight, Buffalo NY, pop/R&B singer/songwriter (“Anytime”, “Back at One”)

1971 [36] Mark Wahlberg, Dorchester MA, movie actor (“The Departed”, “The Italian Job”)  COMING UP: “The Brazilian Job”, expected in 2009.

1977 [30] Navi Rawat, Malibu CA, TV actress (‘Amita Ramanujan’ on “Numb3rs” since 2005)

1977 [30] Liza Weil, LA CA, TV actress (‘Paris Geller’ on “Gilmore Girls” 2000-07)

1979 [28] Pete Wentz, Wilmette IL, rock bassist/singer (Fall Out Boy-“Thnks fr th Mmrs”, “This Ain’t a Scene, It’s an Arms Race”)

1981 [26] Sébastien Lefebvre, Montréal QC, rock guitarist (Simple Plan- “Untitled [How Can This Happen To Me?]”, “Welcome to My Life”)

TODAY’S BS REASONS TO PARTY . . .
• “Gingivitis Week in Canada”. It’s estimated that 3 out of 4 Canadians suffer from the gum disease, but only 6% know it.
NET: http://www.gingivitis.ca/en/

• “International Attitude Day”, honoring those who know who they are, what they stand for, and aren’t afraid to assert themselves to maintain their identity (aka ‘Pushy People Day’).

• “National Hunger Awareness Day”, the 6th annual observance initiated by the organization America’s Second Harvest to encourage us to donate to an online food drive. Donations are identified by zip code so that they benefit local food banks in your community.
NET: http://www.secondharvest.org/news_room/hungerday/index.html

• “Shut Up Day”, a day to give quiet people a chance to talk. Perhaps a backlash to the above?

• “UN World Environment Day”, as declared annually since 1972. THIS YEAR’s theme is climate change and the slogan is ‘Melting Ice – A Hot Topic!’. Clever, huh?
NET: http://www.unep.org/wed/2007/english/

THIS DAY IN SHOW BIZ . . .
1998 [09] Steamy TV series “Sex & the City” debuts (HBO), starring Sarah Jessica Parker

TODAY’S FIRSTS . . .
1907 [100] 1st ‘Automatic Washer & Dryer’

1967 [40] 1st ‘NHL Expansion’ announced, adding 6 new American teams for 1967-68 season

1977 [30] 1st ‘Personal Computer’ (Apple II)

1989 [18] 1st MLB game in a ‘Convertible Stadium’ (Milwaukee Brewers beat Blue Jays 5-3 at Toronto’s new ‘Skydome’ featuring a retractable roof)

TODAY’S RECORD . . .
1988 [19] ‘Longest Champagne Cork Flight’ record set at 177 feet, 9 inches in NYC

AND REMEMBER . . .
[Wed] Couple Appreciation Day
[Thurs] 2007 Songwriters Hall of Fame Gala (NYC)
[Thurs] 35th AFI Life Achievement Award (Los Angeles)
[Thurs] Chocolate Ice Cream Day
[Thurs-Sun] 36th CMA Music Festival
[Fri] Name Your Poison Day
[Fri] Take a Kid Fishing Weekend
This Week Is … Canadian Environment Week / Headache Awareness Week
This Month Is … International Accordion Awareness Month

BULL’S BITS

BS ETIQUETTE TIPS:
• Do not lay rubber while traveling in a funeral procession.
• Never take a beer to a job interview.
• If you have to vacuum the bed, it is time to change the sheets.
• Even if you’re certain that you are included in the will, it’s considered tacky to drive a U-Haul to the funeral home.
• Men need space in the bathroom cabinet too, and always remember – his razor is his.
• When drinking directly out of a wine bottle, always hold it so your fingers cover the label.
• Your dinner table centerpiece should never be anything prepared by a taxidermist.
• While ears need to be cleaned regularly, this is a job that should be done in private using one’s OWN truck keys.
• Livestock is usually a poor choice for a wedding gift.

BS PROMOTION:
This would make a great stunt for a local fair or festival: More than 50 Chihuahuas ran in the “Seguin-Guadalupe County Hispanic Chamber of Commerce Chihuahua Races” on the weekend in Texas. Not all of the tiny toy dogs made it to the finish line. In fact, some didn’t even make it out of the starting gate. The races were part of the annual “Fiesta Juan Seguin”.
– “San Antonio Express-News”

BS PHONE STARTER:
What’s your favorite season of the year and why? (A “Dreamscape” poll finds Autumn is the fave, preferred by 38%. Spring’s next at 28%, then Summer 26% and Winter 8%.)

BS WATER COOLER QUESTION:
Today’s Question: If you wear jeans to work, chances are you do more of THIS than people who wear suits.
Answer to Give Out Next Show: Walking.

BS DEEP THOUGHT:
You can’t win them all but you can sure lose them all.


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