Thursday, June 1, 2006        Edition: #3296
You Really Know Your Sheet!

TODAY, on what would have been screen legend Marilyn Monroe’s 80th birthday, a newly discovered & remastered recording of her singing a tune called “Down Boy” is being released (can you picture her as 80?) . . . Meantime, a new lawsuit claims numerous items in a purported Marilyn Monroe exhibit aboard the permanently docked Queen Mary in Long Beach CA have no connection to her whatsoever, meaning patrons are being fraudulently bilked out of $22.95 for admission (oh look, an authentic Marilyn dust ball from under her bed!) . . . TONIGHT & tomorrow ABC-TV is following in the footsteps of Global-TV’s “CanSpell National Spelling Bee” by airing the 78th “National Spelling Bee” from Washington DC (in previous years it was on ESPN – the sports network!) . . . Actress Michelle Rodriguez has been released from jail after serving just 4 hours, 20 minutes of her 60-day sentence for violating probation, thanks to overcrowding at the LA County Jail (and a warden who watches “Lost”) . . . The chess-game of TV news anchors continues, the latest rumor saying Diane Sawyer will leave ABC News for CNN by next year (when she’ll turn 62) . . . Just a month after she was dropped as the face of Christian Dior makeup, actress Julia Roberts has signed on as spokesmodel for cosmetic company Avon in a deal reportedly worth $2-to-$4 million (but will she have to go door-to-door?) . . . “TV Guide”, which has been attempting to reverse years of declining readership, will attach a DVD to the covers of 700,000 copies of its next issue, featuring clips of 17 new and returning summer shows that the editors recommend . . . Brangelina’s blabby obstetrician informs us that Brad Pitt cut new daughter Shiloh’s umbilical cord (fortunately, he was bright enough to wait until after she was born) . . . Genghis Khan, the notoriously ruthless 13th-century conqueror, is being celebrated in Mongolia’s first rock opera, which takes pains to show his ‘softer side’ as a good son, husband & friend (what are they calling it – “Springtime for Ghengis”?).

• Beyoncé – Her 2nd solo album, “B’Day”, will fittingly be released worldwide on her 25th birthday, SEPTEMBER 4th, except for North America where it launches a day later due to Labor Day.
• Daniel Powter – TONIGHT he performs on the “Tonight Show With Jay Leno” (NBC).
• Foo Fighters – Frontman Dave Grohl is baffled by a recent online rumor saying he’d died. He only discovered it after listening to a sympathy message for his wife left by a friend on voicemail.
• KT Tunstall – The Brit pop singer denies she’s gay but admits she finds kissing girls ‘fun’. But she’d never go out with a girl, she says, because they’re ‘high maintenance’.
• Matchbox Twenty – They’ve donated $200,000 to restore music education programs in areas affected by Hurricane Katrina. Frontman Rob Thomas will also raise money for the program throughout his upcoming solo summer tour.
• Michael Bolton – TODAY he guests on “The View” (ABC).
• Radiohead – TONIGHT they kick off a North American tour in Philadelphia PA. They promise to showcase new material even though they aren’t releasing a new album this year.

• “Bangkok Dangerous” – Nicolas Cage will star in a Hollywood remake of this 1999 Hong Kong gangster thriller. It starts shooting in Thailand in AUGUST.
• “Citizen Brando” – The film Marlon Brando was making at the time of his death in 2004 is being revived by its director, Ridha Behi. Originally the story of a Tunisian boy who travels to the US in hope of meeting Brando, it will now be reconstructed as part fiction, part documentary. And further adding mayhem to the mix, Christopher Walken has just been added to the cast.
• “Gone, Baby, Gone” – Ben Affleck is making his directorial debut with this mystery about a missing 4-year-old that’s now shooting in Cambridge MA. The responsibility of helming a major motion picture doesn’t come without headaches – on the weekend Ben was treated in a hospital ER for a massive migraine.
• “I’m Not There” – Inspired by the life & music of Bob Dylan, this film will make use of 7 actors to embody various aspects his life and work, including Oscar-nominated couple Heath Ledger & Michelle Williams, Julianne Moore, Richard Gere, and Cate Blanchett … as a young Dylan. Filming begins in Romania this JULY.
• “Lust, Caution” – Oscar-winning “Brokeback Mountain” director Ang Lee’s next effort is this Chinese-language espionage film set in World War 2-era Shanghai. The screenplay is by “Crouching Tiger, Hidden Dragon” writer Wang Hui-Ling. Production begins this Autumn.
• “Shake Hands With the Devil” – Québec actor Roy Dupuis, who played hockey icon Maurice Richard in the recent bio-film, is taking on the role of Romeo Dallaire in the movie adaptation of the former Canadian general’s gripping memoir about the Rwandan genocide. The movie will be directed by Roger Spottiswoode (“Tomorrow Never Dies”) when filming begins in Kigali, Rwanda later THIS MONTH.

A few tips to lessen the chances of having your luggage misplaced or lost by an airline …
• Get a sturdy ID tag that fits tightly to your bag and includes your cellphone number. Put the same info – and your itinerary – on the inside of each bag.
• Plan to check all bags a minimum of 90 minutes before departure to make sure they get aboard the aircraft.
• Consider using UPS or Fedex to ship luggage to your destination so that it’s there when you arrive.
• Instead of 1 large bag, pack 2 smaller ones with a complete outfit in each. That way, if one bag is misplaced, you still have something to wear. If 2 or more people are traveling, pack a change of clothing for each person in each bag.

A BS breakdown of who we are and what we do …
• 93% of Americans eat pizza at least once a month.
• 67% of men own a cookbook but only 49% have ever used it.
• 60% of pet owners have used their pet’s name as a computer password.
• 48% of women say their boss has made them cry.
• 34% of women call their mothers almost every day.
• 21% of us have bought a product advertised through spam e-mail.
• 20% of Canadians aged 22-to-26 still live in their parents’ home.

• Social workers in Lower Saxony, Germany had a delicate situation to deal with after being summoned by a worried mother to speak to her daughter about ‘loose morals’. They ended up telling the mom that her daughter’s love life was none of their business. After all, the ‘girl’ turned out to be 68-years-old … the mom 92!
• A 2-month-old Chinese boy known as ‘Jie-jie’ was born with 1 right arm and 2 left arms, which do not seem fully functional. His Shanghai surgeons must now decide which left arm to remove, and at this point, they aren’t sure which will be the one to go. Either way, it’s a ‘Farewell to Arm’.
• A surgeon cut off 4 of his own fingers to cash in on a $2.5-million insurance policy, a German court has heard. Dr Manfred Tauber of Zehdenick claims he was cutting down a tree with his wife, who slipped and severed his fingers with a chainsaw. But insurance investigators found no traces of his DNA on the saw and say the cuts are too precise to have been caused by it. Now he’s facing up to 10 years in the slammer … for some of his best work!

HMV is launching what it claims will be the first service allowing customers to buy CDs and DVDs on their cellphones via text message. The new service ‘Txt2Buy’ will launch after test marketing is completed in about 3 months. Customers will text their product choices to a short-code number, after which they’ll receive a cellphone Internet link to a secure site where they can enter credit card and delivery details. (It’s so painful getting off the couch to shop, isn’t it?)
– “Wired”

Bored with the idea of spending a week camping in a national park? Then how about …
• Freezing Your Noo-Noo: Quark Expeditions visits the geographic North Pole twice each summer using the Russian icebreaker ‘Yamal’. After a week of smashing ice, some as thick as 20 feet, guests are treated to a BBQ at 90 degrees N latitude. You can also take the optional ‘polar plunge’. Heart stopping excitement … literally.
• Losing Weight … Temporarily: Space Adventures offers a MiG-25 Foxbat ride from Moscow to the edge of space, some 85,000 feet up. At that altitude, you can see both the blackness of space and the curvature of the Earth. You’ll also reach a speed of Mach 2.5, covering a mile every 2 seconds.
• Turning Left at 160 mph: The Mario Andretti Racing School allows amateurs to drive 500-hp, open-wheel race cars at 6 different US speedways. It’s as close as you can get to being in the “Indy 500″. Not cheap, though. The ‘World Champion’ program of 66 laps costs $2,999.
– “Forbes Magazine”

“Grey’s Anatomy” star Patrick Dempsey (‘Dr Derek Shepherd) is a co-owner of the Indycar racing team Vision Racing.

A prof at the UK’s Bradford University has abolished traditional lectures in favor of podcasts, which can be downloaded onto MP3 players, cellphones or computers. Dr Bill Ashraf, a senior lecturer in microbiology, hopes students will watch or listen to virtual lectures in their own time, and ask questions via text message, which will then be answered on his blog. (The final exam will be in the form of a video game on PSP 2.)
– “The Guardian”

Shipping heiress Athina Onassis Roussel has failed in an attempt to take control of her late grandfather Aristotle Onassis’ trust. The 21-year-old inherited half of the Greek magnate’s fortune, estimated at $2.7 billion, when she was 18. The other half went to the Onassis Foundation, which is based in Liechtenstein. Her quest to take over the foundation was unsuccessful, apparently because she failed to follow through on promises in her initial bid. Among them – learning to be more ‘Greek’. She’s lived in Brazil most of her life. (Now she’ll have to struggle on, cutting expenses … such as the odd airliner or hotel.) 


1937 [69] Morgan Freeman, Memphis TN, movie actor (Academy Award-“Million Dollar Baby”)  FACTOID: He’s one of the hardest working actors in Hollywood, with 11 films lined up for 2006-07.

1947 [59] Ron Wood, Hillingdon UK, rock guitarist (Rolling Stones since 1975)/Rock & Roll Hall of Fame (1989)  FACTOID: He’s the one who can climb a coconut palm without falling on his head.

1953 [53] Ronnie Dunn, Coleman TX, country singer/guitarist (Brooks & Dunn-“Building Bridges”)

1969 [37] Teri Polo, Dover DE, movie actress (‘Pam Byrnes’ in “Meet the Fockers” & “Meet the Parents”)/TV actress (‘Helen Santos’ in “The West Wing” 2005-06)

1973 [33] Heidi Klum [pronounced ‘kloom’], Bergisch-Gladbach, Germany, TV host (“Project Runway”)/fashion model who wed singer Seal in 2005

1974 [32] Alanis Morissette, Ottawa ON, pop singer whose “Jagged Little Pill” album sold close to 30 million copies worldwide

• “Atlantic, Caribbean & Gulf Hurricane Season” begins and continues through November 30th. THIS YEAR the US National Oceanic & Atmospheric Administration is predicting a very active season with 13-to-16 named storms, 8-to-10 of them becoming hurricanes, of which 4-to-6 could become Category 3 storms or higher. Last year’s numbers – 28 named storms, 15 hurricanes, 7 major hurricanes, including ‘Katrina’. Hurricanes are named in order from alphabetical lists. Check this year’s possible names here …

• “Early Bird Day”, a day to get up bright and early … if you like worms.

• “Flip a Coin Day”, honoring the decision-making practice begun by none other than Julius Caesar (who was the original ‘head’ on the head’s side). The coin flip was used in serious litigation involving property, marriage and even criminal guilt.

• “Healthcare Executives Appreciation Day”, honoring the people who make HUGE salaries off our illnesses.

• “National Spelling Bee” in Washington DC through TOMORROW. After airing for 12 years on sports channel ESPN and recently getting the sports-movie-like treatment in “Akeela & the Bee”, this year’s 78th annual finals are moving to ABC-TV. (“Good job on the word ‘Desperate’, Jason! Now can you spell ‘Grey’s Anatomy’?”)

• “New Year’s Resolution Recommitment Day”, a chance to revisit all those promises you made to yourself New Year’s Day and then promptly forgot by January 3rd.

• “Stand For Children Day”, begun in 1996 as a nonprofit organization that helps people who care about children come together to advocate concrete, lasting changes that improve kids’ lives. Yeah, how about edible Play-Doh? Peanut butter-flavored.

1938 [68] “Superman”, is born on the pages of  Action Comics, created by Jerry Siegel & Toronto-born artist Joe Shuster

1835 [171] Kingston ON Penitentiary opens (no one’s ever called it ‘Club Fed’, it’s arguably Canada’s most creepy)

1909 [97] ‘Grey Cup’ donated to Canadian football, by Governor-General Lord Grey

1996 [10] Florida Panthers make it to Stanley Cup final in fewest seasons for any NHL expansion club (just 3)

1495 [511] Friar John Cor distills 1st ever vat of ‘Scotch Whiskey’ (he comes up for air 6 times)

1880 [126] 1st ‘Public Phone Booth’ is installed, in New Haven CT (are there any left anywhere?)

1938 [68] 1st ‘Baseball Helmets’ worn by batters (Springfield Greys vs House of David in NYC)

1908 [98] John Krohn decides to walk the perimeter of the USA — with his wheelbarrow (competes the 9,024-mile trek in 357 days, using 11 pairs of shoes, 112 pair of socks and 5 wheels for the wheelbarrow)

[Fri] Rocky Road Ice Cream Day
[Fri] Doughnut Day
[Fri] Cancer Survivors Day
[Fri] “The Break-Up” opens in movie theaters
[Fri-Sat] Shavuot (Jewish)
[Sat] Canada’s Walk of Fame 2006 Induction Gala
[Sat] MTV Movie Awards (airing JUNE 8)
[Sun] International Mothers’ Peace Day
[Mon] UN World Environment Day
This Week Is . . . Canadian Safe Kids Week Step-Parents Week
This Month Is . . . Fight the Filthy Fly Month (wash your jeans!)

• You often switch from heat to AC … in the same day.
• You know several drivers who have hit deer … more than once.
• You take a down comforter with you … to go camping.
• You carry jumper cables in your car … and your girlfriend knows how to use them.
• You think winter driving is better because the potholes are filled.
• You’re familiar with all 4 seasons: winter, winter, winter … and construction.
• You measure driving distance in hours.

According to the American Podiatric Medical Association, here are the top towns with the best places to walk, based on safety, climate and attractions …
5. Las Vegas, Nevada
4. Boise City, Idaho
3. Madison, Wisconsin
2. Colorado Springs, Colorado
1. Portland, Oregon
– “Prevention” magazine.

Tubby or not tubby, fat is the question!

Today’s Question: Over the past 24 years, THIS person has walked over 443 miles on TV.
Answer to Give Out Next Show: Vanna White on “Wheel of Fortune”.

Behind every successful woman is – herself.

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