Friday, June 28, 2019 – Edition: #6483
Thanks For Being a Bull Market!
BS SUBSCRIBER NOTE:
There’ll be no “BS” service for Monday July 1 to observe the Canada Day holiday. All subscribers will receive credit for the missed service day. The Bull Sheet will resume publication on Tuesday, July 2.
BS SHOW BIZ BUZZ:
★ The biggest film of the year is back in theatres this weekend. Marvel says the re-release of “Avengers: Endgame” will include a video introduction by directors Joe and Anthony Russo, an unfinished deleted scene, and a special sneak peek of the upcoming “Spiderman Far From Home.” The special edition will run three-hours, eight-minutes and include a tribute to the late comic-book creator Stan Lee. Fans in select theatres will also get a special poster. “Endgame” has so far earned $2.74 billion, and by the end of the weekend, it could surpass the all-time box office record of $2.78 billion record set by “Avatar.”
★ “Monty Python” will release previously-unheard material for their 50th anniversary. The celebrated comedy troupe – comprising John Cleese, Terry Gilliam, Eric Idle, Terry Jones, Michael Palin, and the late Graham Chapman – have a number of events planned to mark the occasion, including five new radio specials, the release of all 45 episodes of “Monty Python’s Flying Circus”, on Blu-ray and DVD, fully restored for the first time ever, and the album “Monty Python Sings (Again)” will be released for the first time on double vinyl including the ‘Stephen Hawking sings Monty Python…Galaxy Song’ track for the first time.
★ Beth Chapman was taping alongside Duane “Dog” Chapman almost until her last day, but there’s some unfinished work to be done … and now it’s in Dog’s hands to decide how their project will end. Their new show, “Dog’s Most Wanted,” had been shooting for several months, and they were coming to a close last weekend, according to production sources. Beth suffered a choking emergency Saturday at their home in Hawaii and was placed in a medically-induced coma, but she never recovered and died Wednesday morning.
★ Max Wright, best known for playing patriarch Willie Tanner on the sitcom “Alf,” died Wednesday after years of battling cancer. He was 75. Wright is most famous for his role as the adoptive father to Alf, a back-talking alien puppet who crash-landed on Earth. The series ran from 1986 to 1990 and featured Wright in every season. His other television credits include episodes of shows such as “Murphy Brown,” “Friends,” “Quantum Leap,” “Cheers,” and “The Drew Carey Show.”
TODAY’S SHOW BIZ SKED:
• “Jimmy Kimmel Live” (ABC/Global): Joel McHale, Betty Gilpin, Santana (R)
• “The Tonight Show starring Jimmy Fallon” (NBC/CTV): Selena Gomez, Elaine Welteroth, GoldLink featuring Maleek Berry
• “Late Night with Seth Meyers” (NBC/CTV): Kevin Bacon, Cobie Smulders, Jordan Klepper, Jessica Burdeaux (R)
• “The Late Late Show with James Corden” (CBS/CTV): Zoe Saldana, Jason Clarke, Kenny DeForest (R)
• “The View” (ABC/CTV): Day of Hot Topics
• “The Talk” (CBS): Dean Cain
• “Live with Kelly and Ryan” (ABC/CTV): Charlize Theron, Michael Ealy, Mark Hamill
• “The Ellen DeGeneres Show” (NBC/CTV): Favorite moments from games with celebrities, including Melissa McCarthy, Sandra Bullock, Blake Shelton, Chris Pratt, Kristen Bell, Dax Shepard
• “Family Pictures” (LIFETIME): Sylvie and Maggie are two strangers leading very similar lives. But when their daughters befriend each other on a college tour, they soon discover a shocking secret that threatens to tear both families apart.
• “Sister of the Bride” (HALLMARK): When anthropology professor Stephanie gets engaged to her boyfriend, Ben, after only sixth months of dating, they head to Stephanie’s family’s Palm Springs vacation house excited to share the news.
• “Watch What Happens Live” (Bravo): Terry Crews, Gizelle Bryant
• “Instinct” (CBS): In the Season 2 premiere, Dylan and Lizzie investigate the murder of a businesswoman who attempted to prolong the lifespan of humans.
• “Celebrity Family Feud” (ABC): The Chainsmokers vs. 5 Seconds of Summer
BS MUSIC NOTES:
• Justin Bieber — Actress Drew Barrymore is digging the fact that he is using her face on t-shirts for his Drew House fashion line. Barrymore and Bieber have both been posting on social media about the new clothing, following months of trading shoutouts to each other.
• Miley Cyrus — The rumors are true: she has teamed up with Ariana Grande and Lana Del Rey on a song for the upcoming “Charlie’s Angels” reboot. On Wednesday, Cyrus and Grande posted a cryptic video on Instagram and Twitter, featuring the Charlie’s Angels logo, with “Uploading…” written below it.
• Eminem – His biological father Marshall Bruce Mathers Jr. has died of a heart attack at 67. Em’s father, who was frequently targeted as a deadbeat dad in his lyrics, walked out on Eminem’s mom while he was still a baby.
• Paul McCartney — says he started to ”believe” rumors that he and John Lennon were ”arch-rivals” after reading so many stories about how their relationship was ”very heavy and ugly”, so he likes to look at old photos and see their bond. Quote: “The idea we weren’t friends is rubbish. We were lifelong friends, our relationship was super-special.”
• Black Sabbath — marked their 50th anniversary by opening a new exhibition in Birmingham that celebrates legacy. The “Home Of Metal: Black Sabbath at 50” exhibition at the Birmingham Museum and Art Gallery, features various items from the band’s history and some of the biggest tributes from their fans.
• Aerosmith — will be reunited with their original 1970’s touring van after it was located last summer in the woods near Boston. The 1964 International Harvester van has been restored and viewers can see it revealed to the band on American Pickers: “Aerosmith Van” July 8th on the History channel.
Alice Cooper — is lending his voice to the Disney Channel animated series “Mickey and the Roadster Racers”. In his guest-starring role, Cooper will play Alistair Coop De Ville, “an old friend of Goofy’s uncle.” The episode airs on Friday, July 5.
• Jake Owen — shared a message of love and acceptance via Instagram, with a countrified version of Cher’s ‘Believe’. He and his bandleader Lukas Bracewell replaced the 1998 hit’s autotuned vocals and dance beats with acoustic guitar and banjo, creating a campfire singalong vibe.
• Dierks Bentley — fell off a mountain bike in Colorado and had to go to the emergency room. He called in late for a scheduled interview on Tuesday, saying that he was “just trying to get my summertime on before I get back out on the road, and I just took a wipe, and my wrist is a little messed up.” He later shared that “broke a few bones” in his hand but his guitar playing looks to be minimally affected.
TODAY’S MOVIE OPENINGS:
• “Annabelle Comes Home” (R-Rated, Horror): Ed and Lorraine Warren bring the possessed doll to the locked artifacts room in their home, placing her “safely” behind sacred glass. But an unholy night of horror awaits as Annabelle awakens the evil spirits in the room, who all set their sights on a new target — the Warrens’ ten-year-old daughter, Judy, and her friends. (Vera Farmiga, Patrick Wilson)
• “Yesterday” (PG-13, Comedy/Romance): A struggling musician realizes he’s the only person on Earth who can remember The Beatles after waking up in an alternate timeline where they never existed. (Himesh Patel, Lily James)
• “Ophelia” (PG-13, Drama): A re-imagining of Hamlet, told from Ophelia’s perspective. As Ophelia and Hamlet’s secretive love affair takes flight, betrayal strikes the court, threatening to derail their union and devastate the royal family for good. Caught between her desires and her loyalty, Ophelia has to decide where her devotion will ultimately lie. (Daisy Ridley, Naomi Watts)
HAVE LOVE, WILL TRAVEL?
How far would you be willing to go for love? The moving company “Hire a Helper” polled 1,000 Americans and found that about two-thirds of online daters would travel no more than 30 miles to meet a potential partner. Among millennials, 49 per cent set their limit at just 20 miles or less. 35% of respondents said they wouldn’t be willing to go outside their city in their search for love, and about 29% set their limit to within their home state. Among the more adventurous, just 9 per cent said that distance wasn’t a consideration at all. And perhaps surprisingly, men were more likely than women to say they would only consider matches within the general vicinity of where they live, by a margin of 43 to 37%.
(20 miles or less? I was hoping to meet someone that I didn’t already know!)
(When I was dating, I drove further than that to find the right Valentines Day card!)
(On the other hand, all respondents agreed that there was no limit on how far they would go to avoid someone!)
NEWS OF THE WEIRD:
➢ An Air Canada passenger says she was forced to organize her own escape from an empty plane after flight crews left her asleep in her seat. Tiffani O’Brien says that she took a flight from Quebec City to Toronto’s Pearson International Airport, and when she woke up aboard the plane, she was completely alone in the pitch-black aircraft. She tried to charge her phone, but there was no power in the USB port, so she made her way to the cockpit, but couldn’t use the plane’s radio without power. She eventually found a flashlight and got the attention of a baggage attendant who brought a ladder truck to the plane to rescue her. The airline is reviewing the incident.
(“Your luggage should be coming off the plane any minute now…”)
➢ There’s not much better than a campout with your friends and a ton of beer. Unfortunately, this pig also felt that way. At a campground in Port Hedland, Australia, a group of campers finished their evening and went to bed, and awoke to the sound of a wild pig who was just finishing the last of their beer, and then went straight for the trash. What happened next? The pig started a fight with a cow. After the battle, the pig ran to the river and passed out. Unfortunately, that was the only fun part about the story. The pig next tried to cross the road, and was hit by a truck.
(This little piggy went “Wee, wee, wee”, but only got part of the way home…)
BS CHRONOMETER 6.28.19
TODAY’S CELEBIRTHDAYS . . .
1926  Mel Brooks (Kaminsky), Brooklyn NY, Broadway producer (“The Producers”)/movie director (“Blazing Saddles”, “Spaceballs”)
1948  Kathy Bates, Memphis TN, movie actress (“Titanic”, “Misery”), TV actress (“American Horror Story”)
1966  John Cusack, Evanston IL, movie actor (“Say Anything”, “Grosse Pointe Blank”)
1971  Elon Musk, Pretoria, South Africa, entrepreneur (founder of PayPal, SpaceX, and Tesla Motors)/his 2019 net worth is listed at $19.2 billion)
1977  Mark Stoermer, Houston TX, rock bassist (The Killers-‘When You Were Young’)
1986  Kellie Pickler, Albemarle NC, TV personality (“I Love Kellie Pickler” 2015, “Dancing With the Stars” winner 2013/country singer (‘Red High Heels’)/“American Idol” finalist 2006
Gary Busey (“Buddy Holly Story”) is 75; Melora Hardin (“The Office”) is 52; Judith Hoag (“Nashville”) is 51; Nicole Scherzinger (Pussycat Dolls) is 41; Lily Rabe (“American Horror Story”) is 37; Colin Jost (“Saturday Night Live”) is 37; Camila Mendes (“Riverdale”) is 25
Vincent D’Onofrio (“Law & Order: Criminal Intent”) is 60; Boxing champ Mike Tyson is 53; Molly Parker (“House of Cards”) is 46; Fantasia Barrino (‘I Believe’) is 35; Champion swimmer Michael Phelps is 34
TODAY’S BS REASONS TO PARTY . . .
• “Insurance Awareness Day”. Hmm, now who do you think came up with this one? Insurance is a gamble. If you buy it, you’re gambling that something will go wrong. If you don’t buy it, you’re gambling that something will not. (And even if it doesn’t, the rates still go up!)
• “International Body Piercing Day”, celebrated in piercing and modification communities worldwide. It coincides with the birthday of Jim Ward, the ‘father of modern piercing’. (How do you suppose they recommend you observe this day?)
• “Tapioca Day”, honoring that stuff you put in pudding that looks like fish eyes in glue.
• “CAPS LOCK DAY”, to poke fun at those individuals who unnecessarily capitalize letters, words, and phrases….NOW STOP YELLING!
• “Paul Bunyan Day”, celebrating the famous American fable about the giant lumberjack who performed incredible feats such as scooping out the Great Lakes to get water for ‘Babe’, his blue ox.
• “Camera Day”, which has unknown origins but it is always celebrated on June 29th. The day celebrates the camera and its value to society. (Check Instagram for some of these ‘valuable’ contributions … mostly involving cats)
• “Hug Holiday”, which encourages us to give hugs to those who really need them. The focus is on the elderly, sick and lonely, and anyone who needs the warmth, cheer, and love that a hug provides. Be sure to ask first. (If you knew my Aunt Betty, you’d be asking for a holiday FROM hugs today!)
• “Waffle Iron Day”, which celebrates the great kitchen gadget that makes tasty treats. The waffle dates back to the 1300s in Greece, where flat cakes were cooked between two metal pans. At the time, they topped it with cheeses and herbs. (Aunt Jemima wasn’t around yet…)
• “Almond Buttercrunch Day”, a combination of toffee covered with chocolate, sprinkled with toasted almonds. (It’s definitely worth a special day to me!)
ALMOND FUN FACTS:
✓ There are 5,639 people in the U.S. listed on whitepages.com with the last name ‘Almond’.
✓ Chocolate manufacturers use 40% of the world’s almonds.
✓ It takes more than 1.2 million beehives to pollinate California’s Almond crop (over 550,000 acres)
• “Asteroid Day” (aka “Meteor Day”), an annual observance on the anniversary of the 1908 ‘Tunguska Event’ in Russia, the largest impact on Earth in recorded history, even though the asteroid or comet is believed to have burst in the air rather than hitting the surface.
• “National Organization For Women Day”, marking the date in 1966 that ‘NOW’ was founded in Washington DC by 28 delegates at the National Conference of State Commissions on the Status of Women.
• “Social Media Day”, launched in 2010 to recognize and celebrate social media’s impact on global communication. Really, isn’t EVERY day “Social Media Day”?
• “Canada Day”, the annual celebration of Canada’s nationhood (1867) that was first established as a holiday in 1879. THIS YEAR’s Parliament Hill bash in Ottawa includes performances by Brett Kissel, the Strumbellas, K’naan, and the Canadian Armed Forces Snowbirds.
THIS DAY IN SHOW BIZ . . .
1998  1st TV ratings week in which more viewers watch cable/satellite channels than broadcast channels (that Home & Garden channel is riveting, isn’t it?)
2003  “Pirates of the Caribbean: The Curse of the Black Pearl”, starring Johnny Depp, Keira Knightley and Orlando Bloom, premieres at Disneyland
TODAY’S MUSIC EVENTS . . .
2003  After Ruben Studdard beats Clay Aiken to win Season 2 of “American Idol”, their first singles debut at the top of the Hot 100. Aiken becomes the first new artist to go straight to #1 with ‘This is the Night’
2007  Spice Girls announce they’ll reform for a world tour to take place in December 2007 and January 2008 with the original line-up (they wrapped up their latest reunion tour this month – without Victoria Beckham)
TODAY’S FIRST . . .
1953  GM workers assemble the 1st ‘Corvette’ sports car in Flint, Michigan. List price? U.S. $3,498. Now? $70,043
TODAY’S RECORD . . .
1988  An ostrich at the Israeli Kibbutz Ha’on lays the ‘Heaviest Bird Egg Ever Recorded’ … 5.1 lbs (2.3 kg)
BS WHACK FACTS:
✓ It takes food 7 seconds to travel from the mouth to the stomach.
✓ It takes 8.5 minutes for light from the sun to reach Earth.
✓ Most burglaries occur in winter.
✓ The hummingbird is the only bird that can fly backward.
✓ The magic word “abracadabra” was originally intended to be spoken to cure hay fever.
✓ Kermit the Frog is left-handed.
CANADIAN PARTY GAMES:
• Moose Trap
• Drakes and Ladders
• Are You Smarter Than a Grade Fiver?
• Crazy Ehs
• Rock, Paper, Sorry
• Guess Which Rush Song I’m Air-Drumming
• You Don’t Know Jacques
• Cards Supporting Humanity
• Simon Asks Politely
• Free Operation
Best of BS . . .
BS OVERHEARD AT THE GROCERY STORE:
• “Our store has four checkout lanes open at all times. Unless we’re really busy. Then there’s just one.”
• “Whenever someone ONLY buys toilet paper, you can tell they’re in a hurry.”
• “Would you like your milk in a bag?” “No, just leave it in the jug.”
• “According to the box, I’ve been eating enough lasagna for four people.”
• “Where’s the vegan, gluten-free, fat-free, dairy-free, sugar-free, carb-free aisle?”
• “Sir, the sign says 8 items or LESS. I don’t care if your name is Les!”
• “Yes, I work here. I’m not wearing this garish green get-up as some kind of as fashion statement.”
• “Why do people insist on arranging their family reunion in the middle of aisle 3?”
• “Mom, if you’re eating for two, how many is that lady eating for?”
• “Please put some clothes on, Ma’am. This isn’t Walmart.”
-Twitter, first published in ‘BS’ in 2018
BS CANADA DAY QUIZ, EH?
1. The word ‘Canada’ (originally Kanata) is an aboriginal word meaning:
d. village [CORRECT]
2. The longest river in Canada is:
a. St. Lawrence River
b. Fraser River
c. Mackenzie River [CORRECT]
d. Red River
3. What are Canada’s two national sports?
a. hockey [CORRECT]
b. lacrosse [CORRECT]
4. The group of seven were:
d. painters [CORRECT]
BS RANDOM JOKE:
In alcohol’s defense, I’ve done some pretty stupid stuff while completely sober, too.
BS PHONE STARTER:
What’s on your “summer bucket list”?
BS WATER COOLER QUESTION:
Question: 72% of us have purchased one of these even though we couldn’t pronounce its name. What is it?
Answer: A bottle of wine
BS DEEP THOUGHT:
We might think we are nurturing our garden, but of course it’s our garden that is really nurturing us.