Friday, June 15, 2012        Edition: #4766

Have Another Sheetload!

BS SHOW BIZ BUZZ:
70-year-old boxing legend Muhammad Ali is the new face of Louis Vuitton’s latest Core Values campaign, appearing in print ads alongside his grandson beginning today (the stylish ads were shot by Annie Leibovitz) . . . 50-year-old movie star Jim Carrey has put his beach house in California’s exclusive Malibu Colony enclave up for sale at $13.95 million, which is described as ‘priced for immediate sale’ (uh, maybe in your world) . . . “Hollywood Reporter” reports that the now-shooting Johnny Depp Western movie “Lone Ranger”, which had its budget cut to $215 million, is now well over that figure (250 and counting) and is also weeks behind schedule (do you smell turkey?) . . . The new issue of “Entertainment Weekly” features the “Twilight Saga” love child on the cover, alongside ‘parents’ Kristen Stewart & Robert Pattinson (the movie’s not out till November 16th, kinda jumping the gun aren’t we?) . . . Lindsay Lohan isn’t just dealing with last week’s car accident, she’s also still struggling with an alleged driving mishap from 2 years ago, the paparazzo who claims she hit him demanding $16-grand-plus to cover medical bills (it’d be a lot cheaper for her if she’d just hire a chauffeur) . . . And this week Oprah Winfrey interviewed the fame-whoring Kardashian family for “Oprah’s Next Chapter”, the results airing Sunday on OWN (O, how the mighty have fallen!).

WEEKEND SHOW BIZ SKED:

• “Good Morning America” (ABC) – This morning the Beach Boys (“That’s Why God Made The Radio”).
• “Jimmy Kimmel Live” (ABC/CHCH) – Tonight K’Naan (“Country, God, or The Soul”). Rerun.
• “Last Call With Carson Daly” (NBC) – Tonight Milow (“North and South”). Rerun.
• “Late Late Show With Craig Ferguson” (CBS) – Tonight The Imagineers (“See As I Say”).
• “Late Show With David Letterman” (CBS/NTV/Omni1) – Tonight Best Coast (“The Only Place”). Rerun.
• “Megastunts – Highwire Over Niagara Falls – Live!” (ABC/CTV) – Tonight Nik Wallenda (of the 7-generation circus family, the Flying Wallendas) crosses Niagara Falls on a tightrope. He’ll walk 1,550-ft  from the US side to the Canadian on a highwire suspended 173 ft above the Horseshoe Falls. This has been banned for 128 years, but after much lobbying, Wallenda scored special permission. At ABC-TV’s insistence, he’ll be tethered to the tightrope so he can’t fall and kill himself. (Wimpy!)
NET: http://tinyurl.com/73fdnwh
• “MuchMusic Video Awards” (MuchMusic) – Sunday night Canada’s annual trophies for music videos are handed out live from Toronto. Vancouver band Marianas Trench leads nominations with 7, followed by Drake and Hedley with 5 apiece. Performers & presenters include Carly Rae Jepsen, Flo Rida, Justin Bieber, Katy Perry, Kelly Clarkson, LMFAO, Nelly Furtado, and more.
NET: http://mmva.muchmusic.com
• “NBA Finals” (ABC/TSN) – Sunday it’s Game 3 from American Airlines Arena in Miami.
• “Saturday Night Live” (NBC/Global) – Pseudo-actress Lindsay Lohan hosts; musical guest Jack White (“Blunderbuss”). Rerun.
• “Today Show” (NBC) – Today Justin Bieber (“Believe”, out Tuesday).
• “Tonight Show With Jay Leno” (NBC/CTV2) – Tonight Olly Murs (“In Case You Didn’t Know”).
• “US Open Golf Championship” (NBC) – Saturday & Sunday from the Olympic Club in San Francisco.

BS MUSIC NOTES:

• Aerosmith – Their 18-city “Global Warming Tour” begins Saturday in Minneapolis, Minnesota and wraps August 8th in Tacoma, Washington. Cheap Trick opens all shows.
• Bobby Brown – This weekend Whitney Houston’s ex & his fiancée Alicia Etheridge are getting hitched in Hawaii. They’ve been engaged for 2 years and have a 3-year-old son. He’s performing in Honolulu with his band New Edition.
• Kanye West – This week his Hollywood Hills home was burglarized while he continues to tour in England with Jay-Z. LAPD say it’s unclear if anything was taken. The 4,200-sq-ft mansion has been on the market for circa $4 million. It features a massive aquarium wall and numerous computer-controlled security systems. (That apparently aren’t any good.)
• Miranda Lambert – The animal-loving country star has made a habit of rescuing stray pooches, and she quickly grew emotionally attached to one she recently found abandoned alongside a highway. She says she’s thrilled her hubby Blake Shelton has gone along with the idea of keeping the black mutt that they’ve now named ‘Loretta’.
• Rascal Flatts – Tonight they kick off “The American Band Tour” in Hartford, Connecticut. The tour features an all-band bill with Little Big Town, Eli Young Band, and Edens Edge opening the shows. The trek will last at least into September.
• Rihanna – She tells “Us Weekly” her hectic schedule is causing her to wither away. Quote: “I’m a size 0 and not happy about it. I prefer myself a bit chunkier. I want my old butt back!” (She should eat more birthday cake cake cake cake cake …)
• Ringo Starr – Tonight’s performance by his All-Starr Band at Fallsview Casino in Niagara Falls, Ontario has been moved up to 7 pm so as not to conflict with Nik Wallenda’s attempt to cross the falls on a tightrope. Starr jokes: “We’re opening for the guy.”

TODAY’S MOVIE OPENINGS:

• “Rock of Ages” ( PG-13 Musical ): Tom Cruise, playing outrageous rock star ‘Stacee Jaxx’, is just part of the star-studded cast in this bigscreen adaptation of the Broadway play centering on 1980s-era metal-rock . Co-stars Julianne Hough, Diego Boneta, Alec Baldwin, Russell Brand, Catherine Zeta-Jones. Shot in Fort Lauderdale, Florida.
NET: http://rockofagesmovie.warnerbros.com
• “That’s My Boy” ( R-Rated Comedy ): Adam Sandler plays a single-parent dad who resurfaces unexpectedly before his son’s wedding. Trying desperately to reconnect, he’s now forced to deal with the repercussions of his bad parenting skills. Co-stars  Andy Samberg, Leighton Meester, Susan Sarandon. Cameos by Vanilla Ice, Tony Orlando, Ciara.
NET: http://www.thatsmyboy-movie.com
• “The Woman In the Fifth” ( R-Rated Thriller ): In this oddball head-scratcher of a mystery, Ethan Hawke plays a college teacher who flees to Paris after a scandal costs him his job. In the City of Light he meets a widow who may be involved in a series of murders. Co-stars Kristin Scott Thomas. The ‘Fifth’ in the title refers to the 5th arrondisement, aka the Latin Quarter.
NET: http://womaninthefifth-movie.com
• Opening in limited release:     “Something From Nothing: The Art of Rap”; “Your Sister’s Sister”.

CHIP ON YOUR SHOULDER:
Japanese researchers at Yamagata University are developing a wearable robot called the ‘MH2′ that fits on your shoulder and can be remotely inhabited by friends from anywhere in the world. Here’s how it’s designed to work: You’ve got a friend you want to share an experience with, but instead of having said friend come along with you, you bring an ‘MH-2′ instead. Back home, your friend wears a 360-degree 3-D display and sees whatever the ‘MH-2′ sees. Meanwhile, the robot on your shoulder acts like an avatar, duplicating the speech and gestures of your friend for you to interact with directly. (Creepy!)
– TheGlobeandMail.com

CATS ARE SOCIAL?
Presenting “Meowbook”, the ‘social networking thingy for cats’. This sorta-Facebook for felines features photos and videos of cats … well, being cats. Status updates include ‘Meow ate some mice today’ and ‘Meow, meow, meow, meow, meow, meow, meow, meow, meow, meow, meow, meow!’ (If all the cute cat antics are going to be collected here, can we take them off every other freakin’ site?)
NET: http://meow-book.com
– Digg.com

WE’RE BEING CARBONATED:
The world’s air has reached what scientists call a troubling new milestone for carbon dioxide, the main global warming pollutant. This Spring monitoring stations across the Arctic have measured more than 400 parts per million of the heat-trapping gas in the atmosphere. Years ago, it passed the 350 ppm mark that many scientists say is the highest safe level for carbon dioxide. It now stands globally at 395. So far, only the Arctic has reached the 400 level, but the rest of the world will follow soon. (Get the handcart ready!)
– Associated Press

BS AMAZING FACT:

1-in-5,000 North Atlantic lobsters are born bright blue. (But they still taste good with butter.)
– ListsOPlenty.com

BS CHRONOMETER 06.15.12


TODAY’S CELEBIRTHDAYS . . .
1954 [58] Jim Belushi, Chicago IL, TV actor (“The Defenders” 2010-11, “According to Jim” 2001-09)/movie actor (“The Ghost Writer”, “K-9″)/brother of late actor-comedian John Belushi

1963 [49] Helen Hunt, LA CA, movie actress (“Soul Surfer”, Oscar-“As Good As It Gets”)/TV actress (“Mad About You” 1992-99)

1964 [48] Courteney Cox, Birmingham AL, TV actress (“Cougar Town” 2009-12, “Dirt” 2007, “Friends” 1994-2004)/movie actress (“Scream” movies)/newly divorced Mrs David Arquette

1966 [46] Michael Britt, Fort Worth TX, country singer/guitarist (Lonestar-“You’re Like Comin’ Home”, “Mr Mom”)

1969 [43] Ice Cube (O’Shea Jackson), LA CA, movie actor (“Are We There Yet?”, “Barbershop”)/rapper (“Pushin’ Weight”)

1973 [39] Neil Patrick Harris, Albuquerque NM, TV actor (‘Barney Stinson on “How I Met Your Mother” since 2005)/Tony Awards host

1976 [36] Gary Lightbody, Bangor, Northern Ireland, alt-rock singer (Snow Patrol-“Signal Fire”, “Chasing Cars”)

1981 [31] Billy Martin, Naptown MD, pop-rock guitarist (Good Charlotte-“The River”, “Hold On”)

SATURDAY –
Movie actor John Cho (“Harold & Kumar” films) is 40; Movie-TV actor Eddie Cibrian (Mr LeAnn Rimes) is 39; TV actress Missy Peregrym (“Rookie Blue”) is 30; Comedian-actress Abigail Elliott (“Saturday Night Live”) is 25; Pop-rock bassist Ian Keaggy (Hot Chelle Rae) is 25; R&B-pop singer Keshia Chanté (“Does He Love Me?”) is 24.

SUNDAY –
Oldies singer Barry Manilow (“I Write the Songs”) is 69; Movie actor Thomas Haden Church (“Sideways”) is 51; Movie actor Greg Kinnear (“Little Miss Sunshine”) is 49; Actor-comedian Will Forte (“Saturday Night Live”) is 42; Tennis player Venus Williams is 32.

TODAY’S BS REASONS TO PARTY . . .

• “Avon Heritage Duct Tape Festival”, the 10th annual in Avon OH, home to the manufacturer of Duck Brand Duct Tape. Weekend festivities are highlighted by a ‘Duct Tape Fashion Show’.
NET: http://www.avonducktapefestival.com
• “Global Wind Day”, a worldwide event that occurs annually on June 15th. It’s a day for promoting wind, its power, and the possibilities it holds to change our world.
NET: http://www.globalwindday.org
• “National Man Day”, begun by a pair of Indiana guys in 2008 and popularized via Facebook and their website. (Similar to ‘Stupid Guy Thing Day’, coming up June 22nd.)
NET: http://www.thereturnofman.com
• “Nature Photography Day”, saluting a favorite hobby of camera buffs. (Please, show us those 8,200 photos of squirrels again?)
• “World Elder Abuse Awareness Day”, the 7th annual when we’re encouraged to show the world we care about ending elder abuse and neglect by wearing something purple for the day.
NET: http://www.inpea.net/weaad.html
• “Power Of a Smile Day”, recognizing the 2nd-best thing you can do with your lips.
• “Work@Home Father’s Day”, held the Friday before “Father’s Day” to honor fathers ‘who work from home as a means of providing balance between professional satisfaction and family interaction’. They’d be saluted Sunday like other dads except … they’ll likely be working.

SATURDAY –
• “Fudge Day”, celebrating the ooey-gooey treat that can be inhaled warm or cold. Fudge is said to be a result of the late-night cravings of Vassar College girls in the early 20th century.
• “International Day Of the African Child”, first initiated by the Organization of African Unity in 1991. It honors those who participated in the Soweto Uprising on this date in 1976. In South Africa, it’s celebrated as “Youth Day”.
• “Morticians Day”, saluting undertakers and all others who work in the funeral or cemetery biz. Don’t stiff out on saluting them … people are dying to throw them a party!
• “National Hollerin’ Contest”, the 43rd annual screams into Spivey’s Corner NC, the ‘Hollerin’ Capital of the Universe’. Hollerin’ was the original form of communication in them thar’ hills.
NET: http://bit.ly/c4mz9O
• “World Juggling Day”. You can create the sound of juggling with your co-host by slapping your knees quickly and throwing in lots of grunts and interjections like ‘Hey!’.
NET: http://www.juggle.org/wjd

SUNDAY –
• “Father’s Day”, first proclaimed by the mayor of Spokane WA 102 years ago (June 19, 1910) at the request of one Louise Smart Dodd. It’s now celebrated in about 20 countries, including Britain, Canada, and the USA on the 3rd Sunday of June. “Father’s Day” in Australia & NZ will be celebrated September 2nd this year. An estimated $1 billion is now spent each year on “Father’s Day” gifts. A greeting card industry study ranks “Father’s Day” the 5th-largest card-giving occasion. (A great tradition or just another day of forced obligation?)
• “World Day to Combat Desertification & Drought”, hifalutin UN terminology suggesting we may have a water shortage problem in many parts of the world.

THIS DAY IN SHOW BIZ . . .

1994 [18] Disney’s “The Lion King” opens in movie theaters (a landmark event for today’s 20-somethings)

TODAY’S MUSIC EVENT . . .

1956 [56] 15-year-old John Lennon meets 13-year-old Paul McCartney (The Beatles ensue)

TODAY’S FIRSTS . . .

2002 [10] Asteroid 2002-MN misses Earth by 75,000 miles (121,000 km), about one-third the distance between Earth and the Moon

2004 [08] Tim Berners-Lee receives the $1.2-million ‘Millennium Technology Prize’ in Helsinki, Finland for creating the World Wide Web

TODAY’S RECORD . . .

1887 [125] Carlisle D Graham survives his 2nd ride in a barrel over Niagara Falls

COMING UP . . .
[Mon] Ride Your Motorcycle to Work Day
[Mon] International Sushi Day
[Tues] World Sauntering Day
[Wed] Summer begins
[Wed] 2012 NHL Awards (Las Vegas)
[Wed] Rolling Stones’ 50th anniversary
This Week Is … Automotive Service Professionals Week
This Month Is … Lane Courtesy Month

BULL’S BITS


MORE SHEET YOUR DAD SAYS:
• “Don’t make me stop the car!”
• “What did I just get finished telling you?”
• “Come here, pull my finger.”
• “Were you born in a barn? Close the door!”
• “Get your elbows off the table!”
• “When I was your age, I treated MY father with respect.”
• “Turn off those lights. Do you think I’m made of money?”
• “Don’t give me any of your lip, young lady.”
• “You call that noise ‘music’?”
• “Act your age!”

BS PHONE STARTER:
☎ Sunday is “Eat Your Vegetables Day”, an observance likely begun by somebody’s mommy somewhere. What’s the absolute worst-tasting veggie? Broccoli? Brussels sprouts? Cabbage? Parsnips?

BS RANDOM JOKE:
Dad: “Son, hand me a wrench”
Son: “What size wrench you want Dad?”
Dad: “Doesn’t matter, I’m gonna use it as a hammer!”

BS WEB GOODIE:

‘Punchfork’ is a website full of recipes that people tweet about, so they’re ranked by trending.
NET: http://punchfork.com

BS WATER COOLER QUESTION:

Question: According to medical research, THIS is the most pleasurable body part to scratch.
Answer: Ankle.

BS DEEP THOUGHT:
There is nothing new under the sun, but there are lots of old things we don’t know.


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