Monday, June 15, 2015        Edition: #5473


Here, Have Another Sheetload!

BS SHOW BIZ BUZZ:
★ “Jurassic World” stomped all over the competition Friday at the movie box office, gobbling up $83 million on its way to making upwards of $180 million in its opening weekend, according to estimates. If the projected figures are accurate, it’s the 3rd-largest opening weekend ever behind “The Avengers” ($207 million) and “The Avengers: Age of Ultron” ($191 million). Overseas, “Jurassic World” has been doing huge numbers since bowing last Wednesday in some markets. The film was made on a $150-million budget and is screening at 13,551 theaters worldwide, making it the widest Universal release ever.
– Variety.com
★ Sorta actor/sorta singer David Hasselhoff has a role in the upcoming spoof disaster sequel “Sharknado 3″, but the former “Baywatch” and “Knight Rider” star reveals he won’t be donning his red swimming trunks to play a lifeguard … his role is an astronaut. The Hoff won’t reveal whether he meets a sticky end like other cameo stars in the Syfy channel movie series (ie: Kelly Osbourne lasted mere minutes, as did Perez Hilton), but he does note that his appearance comes toward the end of the upcoming sequel. Quote: “It’s a really funny film. It’s so stupidly corny, it’s so great.”
– RadioTimes.com
★ And mega-star singer Taylor Swift has taken her role as ‘love councillor’ to her fans to the next level and become a couple’s wedding mascot … sort of. Katy Harris & Chris Eisenman of Philadelphia PA tied the knot in the parking lot of the Lincoln Financial Field, outside Taylor’s gig on Friday night. According to E! News, the ceremony was officiated by Harris’ brother. And, in lieu of a wedding reception, the new family and their closest friends and relations headed inside to catch the rest of T-Swift’s set. What, no cake?
– ContactMusic.com

TODAY’S SHOW BIZ SKED:
• “Jimmy Kimmel Live” (ABC/CityTV) – Dwight Yoakam (“Second Hand Heart”). Rerun.
• “Last Call With Carson Daly” (NBC) – Holy Wave (“Relax”). Rerun.
• “Late Late Show With James Corden” (CBS/Omni 1) – Bleachers (“Strange Desire”).
• “Late Night With Seth Meyers” (NBC/CTV) – Jamie xx (“In Colour”).
• “Making Of the Mob: New York” (AMC) – Debut of a new 8-part docu-drama that tracks more than 50 years of Mafia history; narrated by Ray Liotta (“Goodfellas”).
• “So You Think You Can Dance” (FOX/CTV) – Hopefuls in Los Angeles perform for the judges.
• “Today” (NBC) – This morning James Taylor (“Before This World”, out tomorrow).
• “Tonight Show Starring Jimmy Fallon” (NBC/CTV2) – Adam Lambert (“The Original High”).

BS MUSIC NOTES:
• Darius Rucker – He’s raised another $220,000 for St Jude Children’s Research Hospital in Memphis TN with a charity show and golf tourney last week. That boosts his annual benefit’s contribution to over $660,000 in total.
• 5 Seconds of Summer – The Aussie pop band cut short a concert at Wembley Arena in London UK Saturday night after guitarist Michael Clifford’s hair and face caught fire. Video shows he walked into a path of pyrotechnics as the band performed. He later tweeted a photo of himself all bandaged up but giving a thumbs-up to his followers.
• Florence + The Machine – They’ve debuted at #1 on the ‘Billboard 200′ album chart for the first time ever with their 3rd album, “How Big, How Blue, How Beautiful”.
• Foo Fighters – At a concert in Sweden on Friday night, Dave Grohl fell off the stage  and broke his leg while the band was playing “Monkey Wrench”. Unbelievably he came back to finish the set later while sitting down with his leg bandaged. The Foos’ next two Europe gigs are cancelled.
• Kanye West – While multiple tracks for his upcoming album “Swish” have been released, he says the project isn’t completed yet and he isn’t ready to reveal a release date.
• Little Big Town – “Girl Crush” remains atop the ‘Billboard Hot Country Songs’ chart again this week.
• Mariah Carey – TMZ reports she’s signed a deal to replace model Kate Upton as the face of “Game Of War” ads. The mobile game’s creators have reportedly signed a 7-figure deal with Carey, who’s set to film a new 30-second commercial very soon.
• Smashing Pumpkins – Their 1st-ever acoustic tour, “In Plainsong”, hits 7 cities in June, starting tonight in Buffalo NY and winding up in Minneapolis MN June 25th. The tour precedes this Summer’s co-headlining trek with Marilyn Manson.
• Snoop Dogg – As unlikely as it sounds, the 43-year-old rapper has thrown his hat in the ring to replace outgoing CEO Dick Costolo at Twitter.com. He’s kidding … we think.
• Van Morrison – He’s just been given a British knighthood in the Queen’s Birthday honors. The soon-to-be-70 singer-songwriter will headline the Love Supreme Festival, the UK’s only major greenfield jazz festival, in Sussex this July.
• Wale – The rapper’s fandom for “Seinfeld” is well known, and he has now parlayed it into a TBS series about the venerable sitcom this Summer. Titled “Seinfeld Remix”, Wale will host the show that features his favorite moments from the NBC-TV classic.
• Willie Nelson / Merle Haggard – Their first album together in 30 years, “Django & Jimmie”, is #1 this week on the ‘Billboard Country Albums’ chart.

COLORS LOOK BRIGHTEST WHEN WE’RE 25:
Scientists at Australia’s University of New South Wales in Sydney have been using brain waves to study color vision at different ages from childhood through maturity. The results suggest that the ability to distinguish between different hues varies with age. Researchers at the School of Optometry & Vision Science say they’ve found that color sensitivity is at its highest at about age 25, then begins to decline with advancing years. (Maybe that’s why ‘Marge Simpson’ has blue hair?)
– “The Age”

HOW TO BUILD THE PERFECT CAMPFIRE:
Whether you’re out in the wilderness or in your backyard, nothing beats a good campfire. And according to a new Duke University study, across various environments and civilizations humans all seem to build campfires in a similar way. Cones or pyramids are the go-to shape. Why? It’s the most efficient for air and heat flow. The study crunches numbers on various structures and finds that the hottest fires are as tall as they are wide. So, what does the perfectly-built campfire look like? Basically, an equilateral triangle. (Well yeah, we know that. What we wanna know is how to get the damn thing lit.)
– @SmithsonianMag

NEVER WASH YOUR BIRD:
Britain’s Food & Drink Federation has warned that rinsing a chicken under the tap may seem like a sensible and hygienic thing to do … but the exact opposite it true. It can spread any bacteria on the chicken to nearby surfaces and foods. Food safety experts say that rinsing poultry is unnecessary in the first place because the cooking process kills food poisoning bacteria. And rinsing the bird under the tap actually splashes any bacteria on the bird onto nearby utensils, kitchen surfaces, and foods. (Instead of washing the hen, wash your hands.)
– ANI

IT’S BETTER FOR GUYS:
Marriage is more beneficial to men than women … when it comes to health issues at least. A new study finds that women hardly benefit at all healthwise by getting married, while men who tie the knot are healthier overall than their single counterparts. The research conducted by University College London alongside several collaborating schools has found that unmarried men suffer more negative health effects than single women. For instance, a 14% increased risk of heart problems in unmarried men is barely noticeable in single women. The study has also found that getting divorced has little harmful impact on the future health of either men or women … as long as they find a new long-term partner. (My wife wanted to renew our vows. I told her I don’t want to make the same mistake twice.)
– The Independent”

BS AMAZING FACT:
Australia is unlikely to pass any gay marriage law soon. But something totally legal Down Under? Avunculate marriage, ie: uncles and nieces. (“And this is my husband Uncle Bob …”)
– PopBitch.com

BS CHRONOMETER 06.15.15


TODAY’S CELEBIRTHDAYS . . .
1954 [61] Jim Belushi, Chicago IL, TV actor (“The Defenders” 2010-11, “According to Jim” 2001-09)/movie actor (“The Ghost Writer”, “K-9″)/brother of late actor-comedian John Belushi

1963 [52] Helen Hunt, LA CA, movie actress (“The Sessions”, Oscar-”As Good As It Gets”)/TV actress (“Mad About You” 1992-99)

1964 [51] Courteney Cox, Birmingham AL, TV actress (“Cougar Town” 2009-15, “Friends” 1994-2004)/movie actress (“Scream” movies)

1966 [49] Michael Britt, Fort Worth TX, country singer-guitarist (Lonestar-”Mr Mom”, “Amazed”)

1969 [46] Ice Cube (O’Shea Jackson), LA CA, movie actor (“Are We There Yet?”, “Barbershop” movies)

1973 [42] Neil Patrick Harris, Albuquerque NM, movie actor (“Gone Girl”)/TV actor (“How I Met Your Mother” 2005-14)/former Tony, Emmy, and Academy Awards host

1976 [39] Gary Lightbody, Bangor, Northern Ireland, alt-rock singer (Snow Patrol-”Chasing Cars”)

1981 [34] Billy Martin, Naptown MD, pop-rock guitarist (Good Charlotte-”Lifestyles Of the Rich and Famous”, “Girls & Boys”)

1984 [31] Wayne ‘Wing’ Sermon, American Fork UT, indie rock guitarist (Imagine Dragons-”Radioactive”, “Demons”)

TODAY’S BS REASONS TO PARTY . . .
• “Global Wind Day”, a worldwide event that occurs annually on June 15th. It’s a day for promoting wind, its power, and the possibilities it holds to change our world.
NET: http://www.globalwindday.org

• “Nature Photography Day”, started in 2005 by the North American Photography Association to salute a favorite hobby of camera buffs. (Please, show us those 8,200 photos of squirrels again?)

• “Recess at Work Day” designed to encourage a change in workplace routine in order to increase morale and creative thinking.

• “Ride to Work on Your Motorcycle Day”, the 24th annual event initiated by the Ride to Work Organization to advocate and support the use of motorcycles and scooters for transportation.
NET: http://www.ridetowork.org

• “Smile Power Day”, recognizing the 2nd-best thing you can do with your lips. (After whistling.)

• “World Elder Abuse Awareness Day”, the 8th annual when we’re encouraged to show the world we care about ending elder abuse and neglect by wearing something purple for the day.
NET: http://www.inpea.net/weaad.html

THIS DAY IN SHOW BIZ . . .
2014 [01] Syndicated radio personality, voice actor, and co-creator of “American Top 40″ Casey Kasem dies at age 82 in Gig Harbor WA (after a bizarre feud with his daughter, his wife secretly has his body moved to a Montréal QC funeral home, then interred in Oslo, Norway in December)

TODAY’S MUSIC EVENT . . .
1956 [59] 15-year-old John Lennon meets 13-year-old Paul McCartney (The Beatles ensue)

TODAY’S FIRSTS . . .
1215 [800] Britain’s King John puts his royal seal on the ‘Magna Carta’, a cornerstone in the development of democracy in England

2004 [11] Tim Berners-Lee receives the $1.2-million ‘Millennium Technology Prize’ in Helsinki, Finland for creating the World Wide Web in 1989

TODAY’S RECORD . . .
2012 [03] Nik Wallenda becomes the 1st person to successfully tightrope walk over Niagara Falls (ABC-TV carries the event live but demands he be tethered to avoid potential disaster)

COMING UP . . .
[Tues] “Rizzoli & Isles” season debut (TNT)
[Wed] Ramadan begins at sundown (Muslim)
[Wed] Vans Warped Tour begins (Anchorage AK)
[Thurs] Amnesia Rockfest begins (Montebello QC)
[Thurs] Firefly Festival begins (Dover DE)
[Thurs] British Summer Time begins (London UK)
[Thurs] Country Jam begins (Grand Junction CO)

THIS WEEK IS . . .
Animal Rights Awareness Week / Hermit Week / Men’s Health Week / Nursing Assistants Week / Universal Fathers Week

BULL’S BITS


BEST OF BS:
Highlight bits culled from 22 years of “Bull Sheet” back issues …
BS ’5-IN-10 GAME’:
Your phone contestant has 10 seconds to name 5 of each of the following …
5 TV reality shows.
5 schoolyard games.
5 non-fattening foods.
5 things you drink through a straw.
5 prestigious universities.
Add up their total score to determine the prize.
– First published in “BS” 2005.

SHEET YOUR DAD SAYS:
(Just in time for Fathers Day this coming Sunday.)
• “You want something to do? I’ll give you something to do!”
• “Don’t make me stop the car!”
• “What did I just get finished telling you?”
• “Were you born in a barn? Close the door!”
• “Get your elbows off the table!”
• “When I was your age, I treated MY father with respect.”
• “Don’t give me any of your lip, young lady.”
• “Act your age!”
• “Do you think I’m made of money?”‘
• “You call that noise ‘music’?”
• “Because I said so. That’s why!”
• “I’m not just talking to hear my own voice!”
• “Come here, pull my finger.”
• “Ask your mother.”
– First published in “BS” 2000.
NET: http://www.FreeRadioPrep.com

BS PHONE STARTER:
☎ What’s the best-tasting veggie?

BS U-PICK TRIVIA:
• Ford Motor Company announced the manufacture of its 10 millionth automobile on this date in which decade?
a. 2000s.
b. 1960s.
c. 1920s. [CORRECT. Hard to believe but it was back in 1924.]
– “Amazing Facts”

• In which country did the ‘French kiss’ originate?
a. Peru. [CORRECT. Discovered on erotic Mochica pottery, dating from about 200 BC.]
b. Egypt.
c. Well duh, France of course.
– “Kissing: Everything You Wanted to Know”

BS RANDOM JOKE:
This just in: Police station toilet stolen … cops have nothing to go on.

BS WATER COOLER QUESTION:
Question: The average person does THIS only twice in a lifetime.
Answer: Breaks a mirror.

BS DEEP THOUGHT:
Some people will believe anything … if you whisper it.

BS FRESH MEAT:
Tim Ingram @ KTWI Liberal KS; Adam Wheeler @ A1 Radio, Cambridgeshire UK; and Deongello Vanorsby @ Power 98.3 [KKFR] Phoenix AZ.


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