Monday, June 17, 2013        Edition: #5008

Sheet Rocks!

✳ Kim Kardashian has given birth to a baby girl. She reportedly started having contractions Friday night and went into full labor early Saturday morning. The premature baby was 5 weeks early, weighing in at under 5 lbs, but both the babe and its mom are said to be in good health at LA’s Cedars-Sinai Medical Center. Kanye West was reportedly in the delivery room by Kim’s side after cancelling an appearance at his own record release party. Kim & Kanye have not revealed a name as yet, but she’s apparently told friends it will begin with a ‘K’. (‘Kanyette’?)
✳ One-hit-wonder Billy Ray Cyrus (“Achy-Breaky Heart”) and his wife Tish are splitsville after 19 years of marriage, citing ‘irreconcilable differences’. He filed for divorce in 2010, but withdrew the petition in an attempt work out their marriage. Now she’s filed papers in LA Superior Court, seeking full physical and legal custody of their 13-year-old son Noah as well as spousal support and her attorney’s fees. (Let’s hope the breakup doesn’t cause daughter Miley to go all weird or something.)
✳ Kirstie Alley’s new namesake sitcom “Kirstie’s New Show” is bringing back the golden oldies. Alley plays a successful Broadway actress and her former “Cheers” co-star Rhea Perlman co-stars as her assistant. George Wendt, who played barfly ‘Norm Peterson’ on “Cheers” will guest star. There will also be a “Seinfeld” reunion of sorts, with Jason Alexander and Michael Richards in regular roles. The show premieres on TV Land this Fall with 12 episodes. (And we’re betting not a single more.)
– “Hollywood Reporter”
✳ 30-year-old British actor Henry Cavill brought Hollywood to his hometown for a red-carpet unveiling of his new movie “Man Of Steel” on Friday night. The new ‘Superman’ was born and raised in Saint Helier on the English Channel island of Jersey and he returned there for a screening, joined by his co-stars Russell Crowe and Amy Adams. He posed for photogs on the red carpet with his mother and 4 brothers. (Apparently he’s not from Krypton after all.)
✳ And Michael Jackson’s 15-year-old daughter Paris, who’s recovering from her recent suicide attempt, has apparently told social workers at UCLA Medical Center she doesn’t want to be under the care of grandmother Katherine and cousin TJ Jackson anymore. According to an insider, Paris wants to live, she just doesn’t want to live at home anymore because she feels ‘stifled’. So what’s her preference? She wants to move in with her godmother, her late father’s 69-year-old friend Diana Ross. (Now there’s stability!)
– “Daily Star”

• “Ellen DeGeneres Show” (syndicated/CTV2) – Madonna (“MDNA”). Rerun.
• “Jimmy Kimmel Live” (ABC/CityTV) – Jimmy Eat World (“Damage”).
• “Late Night With Jimmy Fallon” (NBC/CTV2) – Anamanaguchi (“Endless Fantasy”).
• “Late Show With David Letterman” (CBS/NTV/Omni1) – Quadron (“Avalanche”).
• “Live With Kelly & Michael” (ABC/CTV) – Bret Michaels (“Custom Built”).
• “Tonight Show With Jay Leno” (NBC/CTV2) – Pitbull (“Global Warming”).
• “The Voice” (NBC/CTV2) – The 3 remaining artists go all out for votes on the final night of performances.
• “Wendy Williams” (syndicated) – Darlene Love (“The Sound Of Love: The Very Best Of Darlene Love”).

• Adele – Saturday the 25-year-old was awarded an OBE (Member of the Most Excellent Order of the British Empire) for her services to music on the Queen’s Birthday Honours annual list.
• Barenaked Ladies – Tonight they begin the “Last Summer On Earth Tour” in Dallas TX. Also on the bill: Ben Folds Five and Guster. Dates have been announced through July 30th in Brooklyn NY.
• Kanye West – Super-producer Rick Rubin tells “Wall Street Journal” he was brought aboard 3 weeks before the original release date of Ye’s new album “Yeezus” to help finish it. At the time, many of the vocals hadn’t been recorded, some still didn’t have lyrics. The end result is out  tomorrow.
• Mumford & Sons – They’ve cancelled dates at the Bonnaroo Festival in Tennessee over the weekend and this Thursday at the Telluride Bluegrass Festival in Colorado due to bassist Ted Dwane’s surgery to clear a blood clot near his brain. Dwane has now been discharged from hospital and is on the road to full recovery. Jack Johnson filled their slot at Bonnaroo.
• Paul McCartney – His 35-year-old son James tells “Daily Mail” he’s now re-bonded with his dad after years of taking drugs. He also discloses he used to sleep in bed with his father to cope with the grief of losing his mother Linda 15 years ago. James, who’s currently touring America as a musician, admits: “It’s hard to live up to The Beatles. Even Dad found it hard.”

1. “You should let a thick steak rest at room temperature before you cook it.” The reality is that letting it rest at room temperature accomplishes almost nothing. Instead, dry the steak thoroughly on paper towels before cooking, so that the surface moisture dissipates. You get much more efficient browning that way.
2. “Sear your meat over high heat to lock in juices.” Actually, a steak that is cooked gently first and finished with a sear will not only develop a deeper, darker crust, but it also cooks more evenly from center to edge, thus limiting the amount of overcooked meat and producing a finished product that is juicier and more flavorful.
3. “Bone-in steak has more flavor than boneless.” There is no exchange of flavor but there are some advantages to cooking with the bone in. First, it looks cool. Also, the bone acts as an insulator, meaning adjacent meat cooks a little bit less, making it more succulent and juicy than the rest of the steak.
4. “Only flip your steak once.” The reality is that multiple flipping will not only get your steak to cook up to 30% faster, it will actually cause it to cook more evenly. You don’t have to flip your steaks multiple times, but if someone tells you that you’re ruining it by flipping it over and over, you can assure them they are wrong.
5. “Don’t season your steak until after it’s cooked.” For best results, apply salt and/or other spices at least 45 minutes in advance, letting your steak rest on a rack in the fridge so that its surface can dry and the salt can be absorbed into the meat.

A new AAA study has found that using voice commands to send text messages and emails while driving is actually more distracting and dangerous than simply talking on a cellphone. Automakers have been trying to excite new-car buyers with dashboard infotainment systems that allow use of voice commands, noting that hands-free devices enable drivers to keep their hands on the wheel. But the new research shows that speech-to-text systems require greater concentration and are more distracting than talking on the phone, talking to a passenger, or listening to the radio. (You don’t focus with your hands, it’s done with the brain.)
– Condensed from CBS News

Are only children lonely and selfish? Not according to Lauren Sandler, author of the upcoming book “One and Only: The Freedom of Having an Only Child & The Joy of Being One”. While our culture might depict children without siblings as loners, misfits, and selfish, she claims research shows otherwise. Among the commonly-held beliefs she debunks …
✗ Only children are not lonely. They socialize just as much as anyone else.
✗ Only children are not more selfish than others and often tend to be very giving friends.
✗ Only children are not necessarily maladjusted. Kids’ support networks are mostly made up of friends, not siblings.
On the upside, ‘onlies’ feel more focused attention from their parents; on the downside, they may end up with sole responsibility for their parents when they age.
– Adapted from “New York Times”

A Spring Hill, Florida man identified only as Chris has added a 1300 cc Suzuki Hayabusa motorcycle engine to his golf cart. He claims that he can zip along at up to 100 mph. (Allowing him to finish a round of golf in like 4 minutes.)

• Venezuelans are using mobile phone apps to locate scarce toilet paper. (Heard of ‘Gas Buddy’? This is ‘Butt Buddy’.)
– “The Guardian”
• Dogs have been domesticated for 100,000 years or more. (Scientists have found a fossilized slipper with teeth marks.)
– “Science”
• According to Advertising Age, 46% of online ads are never seen. (Ever clicked a banner ad? Didn’t think so.)
• Cats born with two faces are known as ‘Janus’ cats. (But more commonly known as ‘eeeew creepy!!!’)
– “Daily Express”


1943 [70] Barry Manilow (Pincus), Brooklyn NY, oldies singer who’s sold more than 80 million records worldwide (“I Write the Songs”, “Copacabana”)/Las Vegas entertainer

1960 [53] Thomas Haden Church (McMillen), Yolo CA, movie actor (“Spider-Man 3”, “Sideways”)

1963 [50] Greg Kinnear, Logansport IN, movie actor (“Flash of Genius”, “Little Miss Sunshine”)/TV actor (“The Kennedys”)/TV personality (“Later With Greg Kinnear” 1994, E!’s “Talk Soup” 1991-94)  UP NEXT: “Anchorman: The Legend Continues”, December 20th.

1980 [33] Venus Williams, Lynwood CA, former #1-ranked women’s tennis player (now #32) with fastest recorded serve in WTA history (127 mph)/21 Grand Slam titles/older sister of tennis player Serena Williams

• “Bake Your Own Bread Day”. You might be surprised to find how relaxing it is to knead bread, to say nothing of the wonderful aroma as it bakes!

• “Eat Your Vegetables Day”, an observance likely begun by somebody’s mommy somewhere.

• “International Violin Day”, celebrating composer Igor Stravinsky’s birth anniversary in 1882. A good day to pluck your G-string.

• “Ride Your Motorcycle to Work Day”, the 17th annual observance encouraging owners of cycles and scooters to commute to work on them to demonstrate …
* The number of motorcyclists to the general public and to politicians.
* That motorcyclists are from all occupations and all walks of life.
* That motorcyclists can reduce traffic and parking congestion in large cities.
What began in 1992 as an informal event in Minnesota now has participating riders in a dozen or more countries.

• “World Day to Combat Desertification & Drought”, hifalutin UN terminology suggesting we may have a water shortage problem in many parts of the world.

1994 [19] California Highway Patrol begins a 60-mile, low-speed pursuit of murder suspect OJ Simpson in a white Ford Bronco driven by his friend Al Cowlings (the entire chase is covered by cameras in helicopters and seen live by an estimated 95 million on TV)

1989 [24] New Kids On the Block hit “I’ll Be Loving You Forever” reaches #1 on the “Billboard” pop chart

2005 [08] Coldplay’s “ X&Y” album reaches #1 in 22 countries worldwide

1994 [19] 1st ‘World Cup’ of soccer held in the USA opens in Chicago (eventually won by Brazil)

1990 [23] After 8 days of work, 12 students in Singapore complete a pyramid built from 263,810 bottle caps

[Tues] “The Voice” season finalé (NBC/CTV)
[Tues] International Sushi Day
[Wed] “O Music Awards” (MTV)
[Wed] World Sauntering Day
[Thurs] Recess at Work Day
[Thurs] World Refugee Day

Meet a Mate Week / Old Time Fiddlers Week / Universal Fathers Week


Highlight bits culled from 20 years of “Bull Sheet” back issues …
• For $3,000, 25% of people surveyed would sell their best friend’s deepest secret.
• For $10,000, 59% would shave their head.
• For $100,000, 22% would fight a heavyweight boxer.
• For $1 million, 60% would take the rap for somebody else and serve 6 months in jail.
• For $10 million, 25% would abandon all their friends; 7% would commit murder.
– First published in “BS” 2002.

✗ Still trying to untangle the Christmas lights from the Weed Whacker.
✗ Putting on last year’s swimsuit requires Vaseline and a shoehorn.
✗ Still confusing the Henry Cavill “Superman” with the Brandon Routh “Superman”.
✗ Used all your bikini wax to polish your hardwood floors during the Winter.
✗ Your belly has more rolls than Sara Lee.
✗ Still hungover from Spring Break.
– First published in “BS” 1997.

Just got a job playing triangle in a reggae band. It’s pretty easy, I just stand at the back and ting.

• Bad British commentary makes baseball so much better …
• The ever useful “Number Two Guide” has now provided us with an online ‘Poop Calculator’. Simply enter your birth date to get your (very) personal stats …

☎ A high-profile NYC restaurant has just banned tipping completely; others have replaced the obligatory gratuity with a fixed optional service charge. Is discretionary tipping due to disappear? And why do people tip anyway? Experts say it’s to …
✓ Gain social approval.
✓ Avoid guilt.
✓ Reward good service.
✓ Increase servers’ incomes.
✓ Buy future service (if returning).
✓ Ingratiate server.
– Sourced from

Question: Half of people polled say that if they could go back in time, they would change THIS.
Answer: They would travel more.

A curved line is the loveliest distance between two points.

A big moo out to Roger, Darren & Marilyn @ 104.5 CHUM FM Toronto, who just re-upped for a 20th year of “BS” service; welcome aboard to the Jim Pattison Group of Alberta stations: Big 105 [CHUB] Red Deer AB, 106.7 The Drive [CFDV] Red Deer AB, Big West Country [CIBW] Drayton Valley AB, B94 [CHBW] Rocky Mountain House AB; and we salute samplers this week who include Robert Golomboski @, and Kev Starr @ Spitfire Radio, Birmingham UK.

Printer Friendly Version