Monday, June 18, 2012        Edition: #4767

Ah, the Sweet Smell of BS!

WEEKEND TABLOID & BLOG BS:
• Former Pussycat Dolls singer Nicole Scherzinger is replacing Kelly Rowland as a full-time judge on the UK version of TV talent show “The X Factor” (ITV). 33-year-old Scherzinger was a judge on the US verison in 2011 before being let go; she’s twice appeared as a guest judge on the UK version. She takes on her new role today as auditions for the show are held in Newcastle. (Simon Cowell fires you from one show, then condescends to hire you back for another … where’s your pride, girl?)
– Telegraph.co.uk
• Filming on the upcoming movie musical “Les Miserables” has been delayed after Sacha Baron Cohen lost his voice. The funnyman plays thief ‘Monsieur Thenardier’ in the Tom Hooper film, which also stars Hugh Jackman & Anne Hathaway, but the shoot has been pushed back to allow Cohen time to rest his vocal cords. (There may be those who hope his voice-loss is permanent.)
– TheSun.co.uk
• The estates of Jimi Hendrix and Jim Morrison (The Doors) are considering holographic performances from the late music icons, according to Jeff Jampol, who manages both estates. Hopefully, he says, a virtual ‘Jim Morrison’ will be able to walk right up to you, look you in the eye, sing right at you, then turn around and walk away. Janie Hendrix, sister of Jimi and President/CEO of Experience Hendrix, says she’s been working for a year with Musion Systems to create a virtual ‘Jimi’. (Next they’ll be making virtual Biebers so he can become an entire boy-band.)
– Billboard.com
• Lindsay Lohan took to Twitter on Saturday in an attempt to humorously sidetrack speculation on why paramedics were called to her hotel room. The incident on Friday set the Internet buzzing with unconfirmed reports she’d been rushed to hospital. Her spokesman has since denied she was hospitalized, claiming she was treated at the hotel for ‘exhaustion and dehydration’. (Which can be common symptoms of drug abuse … we’re just sayin’.)
– Reuters.com
• And actor Nicholas Read, who played a goblin in the first “Harry Potter” film, has admitted to exposing himself on a train … for the 2nd time. The 41-year-old dwarf, who also appeared as an ‘Ewok’ in “Star Wars VI”, flashed a student on a train to Manchester, England, then took a picture of her horrified friend on a cellphone. The offence puts him in breach of a 20-week suspended jail sentence for a similar incident in 2010, meaning he now faces imprisonment. (This wee person obviously has a wee-wee problem.)
– ContactMusic.com

TODAY’S SHOW BIZ SKED:
• “Conan” (TBS/CTV) – The Spring Standards (“yellow/gold”).
• Electric Burma: A Concert for Aung San Suu Kyi (Dublin, Ireland) – A celebration of the Nobel Peace Prize recipient and leader of the National League for Democracy in Burma. U2’s Bono presents Aung San Suu Kyi with Amnesty International’s ‘Ambassador of Conscience Award’. Performers include Bob Geldof, Damien Rice, Lupe Fiasco, and more.
• “Ellen DeGeneres Show” (syndicated/CTV2) – Snow Patrol (“Fallen Empires”). Rerun.
• “Jimmy Kimmel Live” (ABC/CHCH) – Goodie Mob (“Age Against the Machine”). Rerun.
• “Last Call With Carson Daly” (NBC) – Lee Fields & The Expressions (“Faithful Man”). Rerun.
• “Late Night With Jimmy Fallon” (NBC/CTV2) – Fiona Apple (“The Idler Wheel Is Wiser Than the Driver Of the Screw & Whipping Cords Will Serve You More Than Ropes Will Ever Do”).
• “Late Show With David Letterman” (CBS/NTV/Omni1) – The Pierces (“Light Of the Moon”).
• “Tavis Smiley” (PBS) – Glen Hansard (“Rhythm & Repose”).
• “Tonight Show With Jay Leno” (NBC/CTV2) – Glen Hansard again (“Rhythm & Repose”).

BS MUSIC NOTES:
• Adele – Her album “21”, which has again floated to the top of the album sales chart for a 24th week, has now spent the most weeks at #1 since Prince & the Revolution’s Purple Rain soundtrack also managed 24 weeks atop the list in 1984-85.
• Alan Jackson – He’s debuted atop this week’s “Billboard” magazine ‘Country Albums’ chart with “Thirty Miles West”, his debut effort on his own label after spending his entire previous career on Arista.
• Jason Aldean – The RIAA has just issued a triple-Platinum certification for his “Dirt Road Anthem”, signifying digital sales of 3 million units.
• Justin Bieber – Today he releases his 2nd fragrance, “Girlfriend”, at Macy’s stores. Bieber’s “Someday” fragrance was the best-selling scent of 2011.
• Lady Gaga – She’ll be the cover model for the September issue of fashion magazine “Vogue”, focusing on the launch of her perfume.
• Mumford & Sons – They were forced to cancel 2 weekend festival appearances in Denmark and Sweden after guitarist Marcus Mumford broke his hand in an accident.
• Radiohead – Their Saturday concert at Toronto’s Downsview Park was cancelled after the stage collapsed, killing 1 crew member and injuring up to a dozen. It’s believed they were all members of the band’s tour crew. The Toronto date was to be the last of Radiohead’s 2012 North American tour. (OK seriously, what is the deal with stages falling down in the past year?)
• U2 – Saturday The Edge was accompanied by his bandmates at his mother’s funeral in Dublin, Ireland. Gwenda Evans passed away in her late 70s on June 11th after a brief illness. She served as a roadie for the group in the early days, picking up their gear in her orange VW.

NOT FOR SOAKING:

The dangerous new designer drug bath salts is sold online, in some mini-marts, and in head shops under names like ‘Ivory Wave’, ‘Vanilla Sky’, and ‘Bolivian Bath’. In the past year, there’s been a 1,000% increase in bath-salts related emergency calls per the American Association of Poison Control Centers. It’s main ingredient, MDPV (methylenedioxypyrovalerone), is a psychoactive drug used as a stimulant or weight-loss aid. So what’s the appeal? Besides hallucinations, paranoia, violent fits of rage, suicidal thoughts, and cannibalism, bath salts are also cheap. (If you know someone thinking about taking bath salts, ask if you can have their record collection beforehand.)
– Adapted from TheToiletPaper.com

WAYS TO GET FREE WI-FI ANYWHERE YOU GO:

We may not have that cloud of Wi-Fi covering the planet yet, but you can find free Wi-Fi almost anywhere if you know how to look. A few tips …
• Keep a list of hotels, businesses, and institutions that offer Wi-Fi. You might know about Starbucks and McDonalds, but there are many you might not think of: public libraries, courthouses, electronics stores, etc. Try the tag #freewifi; you might be surprised at how many places actually offer it with no strings attached.
• The hotspot database WeFi has a huge list of over 100 million Wi-Fi hotspots around-the-world, including rural areas you might not expect. They’ve also got apps for iPhone and Android, so you’re never without a search engine to find yourself a connection.
NET: http://www.wefi.com
• Free site browsing. Some companies offer limited access. Delta Airlines, for example, offers free access to Amazon, “People” magazine, and the “Wall Street Journal” in-flight. It won’t help you check your email, but you can certainly pass some time without spending a dime.
• Find some coupon codes. With a little foresight, you can rack up some coupons and have them ready when you need Wi-Fi access on-the-go. Sites like RetailMeNot are always great for finding vouchers.
• Wi-Fi from your cable company. You might not realize this, but if you subscribe to cable Internet at home, you probably have free access to all of their Wi-Fi hotspots around town. Check your provider’s website for a map of nearby hotspots.
• Tether your phone. If you have a 3G or 4G smartphone, there are ‘tethering’ apps for both iPhone and Android to create a connection to your computer. It’ll take a little preparation beforehand, but it works pretty much anywhere, so you’ll never be without Wi-Fi.
– Lifehacker.com

FAKIN’ IT:

Housebites.com, a British takeout food service that delivers restaurant-quality food, has announced a new innovation called ‘pretend you cooked’ that allows customers to more convincingly fake that they’ve slaved over a hot stove by delivering … the dirty pans alongside the food. Cooked by a professional chef and delivered to your door, Housebites main courses cost $16-to-$19, but now for an additional $8 customers can request the pans used to cook them for added authenticity. (And for another nominal fee, they’ll even allow you to clean them afterward!)
NET: http://www.housebites.com
– TheGlobeandMail.com

HOW TO ACTUALLY GET THINGS DONE IN VIRTUAL MEETINGS:

✓ Start the meeting beforehand. Sending supporting information before the meeting can often help save you time during the meeting, since everyone is already briefed on the basics.
✓ Set a schedule of speakers. When you’re planning out your agenda, assign a few speaking slots and make sure that your speakers know what they need to cover.
✓ Use a group video chat so that everyone is actually ‘present’. Seeing everyone’s face will bring energy to the meeting and help make sure no one is on their phone or emailing.
✓ Stick to the agenda. Designate someone to lead the meeting and hold that person accountable for moving the meeting along by making sure everyone stays on-topic.
✓ Tell participants the clock is ticking. Put a time limit on each subject of the agenda and ruthlessly cut off rambling.
✓ Follow up afterward. Make sure to end the meeting with a list of follow-up tasks and have someone distribute them by email to the entire team.
– VB.com

DID YOU KNOW?
The median family in America suffered a 39% fall in wealth between 2007 and 2010.
– PopBitch.com

BS CHRONOMETER 06.18.12


TODAY’S CELEBIRTHDAYS . . .
1942 [70] (Sir) Paul McCartney, Liverpool UK, rock billionaire (Wings-“Uncle Albert/Admiral Halsey”, Beatles-“Let it Be”)/Rock & Roll Hall of Fame (1999)

1942 [70] Roger Ebert, Urbana IL, syndicated TV & newspaper film critic (“Ebert Presents: At the Movies”, “Ebert & Roeper”/”Chicago Sun-Times”)/Hollywood Walk of Fame (2005)

1956 [56] Brian Benben, Winchester VA, TV actor (‘Dr Sheldon Wallace’ on “Private Practice” since 2008)

1971 [41] Nathan Morris, Philadelphia PA, oldies singer (Boyz II Men-“I’ll Make Love to You”, “End Of the Road”)

1976 [36] Blake Shelton, Ada OK, country singer (“Drink On It”, “Honey Bee”)/TV personality (“The Voice” since 2011)

1978 [34] Steven Chen, LA CA, indie rock guitarist (Airborne Toxic Event-“Changing”, “Sometime Around Midnight”)

TODAY’S BS REASONS TO PARTY . . .

• “Autistic Pride Day”, an annual celebration of the ‘neuro-diversity’ of people on the autism spectrum that’s designed to shift views of autism from ‘disease’ to ‘difference’.

• “Go Fishing Day” which, if you can pull it off, would allow you to post a sign on your door saying ‘Gone Fishing’. Work, after all, is for people who don’t know how to fish.

• “International Picnic Day” a great time to enjoy a meal ‘al fresco’, or if you don’t know him … anyone else you choose. It’s a pseudo-holiday for humans but a regular working day for ants.

• “International Sushi Day”, the 3rd annual conceived originally as a Facebook page. Quote: “Every day should be Sushi Day, but like anything that is this amazing, it deserves a day unto itself.” The only requirement for celebration … eat sushi.
NET: http://bit.ly/10Xizp

• “Ride to Work On Your Motorcycle (or Scooter) Day”, an annual observance advocating the use of motorcycles & scooters for commuter transportation. (Hell’s Angels do this every day … what environmentalists!)
NET: http://www.ridetowork.org

• “Splurge Day”, when we’re encouraged to go out and do something indulgent. (Don’t go overboard, because tomorrow is ‘Return Everything You Bought on Splurge Day’.)

TODAY’S FIRST . . .

1905 [107] The wooden chair that’s become a symbol of Summer, the ‘Adirondack Chair’, is patented by Harry Bunnell of Westport NY (in Canada, it’s known as the ‘Muskoka Chair’)

TODAY’S MUSIC EVENTS . . .
1967 [45] Jimi Hendrix wows concert-goers by setting his guitar afire to close the storied Monterey Pop Festival in California

2011 [01] Clarence Clemons, saxophonist for Bruce Springsteen & The E Street Band, dies at age 69 from complications related to a stroke

TODAY’S RECORDS . . .
1992 [20] Italian police arrest a man for stealing 17-thousand little bars of hotel soap

2000 [12] Tiger Woods wins the US Open Golf Championship by a record 15 strokes

AND REMEMBER . . .

[Tues] World Sickle Cell Day
[Tues] World Sauntering Day
[Wed] 2012 NHL Awards (Las Vegas)
[Wed] Rolling Stones 50th anniversary
[Wed] World Refugee Day
[Wed] Summer Solstice
[Wed] Daylight Appreciation Day

THIS WEEK IS . . .

Meet a Mate Week / Old Time Fiddlers Week / Universal Fathers Week

BULL’S BITS


BEST OF BS:
A highlight bit culled from 19 years of “Bull Sheet” back issues …
BS USES FOR EARWAX:
• Natural-scented candles.
• Spread it on paper scraps to make instant Post-It Notes.
• Inexpensive blonde highlights.
• Low-carb alternative to boogers.
• Sister repellent.
– First published in “BS” 2004.
NET: http://www.FreeRadioPrep.com

BS PHONE STARTER:

☎ What’s your secret to knocking off a ‘to do’ list? (A LinkedIn survey finds that just 11% regularly accomplish all the tasks on their daily to-do lists. The biggest reason is distraction from email, impromptu meetings, and phone calls. Our suggestion: Begin your list with ‘Make a List’, then immediately check that off.)

BS RANDOM JOKE:

Jogging helps you forget your problems by allowing you to focus on the physical pain .

BS U-PICK TRIVIA:

Which would you find in Krakow, Poland?
a. Bono High School
b. Mick Jagger Elementary School
c. Paul McCartney Kindergarten [CORRECT]
– Halife.com

BS WATER COOLER QUESTION:
Question: In a recent fashion poll, THIS article of clothing was picked as the item women should never wear.
Answer: Overalls.

BS DEEP THOUGHT:

A smile is a curve that can set a lot of things straight.

NEW SHEETERS WHO WILL PROSPER:
Jeff Murray @ EZ Rock [CKCR] Revelstoke BC; Lee Wardle @ The Voice, Devon UK; Clint James @ The Wolf [CJCI] Prince George BC; Charlie Springfield @ Grace FM [WAFG] Ft Lauderdale FL; Tori Hodgman @ 101.7 Ho-FM Hobart, Australia; Mike Lane @ Mix 106 [KSUP] Juneau AK; and Todd Logan @ Classic Rock 104.5 [KPUS] Corpus Christi TX.


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