Wednesday, March 3, 2010        Edition: #4210
100% Grade A Bull!


After months of speculation about “Glee” hitting the road with a live stage show, FOX-TV has officially announced “The Glee Live! In Concert!” tour will kick off in Arizona May 18th (the good news is, virtually every cast member will participate; the bad news, they’re only scheduled to perform in 4 cities – Phoenix, LA, Chicago, and NYC) . . . 31-year-old rapper Trina says she’s ‘devastated’ after learning nude photos from a cellphone she lost last month have leaked online (this ‘promotion’ is meant to cure the problem of so many people asking, “Who the hell is Trina?”) . . . “Us Weekly” has confirmed reality TV whiner Kate Gosselin (“Jon & Kate Plus 8”) is joining the next season of “Dancing With the Stars” (she’s never, ever going to go away, is she?) . . . 44-year-old actor Rainn Wilson has revealed that his alter ego on “The Office” (NBC), ‘Dwight Schrute’, is about to become involved with ‘multiple’ love interests (some of them not farm animals) . . . The brilliant cut diamond engagement ring that Simon Cowell has given fiancée Mezhgan Hussainy is said to be approximately 6 carats and worth an estimated $750,000 (what a cheapo – he makes $50 million-plus a year!) . . . 29-year-old reality TV star Kim Kardashian (“Keeping Up With the Kardashians”) has purchased a hefty Beverly Hills CA crib, a $4.8-million, 5-bedroom manse that boasts a media room, pool, outdoor living-dining room, and privacy walls to keep out pesky paparazzi (not bad for a future Sephora employee) . . . And moviemaker James Cameron has announced he plans to re-release his 1997 blockbuster “Titanic” in 3-D in the Spring of 2012, to mark the 100-year anniversary of the doomed ship’s sailing (and further his ambition to be ‘King of the World’ by having enough money to buy it).


• “American Idol” (FOX/CTV) – The top 10 male semi-finalists perform.
• “The Hour” (CBC) – Chubby Checker (“The Twist”).
• “Jimmy Kimmel Live” (ABC/CityTV) – Jet (“Shaka Rock”).
• “Late Night With Jimmy Fallon” (NBC/A Channel) – Erykah Badu (“New Amerykah Part Two”)
• “Live With Regis & Kelly” (syndicated/CTV) – Corinne Bailey Rae (“The Sea”).
• “Lopez Tonight” (TBS) – T-Pain (“RevolveR”).
• “Tonight Show With Jay Leno” (NBC/A Channel) – Avril Lavigne (“Alice”).


• Alexisonfire – They’ve released a free iPhone App that allows fans to watch videos, follow the band’s Twitter posts, and view the latest concert dates and photos.
• Beyoncé – She’s decided she no longer needs her alter ego, ‘Sasha Fierce’, to enable her to perform wild stage moves without being inhibited. She tells “Allure” magazine, “Sasha Fierce is done. I killed her.”
• Billy Talent – Tonight they kick off a 19-city, 26-day cross-Canada tour in Victoria BC. Also on the bill: Alexisonfire, Against Me!, and Cancer Bats.
• Christina Milian – She & music producer The-Dream are celebrating the birth of their first child together, a daughter they’ve named Violet.
• Darryl Worley – Today in his hometown of Savannah TN groundbreaking takes place on the Darryl Worley Cancer Treatment Center which will open by early 2011. The “Awful, Beautiful Life” singer’s charity foundation is raising money for the project.
• Garth Brooks – He’s quickly sold out his new run at the Wynn in Las Vegas. Tickets for shows scheduled March through August went on sale Saturday.
• Lady Antebellum – They lead nominations for the 45th “Academy of Country Music Awards” announced Tuesday with 7, including ‘Album Of the Year’ and ‘Top Vocal Group’.
• Lady Gaga – According to Live Nation, she’ll return to North America in June for a 30-city arena tour, with dates to be announced soon.
• Nickelback – They’ve extended the “Dark Horse World Tour” into June. The 2-month add-on begins in Atlantic City NJ April 3rd and ends in Vancouver BC June 3rd.
• Paul McCartney – He’s announced 4 outdoor UK shows for this Summer, including the Isle of Wight Festival; Hampden Park in Glasgow, Scotland; Hyde Park in London; and his first show in Cardiff, Wales in 3 decades.


A BS breakdown of who we are and what we do …
• 75% of us have either been involved in or witnessed some form of jealousy in the workplace.
• 60% of men have spit in public. Women?
• 24% of women would like to change their man’s hairstyle.
• 18% of us twist our Oreos apart before eating them.
• 11% of drivers are talking on their phones at any given time.
• 7% of us have flossed our teeth … with our hair.

New terms leaking into the lingo …
• ‘Bing’ – A trendy new term for jail or prison, as in “For the next year Lil Wayne will be in the bing, so it’s best if he doesn’t wear any bling.”
• ‘Evolutionary Fitness’ – A modern-day subculture that follows aspects of the Stone Age lifestyle in order to become healthier. Among the activities adopted from our early ancestors: eating lots of meat, bathing in icy water, and jogging barefoot.
• ‘Libel Tourist’ – Someone who sues for libel in a foreign country because it has libel laws that are more favorable to their cause. (“I’m suing you in Saudi Arabia so they’ll cut off your hand!”)


MIT scientists have created a new infrared laser made from germanium that can operate at room temperature. The cutting-edge research removes the need for cryogenic cooling systems previously used for infrared lasers and could lead to powerful computer chips that operate at the speed of light. What’s this mean to us average folks? Eventually we could have the computing power of today’s supercomputers inside our laptops. (Cool. Faster bidding on eBay.)


• We actually sleep better than we think we do. A recent University of Maryland study finds we’re getting just as much sleep nowadays as folks did 40 years ago.
• We need less sleep as we age. While it’s thought that school-age kids need circa 9 hours per night, seniors can get by on much less.
• Multiple, shorter sleep sessions rather than one long one are an option. This so-called ‘polyphasic’ sleep is common in babies, the elderly, as well as other members of the animal kingdom.
• EEGs show that most of us experience 2 alertness dips each day – one at night-time and the other at mid-day. That’s why feeling the need for an afternoon ‘desk nap’ is normal and can actually be good for you.
• A good night’s sleep is within reach of most of us if we exercise regularly but not right before bedtime, go to bed at the same time nightly, and refrain from caffeine, heavy or spicy foods, and alcohol for 4-to-6 hours before bed-time.


Neuro-scientists at California’s UCLA have found that, as we age, our brain’s reaction time slows and our ability to multi-task diminishes. But maturity also brings an enhanced ability to reason out problems and to empathize. And the middle-aged brain can still strengthen neuron circuits associated with memory and decision-making. The bottom line, according to the new research: The aging brain may be less quick, but it’s more shrewd. (Proof that wisdom is learned?)


Men who regularly take over-the-counter painkillers are twice as likely to suffer hearing problems as those who don’t, a new study shows. Researchers have found that younger men are particularly at risk. For instance, taking acetaminophen (such as Tylenol) at least twice a week doubles the risk of mild to severe deafness before the age of 50. Other painkillers, including aspirin and ibuprofen (as in Advil), are also linked to hearing loss, the Harvard University researchers have found. (“I said IS YOUR HEADACHE GONE YET?”)


A newly-developed skin-based interface effectively turns your body into a touchscreen. Called ‘Skinput’, the system beams a keyboard or menu onto the user’s forearm from a projector housed in an armband. An acoustic detector analyses the ultralow-frequency sound produced by tapping the skin with a finger, then calculates which part of the display you want to activate. Most volunteers who have tested the system have found it easy to navigate through icons on the forearm and tap their fingers to actuate commands. (“License and registration, please. Were you using your arm while driving?”)


• 50 volunteers in Buffalo NY have constructed the ‘World’s Largest Ice Maze’ for the 2010 “Buffalo Powder Keg Winter Festival”. Measuring 12,856 sq ft, the new “Guinness World Record” maze features glowing blue lights and a giant buffalo (the animal) at its center. It breaks the old record of 8,280 sq ft set in 2005 in Toronto.
• This week some 5,200 naked people embraced each other on the steps of Sydney, Australia’s iconic Opera House for a photoshoot by Spencer Tunick, who is known for his nude group photos in public spaces.
– Associated Press
• 10 years ago 37-year-old San Francisco CA software millionaire Charles Veley decided he wanted to ‘go everywhere’. He ticked off the last of the 193 UN-recognized nations 8 years ago and is now working to visit all of the world’s 871 islands and atolls, provinces and protectorates – something that’s never been done by an individual. He’s now made it to 806 of them. His big discovery? Wherever you go, no matter how small … there’s always a bar.
– “The Observer”

Fresh green chili peppers contain more Vitamin C than oranges.
– Chili Institute


1958 [52] Miranda Richardson, Southport UK, movie actress (“The Phantom Of the Opera”, “The Hours”)

1971 [39] Brett Warren, Tampa FL, country singer (Warren Bros-“She Wants To Rock”, w/Sara Evans-“That’s The Beat Of a Heart”)

1982 [28] Jessica Biel, Ely MN, movie actress (“Valentine’s Day”, “I Now Pronounce You Chuck & Larry”)/former TV actress (“7th Heaven” 1996-2006)  COMING UP: “The A-Team”, opening June 11th.

1984 [26] Joe ‘Blower’ Garvey, Oklahoma City OK, rock guitarist (Hinder-“Use Me”, “Lips Of an Angel”)

• “Doll’s Festival” (“Hinamatsuri”) in Japan, a time to give thanks for the health & well being of daughters. Homes with young girls set up a display of dolls surrounded by peach blossoms, specially-colored diamond-shaped rice cakes, and white sake.

• “I Want You to Be Happy Day”, a day to show love, care and concern for others … for once. (Tomorrow is ‘Get Real, Loser, I Was Only Kidding Day’.)


1990 [20] “Escapade” by Janet Jackson hits #1 on pop singles charts

1998 [12]  Faith Hill releases mega-hit single “This Kiss”


1875 [135] By some accounts, the 1st recorded ‘Hockey Game’ is played in Montréal

1919 [91] 1st ‘International Air Mail Service’, between Seattle WA and Victoria BC


2005 [05] Steve Fossett becomes the only person to fly an airplane around-the-world solo, without stops or refuelling (his ‘Virgin Atlantic Global Flyer’ lands at Salina KS after 67 hours, 2 minutes, 38 seconds)


[Thurs] International Scrapbooking Day
[Thurs] March Forth & Do Something Day
[Thurs] Grammar Day
[Fri] “Alice in Wonderland”; “Brooklyn’s Finest” open in movie theaters
[Fri] Salesperson Day
[Sun] 82nd Academy Awards
This Week Is … Sleep Awareness Week
This Month Is … Music In Our Schools Month


This week is “National Procrastination Week”.
• If at first I don’t succeed, there’s always next year.
• I shall never move quickly, except to avoid more work or find excuses.
• I believe that if anything is worth doing, it would have been done already.
• I will never put off until tomorrow what I can forget about forever.


What’s the key to success in life? Why do you say that?


• Whyzit no one has ever measured the ‘speed of dark’?
• Whyzit that something called a ‘trailer’ precedes a movie?
• Whyzit called ‘common sense’ if hardly anyone uses it?
• Whyzit nickels are bigger than dimes?
• Whyzit we call it a ‘witness stand’ when the witness is always sitting down?

• According to research in “New Woman” magazine, a man’s worst day of the week is Monday, due to back-to-work pressures. Which is a woman’s worst day of the week?
a. Monday as well.
b. Friday. [CORRECT. Tired after the work-week but still facing a weekend of household chores and child care.]
c. Saturday.

• In 15th-century England, what color was believed to be a fever reducer?
a. Red [CORRECT. The sick wore red underwear and surrounded themselves with red objects.]
b. Blue
c. White

• In which position do most of us sleep?
a. On our stomachs.
b. On our side. [CORRECT. Surveys show 2-out-of-3 people sleep on their side.]
c. On our backs.

Strange watching the Academy Awards … little statues made out of metal being handed out to people made out of plastic.


Today’s Question: The more optimistic you are, the more likely you are to have one of THESE.
Answer to Give Out Next Show: A will and/or retirement plan. (

There is always one more imbecile than you counted on.

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