Friday, March 12, 2010        Edition: #4217
We’ve Got Our Sheet Together!


Harmonix has announced that the updated videogame “Rock Band 3” is being readied for worldwide release later this year, just in time for the holiday season (better start saving, mom) . . . “Consequence of Sound” reports that the 2010 headliners for the “Lollapalooza Music Festival” (August 6-8 in Chicago) will be Arcade Fire, Green Day, Lady Gaga, Phoenix, Soundgarden, and The Strokes . . . The makers of ‘Barbie’ are launching a new line of collectible dolls based on characters from TV’s “Mad Men” (AMC), including executive ‘Don Draper’, his wife ‘Betty’, his ad agency partner ‘Roger Sterling’, and bombshell office manager ‘Joan Holloway’ (priced at just under $75, they aren’t aimed at kids!) . . . According to “LA Times”, not one but two movie remakes of “The Wizard of Oz” are in the works, one to feature ‘Dorothy’s granddaughter; the other being produced by Temple Hill Entertainment, which has made a killing with the “Twilight Saga” (featuring the ‘Wicked Vampire Of the West’?) . . . Actor Robert Pattinson says he doesn’t ask girls out, preferring to hold back and let them make the first move; he also reveals that, like his “New Moon” co-star Taylor Lautner, he was beaten up a lot when he was younger (the prime motivation to chase fame – revenge!) . . . FOX-TV execs are expected to make a decision within a week on whether to axe the Keifer Sutherland series “24” after the current season (the guy’s been running around dodging bullets for 8 straight days – he’s tired!) . . . And the life of troubled late “Playboy” model Anna Nicole Smith is being turned into an opera, appropriately titled “Anna Nicole”, which will debut at London’s Royal Opera House next February (it’s never over until the fat lady O-Ds).


• “Celebrity Apprentice” (NBC/Global) – Sunday Donald Trump hosts the 2-hour season 3 premiere. Among the ‘celebrities’ participating: disgraced former Illinois governor Rod Blagojevich; talent agent Sharon Osbourne; former baseball player Darryl Strawberry; comedian Sinbad; 1980s pop singer Cyndi Lauper; and former Poison lead singer Bret Michaels.
• “Friday Night Alright” (VH1) – Tonight U2.
• “GLAAD Media Awards” (NYC/LA) – Saturday it’s the 21st annual media honors for ‘fair, accurate and inclusive representations of the lesbian, gay, bisexual & transgender  community’. “Glee”, “Mad Men”, and “Modern Family” are among TV nominees; music nominees include Lady Gaga and Adam Lambert.
• “Jimmy Kimmel Live” (ABC/CityTV) – Tonight a rerun of his post-Academy Awards special.
• “Last Call With Carson Daly” (NBC) – Tonight Lily Allen (“It’s Not Me, It’s You”).
• “Late Night With Jimmy Fallon” (NBC/A Channel) – Vampire Weekend (“Contra”).
• “Late Show With David Letterman” (CBS) – Tonight Drive-By Truckers (“Big To-Do”).
• “Nowhere Boy” – Saturday Sam Taylor Wood’s John Lennon biopic has its Canadian premiere at Toronto’s Royal Cinema during “Canadian Music Week”. The pic stars newcomer Aaron Johnson as Lennon. The Canadian premiere of “When You’re Strange”, a documentary about The Doors narrated by Johnny Depp, opens the double bill.
• “Saturday Night Live” (NBC/Global) – Actor Jude Law hosts; Pearl Jam is musical guest.
• “Tonight Show With Jay Leno” (NBC/A Channel) – Tonight Katharine McPhee (“Unbroken”).


• Amy Winehouse – The immensely talented but oh-so-messed-up Brit singer who hasn’t recorded in 4 years now is reportedly planning to re-marry her ex-hubby, Blake Fielder-Civil, in Las Vegas as soon as they get the all-clear from authorities. She was previously denied a US visa for possessing cannabis & assaulting a fan.
• Coldplay – They’ve debuted a new song during the South American leg of their soon-to-wrap “Viva La Vida” tour. Titled either “Don Quixote” or “Spanish Rain”, it’s a tribute to their Spanish-speaking fan base and features a sing-along chorus consisting entirely of ‘olés’.
• The Dears – After singer/guitarist Patrick Krief left to form the Black Diamond, it seemed unlikely he’d return. But now he’s indeed back, and co-writing the band’s upcoming 5th album.
• Jimi Hendrix – In the video for “Bleeding Heart”, from the just-released “Valleys Of Neptune” album, filmmaker Julien Temple has created a fantasy world in which Hendrix performs at the legendary “Glastonbury Festival” in Somerset, England.
• Lady Antebellum – Their smash album “Need You Now” shows no signs of slowing down, returning to the top of the “Billboard” chart after 3 weeks in the #2 spot.
• Madonna – She’s announced she’s starting her own ‘fashion empire’ to be known as ‘MG Icon’.
• Vampire Weekend – Sunday the indie rockers kick off the North American leg of their “Contra” tour in Edmonton. The trek winds up in Oakland CA April 19th.
• White Stripes – Tonight “Under Great White Northern Lights”, the documentary film that captures their incredible cross-country Canadian tour, makes its US premiere at the “South-By-Southwest Music Conference” in Austin TX. The DVD version is out Tuesday.


• “Green Zone” ( R-Rated Action Thriller ): Matt Damon gets back together with “Bourne Ultimatum” director Paul Greengrass to play a rogue US Army officer on the hunt for weapons of mass destruction in an unstable region. Is this the 4th ‘Bourne’ adventure disguised in military fatigues? Co-stars Jason Isaacs, Greg Kinnear. Shot in Spain & Morocco.
• “Our Family Wedding” ( PG-13 Comedy ): America Ferrera (“Ugly Betty”) & Lance Gross (“House of Payne”) play a young couple whose wedding plans are being hampered by their feuding fathers (Forest Whitaker, Carlos Mencia). Sort of a Tyler Perry-style film … only without Perry’s involvement.
• “Remember Me” ( PG-13 Romantic Drama ): Robert Pattinson (“Twilight Saga”) & Emilie de Ravin (“Lost”) play new lovers, each dealing with the loss of a family member. Co-stars Lena Olin, Pierce Brosnan. Reportedly a difficult NYC shoot, given the thousands of fans who tracked R-Pattz’s every move.
• “She’s Out of My League” ( R-Rated Romantic Comedy ): Little-known Jay Baruchel plays an average Joe who meets the perfect woman (little-known Alice Eve), but his lack of confidence and the influence of friends & family begin to chip away at the relationship. Get your own personal ‘rating’ on a scale of 1-to-10 at the official website …


A new survey of over 3,000 expatriates from 50 countries has found that Australia ranks highest as a new home. With its beaches and outdoor lifestyle, it was voted the best environment for healthy and active children. Expat kids living Down Under also find it easier to make friends and ease into new school environments. Respondents rated their adopted homes on quality of childcare, education, ease of integration, costs of raising children, and time spent on outdoor activities. Singapore ranked 2nd overall. (If you had to live elsewhere, where would you go?)


The Electronic Frontier Foundation says those new ‘smart meters’ for energy use may put your privacy at risk. How so? The ebb and flow of gas and electricity into your home contains surprisingly detailed info about your daily life. Energy usage data, measured moment-by-moment, allows the reconstruction of a household’s activities: when you wake up, when you come home, when you go on vacation, maybe even when you take a hot bath. The lobby group is pushing for the adoption of strict regulations to protect the privacy and security of customers’ energy-usage information. (Beware of Peeping Toms ogling your kilowatt-hours!)


This week Google Maps has unveiled a new feature that’s being beta-tested which offers detailed bicycling directions, cycling lane maps and suggested bike routes. The new feature also includes a ‘Bicycling Layer’, which shows bike paths and bike-friendly streets with or without lanes. According to Google, it has also taken steps to avoid long uphill and downhill routes, busy roads, and treacherous intersections. (Now the big problem for cyclists will be crashing into a utility poll while gawking at Google.)


Scientists at Deakin University in Melbourne, Australia claim they’ve stumbled upon a 6th tastebud … fat. Along with sweet, sour, salty, bitter, and umami (essentially, the ability to detect protein), the researchers think we can also actually taste fat. In experiments, all participants could detect fat but some were better at it than others. Interestingly, the higher a person’s fat-tasting sensitivity, the fewer fatty foods they tended to eat, and the lower their Body Mass Index. The researchers think that’s because people who are sensitive to fat can taste very low concentrations of it, so they aren’t craving more. (Seems you’re either sensitive to fat or sensitive about your fat.)


In a mountainous area of China’s Guizhou province, elementary school children walk more than 2 hours each day, including a 400-meter (quarter-mile) trek through a cave, in order to go to school. (Oh yeah? Well I remember when I was a kid …)


1946 [64] Liza Minnelli, Hollywood CA, self-possessed singer/stage & movie actress (Oscar-“Cabaret”)/youngest to ever win Tony Award at age 19/daughter of legendary singer-actress Judy Garland/4-time divorcée

1948 [62] James Taylor, Boston MA, oldies singer (“Fire & Rain”, “You’ve Got a Friend”)

1968 [42] Aaron Eckhart, Cupertino CA, movie actor (“The Dark Knight”, “No Reservations”)

Movie actor William H Macy (“Fargo”) is 60; TV actress Dana Delaney (“Desperate Housewives”) is 54; Rock bassist Adam Clayton (U2) is 50; Rapper Common (“Love Of My Life”) is 38; Movie actor Emile Hirsch (“Into the Wild”) is 25.

Movie actor Michael Caine (“The Dark Knight”) is 77; Composer/producer Quincy Jones (“We Are the World”) is 77; Comedian/actor Billy Crystal (“City Slickers”) is 62; Prince Albert II of Monaco is 52; TV actress Tamara Tunie (“Law & Order: SVU”) is 51; Country singer Kristian Bush (Sugarland) is 40.


• “Middle Name Pride Day”, so stand up and be proud … Alphonse and Gertrude.

• “Ear Muff Day”, celebrating the first ‘Earmuffs’ patented by one Chester Greenwood of Farmington, Maine on this day 133 years ago in 1877.
• “International Fanny Pack Day”, celebrating the strap-on pouch that is definitely not a ‘murse’. What do you need one for? To put your earmuffs in.
• “Maple Syrup Saturday”, a celebration of the running of the sap from which they make liquid gold. About 75% of the world’s supply is produced in the Canadian province of Québec.
• “Genealogy Day”, highlighting the study of ancestry and family histories. Got any deadwood in your family tree? Search your surname alphabetically here and find out …
• “Open an Umbrella Indoors Day”, when celebrants are encouraged to challenge the old superstition and note whether any bad luck befalls them. The superstition can be traced to the 11th century BC.

• “Daylight Saving Time” in North America begins at 2 am. For the past 3 years, the annual ‘Spring Forward’ has been moved forward from early April in an attempt to save energy. The semi-annual clock reset is also touted as a good excuse for “Check Your Batteries Day”, when you test and/or replace smoke alarm batteries.
• “Pi Day”, an annual observance for math geeks on March 14 (3.14).
• “Potato Chip Day”, honoring North America’s favorite snack food which was invented by chef George Crum on this day in 1853 at a Saratoga Springs NY resort after a diner complained the potato slices were too thick. As a joke, Crum sliced a new batch of spuds paper-thin, fried them in boiling oil and salted them. The fussy patron and his friends loved the ‘crunchy potato slices’ which soon became known as ‘Saratoga chips’.


1969 [41] Paul & Linda McCartney are wed

2007 [03] Van Halen is inducted into the Rock & Roll Hall of Fame (Eddie Van Halen misses the honor due to a stint in rehab)


1948 [62] 1st chapter of ‘Hell’s Angels Motorcycle Club’ is founded by a breakaway group of the ‘Pissed Off Bastards’ (no BS!) in San Bernardino CA

1969 [41] 1st ‘Bell-Bottom Jeans’ (Levi Strauss Co)


1993 [17] LPGA golfer Anne Marie Palli is penalized for hitting a flying duck and killing it, causing her ball to fall into a water hazard (hey, shouldn’t that be a ‘birdie’?)


[Mon] Buzzards Day
[Mon] Ides of March
[Mon] Napping Day
[Mon] True Confessions Day
[Mon] World Consumer Rights Day
[Mon] 25th Rock & Roll Hall of Fame Induction Ceremony (NYC)
This Week Is … World Clown Week
This Month Is … Workplace Eye Health & Safety Month


The new movie “She’s Out of My League” shoots down the concept of the geeky man-poodle or ‘moodle’ (women like to walk the moddle, feed the moodle, play with the moodle, but they never do the moodle). A few reasons this slightly geeky breed might make the best boyfriends …
• He’s capable of memorizing every line of “Star Wars” and “Lord Of the Rings” so he shouldn’t have trouble remembering your birthday and favorite kind of flowers.
• Sure, he may secretly want to get it on with his super hot neighbor, but knowing that you’re the hottest girl he’s ever been with will probably keep him from cheating.
• Geeks tend to be tech-savvy. Which means not only will he be able to fix a computer problem and upgrade your software, but he’ll actually enjoy doing it.
• Since he’s super-smart and probably already making a ton of money, he won’t think being a roadie for Vampire Weekend is a great ‘career opportunity’.
• He was probably bullied during high school so he’ll be sympathetic when you vent about the office bitch … and help you plot a plan to bring her down.
• He’ll never hog the bathroom while he’s manscaping.
– Excerpted from “Cosmopolitan”


What’s the most valuable thing you’ve ever picked out of the garbage?


If you lived in Monaco, what would you be called?
a. A Monacoan.
b. A Monacker.
c. A Monegasque. [CORRECT]
d. A rich bastard.


I have told you like a MILLION TIMES to quit exaggerating!


Today’s Question: On average, a woman has had THIS for about 14 years.
Answer to Give Out Next Show: A best friend.


At the end of the game, the king and the pawn go into the same bag.

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