Thursday, March 1, 2012        Edition: #4696

This is Where March Comes In Like a Bull!

BS SHOW BIZ BUZZ:
Tonight previews begin at Broadway’s Neil Simon Theatre of a new adaptation of Andrew Lloyd Webber’s rock opera “Jesus Christ Superstar” (this production was a smash at Ontario’s Stratford Shakespeare Festival in 2011) . . . Sorta-actress Megan Fox tells the new issue of “Cosmopolitan” that in order to have children with her ‘soul-mate’ Brian Austin Green she’s ready to give up her smoking hot bod’ (like is it one or the other?) . . . British royal in-laws Pippa Middleton and her brother (whose name we can never remember and/or cared to learn) are set to participate in a Swedish ski race (we’re guessing all the photos will be rear shots) . . . 29-year-old actress Anne Hathaway claims she’s not all sugar ‘n spice and is more like Lindsay Lohan than people realize (only with even buggier eyes) . . . Meantime, Lohan tells NBC-TV’s “Today” in a taped interview that she’s sober and has ‘become a homebody’ (pants on fire!) . . . Kelsey & Camille Grammar have finally settled their contentious custody case out of court, agreeing to a joint deal whereby their 2 kids continue to live with Camille but will ‘maintain meaningful contact’ with their father (BS translation: He lost) . . . 44-year-old actress Julia Roberts tells the April issue of “Vanity Fair” her kids have no idea that their mother is famous (the upcoming movie “Mirror, Mirror “ might not help matters) . . . Reports that Justin Timberlake & Jessica Biel will wed sometime this Summer remain unconfirmed, an insider commenting “He would never say, why would I?” (seems someone’s got cold feet) . . . Actress Natalie Portman’s jeweler has confirmed that it is, in fact, a wedding band she’s been sporting but says he can neither confirm nor deny her marriage to fiancé Benjamin Millepied (sounds like something that crawled out of the bathtub drain) . . . And rumors are flying that “Glee” co-stars Lea Michele & Cory Monteith may be a real-life item, or at least have become fans of cozy dinners together (likely a ruse – an on-screen-turned-off-screen couple is just the thing to keep us talking about a sinking show).

TODAY’S SHOW BIZ SKED:
• “American Idol” (ABC/CTV) – Audience votes and judges’ wild card picks determine the finalists.
• “Conan” (TBS/CTV) – Mona (“Mona”).
• “Ellen DeGeneres Show” (syndicated/CTV2) – Birthday boy Justin Bieber.
• “Jimmy Kimmel Live” (ABC/CHCH) – Nicki Minaj (“Pink Friday: Roman Reloaded”, out April 3rd).
• “Jimmy Kimmel Live After the Academy Awards Special” (ABC) – A primetime rerun of Sunday’s post-Oscars show, featuring Oprah Winfrey, Coldplay.
• “Last Call With Carson Daly” (NBC) – The Kills (“Midnight Boom”).
• “Late Night With Jimmy Fallon” (NBC/CTV2) – ‘Bruce Springsteen Week’ continues with Elvis Costello performing covers.
• “Late Show With David Letterman” (CBS/NTV/Omni1) – White Rabbits (“Milk Famous”, out March 6th).
• “Tonight Show With Jay Leno” (NBC/CTV2) – Chickenfoot (“Chickenfoot III”).

BS MUSIC NOTES:
• Buffalo Springfield – It looks like their planned reunion tour is not happening this year after all, according to guitarist/vocalist Richie Furay. Quote: “Neil [Young] is just fickle.” They played their first reunion show at Young’s “Bridge School Benefit” concert in 2010.
• Erykah Badu – Her performance scheduled for last night in Kuala Lumpur was cancelled after a government committee ruled she’s ‘an unsuitable role model for young Malaysians’. The problem … what appear to be temporary tattoos of the word ‘Allah’ on her bare shoulders in publicity pics. The body art is considered an insult to Islam.
• Foo Fighters – They have been forced to cancel this Friday’s show in Singapore because doctors say Dave Grohl needs to rest his voice. All dates on the band’s Asian tour may be affected by the condition.
• Kid Rock – This week he played a Michigan campaign rally for Mitt Romney but only after inviting the candidate to his home and talking to him for more than an hour about his intentions if he gets elected US president.
• Radiohead – This week they kicked off their 2012 tour in Miami, Florida and debuted 2 brand new songs: “Identikit” and “Cut a Hole”. They’ve also announced a new leg of touring, with 6 shows in Australia and New Zealand slated for November.
• U2 – Bassist Adam Clayton is suing the Bank of Ireland as well as Dublin accounting firm Gaby Smyth & Co, claiming his former Personal Assistant misappropriated circa $6.4 million of his funds over a 5-year period. He’s seeking nearly $7 million from the bank and $7.5 million from the accounting firm for alleged ‘negligence and breach of contract’.
• Uncle Kracker – Tonight his new “Hometown Tour” in support of his latest album gets underway in Macomb, Illinois.

COMING ATTRACTIONS:
A BS selection of movies in the making …
• “An Object of Beauty” – Amy Adams (“The Muppets”) will star and produce this adaptation of the novel by Steve Martin. Yep, that Steve Martin. The story follows a NYC art connoisseur who charms her way up the social ladder while getting tangled in romances with top artists.
• “Diana: Closely Guarded Secret” – Princess Diana’s life is set to be made into a movie, and film producer Stephen Evans is lining up a Hollywood actress to play the late British royal. The film will be based on her former bodyguard Ken Wharfe’s memoirs.
• “Harker” – Russell Crowe is in talks to star in this re-imagining of Bram Stoker’s “Dracula”. He’d play the title character, a tough London detective on the hunt for the ghoulish figure behind a string of gory murders. The film is being produced by Leonardo DiCaprio.
• “Motor City” – Dominic Cooper plays a small-time criminal who tries to win back the woman he loves (Amber Heard) in this revenge thriller. Gary Oldman is in talks to play the villain, a shady kingpin. The movie is set to start shooting in Berlin, Germany in April.
• “True Story” – Jonah Hill & James Franco star in this adaptation of Michael Finkel’s memoir about a writer who connects with a criminal who’s been using his identity while on the run. Hill’s “Moneyball” co-star Brad Pitt is producing the movie through his Plan B production company.
• Untitled Bin Laden Film – Joel Edgerton (“The Great Gatsby”) is set to star in this story about the hunt for terrorist leader Osama Bin Laden. His brother Nash Edgerton plays a Navy SEAL in the film, directed by Kathryn Bigelow (“The Hurt Locker”). Shooting starts in India this month.

LION OR LAMB?
“If March comes in like a lion, it goes out like a lamb” or vice versa. For those of us who live through volatile Spring weather, it’s an apt description of this month. This phrase has its origins with the constellations Leo, the Lion, and Aries, the ram or lamb. It has to do with the relative positions of these constellations in the sky at the beginning and end of the month. In the original poem containing the famous phrase, there is no ‘if’. Before global warming, March most often arrived on a cold, blustery wind. But nowadays, who knows?
– OkState.edu

OTHER MARCH WEATHER LORE:
✓ A dry March and a wet May? Fill barns and bays with corn and hay.
✓ As it rains in March so it rains in June.
✓ March winds and April showers bring forth May flowers.
– FarmersAlmanac.com

FAKING IT:
Canada’s Department of Foreign Affairs is now advising single women traveling alone in foreign countries to pretend they are married, by wearing a fake wedding band and/or carrying pictures of their ‘husband’ in order to avoid harassment. These are just 2 of the recommendations in a new publication called “Her Own Way – A Woman’s Safe-Travel Guide”. Quote: “Being seen as married will lower your profile and stave off uninvited advances.” (Apparently guys don’t have to go through the hassle of inventing marital status.)
– CBC.ca

FROM THE BS POLL VAULT:
A BS breakdown of who we are and what we do …
• 82% of men say it wouldn’t bother them if their partner’s friends didn’t like him.
• 64% of women using online dating sites lie about their weight by at least 5 lbs.
• 53% of men using online dating sites lie about their age by at least 1 year.
• 44% of us have difficulty falling asleep.
• 39% of workers have had a workplace romance.
• 15% of us have never been to a music concert.

TWEET SHEET:
If you use Twitter in the belief that your tweets to friends will quickly disappear into the ether, think again. As of this week, companies looking for a social media marketing advantage can access Twitter updates dating all the way back to January 2010, a time period considered ‘historical’ in social media terms, and well past the 30-day access limit previously available for searches. One company that will benefit is Datasift, a UK firm that provides tweet-based market research to clients looking to stay on top of evolving trends. (More privacy goes down the ol’ porcelain receptacle.)
– BBC News

BS AMAZING FACTS:
• Fashion models are extraordinarily tall, averaging 5-ft, 10-ins, taller than 99% of American women.
– “Psychology Today”
• Dr Dror (not a typo) Paley, a renowned orthopedic surgeon at St Mary’s Medical Center in West Palm Beach, Florida, performed 650 ‘leg-lengthening surgeries’ last year.
– ABC News

BS CHRONOMETER 03.01.12