Thursday, March 17, 2016        Edition: #5649

Top of The Sheet to You!

★ AMC has announced that it has renewed its “Breaking Bad” prequel/spin-off “Better Call Saul”. The network has ordered a 10-episode 3rd season of the drama starring Bob Odenkirk as troubled lawyer ‘Jimmy McGill’, who eventually will transform into “Breaking Bad’s” shady ‘Saul Goodman’. Series creators Vince Gilligan and Peter Gould will remain as showrunners for Season 3. “Better Call Saul earned 7 Emmy nominations in 2015, including one for ‘Outstanding Drama Series’.
★ Chad Michael Murray has been cast as iconic rock boss Sam Phillips in the small-screen adaptation of “Million Dollar Quartet”. The former “One Tree Hill” star will portray the Sun Records founder, who helped develop the careers of Elvis Presley, Johnny Cash, Jerry Lee Lewis, and Carl Perkins. “Million Dollar Quartet” chronicles the story of a 1956 jam session featuring Lewis, Cash, Perkins, and Presley. It’s being adapted for TV from the 2010 Tony Award-nominated musical of the same name. The 8-episode series is set to premiere in November and will coincide with the 60th anniversary of the fabled recording sessions.
★ Michelle Obama has enlisted female singers Zendaya, Missy Elliott, Kelly Rowland, Janelle Monae, Kelly Clarkson, Chloe & Halle, Jadagrace, and Lea Michele for a girl power anthem called “This is For My Girls”, penned by renowned songwriter Diane Warren. It’s part of the Obama administration’s Let Girls Learn initiative and the White House’s #62MillionGirls campaign. Meanwhile, the First Lady delivered her SXSW keynote address in Austin TX last night, and joined a panel featuring Diane Warren, Missy Elliott, and Sophia Bush, that was moderated by Queen Latifah.

• “American Idol” (FOX) – The top 5 finalists perform in hope of making it to the next round; Adam Lambert performs.
• “Jimmy Kimmel Live” (ABC/CityTV) – Flogging Molly (“Drunken Lullabies”).
• “Last Call With Carson Daly” (NBC) – Quilt (“Piaza”). Rerun.
• “Late Late Show With James Corden” (CBS/M3) – Elton John (“Wonderful Crazy Night”). Rerun.
• NCAA Basketball Tournament (CBS/TNT/TBS) TV coverage of the 2016 ‘March Madness’ gets underway.
• “Watch What Happens Live” (Bravo) – Seal (“7”).

• Cole Swindell – “You Should Be Here” will finally knock Thomas Rhett’s “Die a Happy Man” out of 1st place on next week’s ‘Billboard Country Songs’ chart.
• The Eagles – Speaking to the BBC, Don Henley has confirmed that following the death of Glenn Frey earlier this year, the Eagles are essentially done as a band. Quote: “I don’t think you’ll see us performing again.”
• Florida Georgia Line – Tonight they embark on their “Dig Your Roots Tour”, starting with the Houston Livestock Show & Rodeo at NRG Stadium. The tour runs through October 22nd in Atlanta GA. Cole Swindell, The Cadillac Three, and Kane Brown are opening the shows.
• Kix Brooks – He’s set to publish his first cookbook. “Cookin’ It With Kix: The Art of Celebrating & The Fun of Outdoor Cooking” is out August 30th through W Publishing Group. Written with long-time radio producer Donna Britt, it includes more than 100 recipes.
• Mumford & Sons – Ben Lovett and Global Citizen co-founder Hugh Evans are spearheading a collaborative album called “Metamorphoses”, to be released this Fall. Participating artists will create original songs using lyrics crowd-sourced from people worldwide, thereby raising awareness of global issues.
• Rihanna – She’s been giving fans free meet-and-greets by her tour bus after the past few shows on her “Anti World Tour”. In comparison, the only way to get a Justin Bieber meet-and-greet on his “Purpose World Tour” is by coughing up $2,000 for a VIP package.

A BS selection of movies in the making …
• “Indiana Jones 5” – 73-year-old Harrison Ford is set to reprise the iconic role with 69-year-old Steven Spielberg directing. Walt Disney Co has just announced that the 5th film in the series will open on July 19, 2019. Ford’s return is likely related to his success in resurrecting his other indelible character, ‘Han Solo’, in “Star Wars: The Force Awakens”.
• “Princess Diaries 3” – Moviemaker Garry Marshall and his leading lady Anne Hathaway are making royal plans for another movie in the series. The Oscar-winner first played the unlikely princess in 2001 and returned for a sequel in 2004. Those 2 films raked in over $300 million in worldwide box office. Production is on hold for now until the very pregnant actress gives birth.
• “To the Bone” – Prolific TV writer-producer Marti Noxon (“Buffy the Vampire Slayer, “Glee”, “UnREAL”) is set to make her feature film directing debut with this dark comedy about anorexia that’s inspired by her own experiences. Noxon suffered from the eating disorder  for about 5 years as a teenager, at one point weighing only 70 pounds.
• “Train Man” – 68-year-old Julia Roberts is set to play the lawyer of real-life criminal Darius McCollum who became infamous for stealing NYC subway trains and Greyhound buses at the age of 15. The legal drama charts his attempt to be acquitted of his crimes, which included impersonating transport authorities in order to gain access to trains and buses.
• “Where’s Waldo?” – Actor/producer Seth Rogen is reportedly in talks to make a live-action film based on the highly-popular ‘Waldo’ book series by Martin Handford that was first published in 1987. MGM acquired the rights to the long-gestating project in 2011. It is unclear if Rogen will star in the film or if another lead actor is being considered.

Japan’s Aichi prefecture is currently hiring 6 full-time ninjas. A neighboring prefecture already has a highly successful Ninja Museum, and Aichi wants to bring in tourists of its own. The ninja positions are open to anyone 18 or older. Applicants don’t need to speak Japanese provided they simultaneously love tourism and history while being physically fit and boast impressive acrobatic skills. But the job listing notes that: “A track record of killing people for money would not help your application.” Aichi’s professional ninjas will put on regular performances and give media appearances while bringing in about $1,600 per month. Applications are due by next Tuesday. (What character from your  childhood would you like to portray as a job?)
– “Quartz”

• Beamish (since 1792) … Order this and you’ll look less cliché on the Irish holiday.
• Guinness (since 1759) … Black, bitter, and the bomb. If you haven’t heard of it, you’re in a coma.
• Murphy’s (since 1856) … Chocolate-y stout, clean finish. Slam it, dammit!
• Smithwick’s (since 1710) … If you want to impress the fellas in the pub, say it right: ‘SMI-thix’.
• Water (since the dawn of time) … Really, you pussy? On St Patrick’s Day?
– Excerpted from “The Toilet Paper”

According to researchers at the University of Westminster in London UK, South Africa, Italy, and Portugal have the strictest parents. To come up with the ranking of parental paranoia, researchers have conducted interviews with over 18,000 children and a sampling of their parents in 16 countries. Defining strictness in terms of freedom, or the lack thereof, to do things like ride a bus or cross the street alone, it’s been found that Scandinavian countries, along with Germany, are the most laissez-faire. But in South Africa, 80% of parents think their kids would get hit by a car if they crossed the street alone. In Italy and Portugal, this figure is even higher. Family bonding might account for this. Italian and Portuguese kids are often out and about, but usually with their parents. (Remember ‘going out to play’ … outdoors?)

A Politico research has found that Donald Trump spouts a ‘misstatement’ of some sort every 5 minutes during his speeches. Analysis of 4.6 hours of Trump speeches from the past week using a fact-checking process has found more than 60 inaccuracies that are considered ‘mischaracterizations, exaggerations, or simply false.’  Meantime, a separate investigation suggests that when Donald Trump spends time on the campaign trail slamming greedy American firms for sending US jobs overseas, he is either a recent convert to the cause or a hypocrite. The report suggests many companies associated with Trump have done the same thing. Trump-branded items are now made in numerous foreign countries such as China and Bangladesh. (So, along with bad hair … forked tongue.)
– “Washington Post”

Our galaxy is past middle-age and stopped making new stars 8 billion years ago. (William Shatner was the last.)
– “New Scientist”


1951 [65] Kurt Russell, Springfield MA, movie actor (“The Hateful Eight”, “Furious 7”)/actress Goldie Hawn’s partner since 1983  COMING UP: “Fast 8”, and “Guardians Of the Galaxy Vol 2” (2017)

1955 [61] Gary Sinise, Blue Island IL, TV actor (‘Agent Jack Garrett’ in the new “Criminal Minds: Beyond Borders” spin-off that debuted last night, “CSI: NY” 2004-13)/movie actor (“Captain America: The Winter Soldier”, “Forrest Gump”)

1964 [52] Rob Lowe, Charlottesville VA, TV actor (“The Grinder” since 2015, “Parks & Recreation” 2010-15)/movie actor (“The Interview”, “Austin Powers”)

1967 [49] Billy Corgan, Chicago IL, rock singer-guitarist (Smashing Pumpkins-“Tarantula”, “1979”)

1973 [43] Keifer Thompson, Miami OK, country singer (Thompson Square-“If I Didn’t Have You”, “Are You Gonna Kiss Me or Not?”)

1978 [38] Geoff Sprung, Harrisonburg VA, country musician (Old Dominion-“Snapback”, “Break Up with Him”)

1990 [26] Hozier (Andrew Hozier-Byrne), Bray, Ireland, indie singer-songwriter (“From Eden”, “Take Me to Church”)

1988 [28] Grimes (Claire Boucher), Vancouver BC, electronica singer-songwriter-producer (“Flesh Without Blood”)/Artist Of the Year Webby Award (2013)/Electronic Album Juno Award (2013)

1992 [24] John Boyega, London UK, movie actor (‘Finn’ in “Star Wars: The Force Awakens”)

• “Clean Your Closet Day”. After all, would once-a-year kill ya? Sort it by junk, charity donations, giveaways to family & friends, and stuff that’s too small to wear anymore. More tips here …

• “Irish Coffee Day”, a celebration of the drink that simultaneously picks you up and knocks you down, timed to coincide with Ireland’s national day. Similarly, today is also “Corned Beef & Cabbage Day”, in honor of a favorite Irish dish.

• “St Patrick’s Day”, the Irish national holiday that began as a ‘solemn religious observance’ to honor St Patrick (389-461 AD), patron saint of Ireland. It’s a public holiday in Ireland, Montserrat, and the Canadian province of Newfoundland & Labrador. Some fast facts …
– It’s been an Irish holiday for 1,500 years; it was first celebrated in Canada in 1765 in Québec City.
– The world’s largest “St Patrick’s Parade” is in NYC where over a million spectators and 100,000 participants are expected. A tradition since 1762, the 2-mile parade lasts about 6 hours.
– Since 1965, the Chicago River has been dyed green for the “Chicago St Patrick’s Parade”, an idea conceived when a plumber was observed using green dye to trace leaks from a building.
– Green is associated with “St Patrick’s Day” because it’s the color of Spring, Ireland, and the shamrock.

• “Submarine Day”, celebrating the sandwich also known as a ‘hoagie’ or a ‘hero’.

2014 [02] Model, fashion designer, and long-time Mick Jagger girlfriend L’Wren Scott dies at age 49 in NYC, the victim of suicide

2000 [16] Shania Twain’s “Come On Over” album is certified for sales of 17 million copies, making it the best-selling solo album by a female artist to date

2008 [08] 62-year-old Ola Brunkert, former drummer with ABBA, is found dead with his throat cut at his home in Majorca, Spain after hitting his head against a glass door in the dining room (add this to the list of embarrassing ways to die)

2000 [16] Julia Roberts becomes the 1st actress ever to command $20 million for a movie, with the release of “Erin Brockovich”

2013 [03] The largest meteorite hits the Moon since NASA started observing the Moon in 2005

[Fri] Awkward Moments Day
[Fri] Forgive Mom & Dad Day
[Sat] Corn Dog Day
[Sat] International Sports Car Racing Day
[Sun] Spring arrives
[Sun] Proposal Day
This Week Is … Flood Safety Awareness Week
This Month Is … International Women’s Month


• “So you actually kissed the Blarney Stone? Tongue or no tongue?”
• “Come over to my place and I’ll show you my Lucky Charms.”
• “If you don’t sleep with me, the leprechauns have already won.”
• “I may not have 4 leaves, but if you pluck me I’ll bring you luck.”
• “Why don’t you come catch a leprechaun with me, maybe together we’ll get lucky.”
• “That’s a fine-lookin’ dram o’ whisky you be drinkin’, lass. It’d look so much better barfed up on me bedroom floor.”
• “How’d you like to help put the Irish Spring back into me shillelagh?”
• “Well, lass, we’re the only ones still standing. How about it?”
– Adapted from

What do you call a bulletproof Irishman? Rick O’Shea.

• True or false – St Patrick wasn’t Irish? [TRUE. He was born in Wales, then captured and sent to Ireland as a slave.]
• True or false – a shamrock is a weed? [TRUE, from the clover family.]
• Who’s taller – a leprechaun or ‘GI Joe’? [The original ‘GI Joe’ was just under 12 inches, while your average leprechaun is about 24 inches tall, according to Irish folklore.]
• What sound should you listen for in order to catch a leprechaun? [Treasure hunters can often track down a leprechaun by listening for the sound of his shoemaker’s hammer.]
• Is it legal for an Irishman to beat his ‘bodhran’ (bow-rawn) in public? [Sure, it’s the traditional sheepskin drum of Ireland.]
• What does an Irishman call his ‘companion for life’ – his shillelagh (shi-lay-lee), his whiskey jug, or his beloved wee wife? [His shillelagh. Made from blackthorn, they rarely wear out.]
• How do you spell ‘whiskey’? [Whiskey in Ireland is spelled with an ‘e’ before the ‘y’. Scottish Whisky (or Scotch) is spelled without the ‘e.’ The same applies to the US vs Canada.]
– Irish Tourist Board

☎ Aside from beer, what have you consumed on St Patrick’s Day that was green (and usually isn’t)?

Question: Among the largest hotels in the world, 1-in-5 have THIS in common.
Answer: They’re in Las Vegas.

May the wind at your back not be the result of the corned beef & cabbage you had for lunch.

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