Thursday, March 28, 2013           Edition: #4951

100% Grade A Bull!

✳ Actress Angelina Jolie is back in Africa in her role as roving ambassador for the UN. She visited the Democratic Republic of Congo and Rwanda this week “to call on all governments to help eradicate sexual violence in conflicts.” However, for most Brangelina watchers, the big news is she’s been snapped without her massive engagement diamond, having replaced it with a gold band. So again we ask, are they wed or not? (At this point, they’re just toying with us.)
✳ A man accused of breaking into “Breaking Bad” star Bryan Cranston’s car late last year and stealing one of the final scripts for the popular AMC series has been arrested. The 29-year-old made his initial court appearance Monday. None of the stolen items, which also include an iPad and shoulder bag, have been recovered. The series’ final 6 episodes begin airing July 14th. (What kind of idiot would mess with ‘Walter White’? He’s the one who knocks!)
✳ “Smash” star Debra Messing is returning to half-hour comedy with a starring role in an as-yet-untitled CBS-TV pilot (formerly know as “Mother’s Day”). The show centers on 40-year-old ‘Ella’ (Messing) who, in order to successfully navigate through the demanding life of being a mother of 3, a lover, a friend, and a career woman, constantly lies her way out of and into situations. (If nothing else, this is further proof that “Smash” is dead in the water.)
✳ The 3rd season of “Homeland” (Showtime) doesn’t start up until September, but until then we can continue arguing about whether ‘Brody’ and ‘Carrie’ belong together or if they’re doomed. And now ‘Brody’ portrayer Damian Lewis has weighed in on the issue telling “Digital Spy”: “I think it’s over. I don’t think those two can be together. Can you imagine them being married and bringing up kids?” (How come the lead actors on the all good shows these days seem to be Brits faking American accents?)
✳ Still reeling from his breakup with British singer-songwriter Rita Ora, broken-hearted sometime reality TV star Rob Kardashian has reportedly been finding comfort at the bottom of a bottle. Not surprisingly, the Kardashian family is said to be concerned about the 26-year-old’s carousing, which is reportedly spiraling out of control. An inside source says, “Rob is a complete mess. He drinks like a fish … he’s hooking up with paid escorts … and his business is tanking.” (Is it wrong to gloat over a Kardashian going down?)
– “Star Magazine”

• “American Idol” (FOX/CTV) – Contestants face elimination; “AI” alum Colton Dixon performs.
• “Conan” (TBS/CTV) – Imagine Dragons (“Night Visions”). Rerun.
• “Ellen DeGeneres Show” (syndicated/CTV2) – Common (“The Dreamer, The Believer”). Rerun.
• International Mobile Gaming Awards (San Francisco) – The 9th annual salute to games we play on smartphones and tablets. Among this year’s nominees: “Angry Birds Star Wars”; “Bad Piggies”; “Walking Dead: The Game”; and “Zombies, Run!”.
• “Jimmy Kimmel Live” (ABC/CityTV) – Kendrick Lamar (“Good Kid, mAAd City”).
• “Last Call With Carson Daly” (NBC) – Gold Fields (“Black Sun”).
• “Late Night With Jimmy Fallon” (NBC/CTV2) – Blake Shelton (“Based On a True Story …”).
• “Live With Kelly & Michael” (syndicated/CTV) – Blake Shelton again.
• “Tonight Show With Jay Leno” (NBC/CTV2) – Imagine Dragons again.

• Chris Brown – His upcoming 6th studio album, due in August, will be titled “X”. He tells MTV News that can have different meanings. Quote: “It can refer to an ex-girlfriend … it’s also about being a reject in a sense.” Huh?
• Green Day – Tonight their arena tour, interrupted by Billie Joe Armstrong’s rehab, reboots in the Chicago suburb of Rosemont IL, and runs through April 18th in Los Angeles. Then the band heads to Europe.
• John Legend – He’s now joined the June 1st “Sound of Change Live” female empowerment event scheduled for Britain’s Twickenham Stadium, south London. Beyoncé, Florence & The Machine, and Timbaland are also on the bill. Legend quote: “All men should be feminists.”
• Justin Bieber – His “Believe” tour resumes tonight in Munich, Germany after he took a brief break at his Calabasas CA home on Tuesday. That’s when a neighbor claims the Biebs threatened him and made physical contact during a showdown over noisy partying. The neighbour’s filed a police battery report over the incident. And you can bet he’ll sue.
• Kanye West – His upcoming 6th album will be reportedly titled “I Am God”. Meantime, word has it he & pregnant girlfriend Kim Kardashian are considering welcoming their first child in Paris, France. Hey ‘ye, why not consider moving there permanently?
• Keyshia Cole – Tonight her 18-city headlining “Woman to Woman” tour, named after her November ‘12 album, begins in Westbury NY. It wraps in Cole’s hometown of Oakland CA on April 21st. The trek’s special guest is Chrisette Michele.
• Phoenix – Tonight they embark on a handful of West Coast shows, starting at the Queen Elizabeth Theatre in Vancouver BC. The series of 6 gigs sets up their appearance at the “Coachella Festival, April 13th/20th. Their new album “Bankrupt!” is due the week of April 22nd.

A BS selection of movies in the making …
✓ “Atlas Shrugged 3” – Despite the financial failure of the first 2 movies, a 3rd installment is in the works, based on the final novel by Ayn Rand, published in 1957. No director or major cast member is yet attached to the new film, which takes place in a dystopian US where government regulation and high taxes have stifled the economy. Sounds like a Tea Party pamphlet.
✓ “Careful What You Wish For” – Dermot Mulroney has joined the cast of this indie thriller that stars singer Nick Jonas as a young man who has an affair with a married woman, played by Isabel Lucas. Mulroney is cast as her husband, an investment banker. His suspicious death reveals – surprise! – a substantial life insurance policy. Filming starts April 22 in Charlotte NC.
✓ “Eden” – Olatunde Osunsanmi (“The Fourth Kind”) is directing this futuristic sci-fi take on the Underground Railroad legend. Rather than humans enslaving other humans, the plot sees aliens oppressing humanity. The story follows a family on the run, risking their lives to get to a free city via something called ‘The Rail’.
✓ “Hansel & Gretel: Witch Hunters 2” – Paramount Pictures has given the greenlight to a sequel to the Jeremy Renner-Gemma Arteron action-fantasy after it grossed more than $200 million worldwide, even though a review in “Rolling Stone”described it as ‘lamebrained’ and ‘vomit-inducing’. It’s not yet known whether Renner and Arterton will sign on for the follow-up.
✓ Untitled Sandler Pic – Adam Sandler is hoping Drew Barrymore will co-star in his next comedy that revolves around a couple who, after a disastrous blind date, are stuck together in a family resort with their children from previous marriages. The twosome previously shared the screen in “50 First Dates” and “The Wedding Singer”. Production is set to start in May.

Think your boss is an idiot? Then there’s a good chance you are one as well. Social psychologists from Spain’s University of Granada have found that bosses who feel insecure or unqualified to hold their position often choose to hire and surround themselves with less competent people. On the other hand, bosses who feel qualified prefer to hire exceedingly competent people who can take on responsibility. (We have an unbelievably savvy leader!)

• “My second-favorite household chore is ironing. My first being hitting my head on the top bunk-bed until I faint.” (Erma Bombeck)
• “Housework can’t kill you, but why take a chance?” (Phyllis Diller)
• “I hate housework. You make the beds, you wash the dishes … and 6 months later you have to start all over again.” (Joan Rivers)
• “I’m not going to vacuum until Sears makes one you can ride on.” (Roseanne Barr)
– “Psychology Today” March 2013

Are you the one always calling the shots in your marriage? A Pennsylvania State University study has found that the spouse who feels less in control is more likely to describe the marriage as unhappy and respond with anger and negative tactics. However, if you make a conscious effort to let your spouse call the shots as often as you do, it’s good for your relationship. (OK, I’ve picked out the new car, now you decide what kind of toilet scrubber we should buy.)
– “Prevention Magazine”

These aren’t the sharpest pooches in the pound, according to one ranking …
5. Pekingese.
4. Basset Hound.
3. Beagle.
2. Rottweiler.
1. Cavalier King Charles Spaniel (aka ‘Duh Spaniel’).

Want to be happy in your work? Find employment at a small company. People who work for small organizations are about 25% more likely to be happy than those toiling in large organizations of 1,000 employees or more, according to new research. Among the other findings: Supervising others (as opposed to being supervised) is also associated with more happiness. (Interesting: Working in a home office qualifies both ways.)
– “Delivering Happiness at Work”

How do you know when it’s time to quit your job? Here are a few signs …
✗ You’re mentally exhausted by the end of the day.
✗ You’re watching the clock … like every 10 minutes.
✗ Your boss is a nightmare.
✗ You get no respect.
✗ Your co-workers act like animals and are really annoying.

It’s sort of a given that women get, shall we say, somewhat emotional at a certain time of the month. Guess what? So-called ‘PMS’ may be a myth. New Zealand researchers have found that just 15% of women report their moods get worse when their cycle is about to start. It’s speculated that the very concept of PMS may have started as a sexist idea about women’s changing moods back when most physicians were male. (And before you could look stuff up on WebMD.)

It takes the average man 97 days of being in a relationship before he uses the ‘L’ word.
– “Journal of Personality & Social Psychology”


1955 [58] Reba McEntire, McAlester OK, country singer (“Turn On the Radio”, “Consider Me Gone”)/TV actress (“Malibu Country” since 2012, “Reba” 2001-07)/movie actress (“Tremors”)

1969 [44] Rodney Atkins, Knoxville TN, country singer (“Take a Back Road”, “These Are My People”)

1970 [43] Vince Vaughn, Minneapolis MN, movie actor (“Wedding Crashers”, “Old School”)

1975 [38] Kate Gosselin, Philadelphia PA, reality TV personality (“Celebrity Wife Swap” 2013, “Kate Plus 8” 2010-11, “Twist of Kate” 2010, “Dancing With the Stars” 2010, “Jon & Kate Plus 8” 2007-09)

1976 [37] Dave Keuning, Pella IA, rock guitarist (The Killers-“When You Were Young”, “Mr Brightside”)

1981 [32] Julia Stiles, NYC, movie actress (“The Bourne Ultimatum”, “Save the Last Dance”)/TV actress (“Dexter” 2010)

1986 [27] Lady Gaga (Stefani Germanotta), NYC, pop singer (“Born This Way”, “Just Dance”)  UP NEXT: The new album “ARTPOP”, due later this year.

• “Hot Tub Day”, time to soak yourself in a steaming hot tub and bust the stress. Yum, human stew!

• “Letting Go of Stuff Day”, a self-help day on the 4th Thursday in March designed to ‘free up subconscious space’.

• “Something On a Stick Day”, celebrating corn dogs, shish kebabs, Popsicles, ice cream bars, and any of the estimated 3 dozen other foods regularly served on a stick.

• “Weed Appreciation Day”, a salute to plants that grow wild which, though classified as weeds, have a beauty all their own. Think of them as wildflowers and see if that helps.

1995 [18] Oddball singer Lyle Lovett and actress Julia Roberts announce they are separating after 21 months of marriage (right after she gets the prescription for her contacts renewed)

1973 [40] Pink Floyd’s “Dark Side Of the Moon” album hits #1 (it remains on the chart for 741 weeks from 1973-88, as an estimated 50 million copies are sold)

1999 [14] Venus Williams beats kid sister Serena to win the Lipton Championship, the 1st all-sister women’s tennis final in 115 years

1983 [30] Fred Jipp is sentenced to 28 years in prison in Phoenix, Arizona for fraud and bigamy after marrying 104 women in 28 countries over a 30-year period

[Fri] “GI Joe: Retaliation”; “The Host”; “Tyler Perry’s Temptation” open in movie theaters
[Fri] Lollapalooza Brasil begins
[Fri] Day of Unplugging
[Fri] Mom & Pop Business Owners Day
[Sun] “Walking Dead” Season 3 finalé (AMC)
This Week Is … Root Canal Awareness Week
This Month Is … Music In Our Schools Month


✗ Cadbury Creme Dust Bunnies
✗ Spoon-Size Plastic Grass
✗ Jelly Beano
✗ Chocolate-Covered Rabbit’s Foot
✗ Dashboard Melts
✗ Refried Jelly Beans
✗ Hard-Boiled Eggos
✗ Frosted Basket Fragments
✗ Marshmallow Creeps
✗ Nestlé Choking Hazard
– Adapted from

☎ Who do you trust? Besides spouse and family, who can you count on most? An “AARP Bulletin” poll of people 18-to-49 is topped by best friend, doctor, religious leader, neighbor, and banker.

He’s so bow-legged, he has to iron his underpants on a boomerang.

Question: More than half of us are doing THIS 3 times a day.
Anser: Snacking.

The problem with the future is it turns into the present.

Monthly Planning Calendar in Tomorrow’s BS!

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