Friday March 6, 2020 – Edition: #6649
Thanks a Sheetload for Choosing “BS”!
BS SHOW BIZ BUZZ:
★ Alex Trebek gave a heart-wrenching one-year status update on his stage four pancreatic cancer diagnosis Wednesday, opening up about the “massive attacks of depression” that made him “wonder if it was really worth fighting on.” In a video posted to Jeopardy’s Twitter account, Trebek says that he joked with friends “that the cancer won’t kill me, the chemo treatments will”. But the beloved television personality reminded viewers why it’s important to keep a positive attitude and not give up hope: his wife Jean, who, he says, “has given her all to help me survive.”
-TheWrap
★ The next James Bond movie “No Time to Die” won’t be released until November. The film was originally supposed to be released internationally on April 2 and in the U.S. on April 10. But the spread of the coronavirus has led to closures of theaters in major markets such as Italy, South Korea, China, and Japan. That could have been a major blow to “No Time to Die,” which cost more than $200 million to produce and millions more to market. Now, the film will be released in the U.K. on November 12, with worldwide release dates to follow, including a North American launch on November 25th.
-Yahoo
★ Ben Affleck was accompanied by a “sober liaison” to and from the set of his new film, “The Way Back”. In the movie, Affleck stars as an ex-basketball player who has to battle his alcoholism and other demons when he’s asked to coach the basketball team at his former college. Affleck has also struggled with a dependence on alcohol for much of his adult life, and began work on the movie while he was in rehab. In order to ensure he didn’t stray from his sober journey, the rehab facility provided him with a sober liaison, according to his co-star Will Ropp.
-Canoe
★ It looks like Pete Davidson’s recent, candid interview made waves over at Studio 8H. During the interview, Davidson said that he might be ready to quit “Saturday Night Live”, and that he’s tired of being the butt of so many jokes. Although he said he’d never ask his castmates to stop cracking jokes about him, he did say: “If I’m just fodder now… maybe I shouldn’t be there.” Now, the tension seems to be getting worse: Davidson reportedly skipped the SNL afterparty this week, where multiple cast members apparently fumed about his interview.
-MSN
TODAY’S SHOW BIZ SKED:
• “The Tonight Show starring Jimmy Fallon” (NBC/CTV): Carrie Underwood, Diego Luna, Lauv
• “The Late Show with Stephen Colbert” (CBS/Global): Neil deGrasse Tyson, Hannah Einbinder
• “Late Night with Seth Meyers” (NBC/CTV): RuPaul, Stacey Abrams, Maria Bamford, drummer Elijah Wood (R)
• “The Late Late Show with James Corden” (CBS/CTV): Kumail Nanjiani, Dan Levy, Celeste (R)
• “The View” (ABC/CTV): Rocco DiSpirito, guest co-host Sara Haines
• “The Talk” (CBS): Max Greenfield, Tarek El Moussa, guest co-hosts Rumer & Tallulah Willis
• “Live with Kelly and Ryan” (ABC/CTV): Whitney Cummings, Billy Gardell
• “The Ellen DeGeneres Show” (NBC/CTV): Justin Bieber, Jhené Aiko, Miguel, Future, guest host Demi Lovato
• “The Kelly Clarkson Show” (CHECK LOCAL LISTINGS): Liv Tyler, Kimora Lee Simmons, Skylar Johnson
• “The Most Dangerous Animal of All” (FX): Series premiere. Adopted as a baby, Gary always fought with his identity and after 39 years, the search for his biological parents shows a truth he could not have imagined.
• “The Trade” (SHOWTIME): Season 2 premiere.
SATURDAY-
• “My Nightmare Landlord” (LIFETIME): Lydia moves into a new apartment after breaking up with her longtime boyfriend, but finds herself increasingly isolated when the manager becomes obsessed with her.
• “Love Goals” (OWN): Series premiere. Renowned family and relationship therapist Spirit counsels celebrity couples who are at crossroads in their relationships.
• “Saturday Night Live” (NBC): Host Daniel Craig, with musical guest The Weeknd.
SUNDAY-
• “Ride With Norman Reedus” (AMC): Season 4 premiere. Reedus explores the historic city of Birmingham, Ala., with his onscreen brother, Michael Rooker, they then arrive in Senoia, Ga., for a “Walking Dead” reunion.
• “Family Karma” (BRAVO): Series premiere. Vishal invites his future mother-in-law to the yearly Diwali Gala, and she spills the chai on how she really feels about his family.
BS MUSIC NOTES:
• Katy Perry – Her ex-husband Russell Brand called her a “lovely human being” while onstage during a comedy show this week. Perry’s fans are speculating that she is set to drop a new single titled ‘Never Worn White’, that references the estranged pair’s nuptials.
• Miley Cyrus – says her upcoming new album “She is Miley Cyrus” is “super close” to being finished and the music is sounding “super rock and roll”. When does it come out? “Not too much longer”.
• Genesis – will tour in 2020 for the first time in 13 years. Phil Collins, Tony Banks and Mike Rutherford have announced a 10-date trek of the United Kingdom and Ireland, dubbed “The Last Domino?”, starting Nov. 16 in Dublin. Although Collins plans to get behind the drums for “some bits” during the tour, his son Nic will handle most of the timekeeping.
• Journey — have fired bassist Ross Valory and drummer Steve Smith, accusing them of launching an “ill-conceived corporate coup” in an effort to take control of the band’s name. The band is scheduled to start a summer tour with the Pretenders in May.
• Metallica — has introduced its own ‘Vinyl Club’. For $50, fan club members can subscribe to be treated to rare cuts, demos and rough mixes, and live rarities — none of which have ever been released on vinyl before. Each subscription includes a series of four seven-inch records shipped throughout the year.
• Kenny Chesney – has announced he has finished recording his nineteenth studio album, “Here And Now”. The forthcoming LP, which Chesney says has a “high fun factor”, is preceded by the title track, and the lead single ‘Tip of My Tongue,’ which was co-written by Ed Sheeran. “Here and Now” is set for a May 1st release.
• Chris Young – is among the first to lead by example following the deadly tornado that ripped through Nashville on Tuesday. He says he’s donating $50,000 to the Music City Inc. Foundation, the charitable arm of the Nashville Convention & Visitors Corp.
• Dolly Parton — is the subject of a new documentary, “The Library That Dolly Built”, focusing on her philanthropic effort, the “Imagination Library”, which she began to encourage reading. The doc will play in theaters for one day only, on April 2.
TODAY’S MOVIE OPENINGS:
• “Onward” (PG, Action/Animation): In a suburban fantasy world, two teenage elf brothers embark on a quest to discover if there is still magic out there. (Tom Holland, Chris Pratt, Julia Louis-Dreyfus)
• “The Way Back” (R-Rated, Drama): Jack Cunningham was a highschool basketball phenom who walked away from the game, forfeiting his future. Years later, when he reluctantly accepts a coaching job at his alma mater, he gets one last shot at redemption. (Ben Affleck, Janina Gavankar)
• “The Burnt Orange Heresy” (R-Rated, Action/Adventure–Limited Release): Hired to steal a rare painting from one of most enigmatic painters of all time, an ambitious art dealer becomes consumed by his own greed and insecurity as the operation spins out of control. (Donald Sutherland, Mick Jagger)
• “First Cow” (PG, Drama–Limited Release): A skilled cook has joined a group of fur trappers in Oregon, though he only finds true connection with a Chinese immigrant also seeking his fortune. Soon the two collaborate on a successful business. (John Magaro, Orion Lee)
NEWS OF THE WEIRD:
➢ A British Columbia grandfather is questioning if it’s appropriate to offer cannabis prizes in raffles after his eight-year-old grandson won a stash of $200 worth of pot products at a local youth hockey tournament. Keith Redl says the boy’s dad bought $10 worth of raffle tickets and let the boy bid on whatever prizes he liked. The prize pack that the 8-year-old eventually won didn’t feature the sweet treats that the boy was expecting. Instead, it contained various chocolate edibles, vanilla chai and other pot products — all stamped with the red, octagonal THC symbol of legal cannabis. There was also a pipe and a lighter. The grandfather says someone should be held responsible for awarding a prize containing drugs to a child. (2 minutes for ‘high’-sticking?)
➢ (***CAUTION***) An Aussie “Puppetry of the Penis” performer severely injured his testicles in a freak corkscrew accident during a performance at the Adelaide Fringe Festival. David Friend, a co-founder of the comedy group that puts on “genital origami shows”, was performing his signature trick “The Bulldog” when he plopped onto a woman’s lap. Unfortunately, he sat directly onto a corkscrew in the woman’s pocket. Witnesses say that Friend’s testicles “turned a deep shade of purple”. He was advised to give his act a week’s rest. (What hurt the most was twisting it back out!)
A BRIEF HISTORY OF DAYLIGHT-SAVING TIME:
At 2 am Sunday, clocks across North America will ‘spring forward’ one hour. Why do we do this?
✓ The idea of ‘Daylight Saving Time’ was first proposed in 1895 by New Zealand entomologist George Vernon Hudson, and although people were interested, it never caught on.
✓ In 1905, William Willett came up with the same idea in London. Why? He was an avid golfer who hated cutting short his Summer rounds on the links. Again, the idea failed to catch on.
✓ The Germans and their allies were the first to implement Daylight Saving Time as a way of conserving coal during WW1. Britain and many other European countries followed the example.
✓ The US adopted DST in 1918, but it wasn’t until 1966 that the whole country observed it. All Canadian provinces were on DST by the 1970s, except the majority of Saskatchewan, which stays on Central Standard Time year-round.
– CBC.ca
DID YOU KNOW?
Living on a street with colorful houses can boost your property value by 20%. A UK study by HomeOwners Alliance and Brewers Paint found that the “value of a property can be thousands of pounds more on a street where all homes are painted brightly”. But keep in mind, while we can’t persuade all of our neighbors to redecorate their exterior walls in pink, green and orange to boost our street’s value, it is worth bearing in mind that not only will you pay a premium to live on a vibrant street, there could be big savings to be had just metres away, in a more conservatively-colored area.
(I’m pretty sure that some of the very (ahem!) colorful PEOPLE in my neighborhood aren’t doing much for property values!)
-HouseBeautiful
BS CHRONOMETER 03.06.20
TODAY’S CELEBIRTHDAYS . . .
1946 [74] David Gilmour, Cambridge England, guitarist/vocalist (Ex-Pink Floyd-‘Another Brick in the Wall Pt.2’, ‘Comfortably Numb’)
1947 [73] Kiki Dee, Yorkshire England, pop singer (w/Elton John: ‘Don’t Go Breaking My Heart’, ‘I’ve Got the Music in Me’)
1947 [73] Rob Reiner, The Bronx NY, movie producer-director (“The Wolf of Wall Street”, “This Is Spinal Tap”), TV actor (Michael ‘Meathead’ Stivic on “All in the Family” 1971-79)
1959 [61] Tom Arnold, Ottumwa IA, movie actor (“True Lies”)/TV actor (“Rosanne” 1989-1993)
1967 [53] Connie Britton, Boston MA, TV actress-producer (‘Rayna Jaymes’ on “Nashville” 2012-2017)
1972 [48] Shaquille O’Neal, Newark NJ, retired basketball player (15-time All-Star, 4-time NBA Champion, NBA MVP 2000)/sports analyst/rapper/actor/podcast host/sheriff’s deputy in Jonesboro, Georgia
1991 [29] Tyler, the Creator (Tyler Gregory Okonma), LA CA, rapper (‘Yonkers’)/producer (Mac Miller-‘Watching Movies With the Sound Off’, Frank Ocean-‘Channel Orange’)
SATURDAY- Bryan Cranston (“Breaking Bad”) is 64; Wanda Sykes (“Curb Your Enthusiasm”) is 56; Rachel Weisz (“The Bourne Legacy”) is 50; Jay Duplass (“The Mindy Project”) is 47; Tobias Menzies (“Game of Thrones”) is 56; Jenna Fischer (“The Office”) is 46; Laura Prepon (“Orange Is the New Black”) is 40
SUNDAY- Micky Dolenz (The Monkees-‘I’m a Believer’) 75; Lester Holt (“Dateline NBC”) is 61; Camryn Manheim (“The Practice”) is 59; Freddie Prinze Jr. (“She’s All That”) is 44; James Van Der Beek (“Dawson’s Creek”) is 43; Kat Von D (“LA Ink”) is 38
TODAY’S BS REASONS TO PARTY . . .
• “Dentist’s Day”, honoring the professionals who help us maintain a big, toothy smile … for a big fee. The business of dentistry is consistently ranked among those with the highest profit margins. We think it has something to do with a secret kick-back deal with the Tooth Fairy. (You know the drill…)
• “Day of Unplugging”, a day to pledge you’ll spend time with real people and detach yourself from all electronic gadgets. The ‘day’ runs from sundown tonight to sundown tomorrow. NET: http://nationaldayofunplugging.com/about-us/
• “Dress in Blue Day”, to raise awareness about colon cancer, to celebrate survivors, and to help patients in need during “Colorectal Cancer Awareness Month”.
• “Employee Appreciation Day”, observed annually on the first Friday in March. It’s much cheaper than handing out raises.
• “Frozen Food Day”, commemorating the first ‘Individually Packaged Frozen Foods’, created by Clarence Birdseye in Springfield, Massachusetts 90 years ago (1930). He got the idea after seeing Canadians thawing and eating naturally frozen fish.
• “Oreo Cookie Day”, honoring the taste treat many of us deconstruct before eating. The first Oreos went on sale on this date in 1912. More than 500 billion have been sold since. Some think the name comes from a combination of taking the ‘re’ from ‘creme’ and placing it between the two ‘o’s in ‘chocolate’, – making ‘o-re-o’.
• “Day Of the Dude”, promoting the philosophy & lifestyle inspired by fictional character ‘Jeffrey “The Dude” Lebowski’, as portrayed by Jeff Bridges in the 1998 film “The Big Lebowski”. Many consider ‘Dudeism’, a modern form of Chinese Taoism, as a mock religion.
NET: http://dudeism.com
SATURDAY-
• “Be Heard Day”, a time for entrepreneurs, small business owners, and solo professionals to find their voice, tell their story, and be heard (If you want to be seen, stand up. If you want to be heard, speak up…and if you want to be appreciated, shut up!)
• “Cereal Day”, a day to share in the delights of crunchy n’ crispy breakfast cereals. Celebrated on the anniversary of the world’s first corn flakes being served to Dr John Kellogg’s sanitarium patients in Battle Creek, Michigan in 1897. (***See ‘BS RANDOM JOKE’, below***)
NET: http://www.lavasurfer.com/cereal-guide.html
• “Middle Name Pride Day”, today’s name celebration requires honesty and possibly some courage. Tell your middle name to three people who don’t already know it (Who you can trust…)
FAMOUS PEOPLE’S WEIRD MIDDLE NAMES:
➢ Richard Tiffany Gere
➢ Daniel Wroughten Craig
➢ Drew Allison Carey
➢ Quincy Delight Jones
➢ Kiefer William Frederick Dempsey George Rufus Sutherland
SUNDAY-
• “Daylight Saving Time” in North America begins at 2 am. The annual ‘Spring Forward’ is now programmed right into computers, phones, and other electronic devices. The semi-annual clock reset is also touted as a good excuse for “Check Your Batteries Day”, when you test and/or replace smoke alarm batteries. (And remember, it’s ‘Daylight Saving Time’, not ‘Savings’!)
• “International Women’s Day”, first suggested at a 1910 women’s conference in Copenhagen by activist Clara Zetkin. The first “IWD” was observed in Germany the next year. This year’s theme is #EachForEqual NET: http://www.internationalwomensday.com
• “Proofreading Day”, to promote accuracy in written messages. If you hate typos and grammatical errors, thIs iZ yer dayb
THIS DAY IN SHOW BIZ . . .
2016 [04] Former movie actress and 42nd US First Lady Nancy Reagan dies in Bel Air CA aged 94
TODAY’S MUSIC EVENTS . . .
2000 [20] With his induction into the Rock & Roll Hall of Fame as a solo artist, Eric Clapton becomes the first (and still the only) to be so-honored 3 times (also as a member of Cream and The Yardbirds)
2013 [07] Singer-songwriter and Canadian icon Stompin’ Tom Connors dies at age 77 (his oddball songs include ‘Bud the Spud’, ‘The Hockey Song’, and ‘Big Joe Mufferaw’)
2016 [04] Diplo and his electronic dancehall project “Major Lazer” become the first US musical act to perform in Havana, Cuba in the new era of diplomatic relations
TODAY’S FIRSTS . . .
1945 [75] George Nissen of Cedar Rapids, Iowa, receives a patent for the first modern trampoline (which at the very least, inspired the best ‘Yo Mama’ joke ever. Google it!)
2014 [06] Britain’s Prince Harry initiates the ‘Invictus Games’, a sporting competition for wounded members of the military
BULL’S BITS
BS WHACK FACTS:
✓ An average person will forget 80% of what they learned today.
✓ Russian bricklayers have been known to mix vodka into their mortar to keep it from freezing.
✓ Roses cut in the afternoon will last longer than ones cut in the morning.
✓ More people are allergic to cow’s milk than any other food or drink.
✓ Technically speaking, brides don’t walk down the aisle – they walk down the ‘nave’.
✓ Soybeans produce more flatulence than any other bean.
-BathroomReadersInstitute
GRAMMATICALLY CORRECT A SONG:
• I Am Unable to Attain Any Satisfaction
• Baby Has a Back
• Whip It, Whip It Well
• Your Momma Doesn’t Dance, And Your Daddy Neither Rocks nor Rolls
• We Obviously Do Need An Education
• Mothers, Do Not Let Your Infants Mature Into Professional Cattle Ranchers.
• There Are No Mountains High Enough
• Hips Do Not Spread Falsehoods
• There is Excessive Shaking Occurring at This Moment
• Whom Are You Going to Place a Call to – Ghostbusters!
-Twitter
Best of BS . . .
BS DIFFICULT-TO-STRIP-TO SONGS:
• Cat’s in the Cradle – Harry Chapin
• The Fishin’ Hole (Andy Griffith Show Theme) – Earle Hagen
• Tie a Yellow Ribbon Round the Old Oak Tree – Dawn ft. Tony Orlando
• The Gambler – Kenny Rogers
• The Lion Sleeps Tonight – The Tokens
• Tears in Heaven – Eric Clapton
• It’s a Small World (After All) – The Sherman Brothers
• Send in the Clowns – Judy Collins
• This Land is Your Land – Woody Guthrie
• Born Free – Andy Williams
• Old Man – Neil Young
• Everything is Beautiful – Ray Stevens
• The Imperial March (Darth Vader’s Theme) – John Williams
-First published in BS in 2019
BS WEB GOODIE:
The new work handshake: https://tinyurl.com/vc8ptz3
BS RANDOM JOKE:
If you wait long enough to make dinner, everyone will just eat cereal. It’s science.
BS PHONE STARTER:
What is the ‘laziest’ thing that you find yourself doing regularly?
BS WATER COOLER QUESTION:
Question: A study found thinking of THIS makes most people happy. What is it?
Answer: Ice cream
DEEP THOUGHT:
Pay attention to who you’re with when you feel your best.
