Tuesday, May 15, 2007        Edition: #3531
When You Can’t Dazzle Them With Brilliance, Baffle Them With Bull!

BS SHOW BIZ BUZZ:
TODAY “Girls Gone Wild” pimpresario Joe Francis is scheduled to be released from jail in Panama City FL after completing his 35-day sentence for contempt of court, but the bad news (for him at least) is – marshals will be waiting to arrest him the moment he’s out on tax evasion & several other felony charges (we’re never gonna hear from this guy again) . . . TODAY the lawsuit brought against ABC-TV by the 5 Higgins family orphans featured in an episode of “Extreme Makeover: Home Edition” is scheduled to go to trial; a complicated & convoluted suit which claims the kids were victims of a ‘racist, orchestrated campaign to degrade and insult them’ (what really happened is the orphans walked out on their adoptive parents and were left with nothing) . . . MTV is stealing the concept behind “Dancing With the Stars” (ABC) to develop a new series called “Rapping With the Stars”, a reality competition that will pair celebrities with hip-hop pros (do you have to share their jail time?) . . .  22-year-old “Pirates of the Caribbean” actress Keira Knightley claims she never thought of herself as a celebrity until she recently spotted toy figurines of her ‘Elizabeth Swann’ character for sale, and she’d ‘give up acting in a second’ to get out of the spotlight (yeah right, and you haven’t because?) . . . Actress Katie Holmes’ now-shooting new film seems appropriately titled “Mad Money” because she regularly blows big bucks treating the cast & crew to pizza, ice-cream, and cupcakes (not to mention Scientology pamphlets) . . . Reggae legend Bob Marley’s landmark 1977 album “Exodus” will be the first artist-specific album to be made available in memory stick format, a 30th anniversary limited edition to be released on a red, gold & green USB flashdrive or micro SD memory card, which can be used with cellphones, portable audio players & PCs (soon we’ll be able to download directly into the brain) . . . The Motion Picture Association of America has announced it will now issue parental warnings on movies that ‘glamorize cigarette smoking’ or that feature ‘pervasive smoking outside of a historic or other mitigating context’ (ie: a post-sex bedroom scene) . . . Bollywood actress Shilpa Shetty is trying to get the court case against her & Richard Gere over their public smooch moved to a different court in India so she can answer charges directly (it may just wither away as official charges in the ‘obscenity’ case have yet to be filed) . . . And we saw this one coming – former “Dukes of Hazzard” actor John Schneider is now considering legal action against a California man who has reneged on his astronomical eBay bid of $9.9 million to purchase a 1969 Dodge Charger replica of the ‘General Lee’ used on the show (man, you should have got suspicious when bidding went over 10-grand for that old beater).

BS MUSIC NOTES:
• Bee Gees – TONIGHT they receive the ‘Icon Award’ at BMI’s 55th annual “Pop Awards” at the Regent Beverly Wilshire Hotel in Los Angeles.
• Feist – TONIGHT she embarks on a 10-date Canadian tour in Victoria BC, in support of her new album “The Reminder”. TONIGHT she also appears (pre-recorded ) on “Jimmy Kimmel Live” (ABC).
• Genesis – TODAY “Genesis: 1976-1982” is released, the 1st in a series of 3 box sets spotlighting the 13 studio albums by the alma mater band of Phil Collins and Peter Gabriel. The group, minus Gabriel, begins a reunion tour THIS FALL in Toronto.
• Gym Class Heroes – TONIGHT they perform “Shoot Down the Stars” on the “Tonight Show With Jay Leno” (NBC/A Channel).
• Joss Stone – She’s teamed up with Bono’s product ‘RED’ initiative to offer her new video featuring Common, “Tell Me What We’re Gonna Do Now”, on iTunes with all her proceeds going to the Global Fund. TODAY she performs on the “Ellen DeGeneres Show” (syndicated/CityTV).
• Pete Doherty – TODAY a collection of artwork he painted using his own blood goes on sale at London’s Bankrobber gallery (how fitting). It’s estimated Kate Moss’ junkie lover could make as much as much as $1 million from his “Bloodworks” exhibition of 14 paintings and several prints.
• R Kelly – TODAY he releases the single “Rise Up”, about healing in the aftermath of the Virginia Tech shootings. Proceeds benefit the Hokie Spirit Memorial Fund.
• Wilco – TONIGHT they’re the musical guest on “Late Show With David Letterman” (CBS).

TODAY’S VIDEO RELEASES:
• “The Fountain” ( Sci-Fi Fantasy ): Hugh Jackman portrays a 16th-century conquistador who discovers the ‘Tree of Life’ and spends the next 1,000 years searching for a way to save his love (Rachel Weisz). Along the way he develops an understanding of the mysteries that have plagued him for centuries. Partially shot in Montréal.
• “Pan’s Labyrinth” ( Fantasy Thriller ): Mexican writer/director Guillermo del Toro’s Oscar-winning story of the bookish young stepdaughter of a sadistic army officer who escapes into a captivating fantasy world in fascist 1944 Spain. No-name cast. Also available in a 2-disc ‘Platinum Series’.
• “Stomp the Yard” ( Musical Drama ): When a former LA juvie enrolls in an Atlanta university, 2 fraternities battle to sign him up because they believe his street-dance moves could help them win the national step-show competition. Stars Columbus Short, Meagan Good, and chart-topping recording artists Ne-Yo & Chris Brown.
• Also released TODAY: “The Denzel Washington Spotlight Collection”; “Frasier: The 9th Season”; “Michael J Fox Comedy Favorites Collection”; and “Wings: The 4th Season”.

ACADEMY OF COUNTRY MUSIC AWARDS:
TONIGHT Reba McEntire returns to host the 42nd annual awards for the best in country music as they’re handed out in Las Vegas at the MGM Grand Garden Arena (CBS). A few highlights …
• George Strait leads nominees by racking up 8 nods, including ‘Entertainer of the Year’ and ‘Best Male Vocalist’. Brooks & Dunn have7; Rascal Flatts 6.
• Performances include Big & Rich w/John Legend, Brooks & Dunn, Faith Hill, George Strait, Kenny Chesney, Martina McBride, Reba McEntire w/Kelly Clarkson, Sugarland, and Toby Keith.
• Brooks & Dunn receive the annual ’Humanitarian Award’.
NET: http://www.acmcountry.com/content/index.php

ONE BIG FOOTPRINT FOR MANKIND:
An Edmonton MP Mike Lake has presented parliament with a 5,000-signature-strong petition asking the government to include protection for the ‘Sasquatch’ under Canada’s ‘Species at Risk Act’. The  researcher who initiated the petition, Todd Standing, claims he has proof of the mythical beast’s existence but doesn’t want to expose the creature’s whereabouts until it is a protected animal. If and when that happens (when Yetis fly), he promises to make his findings public and take the legend out of the realm of mythology. (Someone is gonna end up with their Bigfoot in their mouth.)
– AFP

BUSY ANTS? HAH!
In her book “1,000 Common Delusions”, author Christa Poppelmann notes that ants have the reputation of being the hardest-working insect but in fact they only work about 20% of the time. They have no reason to be incessantly busy. First, their food (insect larvae, honey, fruit, and carrion) is very nutritious, so they do not have to arrange for large quantities to be collected. Second, within an ants’ nest there is a division of labor. Because hundreds of thousands – even millions – can live in a single nest, it looks like a busy, teeming mass even if only 1 in 5 are hard at it. (This goes a long way to explaining our station’s sales department.)
– “Globe & Mail”

DADDY MAD ME FAT:
Obese kids are more likely to have their father to blame for their weight problem than their mother. Research at the Royal Children’s Hospital in Melbourne, Australia suggests that fathers who are disengaged or do not set clear limits for their kids are more likely to have heavier children. Dads who do lay down boundaries generally have children with a lower Body Mass Index, according to a study of some 5,000 youngsters. Surprisingly, a mother’s parenting style apparently seems to have no impact on whether a child is overweight or obese. (Her peanut butter cookie recipe, however, does.)
– AAP

DOWNLOADING NERDS:
An escort agency in the Netherlands has set up a service specifically for nerds who work in Holland’s I-T sector. Owner Zeo Vialet offers 3-hour sessions with 1 of 5 ‘professional’ women who’ve been specially trained to meet the needs of inexperienced men. She says the typical “40-Year-Old Virgin” is sweet but afraid of contact with other people. She claims her agency provides a valuable public service because a guy needs ‘practice’ before having a girlfriend. (And sometimes a refresher course.)
– Ananova News

OLD GAMBLERS NEVER DIE, THEY JUST GET LOWER ODDS:
A British man who bet $200 a decade ago that we would live to be 100-years-old has now collected a sweet birthday gift of $50,000. Newly-arrived centenarian Alec Holden was given 250-to-1 odds against living to the ripe old age of 100 by bookmaking company William Hill back in 1997. But he may be the last to claim such a prize. With life expectancy on the increase, the new target age for betting has been raised to 110. (And they’re hoping you’ll forget about it.)
– “The Guardian”

BS AMAZING FACT:
Preschoolers will watch a DVD or video an average of 17 times before getting bored.
– “Toronto Star”

AND WE QUOTE:
“I must say that my heart goes out to the inmates of the Century Regional Detention Center. 45 days with Paris Hilton and the attendant publicity seems like cruel and unusual punishment to me. Perhaps THEY should be petitioning the governor for relief?”
– Patty Hearst, who served prison time in the mid-’70s after she was abducted by the Symbionese Liberation Army, denying reports that she’s been offering advice to Paris Hilton about doing hard time.

BS CHRONOMETER 05.15.07

TODAY’S CELEBIRTHDAYS . . .
1952 [55] Chazz Palminteri, NYC, movie actor (“Analyze This”, “The Ususal Suspects”)

1969 [38] Emmitt Smith, Pensacola FL, TV sports analyst (“Monday Night Football Countdown”)/retired NFL running back (Arizona Cardinals 2003-04, Dallas Cowboys 1990-2002)/NFL Career Rushing record (18,355 yds)/”Dancing With the Stars” winner (2006)

1978 [29] David Krumholtz, NYC, TV actor (‘Charlie Eppes’ on “Numb3rs” since 2005)

1981 [26] Jamie-Lynn Sigler, Queens NY, TV actress (‘Meadow Soprano’ on “The Sopranos” 1999-2007)

TODAY’S BS REASONS TO PARTY . . .
• “Chocolate Chip Day”. Hey, any excuse to mow down on a dozen warm gooey cookies fresh out of the oven is cool. Mmm, can’t you just smell ‘em?

• “Flip Your Mattress Day”, an annual turnover to help prevent a case of the ‘lumpies’.

• “International Day of Families”, the 10th annual observance declared by the UN.
NET: http://www.un.org/esa/socdev/family/IntObs/IDF/IDFframe.htm

• “Peace Officer Memorial Day” observed by more than 21,000 police departments across North America to honor colleagues who’ve been killed in the line of duty. An annual observance during “Police Week”.

• “San Isidro Day”, honoring the parton saint of farmers and other agricultural workers.

• “True Confessions Day”, a day to confess all those little secrets you’ve been keeping for years. Open the phone lines for some true confessions. You’ll be surprised what you get!

THIS DAY IN SHOW BIZ . . .
2003 [04] A rerun of “Late Night With Conan O’Brien” airs, re-created entirely in claymation

TODAY’S FIRSTS . . .
1993 [14] 1st Montréal Expo uniform retired (Rusty Staub’s #10, now hanging in the Washington Nationals’ stadium in DC)

1994 [13] Toronto NBA franchise unveils ‘Raptors’ nickname, picked by Canada-wide poll (interestingly, official jerseys arrive in stores the same day)

1995 [12] 1st Canadian magazine to go online (“Maclean’s”)

1930 [77] 1st ‘Flight Attendant’ as Ellen Church serves up snacks and drinks on a United Airlines flight from San Francisco to Cheyenne WY  FACTOID: She was actually qualified as a pilot but because she was female, the company would only employ her for ‘nurse’ duties like serving box lunches and brushing dead flies from windowsills.

1940 [67] DuPont announces “Nylon Day” when ‘nylons’ replace silk stockings as part of WW2 effort (many women resort to ‘liquid stockings’ – rubbing on temporary dye from a bottle, then drawing on a ‘seam’ with eyebrow pencil)

1995 [12] 1st casino gambling site is launched on the Internet (now there’s a bazillion of them!)

TODAY’S RECORD . . .
2000 [07] Vancouver Symphony Orchestra music director Bramwell Tovey eclipses Guinness record for ‘World’s Largest Orchestra’ by conducting the VSO and 10,000 students at GM Place

AND REMEMBER . . .
[Wed] Biographers Day
[Wed] Employee Health & Fitness Day
[Wed] Wear Purple For Peace Day
[Wed] “On the Lot” debuts (FOX)
[Wed] 2007 Cannes Film Festival begins
[Thurs] Pack Rat Day
[Fri] Bike to Work Day
[Fri] “Shrek the Third” opens in movie theaters
This Week Is … Work At Home Moms Week
This Month Is … Revise Your Work Schedule Month

BULL’S BITS

BS CASTING COMPROMISES:
• Mick Jagger wanted to play ‘Dr Frank N Furter’ in “The Rocky Horror Picture Show” (1975) but Tim Curry ended up with the role.
• Italian director Franco Zeffirelli originally wanted Paul McCartney for the romantic lead in his 1968 bigscreen version of Shakespeare’s classic “Romeo & Juliet”. McCartney turned him down because he (correctly) didn’t think he was a good enough actor and besides, The Beatles were recording their classic album “Sgt Pepper’s Lonely Hearts Club Band” at the time of filming.
• According to his ex-wife, late rapper Tupac Shakur auditioned for the role of ‘Bubba’ in “Forrest Gump” (1994). The part eventually went to Mykelti Williamson.
• Sean Connery turned down the role of ‘Gandalf’  in “The Lord of the Rings” trilogy (2001-03), saying he didn’t understand it and therefore didn’t want to spend 18 months on the project. Ian McKellen is glad Connery was so reluctant.
• The green fairy  in “Moulin Rouge” (2001) was originally going to be a long-haired muscle-man played by Ozzy Osbourne. The character was changed (and given to Kylie Minogue) but Ozzy reportedly still recorded the fairy’s scream as it turns evil.
• Late great comedienne Lucille Ball was one of many actresses considered for the part of ‘Scarlett’ in “Gone with the Wind” (1939). Thank goodness it went to Vivien Leigh instead.
• Tom Selleck was originally pursued by Steven Spielberg to play ‘Indiana Jones’ in “Raiders of the Lost Ark” (1981), but it conflicted with his agreement to star in “Magnum PI” on TV.
• Brad Pitt was intended for the supporting role of ‘Tommy Williams’ in 1994′s “The Shawshank Redemption”. It instead went to Vancouver actor Gil Bellows.
• Will Smith turned down the lead role in “The Matrix” (1999), admitting later that he had no regrets because Keanu Reeves was brilliant as ‘Neo’.
• Former “Saturday Night Live” star Chris Farley was originally cast as “Shrek” (2001) and even recorded the dialogue before he died. You can bet Mike Myers is happy Chris liked cocaine.
• After consideration, OJ Simpson was passed over for the title role in “The Terminator” (1984) because, at the time, it was feared he wouldn’t be taken seriously as a killer.
– NotStarring.com

BS PHONE STARTER:
Cellphone use by drivers is banned in many places to ensure better concentration behind the wheel. Should smoking and driving also be banned for the same reason? (The British government is currently being lobbied for just such a law.)

BS RANDOM JOKES:
• I wouldn’t mind being poor if I had lots of money …
• If a guy is alone deep in the forest and makes a sound with no woman there to correct him … is he still wrong?

BS WATER COOLER QUESTION:
Today’s Question: More men than women think THIS constitutes cheating.
Answer to Give Out Next Show: Talking to an ex- on a regular basis.

BS DEEP THOUGHT:
Altruism is when our selfishness benefits someone else.

HOW TO CHANGE SETTINGS FOR MORE RELIABLE E-MAIL:
NET: http://radiobullsheet.blogspot.com/


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