Thursday, May 26, 2022 — Edition: #7238

More From the Sheethouse!

BS SHOW BIZ BUZZ:
★ Getting COVID was an especially scary experience for Jeff Bridges. In a new interview, the 72-year-old told People that he “was pretty close to dying” after contracting COVID while undergoing chemotherapy for non-Hodgkin lymphoma in early 2021. The actor explained that he “had no defences. That’s what chemo does — it strips you of all your immune system”. Bridges said he was in hospital for nearly 5 months, in extreme pain and unable to even roll over without a nurse to help him with his oxygen supply. Quote: “The doctors kept telling me, ‘Jeff, you’ve got to fight.” He says he was “in surrender mode”, but began to improve after receiving convalescent plasma treatment, in which blood is used from people who have previously recovered from an illness.
-People
★ Pass the tissues, Oprah! After 19 seasons, “The Ellen DeGeneres Show” comes to a close today. Oprah Winfrey stopped by on Tuesday to be one of Ellen’s final guests. Saying goodbye to a talk show was all-too familiar for Oprah, whose long-running series ended after 25 seasons in 2011. During her visit, Oprah said: “I got a little emotional backstage because I saw your entire staff is back there and I said to everybody, ‘I know what this feels like”. After Oprah told Ellen how much she’ll be missed, she responded, “That means that I made an impact and I know that that’s all we’re called to do is to have meaning in our life.” Ellen continued, telling Oprah: “I’ve learned that from you and that’s what you did for me.”
-E!
★ Bruce Willis is dunking on. The “Die Hard” star, whose family announced his aphasia diagnosis earlier this year, appeared to be in high spirits Monday as he played a game of backyard basketball with friends. Willis’ wife, Emma Heming, captioned the video “I see you BeeDub,” which showed him shooting the ball through the hoop. The 67-year-old actor, wore a dark gray sweater, khaki trousers, gray sneakers and a blue baseball cap in the clip, which came a few days after Heming admitted to struggling with her husband’s health news. LINK: https://tinyurl.com/3wre39d2
-PageSix
★ Netflix is teasing “Stranger Things” events around the world ahead of season four’s release tomorrow. This week, the official Stranger Things social media accounts released a thread of coordinates related to locations in New York, London, Tokyo, Sydney, Milan, Cologne, Krakow, Barranquilla, Kuala Lumpur and Al-’Ula. The post reads: “Something big is coming. Find your city, and that’s where we’ll be. Over and out.” While it’s unclear what they’re actually teasing, the events in London and New York will take place today. A specific time has not yet been revealed. LINK: https://tinyurl.com/mprfuaw7
-NME

TODAY’S SHOW BIZ SKED:
• “Jimmy Kimmel Live” (ABC/Global): Rose Byrne, Sebastián Yatra
• “The Tonight Show starring Jimmy Fallon” (NBC/CTV): Machine Gun Kelly, Harry Kane, Lainey Wilson
• “The Late Show with Stephen Colbert” (CBS/Global): Beto O’Rourke, Karl Urban
• “Late Night with Seth Meyers” (NBC/CTV): Jon Hamm, Julio Torres, a performance from the musical “Six”, Ulf Mickael Wahlgren
• “The Late Late Show with James Corden” (CBS/CTV): Terry Crews, June Diane Raphael, Amos Lee
• “The View” (ABC/CTV): Julianne Hough, Vanessa Williams, guest co-host Alyssa Farah Griffin
• “The Talk” (CBS): Glen Powell
• “Live with Kelly and Ryan” (ABC/CTV): Jon Hamm, “American Idol” runner-up HunterGirl
• “The Ellen DeGeneres Show” (NBC/CTV): Jennifer Aniston, P!nk, Billie Eilish
• “The Kelly Clarkson Show” (Check local listings): Camila Cabello, Shemar Moore, Craig Morgan
• “The Drew Barrymore Show” (Check local listings): Billie Eilish, Missy Elliott, Big Boy (R)
• “The Wendy Williams Show” (Check local listings): Mare Winningham, Jeannette Bayardelle, guest host Sherri Shepherd
• “Grey’s Anatomy” (ABC): Season 18 finale. Due to a blood shortage, Grey Sloan Memorial sets up a voluntary donation center; Meredith makes a risky decision regarding a patient.
• “Master Chef” (Fox): Season 5 premiere. The top 6 junior chefs put their skills to the test during a restaurant takeover at the luxury hotel NoMad Los Angeles.
• “George Carlin’s American Dream” (HBO): Part 1. In the 1960s, young George cuts his teeth in comedy but stifles his rebellious instincts for mainstream success; in the counterculture 1970s, he reinvents himself, delighting audiences with new material.

BS MUSIC NOTES:
• Harry Styles — On the latest episode of CBeebies children’s series “Bedtime Stories,” he gets cozy in his pajamas to read Jess Hitchman’s “In Every House, On Every Street”, before turning in. Fans rushed to Twitter to share their positive reactions, with one writing: “My kids are so lucky that they’ll grow up with Harry Styles reading bedtime stories to them.” LINK: https://youtu.be/cW0JfldlolI
• Travis Scott — is being sued for allegedly causing a stampede during his appearance at Rolling Loud in Miami in 2019. A woman claims he was told by police to end his show shortly after it began “due to the crowd becoming dangerous and uncontrollable,” but continued to egg on the crowd, despite the fact that he could clearly see concertgoers being injured, suffocating…fighting and being trampled.”
• Aerosmith — has canceled its June and July Las Vegas residency dates while Steven Tyler concentrates on “his health and recovery.” In a statement, the band says: “he has recently relapsed and voluntarily entered a treatment program.” Aerosmith intends to continue its 2022 dates beginning in September.
• Bruce Springsteen – has announced a 2023 tour with The E Street Band, their first since 2017. European dates begin April 28, 2023 in Barcelona, and conclude July 25 in Italy. Multiple reports say that a US leg will happen in Feb., prior to the overseas performances, with a second US leg in August.
• Stevie Nicks, Eminem and Jack White – will all appear on the soundtrack for “Elvis”. The Elvis Presley biopic, directed by Baz Luhrmann and starring Austin Butler, drops next month. Other artists with songs on the soundtrack include Kacey Musgraves, Cee Lo Green (duetting with Eminem), Diplo and Swae Lee, Chris Isaak, Maneskin, and leading man Butler, plus original recordings by Presley himself.
• Luke Bryan – thinks he knows why Noah Thompson won “American Idol”. The Idol judge said: “Those types [of] people, really — America pulls for them, responds to them. And it always tells me that, at the end of the day, being a good, humble, kind person wins.”
• Maren Morris – has her sights set on Broadway. She shared a video of her audition for the role of ‘Elphaba Thropp’ in the long-running musical “Wicked”, writing: “Test shot for my self tape audition. The THEATRE dah-ling IS JUMPING OUT.” The clip is of Morris singing ‘The Wizard and I’. LINK: https://tinyurl.com/3urhues9
• Wynonna Judd — has shared her first new music since the death of her mother and collaborator, Naomi Judd. She teamed up with indie folk artist Waxahatchee for the moving new song ‘Other Side’. The pair co-wrote the inspirational tune with Judd’s husband and fellow musical talent Cactus Moser. LINK: https://youtu.be/NiUhy5Sy81k

SHOOTING THE BULL

SPEED BUMP:
New technology that automatically slows your car down could someday make speed limit signs redundant, and automaker Ford says it could also make streets “simpler, safer and easier on the eye”, AND help drivers avoid costly speeding fines. “Geofencing” technology creates a virtual area where vehicles slow down. The driver receives the information on the dashboard display, with the new speed limit flashing below the current speed. The vehicle then automatically reduces speed; however the driver is able to override the system at any time. Ford is now conducting trials on the geofencing technology, which it says could also be used to set speed limits “dynamically”, to take into account factors such as local hazards, temporary road works and the time of day.
(If you support this idea, it’s basically a way of telling me you have teen drivers without telling me you have teen drivers!)
(We already HAVE tech that automatically slows down my car. It’s called “soaring gas prices”!)
(Why not? In 5 years, it’s not like all our cars won’t be driving themselves, anyway!)
-UniLad

IT’S A BIRD – IT’S A PLANE – IT’S SUPERSONIC:
Eat your heart out, Maverick, and get set for the world’s fastest passenger jet. The race to resume supersonic passenger flights nearly 2 decades after the Concorde resumed this week when plane manufacturer Bombardier announced the launch date of “the world’s fastest and longest-range purpose-built business jet”. The Canadian company said the in-development Global 8000 has a capacity of 19 passengers, a range of 8,000 miles (14,800 kilometers) and a top speed of (wait for it…) Mach 0.94, which is very close to the speed of sound (and is over 66,000 mph, and more than 112,000kph). The plane is expected to enter service in 2025. And if you think THAT’S fast, Colorado’s Boom Supersonic has been testing a prototype aircraft that seats 88 people and can travel at Mach-2.2. That’s more than TWICE the speed of sound.
(That’s so fast, you’ll need to pack after you arrive!)
(Which company do you think Elon Musk will buy first?)
-CNN

INSECT PET:
It’s the latest must-have pet . . . and it’s definitely NOT one you’re going to be able to guess: The praying mantis. Researchers in Italy have noted that the pet mantis (including the praying mantis and other stick insects) market is growing drastically. Study authors say they are being bought and sold at fairs and pet markets, then “raised” by either professionals or amateur owners. These interesting insects come in a variety of shapes and sizes, some downright elegant and beautifully colorful, like the Orchid Mantis. Others look sort of like a Pokémon (the Jeweled Flower Mantis). Many, such as the Giant Shield Mantis, are totally safe to handle and pretty darn cute. The “typical mantis breeder or enthusiast”, according to the study, is male, 19-30-years-old, and purchases mantises mostly due to either personal curiosity or scientific interest. Buyers are usually willing to spend over $30 per mantis, and most prefer aesthetically pleasing species over rarer ones.
(Can’t wait to see Paris Hilton carrying one around in her purse!)
(Knowing what they do to their mate, I thought for sure that women would be bigger praying mantis fans than men…)
-StudyFinds

SAVING GRACES:
As inflation continues to surge, some people are coming up with creative ways to save money. Asked about their strategies for fighting inflation, here’s how Canadians said they are responding, according to an Ipsos poll conducted for Global News . . .
• 54% said they are dining out less these days.
• 47% said they are putting off new purchases, like clothing.
• 46% are cutting back on entertainment spending.
• 18% are carpooling more or taking fewer trips as gas prices hit all-time highs.
• 26% plan to switch to a grocery store that has cheaper prices.
• 51% are spending more time studying sales flyers, and 31% are looking to use coupons or sales apps to save on essentials.
• 24% are eating less meat, and 22% are buying fewer fresh fruits and vegetables.
• 17% of parents are cutting back on their kids’ organized sports.
• 8% say they delayed or didn’t renew a prescription.
• 13% have dipped into retirement savings to cover increased costs.
(Am I the only one who’s so broke that he’s been doing all these for his entire life???)
(What inventive methods have you employed to make ends meet?)
-Global

DID YOU KNOW?
Watching less TV could cut heart disease, according to University of Hong Kong research. Coronary heart disease occurs when fatty material builds up inside coronary arteries, causing them to narrow, reducing the heart’s blood supply. The researchers found that more than one in 10 cases of coronary heart disease could be prevented if people reduced their TV viewing to less than an hour a day. They concluded: “Reducing time spent watching TV should be recognized as a key behavioral target for prevention of coronary heart disease, irrespective of other risk factors.” (Would eating an entire bag of Pork Rinds while in front of the TV be considered another “risk factor”?)
-TheGuardian

BS CHRONOMETER 05.26.22

TODAY’S BS REASONS TO PARTY . . .
• “Paper Airplane Day”, an unofficial observance honoring the simple aeronautical toy anyone can make. (Just remember: Once you throw a paper airplane, it’s no longer stationary!)
• “Blueberry Cheesecake Day”. Well, okay … if we have to!
• “World Dracula Day”, Bram Stoker’s Gothic horror novel “Dracula” was first published on this date in 1897. According to legend, the character may have been based on Stoker’s horrible boss.
• “Sally Ride Day”, The first American woman in space, Sally Ride, is a role model for young people, particularly for girls and those interested in science and space. At the time of her first flight, Ride, at age 32, was also the youngest US astronaut to ever travel in space.
• “Red Nose Day”, a campaign with the mission to end child poverty by funding programs that keep children safe, healthy, educated and empowered. People join together today to laugh and have fun. Since its debut in 2015, Red Nose Day has raised over $240 million to help over 25 million children. LINK: https://rednoseday.org/
• “World Redhead Day”, Some “Whack Redhead Facts”:
⇒ Less than 2% of the population has red hair.
⇒ Red hair is thicker than other colors, and harder to dye.
⇒ Redheads are more sensitive to hot, cold and pain, yet need about 20% more anesthesia to be sedated.
⇒ Redheads are more likely to be left-handed.
⇒ Contrary to some reports, red hair is NOT dye-ing out (sorry for the pun!). Although their numbers are decreasing, they are in no danger of extinction.
⇒ Redheaded women have more sex…according to Cosmo.

COMING UP . . .
[Fri] Heat Awareness Day
[Fri] Road Trip Day
[Sat] Hamburger Day
[Sat] Amnesty International Day

TODAY’S CELEBIRTHDAYS . . .
1948 [74] Stevie [Stephanie] Nicks, Phoenix AZ, pop-rock singer-songwriter (‘Edge of Seventeen’, Fleetwood Mac-‘Dreams’)/Rock & Roll Hall of Fame 2019 (and with Fleetwood Mac 1998)

1949 [73] Hank Williams Jr, Shreveport LA, country singer (‘All My Rowdy Friends Are Coming Over Tonight’, ‘If the South Woulda Won’)/son of Hank Williams Sr

1949 [73] Philip Michael Thomas, Columbus OH, TV actor (‘Tubbs’ on “Miami Vice” 1984-89)/voice of ‘Lance Vance’ in “Grand Theft Auto” video games

1964 [58] Lenny Kravitz, NYC, rock singer-guitarist (‘Fly Away’, ‘Are You Gonna Go My Way’)

1966 [56] Helena Bonham Carter, London UK, movie actress (“The King’s Speech”, “Alice in Wonderland”)

1971 [51] Matt Stone, Houston TX, TV writer & producer (co-creator of “South Park” with Trey Parker)

1975 [47] Lauryn Hill, South Orange NJ, pop-R&B singer (‘Doo Wop [That Thing]’, The Fugees-‘Killing Me Softly’)

1981 [41] Isaac Slade, Denver CO, pop-rock singer-pianist (The Fray-‘You Found Me’, ‘How to Save a Life’)

1983 [39] Scott Disick, Eastport NY, reality TV star (“Keeping Up With The Kardashians” 2007-2016)/clothing line owner (“Talentless”)/Baby-daddy to Kourtney Kardashian’s 3 children

THIS DAY IN SHOW BIZ . . .
1994 [28] Michael Jackson marries Lisa Marie Presley, Elvis’ daughter, in a secret ceremony in the Dominican Republic. They divorce 20 months later

2006 [16] “X-Men: The Last Stand” opens in movie theaters with the then-4th-highest debut in box office history

TODAY’S MUSIC EVENTS . . .
1977 [45] The members of KISS provide Marvel Comics with a vial of their blood to be mixed with the red ink used to print their upcoming comic book. The photo op takes place at the printing plant in Depew NY, where the comic will be made

2008 [14] Yale University awards Paul McCartney an honorary Doctorate of Music

TODAY’S RECORD . . .
2003 [19] Just 3 days after a previous record was set, Sherpa Lakpa Gelu climbs Mount Everest in 10 hours, 56 minutes

BULL’S BITS

BS WHACK FACTS
✓ The ashes of the average cremated person weigh 9 pounds (4.1 kg).
✓ The storage capacity of human brain exceeds 4 terabytes.
✓ A scientist cracked his knuckles on one hand for over 50 years to prove it did not cause Arthritis.
✓ There are more English-speaking people in India than in the U.S., U.K. and Canada combined.
✓ Ichiro Suzuki, baseball’s all-time hits leader, learned Spanish just for the purpose of trash talking opponents.
✓ Kenya has an ice hockey team.
-UberFacts, BathroomReadersInstitute

Best of BS . . .
BS WHY I’M ALWAYS LATE:
• I have developed and perfected the rare skill of turning off my alarm in my sleep.
• Coffee is more important to me than being on time.
• People drive too slow.
• I hate where I’m going more than I hate where I’ve been.
• It’s hard to make a grand entrance when you’re on time.
• I thought you said Friday.
• That one time I was early for something, I had to wait for all the stragglers to show up.
• There was an incident. It involved a toddler and a diaper. That’s all you need to know.
• I KNEW I should have taken that left toin at Albuquerque.
• Hey! I’m here. Whattdaya want?
• I have cats to serve.
-Twitter, first published in BS in 2018

BS BAD NAMES FOR A ROMANCE NOVEL:
• “From Here To Paternity”
• “Gone With The Next Door Neighbor”
• “You’ve Got Mail . . . Order Bride”
• “The MILF on the Shelf: A Christmas Love Story”
• “Burning Sensation”
• “‘Keep the Change’ and Other Date-Night Whispers”
• “For God’s Sake, Just Rip His Shirt Off And Spare Us The 180 Pages Of Butt-Clenchingly Turgid Prose Leading Up To The Deed”
-Twitter, first published in BS in 2020

BS WEB GOODIE:
Definitely tipworthy:   https://tinyurl.com/2m72j9tc

BS RANDOM JOKE:
My boss is going to fire the employee with the worst posture. I have a hunch, it might be me.

BS PHONE STARTER:
What, to you, never stopped being “cool”? (Jeans and a t-shirt? Johnny Cash? Ray Bans? The word ‘cool’?)

BS WATER COOLER QUESTION:
Question:  37% of people admit they have embarrassed themselves in a work meeting by doing THIS. What is it?
Answer:  Hiccup

BS DEEP THOUGHT:
Success is a science; if you have the conditions, you get the result.