Wednesday, May 18, 2016 Edition: #5733

Bully For You!

★ Ever-troubled actor Charlie Sheen is now being sued for an alleged unpaid credit card bill. The former “Two-and-a-Half Men” star has been served with papers by American Express claiming that he owes an overdue balance of $287,879.28 on his Platinum AmEx card. That balance includes more than $8,000 in late fees. Sheen was reportedly given the deadline of March 12th to pay the outstanding bill, but failed to make a payment. He’s blaming a former business manager for the entire mess.
★ ‘Superman’ has apparently dumped his girlfriend. 33-year-old Brit actor Henry Cavill (“Man of Steel”) was first linked to 19-year-old Bristol University student Tara King last October, when they were spotted attending a rugby match at London’s Twickenham Stadium. However, reports have emerged that he’s once again single, ditching his girlfriend just weeks after they celebrated his birthday together. An inside source says “Henry and Tara have split, it is official. Henry said the two of them could stay friends.”
★ And Calvin Klein’s latest underwear ad is making a lot of people feel awkward. It’s an ‘upskirt’ photo, shot straight up 23-year-old model Klara Kristin’s slip, and it’s still reverberating around the Internet. Apparently you are supposed to ‘flash’ when wearing the new undies. Were the voyeurism depicted in the ad attempted in real life it would be worthy of calling the cops. There are supporters, however, some who’ve shot and posted their own upskirt photos (#mycalvin).

• “Chelsea” (Netflix) – Gwen Stefani (“This Is What the Truth Feels Like”).
• “Ellen DeGeneres Show” (syndicated/CTV2) – Drake (“Views”).
• “Jimmy Kimmel Live” (ABC/CityTV) – Macklemore & Ryan Lewis (“This Unruly Mess I’ve Made”).
• “Last Call With Carson Daly” (NBC) – Murs & 9th Wonder (“The Final Adventure”).
• “Late Late Show With James Corden” (CBS/M3) – Broods (“Conscious”, out June 24th).
• “Late Show With Stephen Colbert” (CBS/Global) – Band of Horses (“Why Are You OK”, out June 10th).
• “Survivor” (CBS/Global) – In the Season 32 finalé, castaways from all 3 tribes remain; one is crowned the ‘Sole Survivor’. As usual, the final show is followed by a “Reunion Special”.
• “Tonight Show Starring Jimmy Fallon” (NBC/CTV2) – OneRepublic (“Native”).

• Adele – Her new video “Send My Love (To Your New Lover)” is scheduled to premiere at Sunday’s Billboard Music Awards.
• Florida Georgia Line – “Get Your Shine On” has whole new meaning now that Tyler Hubbard has a black eye. He’s revealed on Instagram that the shiner is due to “a little dirt nap on the motocross track”.
• Justin Timberlake – “Can’t Stop the Feeling!” has debuted at the top of the ‘Billboard Hot 100’, making it his 5th solo #1 hit.
• Rihanna – With “Needed Me”, she ties Michael Jackson for the 3rd-most Top 10 hits of all-time; it’s her 29th.
• Miranda Lambert – She admits she’s not a big fan of social media. She has every one of her posts scrutinized before they’re sent to avoid embarrassing mistakes. Quote: “I don’t need to know what everybody’s doing all the time, especially with heroes of mine. I want to keep admiring them from afar.”
• Oasis – An upcoming documentary about the Brit band now has a name and release date. “Pitchfork” reports that the filmmakers behind the Oscar-winning Amy Winehouse doc “Amy” are titling the new project “Supersonic” and it will be released this October.
• Prince – His estate administrator, Bremer Trust Bank, has called on any ‘long-lost relatives’ that surface to cover the cost of a DNA test before laying any claim to his estate. Under Minnesota law, his fortune is to be split evenly amongst his heirs, his 6 siblings.

A statistical look at who we are and the things we do …
• 86% of women say the biggest fashion mistake a guy can make is wearing pants too short (‘floods’).
• 50% of women never leave home without a mirror.
• 40% of us admit that we worry … every day.
• 39% of women say they can’t stand it when their significant other leaves an empty toilet paper roll, because it really messes up their morning routine.
• 34% of married people say they had no idea about their spouse’s finances before they got married.
• 18% of drivers will have their ‘low fuel’ warning light appear on any given day.

A mother’s voice may do far more than soothe her child, new Stanford University research suggests. The study shows that children’s brains actually ‘light up’ at the sound of mom’s voice. When mothers speak, several areas of their children’s brains are activated, including those involved in emotion and reward processing, social functioning, facial recognition, and the detection of what is personally relevant. This heightened neurological reaction occurs from the sound of mom’s voice alone, not from any other females. The researchers have found that infants can identify their own mother with 97% accuracy, even from recordings less than 1 second long. (This power continues after childhood, every time your mother calls you by all 3 of your names.)

✓ Do Something New – Even taking a different route home will change things up a little bit.
✓ Thank Somebody – Gratitude should be a daily routine. It will change your outlook.
✓ Be Silly – Don’t take life so seriously all the time. It will destroy you.
✓ Do Something for Somebody – Even small things can make big changes.
✓ Go Easy – You don’t have to do everything that everybody asks of you. You can’t. It’s OK to say no.
✓ Forgive – Anger and frustration will actually shorten your lifespan.
✓ Unplug – Stop living in a virtual world on gadgets and take some time to be present.
✓ Live in the Now – Be aware of things going on around you and stop dwelling on the past.
✓ Read – Try to read something every day to expand your horizons and your mind.
✓ Rest – You don’t always have to be doing stuff. It’s OK to nothing. Not always, but sometimes.

Facebook wants to bring Virtual Reality to your social media. In 2014, the social media giant bought Oculus VR for $2 billion, and they’ve since been developing playful ways to integrate the VR technology into their brand. The latest plan is to introduce 360-degree pictures to your newsfeed. Users have been able to upload and view 360-degree videos since September, and in the next few weeks they’ll be able to do the same with still images. Facebook has found a way for users with a panorama feature on their smartphones to make the images. The photos will be viewable via both the Oculus Rift and Samsung’s Gear VR. (Great advancement! Now we get to see people’s cats acting cute from all different angles.)

Cutting-edge vocab …
• ‘Billionaire Bait’ – A retail item designed to appeal to a person who is extremely rich.
• ‘Dentist Beard’ – A neat and symmetrical goatee. Think George Clooney.
• ‘Financial Impotence’ – The state of not having enough ready cash to cover an unexpected expense, even a relatively minor one.
• ‘Frunk’ – A trunk that is mounted in the front of a vehicle, as in a Tesla.

An ill-fated Kickstarter project wanted to track … your toots. An enterprise named CH4 promised a belt-worn hi-tech device that would “keep track of your gases”, but apparently the wearable-loving Kickstarter community just isn’t into it. The device is designed to detect when you fart and then correlate your fart quantity with what you’ve eaten. The project inspired plenty of think pieces about the tech community reaching “peak wearable” technology, but maybe there’s a simpler explanation for the massive fail: Most people simply don’t want a gadget that counts all their farts. With $3,827 raised, CH4 fell far short of its $180,000 goal. Hard to believe, considering these extremely professional-looking technical drawings …

• Sea otters have a pouch under their forearm to store food and their favorite rocks.
• Crows are little pranksters and they love playing tricks on one another.
• Baby female chimpanzees will gather sticks and care for them in the same way a mother chimpanzee cares for her offspring.
• If kangaroo joeys are frightened, they’ll jump headfirst into their mother’s pouch.


1952 [64] George Strait, Poteet TX, semi-retired country singer (“Here For a Good Time”, “River of Love”)/most #1 hits of any country artist (60)

1970 [46] Tina Fey, Upper Darby PA, TV actress-writer-producer (“Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt” since 2015, “30 Rock” 2006-13)/movie actress (“Baby Mama”)/author (“Bossypants”)

1975 [41] Jack Johnson, North Shore HI, pop singer-songwriter (“You & Your Heart”, “Upside Down”)

1979 [37] David Nail, Kennett MO, country singer (“Whatever She’s Got”, “Let It Rain”)

1981 [35] Allen Leech, Killiney, Ireland, TV actor (‘Tom Branson’ on “Downton Abbey” 2010-15)

• “Emergency Medical Services Day”, observed on the Wednesday of “EMS Week”, to honor those who provide the day-to-day lifesaving services on medicine’s ‘front line’.

• “Employee Health & Fitness Day”, an annual observance on the 3rd Wednesday in May to promote the benefits of physical activity for employees through work site health promotion activities.

• “HIV Vaccine Awareness Day”, promoting the continued urgent need for a vaccine to prevent HIV infection and AIDS.

• “International Museum Day”, established in 1977 by the International Council of Museums to draw attention to the world’s museums, no matter how large, small, or strange. Here are a few truly odd ones …
– Air Sickness Bag Virtual Museum NET:
– Amsterdam Tattoo Museum (Amsterdam, Netherlands)
– Barney Smith’s Toilet Seat Art Museum (San Antonio TX)
– Bata Shoe Museum (Toronto ON)
– Burnt Food Museum (Arlington MA) NET:
– Canadian Canoe Museum (Peterborough ON)
– Exotic World Exotic Dancing Museum (Helendale CA)
– The Hair Museum (Independence MO)
– International UFO Museum & Research Center (Roswell NM)
– LeRoy House & Jell-O Gallery (LeRoy NY)
– Museum of Bad Art (Boston MA)
– The Museum of Dirt (Boston MA)
– National Museum of Funeral History (Houston TX)
– Riceworld (Los Banos, Philippines)
– Squished Penny Museum (Washington DC)
– Insectarium de Montréal (Montréal QC)
– Ukrainian Museum of Canada (Saskatoon SK)
– Vodka Museum (Moscow, Russia) with over 50,000 bottles on display. Visitors are offered 10 different types to taste.

• “No Dirty Dishes Day”, if nothing else a convenient excuse to eat 3 meals in a restaurant.

• “Visit Your Relatives Day”, a day to renew relationships with seldom-seen relatives. Uh, maybe there’s a reason they are seldom seen?

2001 [15] Animated hit “Shrek” is released in movie theaters and goes on to rack up $484 million in worldwide box office (Mike Myers, Eddie Murphy, and Cameron Diaz later reprise their roles in 3 sequels, released in 2004, 2007, and 2010)

2011 [05] John Lennon’s handwritten lyrics for the 1967 Beatles song “Lucy In the Sky With Diamonds” sell for $237,132 in Beverly Hills CA

2004 [12] Arizona Diamondbacks’ 40-year-old lefty Randy Johnson becomes ‘Oldest Major League Baseball Pitcher to Throw a Perfect Game’, beating Atlanta Braves 2-0

2012 [04] Facebook raises $16 billion in the largest tech IPO in stock market history

[Thurs] Scooter Day
[Fri] “The Angry Birds Movie”; “Neighbors 2: Sorority Rising”; “The Nice Guys” open in movie theaters
[Fri] Endangered Species Day
[Fri] Bike to Work Day
[Sat] Preakness Stakes (Baltimore MD)
[Sun] 2016 Billboard Music Awards (Las Vegas NV)
[Mon] Victoria Day (Canada)
This Week Is … Dog Bite Prevention Week
This Month Is … Mediterranean Diet Month


• People behind you at the movies always asking you to remove your hat.
• Cardinals always seemingly lose in the NFL playoffs.
• Renegade Vatican priest who was not only defrocked but depantsed.
• April Fool’s prank when white smoke was seen over St Peter’s.
• Constantly having to answer the sarcastic question “Is the pope Catholic?”
• Doctrine of ‘papal infallibility’ no help to him on “Jeopardy!”
• Not getting nun.
• And the pope’s #1 pet peeve … hat hair.

☎ If Hillary Clinton becomes US President, what would her husband Bill be called? (The First Man? Mr ex-President? White House Two-Timer?)

An amnesiac walks into a bar. He goes up to a woman on a barstool and says, “So, do I come here often?”

As you’re walking down the street, you encounter a dog that’s yawning. What does it mean?
a. It’s bored.
b. It stayed up too late watching ‘Carpool Karaoke’ with James Corden last night.
c. It’s anxious. [CORRECT, according to animal behaviorist Emily Weiss.]

Question: Approximately 450,000 people on Earth have THIS in common.
Answer: They’re 100-years-old or more.

Never make fun of someone who speaks broken English; it means they speak аnother language. (Actually, it’s the world’s most-spoken language.)

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