Friday, May 20, 2016 Edition: #5735

Another Sheetload of Bull!

★ 48-year-old actor Daniel Craig has reportedly turned down circa $100 million to appear as ‘James Bond’ in 2 more films in the continuing franchise. The whopping financial offer is made up of profit shares, endorsements, and a credit as co-producer. He’s already starred in four ‘007’ movies, but has made it clear he wants to step down from the coveted role. An inside source says: “Craig had told people after shooting that ‘Spectre’ would be his final outing but the film company still felt he could come round … if he was offered a [big] money deal.”
– “The Sun”
★ Veteran actress Christine Baranski isn’t saying goodbye to the “The Good Wife” just yet, after landing a deal to star in an upcoming spin-off series. The acclaimed legal drama ended its 7-season run earlier this month, but CBS-TV has announced that an as-yet-untitled spinoff program will move from the small-screen to the Internet streaming platform CBS All Access. The follow-up centers on Baranski’s attorney character ‘Diane Lockhart’ and lawyer ‘Lucca Quinn’ (Cush Jumbo). The spin-off is expected to premiere next Spring.
★ And ‘Rory Gilmore’ is a mom! 34-year-old “Gilmore Girls” actress Alexis Bledel secretly welcomed a son late last year with actor-husband Vincent Kartheiser (“Mad Men”). It’s the couple’s first child. They’re good at running under the radar; they wed in a private ceremony in 2014 but news of the marriage didn’t surface for 3 months. Alexis began working on the upcoming “Gilmore Girls” Netflix revival in February. It’s co-star Scott Patterson (‘Luke Danes’) that let the baby news slip in a new interview.

• “All The Way” (HBO) – Bryan Cranston (“Breaking Bad”) is unrecognizable in this made-for-TV movie about US president Lyndon B Johnson as the makeup completely transforms him. Cranston played this same role as ‘LBJ’ in a stage production 2013-14.
• “Billboard Music Awards” (ABC/CTV) – Sunday Ludacris & Ciara host the 2016 edition from T-Mobile Arena in Las Vegas NV. The Weeknd leads nominations with 19; Justin Bieber has 12; Drake and Fetty Wap have 11 apiece; Adele and Taylor Swift 8 each. Performers include: Ariana Grande, Blake Shelton & Gwen Stefani, Demi Lovato, DNCE, Fifth Harmony, Meghan Trainor, Nick Jonas & Tove Lo, P!nk, Rihanna, and Shawn Mendes. Britney Spears receives the ‘Millennium Award’; Celine Dion the ‘ICON Award’; Madonna pays tribute to Prince.
• “Chelsea” (Netflix) – Christina Aguilera (“The Voice”).
• “Good Morning America” (ABC) – Ariana Grande ((“Dangerous Woman”, out today).
• Hangout Festival (Gulf Shores AL) – The 3-day music event matches much of the lineup from Coachella, plus Alabama Shakes, Florence + The Machine, The Weeknd and more.
• “Jimmy Kimmel Live” (ABC/CityTV) – Tonight Joanna Newsom (“Divers”).
• “Last Call With Carson Daly” (NBC) – Tonight Dream Junkies (“Good Religion”). Rerun.
• “Late Late Show With James Corden” (CBS/M3) – Tonight Miguel (“Wildheart”). Rerun.
• “Late Night With Seth Meyers” (NBC/CTV) – Tonight Thomas Rhett (“Tangled Up”). Rerun.
• “Late Show With Stephen Colbert” (CBS/Global) – Tonight Wolf Parade (“Apologies To the Queen Mary”).
• “Live With Kelly” (syndicated/CTV) – Today Blake Shelton (“If I’m Honest”, out today).
• “Preacher” (AMC) – Series debut Sunday. Dominic Cooper stars in this new adaptation of Garth Ennis & Steve Dillon’s cult comic book. The series follows a West Texas preacher who is inhabited by a mysterious entity that gives him a highly unusual power.
• Rock On the Range (Columbus OH) – The SRO 10th annual 3-day weekend rock festival stars Disturbed, Five Finger Death Punch, Red Hot Chili Peppers, Rob Zombie, Shinedown plus many more.
• “Saturday Night Live” (NBC/Global) – Host “SNL” veteran Fred Armisen; musical guest Aussie singer-songwriter Courtney Barnett (“Sometimes I Sit and Think, and Sometimes I Just Sit”).
• “Tonight Show Starring Jimmy Fallon” (NBC/CTV2) – Tonight Flatbush Zombies (“3001: A Laced Odyssey”).

• Aerosmith – The band is still considering a tour with a replacement for Steven Tyler, despite the threat of legal action from the singer’s management team. Tyler has been at odds with the rest of the band since he began work on solo material in Nashville.
• Drake – He & Alessia Cara lead nominations for the upcoming “iHeartRadio Much Music Video Awards”, landing 7 nominations each; last year’s big winner The Weeknd has 6. Canada’s top music video awards, hosted by model Gigi Hadid, are June 19th in Toronto ON.
• Grateful Dead – A massive tribute album called “Day Of the Dead” is released today. The 5-CD set, also available on limited-edition vinyl, includes tracks from The Flaming Lips, Jenny Lewis, Jim James (My Morning Jacket), Mumford & Sons, The National, The War on Drugs, Wilco and more. Profits go to the Red Hot Organization, which fights AIDS/HIV worldwide.
• Jennifer Lopez – She’s hitting back at constant reports that she’s a ‘diva’, insisting it’s a label she doesn’t deserve. In “Hollywood Reporter”, the 46-year-old says: “I’ve always been a hard worker, on time, doing what I’m supposed to do, and getting that label because you reach a certain amount of success.”
• Lenny Kravitz – He along with Alice In Chains are lined up to join Guns N’ Roses on tour. They’ll open select dates on the “Not In This Lifetime” tour, which begins on June 23rd at Ford Field in Detroit MI.
• One Direction – Harry Styles’ new solo material will “blow the socks off the world”, according to Snow Patrol guitarist Johnny McDaid, who’s been writing songs with the 1D singer. No release date has been announced. Styles parted ways with the group’s management company to go it alone, and is also planning an acting career, first in Christopher Nolan’s WW2 movie “Dunkirk” (2017).
• Rage Against the Machine – Members of the band are reuniting for the first time in 5 years. Sources tell “Billboard” it isn’t a Rage reunion, but rather a supergroup called Prophets of Rage, consisting of guitarist Tom Morello, bassist Tim Commerford, and drummer Brad Wilk, along with Public Enemy’s Chuck D, and Cypress Hill’s B-Real. They’re slated to make their debut June 3rd at LA’s Hollywood Palladium, with a full tour being considered..

• “The Angry Birds Movie” ( PG Animated Comedy ): When an island populated by happy, flightless birds is visited by mysterious green piggies, it’s up to ‘Red’, ‘Chuck’, and ‘Bomb’ to figure out what’s up. If an app-turned-movie seems odd, keep in mind are 2 in development about Uber (no BS!). Voice cast: Jason Sudeikis, Josh Gad, Maya Rudolph, Charli XCX.
• “Neighbors 2: Sorority Rising” ( R-Rated Comedy ): A sequel to the Summer 2014 hit “Neighbors”. After a sorority moves in next door, which is even more debauched than the fraternity before it, ‘Mac’ & ‘Kelly’ have to ask for help from their former enemy ‘Teddy’. Stars Seth Rogen, Rose Byrne, Zac Efron, and Chloë Grace Moretz.
• “The Nice Guys” ( R-Rated Action Comedy ): Russell Crowe & Ryan Gosling star as a mismatched pair of private eyes investigating the apparent suicide of a fading porn star in 1970s Los Angeles. Co-stars Angourie Rice, Matt Bomer. Think “Starsky & Hutch” meets “Boogie Nights”, plus a little bit of “Lethal Weapon” mixed in.
• Opening in limited release: “Maggie’s Plan” (Comedy); “Ma Ma” (Drama); and “Weiner” (Documentary).

Yes, this is what we’ve all been waiting for … a device that lets you lick your cat without getting hair on your tongue. After all, sometimes you just want to show your puss some real affection. Not just the soothing strokes you enjoy, or the snuggles she always wriggles away from, but an actual display of love that cats can understand. You know, like their mothers did when they were kittens. The new ‘Licki Brush’ is a fake tongue that you pop in your mouth and use to gently lick your cat whenever you feel the need. It even has the scratchy, rough texture of an actual cat tongue, which helps to brush your feline’s fur as you slurp. (We advise you use it in private, when no one is around to judge.)

• Color blind people tend to have better night vision.
• Night vision goggles use green phosphor because the human eye can see more shades of green than any other color.
– List


1946 [70] Cher (Cherilyn Sarkisian LaPierre), El Centro CA, oldies singer (“Believe”, Sonny & Cher-“I Got You Babe”)/movie actress (Oscar-“Moonstruck”)

1972 [44] Busta Rhymes (Trevor Smith Jr), Brooklyn NY, rapper (“Touch It”, Pussycat Dolls f/Busta Rhymes–”Don’t Cha”)

1977 [39] Matt Czuchry, Manchester NH, TV actor (“The Good Wife” 2009-16)

Classic rock drummer Stan Lynch (Tom Petty & The Heartbreakers) is 61; Indie rock singer-guitarist Mikel Jollet (Airborne Toxic Event) is 42; One-hit-wonder Gotye (“Somebody That I Used to Know”) is 36.

Alt-rock singer Morrissey (ex-The Smiths) is 57; TV actor Michael Kelly (“House of Cards”) is 47; Model Naomi Campbell is 46; TV actress Ginnifer Goodwin (“Once Upon a Time”) is 38; Movie actress Maggie Q (”Divergent” films) is 37.

• “Be a Millionaire Day”, a celebration of the joys of achieving millionaire status. Here’s how you go about it – first, get a whole bunch of money …
• “Bike-to-Work Day”, the 22nd annual observed on the 3rd Friday of May as a highlight of “National Bike Month”. It’s promoted as a solution to several of today’s problems, including obesity, traffic congestion, and air pollution.
• “Eliza Doolittle Day”, a day named in honor of the lead character in the famous musical “My Fair Lady”. The occasion is inspired by the lyrics: ‘Next week on the 20th of May/I proclaim Eliza Doolittle Day’. Participants are encouraged to mark the day by making proper use of language.
• “Endangered Species Day”, the 12th annual observed on the 3rd Friday of May to encourage us to learn about the importance of protecting animals that are on the edge of extinction.
• “Pick Strawberries Day”, which sounds like lots of fun until you get down in the dirt on hands & knees with sweat trickling down your forehead and spiders crawling up your arms.
• “Pizza Party Day”, an excuse to make Friday pie-day on the 3rd Friday in May.
• “Weights & Measures Day”, marking an 1875 treaty that established the International Bureau of Weights & Measures. That means you’re just as fat in Pago Pago as you are here at home.

• “End Of the World Party Day”, an excuse for an impromptu bash on the 5th anniversary of late radio evangelist Harold Camping’s 2011 prediction that the world would end on this day.
• “Flower Moon”, the Full Moon of May, so-named for the abundant flowers during this time. Other names include the ‘Corn Planting Moon’, and the ‘Milk Moon’.
• “Learn to Swim Day”, the 4th annual to raise awareness of the importance of teaching children to swim. Learning this invaluable life skill is essential for safety as well as fun.
• “Preakness Stakes” at Pimlico Race Course in Baltimore MD, the 141st running of the 2nd jewel in the Triple Crown of thoroughbred horse racing.
• “US Armed Forces Day”, celebrated since 1949 on the 3rd Saturday of May to salute Americans serving in the Army, Navy, Marines, Air Force, and Coast Guard.
• “Wait Staff Day”, set aside for restaurant managers and patrons to show appreciation for the efforts of servers.
• “World Day for Cultural Diversity”, a UN-sanctioned event to help communities understand the value of cultural diversity and learn how to live together in harmony.

• “Buy-a-Musical-Instrument Day”. But respect your neighbors … don’t make it drums!
• “Canadian Immigrants Day”, celebrating the many contributions made by immigrants to Canada. That includes 25,000+ Syrians who’ve arrived in the past few months.
• “Find Your Soul-Mate Day”, a day to join a singles group, explore an online dating service, or join a club where you might find someone with common interests.
• “International Day for Biological Diversity”, created by the UN to increase understanding and awareness of biodiversity issues.
• “Maritime Day”, an annual observance to recognize the maritime industry. Har, hoist that bilge, matey!
• “World Goth Day”, celebrating the Goth scene and exposing it to the rest of the world. The subculture of music & fashion is often associated with dark attire, makeup, and hair.

• “Victoria Day”, observed annually on the Monday preceding May 25th, and commemorating the birth date of Britain’s Queen Victoria on May 24, 1819. It’s a holiday that’s only celebrated in Canada (originating in 1845), and it’s often referred to as ‘May Two-Four Weekend’.

2011 [05] Woody Allen’s “Midnight in Paris” and the sequel film “Pirates Of the Caribbean: On Stranger Tides” open in movie theaters

2012 [03] The final episode of “House”, starring Hugh Laurie as pessimistic doctor ‘Gregory House’, airs on FOX-TV after 8 seasons

2013 [02] Country singer-TV personality Kellie Pickler is named winner of the 16th season of ABC-TV’s “Dancing With the Stars”

2009 [06] Michael Jackson delays the July 8th opening of his “This Is It” concert series at London’s O2 arena by 5 days, claiming he needs more time for dress rehearsals (he doesn’t make it, dying of a drug overdose on June 25th)

2015 [01] Rolling Stones play a surprise warmup gig at the 1,300-capacity Fonda Theatre in Los Angeles, performing the entire “Sticky Fingers” album (in the audience: Bruce Willis, Harry Styles, Jack Nicholson, Leonard Cohen, and Patricia Arquette)

[Mon] Dylan Fest: A Celebration of Bob Dylan’s 75th Birthday (Nashville TN)
[Mon] Taffy Day
[Mon] World Turtle Day
[Tues] Brothers Day
[Tues] International Tiara Day
This Week Is … Heritage Breeds Week
This Month Is … Global Civility Awareness Month


• “I walk 10 miles a day.”
• “My diet is making me lose a lot of weight.”
• “My children aren’t vaccinated.”
• “I use my own waste to grow food.”
• “I don’t have a TV.”
• “I never eat meat.”
• “I have a very small carbon footprint.”
• “I don’t vote … the system is too corrupt.”
– Thanks to John-Clark Levin

☎ What’s the weirdest food that you love?

The best way to win an argument is to start by being right.

Question: You’re twice as likely to do THIS at work in the afternoon than in the morning.
Answer: Complain.

True greatness isn’t being better than others. It’s being better than you used to be.

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